A/N: Thanks for reading my fic, could you please leave a review so I know whether or not I should continue it.
Thanks to gabyhyatt for the review!
With sad yet patient soul, through evil and pain
-S.T. Coleridge
Misao
As she looked down at the wooden planks beneath her the world around her seemed to shift and sigh with her current predicament. All her problems seemed to be centralized around four distinct people, including herself. Kaoru had led her to this spot, had savoured its closeness to nature but had slowly been withdrawing herself from it. "Nice people always finish last."
Why is it that everything, no matter how good, always goes wrong in the end?
The pain in her eyes was echoed in the tiny waves crashing upon the shore. She leant back against a post and watched as the tide came in. It was the symbolic cycle, the continuous pattern of pushing and pulling, of giving and taking. Friendship was like the tide, if you didn't get an equal amount of give and take, it becomes unable to function.
I could have tried harder.
Sea green eyes roamed the far distance, the unfocused gaze not glancing at the other three girls.
If I had, it would have been too much.
The girl sighed and stretched out her legs before pulling her knees up to her chest
I did try though. I tried to understand and I failed.
The waves of the lake seemed to gain depth as the anger the girl was feeling was forced out.
Why can't I figure this out? Is it because I'm looking for something that isn't there?
"Hey! Where did you go? You missed last period…" Misao was calling out to Kaoru as she walked up the dock. Her friend sat by herself in the golden sunlight, shoes off and the neck of a guitar poking out to her left.
"What are you doing? You know we have exams next week…" Misao kept talking as she walked across to Kaoru. She knew that her friend would be there, drawn to the lake like a moth to a flame. It was her escape from the reality of the world, her own sanctuary where she could be at peace. Notes of music strummed across the lake, Kaoru was humming slightly and with her back to Misao, she did not notice her visitor until she had spoken. The Kaoru turned and looked directly up into Misao's eyes.
"Why should you care? Why should anyone care?" Misao frowned at this response.
"What do you mean? Of course I care." Her brow creased further as she noticed the red rimmed eyes and the slightly blotched face. Kaoru turned away and begun strumming on her guitar once more, the music drifting over the lake lazily as a tune began to form.
"Music is so beautiful; you can become someone else entirely when you play it. The music takes you away so that you don't have to face anything that even resembles reality." Kaoru sighed as her hand left the strings and a chord was left floating on the waves of the lake.
"Do you want to become some one else?" Misao asked quietly, not knowing if she wanted to know the answer.
"Yes… I do." Kaoru whispered as a small tear ran down her cheek.
A warm wind on the lake whispered as it went past the two still girls. The water formed ripples as water seemed to reach out to become the wind with its easy movement across and towards the mountains and into the distance.
"You can't say that. Would you really say that if you didn't feel so bad?" Misao asked the question slowly and softly. She sat on the dock behind Kaoru, the boards smooth beneath her. The water looked clear and blue, the reflection of the mountains in the distance cutting a pattern across the far side of the lake.
"I can say that Misao." Kaoru responded whilst looking at Misao over her shoulder.
"What if everyone said that they wanted to be someone else? Do you really think that you can escape whatever you're trying to run from by being someone else?" She could feel a frown etched upon her face but her words were laced with care. As Kaoru looked back over the water, Misao felt a change in her friend's demeanour.
"What is it about me that the others don't like Misao? Have I done something wrong?" Kaoru stood up and held the guitar tightly around its neck with her left hand, shoes in her right and a strained look upon her face.
"I'm just not good enough, am I?" The words were quietly spoken as she walked past Misao, each step that she took, each seemed heavier than the last. Behind Kaoru, the girl bowed her head and slowly evaporated along with the memory.
Kaoru had never let her emotions be shown but it was then that Misao could see. Kaoru's eyes were the windows to her soul, expressing what her face did not.
I couldn't look her in the eyes anymore; I could look into her eyes and see her pain.
Misao turned her head and gazed out upon the lake, the autumn wind picking its way across the lake with little resistance. Misao looked down at the disappearing steps, the water slowly making its way upwards, Meguimi had moved, ever practically, to remain dry. The tide, it was the natural balance of life, giving and taking away with complete disregard for time. Instead of letting her emotions act like the tide, she had bottled them up. She had hidden behind a façade, like the upturned boat. She had created an outer shell for herself, not showing what she really felt, and protecting her at the same time.
Kaoru was sitting on the edge of the dock, her legs swinging in a pattern, her face lost in memory. She looked so young, so innocent. The events that had fallen upon her she had not deserved. Misao had thought the only way to protect her was to move away, hoping that the others could see the ramifications of what they were doing.
She was wrong.
