DUDE! This is officially the very first chapter written by the author who posted it! dances

Haruko: Yeah…all other chapters are written by me. waves

Hikari: But not this one! dances some more

Haruko: Which is probably why it sucks…

Hikari: It does not!

Haruko: Whatever, anyways, neither of us own Naruto. Or any other characters for that matter. Though I do own a few new mangas as of yesterday…

Hikari: I still need Hands Off!

Haruko: yeah, yeah, please review!

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Two girls sat in chair up on what seemed to be a stage; below them were rows and rows of seats, all filled with people. Most of them whispering, others looking upon the stage to see when it would start. All they saw were the two girls, apparently the hosts, and a couple of empty chairs.

One of the girls was tapping a pencil she had in her hand obsessively against the clipboard she had sitting on her lap. Her wavy brown hair sat around her shoulders, occasionally flipping to match the way she would turn her head every other minute. She wore a very large black sweatshirt, the sleeves falling over her hands to the point she had to pull them up all the time to be able to use her fingers. The sweatshirt had the Konohagakure symbol on the front, and a picture on the back which no one could make out due to the back of the chair. She was extremely impatient, looking around the room while the pencil continued to beat the clipboard.

The other girl had long blonde hair, which she had clipped up in a large black clip on the back of her head. She looked a bit more professional, with a black business coat and sleek black pants. Her right leg was crossed over her left, but bounced slightly as she whispered into her collar. She wore glasses, thin, black, oval shapes frames with a pink tint to the sides. She was looking around, with what seemed to be a paranoid expression on her face; still whispering into her collar. "Where are they?" she whispered frantically. "They are supposed to be here now."

There was a slight crackle from the other end, and then a reply. "They are coming; one of them said something about car trouble on the way over here. Oh wait…here they are now. We are sending them up."

The blonde sighed, but the straightened up. She turned to the audience, speaking into the microphone she had clipped to the front of her suit. "Hello all and welcome to 'The Interview with a Puppet Master.' We are terrible sorry for the delay, our guests had some technical difficulties on the way over here, but they are here now…talk about our guests…" she turned to the side of the stage, where a door had opened. "Please give a warm welcome to the guests of our show, the Puppet master himself, Kankuro."

There was applause from the crowd as Kankuro, wearing a huge black sweatshirt, jeans, converse, and his kitty hat, walked across the stage while waving and smiling to the crowd. He took the seat closest to the two girls.

"The mistress of the fan, Temari," again there was applause, though not as loud, as Temari walked across the stage. She apparently didn't want to appear in this interview, for she just grunted and took the seat next to Kankuro.

"And last but not least, Gaara of the desert!" There was an explosion of applause from the crowd as Gaara sulked across the stage, glaring at anyone he could lay his eyes on. Dozens of fan girls squealed, and a couple fainted as he sat next to Temari, crossing his arms over his chest.

The blonde girl turned to the crowd, smiling slightly. "And we are your hosts, Haruko," she motioned to the girl next to her, who lifted her arm in reply. "And myself, Hikari Sukuru. We are going to be the interviewers today. Now…Haruko?"

Haruko straightened up, crossing her own leg over her other. "Ahem." She coughed. "Kankuro, I have to ask, besides the jumpsuit you wear in the series, do you wear any other outfit?"

Kankuro shrugged, "My jumpsuit and kitty ears are my signature. Why would I change them?" He had straightened up, showing off a feeling of importance as he answered.

"Okay then, off to the next question." Hikari muttered, looking down at her notes. "Okay, this one is from one of our readers, Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo asks, 'Kuro-tan, are you one of those creepy, old, perverted men my mom tells me to stay away from?"

Kankuro's eyes got wide and Temari tried her best to stifle her laughter, and failed miserably. Gaara just rolled his eyes. "Well." Kankuro started, looking to his siblings. "I'll have to say no to that, I'm not old." He smiled weakly as he said this, and scratched the back of his head.

Hikari coughed, and Haruko joined Temari in laughing. "Ohhhhkay then, onto the next question." Hikari said, once again looking down to her notes. "This one if from A.K.W., 'To the sand trio, what music to you like? Do you have any favorite bands or singers?"

Gaara shook his head. "I guess you could say I enjoy listening to Metal, but Kankuro has kept me away from music pretty much."

Temari smiled. "J-pop definitely. Favorite artist? Perhaps Utada Hikaru. I adore her song Passion."

"It'd have to be Techno." Kankuro said with a nod. "I listen to techno when I spray-paint.(1) Scooter is definitely my favorite though. I'm not sure about which song is my favorite though, either One (Always Hardcore) or Weekend!"

"Okay." Haruko said, finally able to speak through her laughter. "This one is also from A.K.W., 'Kuro, boxers or briefs?"

After looking slightly surprised by this question, Kankuro answered with a "Boxers, definitely.

Haruko's eyebrow rose. "And is there a reason behind this?"

Kankuro smirked. "Mmmaaaaaayyyyyyybbbbbeeeeeeee." This created quite a strange look from Haruko, somewhere between disgust and curiosity.

"Okay then." Hikari cut in. "Next question, again, by A.K.W., 'Kankuro, have you ever played Dance Dance Revolution?"

Kankuro stopped smirking at Haruko and turned to Hikari. "No, actually I haven't. But from what I've heard, it's a blast. I'll have to try it sometime."

"Next question," Haruko muttered, still trying to recover from her last question. "This one is for Gaara, from Gaara-of-the-sand-desert. 'Gaara, why were you so nice to Kankuro at the dinner table?'"

Gaara looked up from what seemed to be sleep, sighed, and crossed his arms over his chest. "I felt I didn't need to stop Kankuro from singing, because I knew it was coming, and I wanted Temari to realize what was going on. But apparently she didn't. I also wanted to see if he'd actually start singing, which he did." He glared towards his older brother. "And he shouldn't expect it to happen again."

Kankuro shrunk back in his seat, and Temari looked down towards the ground, realizing that she had missed something back during that scene. Gaara slouched back in his seat, and turned to look to the side.

Hikari coughed again, trying to lighten the scene. "Alrighty then, let's move onto the next question. This one if for Temari, from Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo. "Temari, is Shika-kun in your closet? Because I can't find him anywhere."

Temari looked alarmed at this question. "No! He's not in my closet!"

Kankuro looked at is sister, slightly confused. "Are you sure?"

Everyone saw a slight blush creep over Temari's face. "He's in my closet."

A silence fell over the room and the blush on Temari's face deepened. "Okay then." Haruko said, trying to break the silence. "Next question. This one is from…"

"Hold on a sec." Gaara sat up in his chair, looking around.

"Gaara, what is it?" Temari asked, reaching for her fan she had brought with her, which was sitting behind her chair.

"Do you hear that?"

"Ga-gaara, what are you talking about?" Kankuro stuttered, looking around frantically. "I don't hear anything."

"That's because you're talking too much." Gaara snapped. "Shut it."

Hikari started whispering into her collar again, her eyes darting from one place to another around the room.

Haruko looked amused, as she too was trying to find the source of the noise, even if she didn't hear it in the first place.

Then they heard it, soft at first, but then it grew into a resounding rumble around the room. "What's going on?" Hikari yelled into her collar.

There was static, and then the voice came back over her ear-piece. "We...we are trying to…something's up there…what?...help…kshdkh…" then she was met with all out static. Her expression dropped, and was replaced with sheer terror.

"Something's happening!" she said to Haruko. "We lost connection with everyone else!"

"What?" Haruko asked, her eyes widening.

"Someone attacked them!"

"Shut it!" Gaara snapped, looking upwards into the rafters. He stood up, Kankuro and Temari followed, all three of them staring up into the rafters.

Suddenly there was a loud bang, then some whispering up in the rafters. Gaara stopped moving, and then dropped his head. "Never mind." He muttered. "It's only the Konaha rookies." He dropped back into his seat again, and everything froze.

"What?"

"I told you, it's only those rookies. You know, that Uchiha kid and that loud one?"

"Naruto?" Kankuro asked. Gaara nodded, and if on cue, there was another loud bang, and 6 kids fell from up in the rafters. Most of them landed on their feet, except for one, who landed on his face.

"Ow." The one on his face muttered. "Sasuke, why'd you push me?"

"I didn't push you, dunce." One of the boys muttered, standing up. "You fell and pulled us all with you, great job."

Naruto got up, and brushed himself off. "I did NOT fall! You pushed me!"

The Uchiha glared at his teammate. "Shut it, you already blew our cover, so why not just shut up before you mess everything else up?"

"Humph." Naruto pouted, crossing his arms over his chest. "Who's to say I should listen to you?"

"Naruto." Sakura snapped, walking up beside Sasuke. "Just do as he says, before Kakashi-sensei finds out that we blew our mission."

"Ahem." Kiba coughed, trying to get team 7's attention. "Uh, guys?"

"What?" Naruto snapped.

"We are standing in the middle of a talk show."

Sakura looked around, so did Naruto and Sasuke. Her eyes grew double their normal size as she smiled weakly. "Sorry." She muttered.

"Oh no! It's fine!" Hikari cut in, looking around. "I…I'd just like to know what you did with our technical team."

Shino looked over to her, his face hidden by either his glasses or his collar. "We bound and gagged them." He told her nonchalantly.

"Oh…wait, you what?"

"Shino? Wait…I had a question for you in here…ah here!" Haruko said after shuffling through her notes. "I have a question for you, here, sit down. All of you," she turned to the side of the stage, "Could someone please bring out a few more chairs?"

Seconds later a woman, wearing all black clothing, came out carrying a couple of chairs. Another came from behind her carrying more. Soon there were enough chairs for everyone to sit down, and they did so. Sakura was still mumbling something along the lines of 'If Kakashi-sensei finds out, we are so dead.' But no one paid any attention to her.

Haruko nodded, and then looked back down to her notes. "Urm, yes, Kiba. Here we go…Shino; this one is also from Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo… Shino, Are you an alternate-reality-with-black-hair Vash?"

Shino blinked, and then shook his head. "No."

"Okay then…Naruto, this once again is from Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo…Naruto, why the hell aren't you with Hinata? And Hinata, why the hell aren't you with Naruto?"

Hinata squeaked, then blushed, placing her two fingers together. "Um…I-I-I…I'm…"

Naruto's eyes just grew about three sizes, and a slight pinkish tint could be seen on his own face. Scratching the back of his head, she smiled weakly. "Well…"

Kiba sighed and rolled his eyes. "If the questions are going to be this pointless, I don't see why we have to be here."

Haruko just stuck out her tongue at him, who also rebutted with this same action. "Okay, okay, here Kiba, I have a question for you." Hikari said, searching through her papers.

"Uhhh, this one is also from Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo, Kiba, if you had the Byakugan, would you use them how she thinks you would?"

Kiba snorted, crossing his arms over his chest. "If I had any idea how she thinks I would use them, I would answer that question. But if I did have them…"

Shino smacked him over the head. It was quick and short, but it sent the message. Kiba glared back to Shino, but shrugged it off.

"Ooooooooooooooooookay then," Haruko muttered, looking down at her notes. "This one if for Sasuke…hey, wait a second. How many questions did Kyo ask?"

A girl on the front row smirked, crossing her arms over her chest. She made eye-contact with Haruko, who shivered. "Uh, never mind. Sasuke, Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo would like to ask, is the inspiration behind your hair really a cockatoo?"

Naruto laughed so hard he fell out of his chair, and Sakura gasped. "No! Of course it isn't!" she shrieked! "I love Sasuke-kun's hair! I mean…I love him!"

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "No, it's not."

Hikari smiled slightly at Sakura trying to make up for her wording, then went on with the questions. "Sakura, this is the last one from Trenchcoatgirl-Kyo by the way, but Sakura, we'd all like to know. Is that your natural hair color?"

She smiled, flipping some of that pink hair over her shoulder. "Of course this is my natural color."

The stage was quiet after that, all looking surprised. Sakura looked around at everyone's shocked faces, and shrugged. "It is."

Kiba looked to the side and oh so not noticeably coughed "Liar."

Sakura bit her lip in attempt to hold her anger as Hikari looked back down to her notes. "Okie dokie then…next question. Kiba, PurpleMcCoy would like to know, how old is Akamaru?"

Kiba tapped his chin slightly, looking up trying to remember. "Uhhhh…I got him when I graduated from the academy, so whenever that was." He shrugged.

"And his favorite toy?"

"Uhhhh…I'm really not sure…" suddenly Kiba's coat started moving, first around his stomach, where a knot grew. Then that knot moved up his chest to the opening of his jacket, there, Akamaru's head popped out. "Let's ask him. Akamaru, what's your favorite toy?"

Akamaru conversed a bit with Kiba, who nodded, and then turned back to Hikari and Haruko. "He says that his favorite toy is… a red chewy bone? When the hack did you get that?" he looked down to his dog, who smiled. Shino sunk lower in his chair, and Haruko moved onto the next question.

Kiba smiled to his teammate right as Haruko turned to Naruto. "Naruto, PurpleMcCoy would also like to know which is better, Instant Raman or the one you buy at the Raman Stand?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes, and everyone sighed. Naruto, though, perked up and sat a little straighter in his seat. "Raman? Oh well, though the Instant Raman is good, it is always better to have the real stuff. And besides, there's always some kind of extra taste added when it is homemade." He nodded, smiling. "I personally like both, but the Raman stand is by far better than Instant." He stuck his arm out in front of him, his fingers in the shape of a V. "Raman is the best! Either way!"

Then, suddenly, he came tumbling foreword, and landed on his face. Jumping back up, his face showed that it was not an accident, and his yelling seconded that. "Sasuke! Why did you hit me?"

Sasuke rolled his eyes again, standing back up. "This is pointless, we are supposed to be on a mission, we can't be a part of the show." He turned back to team eight. "We are leaving, now."

Kiba nodded and stood up, followed by Shino, Hinata, and Sakura. Naruto frowned, crossing his arms over his chest. "Fine." He mumbled.

Haruko's eyes grew wider. "Wait!" she yelled, shuffling through her papers. "We have more questions!"

Sasuke turned back to her, about to reply, when there was a slight puff of smoke and a figure stood in front off all of them. He wore a Chunnin vest, a bored expression, and his hitai-ate over his left eye. His arms were crossed over his chest as he looked upon the two teams.

Naruto bit his lip, muttering a 'damn' as Kakashi shook his head. "So you all failed, I thought so. I should have come up with something more doable for you all.

"But…but…but Kakashi-sensei!" Sakura started. "It wasn't our fault! Naruto fell out of the rafters! We were fine until he fell!"

"I was pushed!"

Kakashi shook his head. "It doesn't matter. You all failed," he sighed, "at least there isn't any paperwork to file. Oh well, time to-"

A crashing sound came from the hosts as everyone's head turned that way. Hikari stared, wide-eyed at the overturned chair beside her, Haruko had apparently fallen backwards. But not seconds after everyone looked that way, she bounced up from behind the chair, smiling wildly.

"KAKASHI-SENSEI!" she screamed, bounding foreword. Due to the fact her back wan no longer up against the chair, everyone could see the large picture printed on her back. It was the same shinobi that she had bounded for, yelling his name.

Kakashi took a step back out of surprise, but shook his head. "You all failed, so it is time to end this talk show." He pulled something out of his pocket as Haruko attached to his leg. "Say goodbye everyone, we are leaving." He pressed the button on the remote he pulled out and the building rumbled.

"Uhhh…Kakashi-sensei, what the hell did you just do?" Hikari asked, looking upwards towards the noise.

He shrugged. "I activated a few bombs actually, this place should be tumbling down in a few moments." He raised his hand up to his forehead, giving some kind of demented salute. "Get out alive and I might forgive you all for failing." His one eyes showed signs as though he was smiling. "Have fun."

With that the shinobi disappeared, all left in his place was one sad fangirl. "He's gone…" she sniffed. "And I wasn't able to ask him how he ate with his mask."

Sasuke shook his head. "The world may never know…but now it's time to go." He grabbed onto Sakura's collar and poofed away. Followed by three more poofs of Kiba, Shino, and Hinata leaving. Naruto looked up to the ceiling, and waited until part of it fell onto his face before disappearing himself.

Hikari held her clipboard over her head as she jumped up. "I'm sorry everyone, we will have to cut this interview short due to the fact…WE ALL ARE GOING TO DIE! RUN!"

Kankuro heard the screams of the audience as more of the ceiling caved in and looked over to Gaara, who was staring down at his shoes. "Uhhh…Gaara-san? Are we going to leave?"

Gaara rolled his eyes, standing up. "Let's go." He muttered, placing his hands in the needed positions before poofing off himself. Temari shook her head, muttering something about 'a large waste of time', before doing the same. Kankuro, after nearly missing a large piece of concrete which came from over head smiled towards the hosts and left.

Haruko looked over the seats as pieces of the ceiling and metal bars fell around her. "And this concludes our first chapter of 'Interview with a Puppet Master'. Feel free to leave us some more questions to ask our cast next time."

"IF THERE IS A NEXT TIME!" Hikari screamed hysterically, running around in circles, trying to avoid the falling ceiling. "IF WE CAN GET OUT OF HERE!"

Haruko sighed and took hold of Hikari's risks, poofing away herself.

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