Author's Note: Wow two chapters in a row and I think there might be another one coming this week. A woman's worth is outlined but I need to do some other stuff to it so I might just do another chapter of Unbreakable. Please review this chapter and the one before it if you haven't. This one was an awesome one to write. Big thanks to Cari who beta, to Cathy who helped me when I had a mini meltdown last night thinking it sucked. To Mags, to Ella, to everyone who read it and loved it. This is for a special friend though to Ange. Love u slut.
Chapter 11
Somewhere only we know.
Haley slipped on her favorite Michael Kors, baby blue cashmere sweater as she walked down the stairs and made her way into the sunny kitchen. It was a beautiful California morning, she thought to herself, looking out the window as she poured two cups of steaming coffee into mugs. She walked out the huge glass doors that led to the terrace and gazed out at the scene that surrounded her; the wild flowers that bordered the wooden steps that led to the private beach, the white sand, the sea gulls that were flying above in the sky, and the sparkling blue ocean … it was an amazing view. She closed her eyes as the warm sun beat against her face and inhaled the salty sea air as she walked down the wooden steps, barefoot, through the sand and sat down a few feet away from the shore, and continued to gaze out at the ocean. Feeling a familiar hand on her shoulder, she broke out in a smile.
"How was your jog?" she asked as he sat down next to her and took the cup from her hand.
"Great. I love this place. I love waking up and jogging on the beach. There's no one around, no paparazzi, no fans. It's just me and the ocean. I'm actually thinking of making an offer, it's the perfect house for me."
"It's amazing, and so very peaceful. I can definitely see you here."
"Yeah me too," Jake smiled. "Now, may I ask what has the great superstar, multiple award winning artist up so early? Besides bringing me my coffee, which I don't mind at all by the way," Jake teased as he took a sip of the warm liquid.
"I couldn't sleep," she answered him.
"And here I thought you were up early because you wanted to spend some alone time with me. It's too quiet, city girl. You miss the hustle and bustle of city life."
Haley started laughing. "You know me too well, I love the beach but I've grown so accustomed to New York. The honking, the rushing about, the noise; its like a lullaby. Too much peace makes me nervous."
"And I'm the complete opposite. More than a week in New York City and I break out in hives. Maybe that's the reason we broke up," Jake teased.
"There were many reasons why we broke up, that one was one of them. One of the many."
"Ouch. Damn Haley, you're harsh! Hurt my feelings why don't you?" He clutched his chest jokingly.
"Shut up Jake," Haley said as she playfully swatted his chest a little harder than she meant to.
"Ouch, watch it there Tyson. I know all your moves, I got you into kickboxing remember? And you've got a hell of a left hook! Come on, let's take a walk, and walk off some of that aggression. Besides its going to get crazy here later, I need a little peace, before the madness begins."
"Alright!" she answered as she took Jake's extended hand, and he pulled her up.
The two old lovers walked down the beach in silence holding hands. After a few minutes, Jake spoke.
"You remember the first real vacation I took you on?" he asked her.
"Are you kidding?" Haley asked him in surprise. "I don't think I will ever forget that vacation, you jerk! We'd only been together a few months, and I was touring, you were making that action movie. We only had a few weekends here and there, and every time we tried to go anywhere, the paparazzi would be all over us! Ugh what a nightmare…"
"Of course the paparazzi were all over us!" Jake laughed as he gave her a sly grin. "Because you were with the sexiest man alive…"
"Ugh, your ego, Jake, it never ceases to amaze me how big it is," Haley smiled up at him, as the memories of that first summer together resurfaced in her mind. "We both had part of the summer off," she continued. "And for weeks you had been telling me about this fabulous vacation you had planned for us, somewhere away from the craziness. I thought you were going to take me somewhere luxurious like the south of France, or Fiji, so I went out and bought all these cute little sun dresses, bikinis, cover ups, and sandals. I was so excited, well imagine my surprise when instead of lying on a beach in the south of France we ended up in an old, run down cabin in Maine!"
"It wasn't that bad…"
"It smelled like wet dog, there was no electricity, no hot water, it had a leaky roof, the shower was outside … oh and it was in the middle of nowhere!"
"Okay fine, it was a dump!" Jake chuckled. "But I seem to remember that you once told me that you loved the time we spend there."
"Me!" Haley said acting surprised. "I never said that!"
"Yes you did, you told me so. You said it was one of the best moments of your life, don't try to deny it. I know everything about you, Haley James. I have a very long and detailed memory, I forget nothing, I remember all, so don't bullshit me."
"Okay, okay I'll admit it; it was an amazing week, despite having to rough it. It was kind of nice playing house together."
"That was the week we decided to move in together. Chris had a fit, do you remember that?"
"How could I forget? He hit the roof! He never thought the night he introduced us at that party that we would amount to anything. He wanted me to concentrate on my career and I shocked him by wanting to play house with the biggest playboy in Hollywood."
"He told us we wouldn't last a month, and we proved him wrong."
"Yeah we did," Haley smiled softly. "Five years. You know, the other night I thought about that cabin. I remember the night you built the fire, we popped some popcorn, and I just lay in your arms."
"I played with your hair…" Jake softly whispered. "I remember that night; I told you I loved you that night."
"Yes you did, and I realized I loved you that night too. Do you want to know the funny thing though? That night in the cabin away from everything and everyone, I felt this inner peace that I've only felt a few other times in my crazy life. At that cabin I was just plain old Haley."
"Sweetheart, one thing you're not is plain or old," Jake said before silence stretched between them. They continued to walk along the shore, enjoying the waves crashing against their feet. Finally, he spoke. "I'm glad you're here. I knew you would come but a small part of me was worried you wouldn't come."
"I wouldn't have missed it, no matter what; you know I would have cleared my schedule."
"That's not what I meant, I mean this. Today. It's got to be a bit weird for you."
"I thrive on weird! Some of my biggest hits have been written about weird situations. What about you? How are you feeling? Nervous?"
"Can you believe I'm not at all? You'd think that I would be, but I'm not. I'm more anxious actually, I want to do it and I've waited a long time for this," he sighed. "But enough about me. You got in yesterday and we haven't been able to talk, so tell me what's going on in your world? You're getting a bit too serious, very unlike you."
"Nothing big. I start the 'Illusions' campaign on Monday, so for the next six months I'm going to be doing add campaigns. The press junket doesn't start till November, I have a few scripts to read but besides that everything is going to be pretty quiet and calm. So I'm going to be living a life of leisure, no music for awhile."
"And you're happy about this?" Jake asked her.
"Yes, of course. I need this time off; everything was getting so hectic. I should have done this years ago! A vacation from music and from the hectic touring schedule is just what I need."
"Can I ask you a question?' Jake asked her as she sat down on the sand, and wrapped her arms tight around her knees.
"Sure," she answered him as he sat down next to her.
"Are you buying your own crap?"
"Excuse me!"
"You heard me, are you buying your own crap? I've known you for years, Haley. I've lived with you, I've made love to you. I know everything about you, every scar, every dream, and every thought. And I know that you are miserable. You love music. You live, breath and sleep it. You carry a big notebook with you to write down lyrics. Not once in ten years have you not written music; you even hum in your sleep! So imagine my surprise when I turn on Oprah and I hear you're taking time off? You, the workaholic, that wrote a song during not one but two of my movie premieres, so don't bullshit me. I know you too well."
"I'm fine, Jake."
"No you're not! Tell me what's going on! Because I know something is up. I know something is bothering you, just like I know when Peyton is about to eat a big stack of pancakes with way too much syrup, and I know something is up with Brooke because she looks like she hasn't slept in days. Seriously though Hales," Jake said as he pulled Haley closer to him. "I know something is up."
"You're not going to let this go are you? I know you too, and I know you're not going to let it go because we're the same. I did this to Brooke the other day."
"So tell me, Queenie," he pleaded, using his nickname for Haley. "Tell me what's going on with you. We have plenty of time. Why all these deep thoughts about peace and crap?"
"Have you ever taken stock of your life?" she asked him. " A real good look at everything that you've done, have, and lost, because I have. The last few months after the movie wrapped up, I started working on my next album and there was nothing."
"What do you mean?'
"I mean the usual inspiration wasn't there. For the first time I didn't have note in my head, I didn't have the lyrics or the sound like I usually do. I thought it was a fluke, that it was stress, so I went home for a bit, you know being home with my mom always relaxes me, but nothing changed."
"Hales, is that it?"
"Shut up, Jake. You wanted to know what was up, so let me tell you. I'm actually feeling better telling you… so shut up and listen."
"Okay! Damn, I swear you get pushier with age. Continue."
"Forget it," Haley said as she attempted to stand up only to be pushed down by Jake.
"Stop Hales, come on. Look you have my full attention, so tell me. I'm worried about you, I've been so busy I meant to … look there's no excuse I should have been on a plane to see you after the Oprah thing, so come on Hales, tell me. What's wrong? What can I do to make it better? What's going on with your music?"
"You're sweet Jake, but today is not day to talk like this, and frankly it's not your job to take care of me anymore. I love you for it though."
"I love you too and you would do the same for me," Jake said softly as he looked at the woman who had given him some of the best memories of his life. He stared at her as she watch the waves hit the shore, and wondered why, despite the love they had felt for each other, they hadn't made it work. The falling in love had been so easy, but the staying in love had been the hard part. It had taken him years to figure it out, but in the end he had and he had realized that no matter what, he would always love Haley, he just wasn't in love her. Once upon a time he had loved her, loved her more than anyone, and it had practically killed him when she had left him. But he had gotten over it, they had become best friends, and he had fallen in love again, something he thought would never happen, but it did. Out of the blue a woman walked into his life, turned it upside down, and made him fall head over heels in love with her.
"I know."
"So tell me. Talk to me, I'm worried about you. Look, it's just us, no one else, just us. You want me back don't you?" Jake asked her seriously.
"Oh God, Jake no! I mean I love you, but uhh …"
"You're still so fucking gullible! I swear, it must be a Southern thing."
"You ass, sometimes I wonder how I could have been with you for so long and how I didn't kill you!"
"Because you loved me, and I have a cute ass. But seriously, do you regret us, the years we spend together?"
"No I don't regret us," Haley sighed. "I regret a lot of things not us. You taught me a lot and you made me very happy."
"I'm glad," he said. "Now tell me what's going on."
"I've lost it."
"Lost what?"
"I've lost the sound. The music. It's not there anymore. I sit in front of the piano, tapping the keys but there's nothing. No song ideas. My mind is blank and so is my notebook."
"It happens sometimes, Hales. To everyone. Even Billy Joel has an off day."
"Yeah an off day," Haley said as she smiled up at him. "But has he ever had an off six months? Jake, I'm talking nothing, not even a note. I thought I needed some time off but it didn't get any better. I started feeling restless, like the walls were closing in around me. That's when I started to walk through my apartment at night in the dark, thinking about everything that's has happen to me. I started wondering what if I hadn't gotten up on that stage that night at Tric, would I be what I am now? What if I never met Chris or if I had pursued designing instead of singing, what would my life be like?"
"Music is part of you Hales; it's always been part of you. Even if Chris Keller hadn't seen you sing that night, it would have found you. It's the love of your life, and you know it."
"I love it, you're right about that. When I get on that stage I become someone else. I do love it, there is no doubt in my mind about that, but what have I sacrificed for it? Look at me Jake, take a hard long look. I am Haley James, I have the Grammies, I have the Oscar, the money all my heart has never desired but am I truly happy?"
"I can't answer that, sweetheart. But I can tell you that without it you would be miserable."
Haley said nothing as she stared out into the ocean, and Jake didn't push. He knew there was more troubling her but he also knew how she was and how quickly she would shut down if she was pushed.
"There is a stop in the add campaign itinerary in Tuscany. Four day shoot," she whispered not meeting his eyes.
"Oh Hales…" Jake said understanding a bit more about what was going on with her. "I'm sure that if you say something they can change it."
"They can. In my contract, I have a clause that says I have final say in the campaign destinations."
"Good. It will be easy to get out of it then."
"I'm going."
"What? Haley…" Jake murmured, stunned.
"Its time. The last few weeks I have been thinking of my life and I need to do this. I need to see …" Haley's stop talking as her eyes started to tear. "I would give it up, without giving it a second thought if I could have one more day with…I can't even now after all these years say her name without crying."
"Bess," Jake muttered. "I can still remember the day we picked her name out. Bess Christina."
"After your mother and Chris Keller."
"A mixture of the best of both of us. She would have had your voice, my eyes, your hair … the perfection combination. I can still remember the first time I saw her on the ultra sound screen, her little heart beating."
"Oh God Jake, I'm sorry. I shouldn't do this not today. You're getting married and …"
"No! Look, Hales, Bess was our child and there is not a day, an hour, a minute I don't think about her. She was our daughter, a baby we created out of our love, a baby we both wanted that was taken away. No matter what happens in my life, I will never forget her. I know how much losing her hurt you. It practically killed me; I know what you mean about inner peace. It took me a long time to find it after Bess, but you will find it, I promise you that. I think going to Tuscany might be the start, in fact I know it will. When is the shoot?"
"Right now it's scheduled for April."
"Good, I'm free. I'll go with you."
"Jake you don't have to. Besides you're going to have your hands full…"
"I'm going with you, that's it, end of discussion."
"Jake, why?" Haley asked him, needing to hear some sort of explanation, an answer for the question that kept her up every night.
"I don't know, I wish I did. I could never explain why she was taken away from us, our sweet, perfect baby girl."
"All my money, my fame, the life I have is nothing, it doesn't matter, but my daughter…God, life is so unfair. If I knew then what I know now …" she trailed off.
"It wouldn't have changed a thing Hales, and you have to stop blaming yourself. It wasn't your fault. Life is life, things happen, good and bad. You did nothing wrong and neither did I. Life is unfair but there is no turning back. Haley, you know no matter what happens or how many children I have, Bess is and will always be my first child. A child I wanted and loved."
"I know, Jake. You don't have to do this, and you don't have to come, I can do this myself."
"I want to. I love you, Haley and I will always love you no matter what. I don't want you to go back there alone. We were both there together from the start until the end."
"Thank you, Jake. Thank you for everything, and for letting me vent."
"Enough sadness," Jake whispered as he climbed to his feet. "Come on, get up, let's go! I'm getting married today. I'm off the market for good!"
"Thank God," Haley said laughingly as Jake pulled her up. "And who are you kidding, you've been off the market since the day you two started shacking up!"
"Oh, shut up," Jake interrupted. "You know it might do you some good if maybe you would let someone into your heart, maybe fall in love again, have a relationship."
"Oh quit it! You were more than enough for me, and I don't do relationships. Now come on, I have to go help get the bride ready."
"Fine," he answered her. "But one other thing."
"What?" she asked him and before she could even blink Jake pulled her into a deep kiss.
"What the hell was that for?" Haley asked him when he pulled away from her.
"Proof, Hales. Just making sure there was nothing there. I was right. Nothing there, I can get married! Come on, lets go, my bride awaits!"
"You're a little kid, you know that?" Haley said as she watched him run back towards the house.
"Come on Hales, I bet you I can beat you."
"A little kid," Haley muttered under her breath as she ran after him.
That Afternoon….
"You look amazing," Brooke said breathlessly. "I love weddings."
"I look like a pig!" Peyton answered her best friend who was standing in front of her with a huge smile on her face. "And if you love weddings so much why am I the one who's getting married, not you? You should be the one taking the plunge."
"Shut up, today is not the day to talk about me and my romantic life. Please don't start, I don't want to hear about online dating, blind dates, or anything like that."
"Fine then, let's talk about your sex life, you've been holding out on me Davis. I heard all about your wicked little night with a certain Scott…and I want details!"
"Haley! You told me you wouldn't tell!"
"She guessed," Haley said in an innocent voice. "It's the pregnancy. I swear the girl is physic."
"Yeah sure she is, a regular fortune teller," Brooke said in an annoyed voice. "I had sex, I slept with Lucas Scott. There you got all the gory details now can we finish getting you ready?"
Neither Haley nor Peyton said a word; they just stood still and stared at the brunette in front of them, and started laughing.
"Whatever!" Brooke said throwing her hands up in the air. "Go head, have your fun, who cares if I'm mortified? Who cares if I have to see this guy for the next few months, who cares about me?"
"Oh Brookie, chill out," Haley said as she walked over to her friend and gave her a hug.
"Yeah, Brooke chill out, so you slept with Lucas Scott. It's not that big of a deal, I mean he has slept his way through New York, you aren't the first or the last."
"Peyton!" Haley exclaimed. "He's my friend! Besides, I think he would be great for Brooke…"
"Oh God ,stop!" Brooke cried as she wrung her hands. "I don't want to talk about this, now or ever. The only thing I want to do is get you married, Peyton. Can we just get your ass married and stop talking about me and Lucas Scott?"
"So there is a you and Lucas Scott," Peyton said in a teasing voice as she stared at her reflection in the mirror. "God I look fat! Look at me, its such a pretty dress too! Donna Karen is a genius, too bad she is wasting it on my fat ass."
"Oh stop, you look like a normal pregnant woman who is getting married," Haley said as she fixed the flowers in Peyton's hair.
"I look like a stuffed pig in Donna Karen! But hell no one is going to see me except you guys, and well, Jake," she said as she fixed the pink sash on her gown.
"And the priest."
"I forgot about him! Does he have to be here?"
"Peyton!" Haley said, laughing. "He has to marry you. You look beautiful. The empire gown was a great choice, and your hair is beautiful curly and up."
"Whatever, Miss-Size-Two. I don't even know why we have to do this. I mean, it's me! I don't believe in weddings, marriage to me is just a piece of paper. I would have been perfectly content living together."
"Oh no not this rant again," Brooke said, rolling her eyes. "He knocked you up and wants to marry you. He is an amazing guy besides you love him, right?"
"Yes despite trying not to countless times, I do love the jerk."
"Of course you do, so can we go Peyton? Can we get you married already? You've been staring at your self for twenty minutes, you're not getting skinner…"
"You're lucky I love you. Alright lets get this show on the road, there's cake after, and I'm staving."
"That baby is going to weigh a million pounds," Brooke whispered to Haley as they followed Peyton out. "You should have seen her eating breakfast this morning; I've never seen someone eat so much."
"Wait!" Peyton said before she opened the door leading to the terrace where Jake was waiting for her.
"Not again, Peyton! It looks fine!" Brooke said. "And no you can't have a snack, you've eaten enough."
Peyton ignored Brooke's comment, "No look, Haley, I just want to ask you are you sure…"
"That you don't look like a whale? I'm sure…"
"No about this, me and Jake, I mean…"
"I'm fine, we've been over this a million times. I love you and I love Jake. You two belong together. Now can you please get married already? Jake looks like he is going to throw up, so does the priest. It's hot out."
"I just want to make sure, okay? I don't want this to turn out like when you said yeah go head, Pey, you can have my Kate Spade bag, and then one day you said you wanted it back," Peyton said to Haley jokingly as she flashed a big smile at her,.
"Peyton!" Haley said giggling as she followed Peyton out the door. "Just marry him already. And by the way, I so understand why you two work. Both of you have the weirdest sense of humor."
Ten minutes later, Haley stood next to Brooke and watched as her best friend married the man she once thought was the love of her life. She stared at them, their faces glowing with happiness, holding hands as they recited their vows. It was beautiful, they were beautiful and Haley was happy. Two people who she loved were getting married and having a child, and she was happy for them. There were no feelings of what ifs in regards to Jake. Peyton was his soul mate, the woman who he was destined to be with, and she knew that. As she watched him, she knew she would never forget what she and Jake had shared or their child, but the Jaley as the press called them was over, and Jake had finally found happiness at last.
New York City
Nathan stared at the figures displayed on his lap top and felt a surge of rage begin to rise throughout his body. It wasn't possible, there had to be some sort of mistake! Once more, he punched in the figures and added them all up, hoping he had miscalculated, but the same number appeared. It wasn't possible, they were way over budget, and the campaign was costing three times more than it was originally supposed to. He stood up and walked over to the bar and poured himself a whiskey. He had to do something; he thought to himself. He had to stop it before they went bankrupt. For a brief moment he toyed with the idea of going to his mother, of showing her how out of hand the situation had gotten. Maybe if she saw the spreadsheets, she would realize he was right, but he knew it was hopeless. When Karen Hargrove made up her mind, no one could change it, and Nathan knew what she would say to him anyway. You have to spend money to make money.
Spending money was one thing but spending $15 million on a campaign was ludicrous. He walked back to his desk and read over the itinerary.
"Spain, Italy, what the fuck? Is Lucas out of his mind…" he muttered out loud. He couldn't understand it, there was no need to do four add spreads in different parts of the world, it was completely unnecessary. The whole thing had gotten out of control, and he'd known the minute his mother had had the brilliant idea to make Haley James the face of Illusions that it would all blow up in their faces. What he couldn't understand was why he was the only one who realized that. Everyone else fawned all over her, talking about how great she was, the amount of exposure she would bring the company, but was there any proof? Could anyone show him, on paper, that Haley James' face would triple their profits? She was just some actress / singer with a pretty face. There was nothing remarkable about her, she was the same as the other models they had considered, the only think that made her stand out was the fact that she had just won an Oscar for best song and a couple of Grammies. But she was trouble, that much he knew. The minute he met her, his greatest fears had been confirmed. He knew that the only way to save his mother's company was to get her out of the contract, but the question was how? That was the hard part, he thought to himself as he walked over to the phone in his home office, which was ringing.
"Hello!" he said as he identified the caller on the other end. "Mike, I was going to call you tonight. Tell me you have something, anything."
A big smile broke out on his face as he listened to the private detective talk.
"Are you kidding me?" Nathan said as he jumped out of his chair. "How bad are they?"
Once again he listened intently to the voice on the other end of the phone as his heart started beating faster and faster. "No, don't bother I'll take your word for it. Release them to the media. Make sure there is no way they can trace it back at me. Good, I'll transfer the money into your account. Thank you, you have no idea what this means."
Nathan hung up the phone and sat back in his chair. He smiled. She was done. Haley James was done. She would be out of his life, the campaign and he had won, just like he had known he would.
"Bye-bye diva!" he said out loud as a big smile broke out on his face.
