Hello! Sorry that this one is on the shorter side. I know some of you are eager for future Leo to appear, and I want to go ahead and say that he will appear a few chapters from now. I'm sorry if that brings any disappointment. I thought it was better to go ahead and say it now. I still hope you're enjoying it so far!
Leo
"Leonardo, nani ga mondaidesu ka?" Master Splinter asked, sitting cross-legged before our tree in the dojo.
I sat on my knees across him, tapping my fingers anxiously. "You know what's wrong, Sensei. The mission didn't go as planned tonight, and I don't know what to do with Mikey."
Sensei stroked his facial hair as I spoke with a sense of calm I wish I had across his face. "Surely, that was not the full trigger of your outburst at your youngest brother tonight."
My eyes widened a bit, even though I've learned to stop being surprised by my father's incredible insight. He knew something was eating me from the inside lately. How, I wasn't so sure.
"Tell me what is troubling you, chōnan," Sensei implored.
I clenched my fist atop my knees, wondering how to let it out. "I'm not sure, Father. I've had this feeling since this morning, a feeling I can't really describe just yet. It's like something is swirling in my stomach."
"You as well, hm?" Master Splinter asked, and I looked up at him in surprise. "I sense something coming, my son. You must be prepared for anything and lead your brothers with caution. Much like you, I am unable to pinpoint this feeling."
"Hai, Sensei." I lowered my head. "I didn't want anything to go wrong tonight, and when Mikey just… you know, I got anxious."
"Yes, Michelangelo's unique mind has appeared to be taking over him as of late. I see your frustration, Leonardo. Curiosity killed the cat." I squeezed my eyes shut at the thought of Mikey getting himself killed. A tightness in my chest forced me to inhale sharply. "But curiosity is a beautiful thing; it unlocks our potential and allows us to see a different side of the universe. How do you think Donatello builds such wonderful inventions?"
"My apologizes, Sensei, but where are you going with this?" I asked cautiously.
"As leader, you must help Michelangelo separate his mind's good and bad curiosities. Steer him away from his wanderings before he gets hurt. Telling him that he is a 'screw-up' will not alleviate the turmoil he must be facing in his mind."
I recoiled at the last sentence, remembering my little brother's face after I called him that. It was so below me as a leader and big brother to say something so hurtful. My stomach lurched as I recalled the look he gave me when I knocked him over the head, the face of genuine bewilderment at my actions. To think I let my own anxiety overcome my emotions tonight dismayed me.
"I know, Sensei. I will do what I can," I said with a bow.
Mikey
I lay on my bed, fingering an action finger but not really paying attention to it. Still, it felt good to hold something as I gathered my scattered thoughts. Every time I become sad, it's like my thoughts go in different directions like autumn leaves in the wind. Sometimes it felt like my brain was the tree, and the leaves were my thoughts. When a thought disappeared so quickly from me, it's like when the leaves decay and blow away before I could catch them. I felt as if I was desperately trying to rake them together at the bottom of the tree but to no avail. There were just too many…
My brothers' minds must be like full, green trees with so many leaves intact. I pictured Sensei's as a cherry blossom tree, blooming with his never-ending wisdom. I was so jealous of them all, wishing I could keep my thoughts in bloom like them.
They were all thriving in the springtime. If only there was some way I could escape autumn. It wasn't fair.
Would my brothers be prouder if I completely changed, didn't talk with exclamation points anymore, belch in their faces, or ruined missions?
Maybe if I wasn't around at all…
I suddenly spotted a shadow looming in front of my door from the corner of my eye, and it was Leo's shape.
"Hey, Mikey, are you awake? I want to talk," he said calmly.
Hearing his voice brought back the anger I felt during our argument, and I took a cleansing breath, just as I had taught my friend Leatherhead.
"I don't need another lecture, bro," I rejected, pulling my knees to my chest.
"I'm not here to lecture you, I promise. Please?"
"Whatever," I grumbled.
Leo took that as permission to come in. He held back a grimace at the empty pizza boxes strewn about the floor and focused on me with a frown. After standing there awkwardly, he shuffled over and sat next to me on my bed, tapping his fingers on his knees. Being the observant little brother that I was, I knew that that meant he wanted something off his chest.
"Listen, I know we already apologized in front of Sensei, but I wanted to apologize again," Leo started.
"You don't have to, bro," I said.
Leo raised a hand to stop me. "Let me have this. Raph never wants to hear my apologies and goes about life like we didn't almost kill each other, and I don't want that to happen between you and me as well." I shrugged, letting him continue. "I've been under a lot of stress lately, but that's no excuse to snap at you like I did or… hit you."
"But, you had a right to. I'm nothing but a screw-up," I said, pulling myself even closer.
Leo nudged my shoulder. "Come on, I didn't mean that. You're just as special as the rest of us."
"How can I be special when I can't think as fast as Donnie, punch harder than Raph or…" I stopped myself as I felt tears lining my eyes, burrowing my face in my knees. "I try to act and think like you guys, but my brain just doesn't let me."
I felt Leo shift next to me like he was going to embrace me or something, but it never came, almost as if he hesitated; it wasn't important enough for me to look in his direction. Instead, a warm hand clutched my shoulder.
"Mikey, if we were all the same, that just wouldn't be natural, now would it?" Leo asked.
I shrugged his hand off, scooting around, so my shell faced him instead. Clasping my legs even tighter, I released a shaky breath, my shoulders trembling. I was so vulnerable, which was nothing new to my brothers. Out of all of us, I was the most emotional, the one never afraid to cry or give hugs. Yet this was a side of me I didn't want Leo to ever see: the side of me that doubted myself. I liked my confident self, who skateboarded, danced, and belted battle cries to feel braver, the one my brothers saw the most. The need to summon that half of me was so strong, but I was too weak.
"Mikey…" Leo said softly. "You just need to work on your ability to focus. I want to help you."
I perked a little. "Really?"
"Of course." Leo moved himself, sitting in front of me with his hands on my shoulders. He squeezed them, speaking to me through touch like he always did. He was saying, listen. "Because you're my family. Do you trust me?"
I finally looked up and reacquainted with his deep, ocean blue eyes through my teary ones, catching a soft grin on his face. "Yes. Thanks, Leo."
"To make it up to you, how about I bake you a jelly bean and anchovy pizza?" he asked.
My eyes widened as I recalled how he'd messed up the kitchen in the past just making toast, and I flinched, waving my hands before him. "No! That's okay, bro. How about I make it instead?"
Leo's soft grin broadened. Patting me on the head, he said, "There's my otōto."
There was a sense of fluttering in my stomach at the sound of that, transporting me back to when we were little, when he would succumb to my little-brother powers and let me sleep in bed with him when I was scared. Was it possible that my mojo was back? Did I ever really lose it?
I suddenly wrapped my arms around my big brother, though I couldn't recall giving my body permission—my hugs were typically spontaneous. Leo stiffened, not returning the gesture but not rejecting it at the same time. He instead patted my shell.
"Hey, you guys, get in here!" came Donnie's voice from his lab.
Leo and I shared a look before bounding off my bed and rushing to Donnie's lab. Raph beat us there from his position in the pit of the common room.
"What is it, Donnie?" Leo asked seriously.
"I was checking in on my spy roach, and I overheard Fish Face and Rahzar talking," Donnie said, pausing to type away on his computer.
"Well, what did they say?" Raph asked impatiently.
"It's about Tiger Claw. He's sailing into the southern docks tomorrow night at midnight with some kind of powerful weapon in tow," Donnie continued.
"Did you say sailing?" Leo asked.
My immediate older brother only nodded seriously. "He's coming all the way from Japan."
"So, that's where the kitty's been," I muttered thoughtfully.
"Do you know what kind of weapon he's bringing?" Leo questioned, placing his elbows on the back of Donnie's chair and eyeing his computer.
"They only said that it was powerful, and Tiger Claw will be delivering it to the Shredder once he's in town," Donnie replied with a shrug.
"I don't know what this weapon even is, but anything powerful in Shredder's possession has got to be bad," Raph claimed.
"Yeah, we should totally, like, see what that weapon's about, yo," I piped in enthusiastically, gaining looks from my brothers. "…right?"
"Right!" they agreed in unison, smirks spreading.
Leo pressed his fists together. "Alright, ninjas. Here's what we're going to do."
