She was nervous to say the least. The word that actually summed up her emotions would be terrified. She was about to ask a question that she already knew the answer to, but was afraid of how to ask it. She felt, in her heart, that he wouldn't hesitate to comply with her request, but just how do you ask your working partner to be the father of your child?
She laughed inwardly at the different scenarios that past through her mind.
"Hey, Mulder, I have a question for ya. How would you like to be a father?" No.
"Hey, how would you like to donate sperm to a good cause?" No.
She sighed heavily and tried to concentrate on a serious presentation. Fortunately the comfortable silence of her apartment was enough to keep her mind where it should be. However, that silence was shattered by a knocking on the door.
She got up, knowing instantly who was behind the door. She had called him over almost an hour ago. He had paper work to finish at work and get to Kersh by noon and then promised that he would be right over. She pulled open the door and was greeted with his lopsided grin covering his concern for her. She smiled slightly.
"Hey, I thought about bringing over some beers and Caddyshack but I didn't think that would have gone over well." He joked.
"I think that is a movie best viewed at your apartment." She shot back as she moved allowing him entrance. She sat back on the couch and watched him close the door and follow her. He sat down next to her, his arm draped over the back of the couch. She smiled to herself. He looked like he belonged there all his life.
"So what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?" He asked. Her sigh echoed off the walls. She had hoped that he wouldn't jump right into business.
"Well, you remember last week when you told me you found my ova and had them examined?" He only nodded, choosing to remain silent and let her continue. "Well, I just couldn't believe that that was it, they were there but there was nothing left of them. I needed to find out for myself. I had my doctor look at them and..." she smiled widely. "They are viable." Mulder's expression was opposite hers. His was complete and utter shock and confusion.
"How can you be sure? I had the test run twice and was told no. Are you sure the doctor..." He trailed off. He was excited for her but doubt and worry clouded his eyes.
"He confirmed and reconfirmed the tests and yes, there is a chance that I could conceive a child with them." Her smile faded.
"What is it?" He placed his hand under her chin when she looked away, forcing her to meet his gaze.
"Well, basic sex education states and you need a man and a woman to make a baby." She grinned. "I'm just worried about who the father would be if I went to one of those sperm banks." Mulder nodded. His mind told him what she was getting at before she spoke the words.
"I want to know the person that will be the father of my child. I can't have that with an anonymous donation. I guess, that's why I was hoping that you..." she trailed off as her face turned a burning red color.
"You want me to be the father..." He finished for her.
"I know it is a lot to ask and I understand if you don't want to take on the responsibility. I wouldn't expect anything out of you and you know that. I trust you and respect you with everything I am and I know that you would make a great father." She explained. He looked past her, his mind a thousand miles away. Silence filled the room again and she felt as though he had never arrived, that she was seeing this in her mind. Finally, he broke the silence.
"I need some time." He said quickly and stood up, moving to the door. Before she could respond he had left her apartment and regret instantly filled her heart.
Four hours later Scully was moving about her apartment trying her hardest to keep busy. She just wanted to keep her mind off the events of today. She was devastated that he reacted the way he did. She was terrified that she had ruined everything they had.
She just finished dusting the bathroom when she heard the familiar rapping on her front door. Eagerly, she made her way over and let him in.
"Hi." She whispered.
"Hi."
She pulled the door back. "Come on in." She looked down as he entered and then closed the door.
"Thanks." Was his simple response.
"Can I take your coat?" She was hoping to keep things light but the tension unbearable.
"No, I can't stay. I've got to get back to the office for a while."
"Obviously you've had some time to think about my request." She dared. She wanted to get it out in the open. No holds bar. Not anymore.
"It's... it's not something that I get asked to do every day. But I am absolutely flattered. No, honestly." He smiled widely. She saw the sincerity in his eyes and heard it in his voice. He was flattered, but...
"Okay, if... if you're trying to politely say 'no', it's okay. I understand." She looked away, the pain becoming to much. She was losing her last chance at a family. She could feel it slipping away.
"See what's weird is... this sounds, and this sounds really weird, I know, but I just wouldn't want this to come between us." She felt like laughing. Of course it would. It would change things for them and turn their worlds around. They would be parents. But she was worried too.
"Yeah. I know... I understand. I do."
"Well... the answer is 'yes'." Her head shot up to meet his eyes and she felt like her heart had stopped beating. 'Yes' She didn't know what to say. Professionalism saves the day.
"Well, I'll call Dr Parenti and... I assume that he'll want to meet you and go through the... the donor procedure." He laughed slightly.
"At that part, I'm a pro." They both laughed together as the tension evaporated.
"I can't tell you what this means to me, Mulder." She was on the verge of tears.
"Hey," He put his hand on her cheek and stopped a tear from falling down her face. "It means just as much to me." She was in awe at the man before her. He leaned over and kissed her forehead gently. Before pulling back he whispered, "It's what I have wanted for you, for us, since Emily..." He felt tears stinging his own eyes.
"Me too." She responded.
"I better get back. We'll talk more later." She nodded. Doubt filling her eyes at the thought of Emily's death. He picked up on it instantly. "Have faith. It will work." She forced a smile as he turned and left her apartment.
Outside her door, he stood against the wall, his mind in another world. Images of them together, with a child flooded his mind and for once in his life, his images were demon free. It was perfect. It was meant to be.
