The Magical tale of the Mischievous Malfoys
Disclaimer: You know the drill. Mhm, mhm, don't own Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione… BUT I DO OWN THEIR PERSONALITY QUIRKS IN MY STORY! So there. Don't own Avenue Q either. Wish I did… OR The Royal Tenenbaums. Arrrrr.
Gracias to Megan, my only reviewer. And my best friend. BUT NOT LIKE THAT! (LOL)
Seriously, people, if you're not reviewing, shame on you. SHAME! Review! Don't be scared, I won't make fun of you. You don't even have to do a GOOD review! If you hate it, TELL ME! TELL ME WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT! .:giggles:.
Chapter Five: Generally Ginny!
(Flashback to chapter three, yo)
The Malfoy boys were (once again) discussing their narrow escape from the Weasley bunch, and pondering what, exactly, they had done to the girl Weasley. They couldn't quite put their finger on it. "I know it was something, like, totally embarrassing!" Draco gushed. "But I can't remember what I DID to her! She seems the most normal of the bunch… maybe it hasn't come up yet!" (OF COURSE IT HASN'T! What kind of writer do you think I am?)
"Yes… yes, Draco. Knowing you, it's something HORRENDOUS," stated Lucius. "What it is, however, will simply be a mystery until you get on the train for school…"
(End of flashback……….dun dun dun!)
Harry sprinted after Ginny down the length of the train, back to her compartment. His statements of "I would die without you" were gone, he simply sat there and stared at her with a sad look on his face. "I'm not in love with you anymore," He said.
"I didn't ever know that you were," Ginny lied. She inspected his face. Was it… sadness? Guilt? Anger?
"Let's not make this any more difficult than it already is," Harry sulked.
Ginny uncontrollably let out a "SQUEEEEEEEEEEAK" and continued… a little bit… like this….
"Right now you are down and out, and feeling really crappy," Ginny sang.
"I'll say," huffed Harry.
"And when I see how sad you are," continued Ginny, "It sort of makes me… happy!"
"HAPPY?" exclaimed Harry.
"Sorry Harry, human nature- nothing I can do! It's… SCHADENFREUDE! Making me feel glad that I'm not you!" Ginny crooned. She continued with the entire broadway number, ending with the "S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E!" on a particularly high note.
Harry thought to himself, Now we know what's wrong with Ginny. We knew all along what was wrong with the rest of us… Ginny, apparently, bursts out into songs from Broadway musicals every so often. This should be easy to deal with… Or so he thought.
The next day, at breakfast, Ginny, after seeing the tables in The Great Hall overloaded with their usual bacon, eggs, toast, PANCAKES, French toast, waffles, sausages, and muffins, burst into the song "Food, Glorious Food" from the musical Oliver.
The next week in Hogsmeade, she stood on a hill overlooking The Shrieking Shack and proceeded to belt out "The Hills are Alive with the Sound of Music." When she gazed fondly at the goods that she could not afford in Zonko's Joke Shop, she sang "If I Were a Rich Man (GIRL)" from the musical The Fiddler on the Roof. (NOT GWEN STEFANI.)After seeing a poster advertising Broadway musicals in America, she hummed "America" from West Side Story. And at last, when she saw Harry at the end of the day, she sang "I've Grown Accustomed to His Face" from My Fair Lady.
Harry, although he didn't care much about Ginny anymore, had taken to drinking copious amounts of firewhisky, butterbeer, or mead- whenever he could get his hands on them. Since they were strictly prohibited in the school, he stowed them in paper bags, and often could be seen sitting on the floor outside the Gryffindor common room, drinking out of a bottle hidden in the bag. He muttered things such as "WHY DOESN'T HE LOVE ME" and "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH" and "VOLDEMORT KILLED MY PARENTS!"
Ron was becoming more and more concerned about his inebriated friend. He would often come across a totally intoxicated Harry fallen over in the middle of the hall, singing Bright Eyes songs at the top of his voice. Not knowing what else to do, Ron dragged his drunk friend to the office of (who else?) Professor Dumbledore.
"Yo, D-Money. I needs some help wit' mah bro H-Dawg," Ron uttered. "He's out gettin' crunk all da time now, and I be thinkin' he need some help, yo!"
"Dat's coo, Terminator R. We'll be a-sendin' him to da hospiddle of Saint Mungo's soon, yo. He needs some help fo' real," Dumbledore expressed.
With a complete change of tone, Dumbledore said, "We'll be taking him there next Thursday. Thank you, Ronald, for your concern." And with a twinkle of his eyes, he dismissed them from his office.
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SO! That was the end of chapter 5! Review!
Here's stuff that I stole that's not from Harry Potter:
1. ----"I'm not in love with you anymore," He said.
"I didn't ever know that you were," Ginny lied. She inspected his face. Was it… sadness? Guilt? Anger?
"Let's not make this any more difficult than it already is," Harry sulked. ----
----From THE ROYAL TENENBAUMS (Margot and Eli's conversation)----
2. The song that Ginny sings is called "Schadenfreude" from the musical Avenue Q. Go download it, it's hilarious.
I'm gonna have to say thanks to my friends Megan and Kelly for the part where Harry yells things like "VOLDEMORT KILLED MY PARENTS" and "YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH!" That was a night where we put bottles of Mountain Dew: Code Red in paper bags and pretended to be drunk… stayed up all night… and then went to see Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban in the morning. I LURFFF YOU GUYS. That was good times, yo. Cause we're too cool to really get drunk.
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