Sweet Nocturne

Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon.

Chapter 4: Self-Doubt

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Serenity threw her arms around herself as a piercing chill ran throughout her body from inside her chest, spreading till her toes felt frozen and her head pounded with pain. She shut her eyes tightly and gritted her teeth as her body temperature dropped a few more degrees. The pounding increased by the second and she fell on her knees in writhing agony. She clutched her head and was about to scream, until the chill suddenly disappeared as fast as it came.

Serenity was on all fours on the ground, trying to catch her breath. She grabbed onto her chair and gathered herself up shakily, still breathing hard. She looked into the mirror and caught sight of her face, which was now extremely pale, her blue eyes huge with surprise, her mouth slightly trembling from the sheer force of the chill that overtook her for a few seconds. Thunder rumbled in the sky outside, announcing the coming of a storm. She closed her eyes and willed her mind to clear.

Rini.

~*~*~*~

The fire blazed higher and snapped with an almost palpable viciousness. Raye opened her eyes and looked into the flame, not being affected by the intense heat it radiated throughout the darkened room. After a moment's time she closed her eyes again and tried to 'see' the image the dancing flares of red, orange, and yellows had to offer to her. She was beginning to sweat with the intensity of her concentration, until an image appeared for a millisecond.

Pink? She thought questioningly. Her brows furrowed and she tried to look deeper into the fire. This time a succession of images appeared in a very quick blur; Raye saw flashes of pink, amber, and yellow. The yellow was undoubtedly the moon, she thought, recognizing the sliver of the color in the familiar crescent shape. And then she felt the fire go out. The dancing hot colors in her mind turned to a cold, ominous black. She felt a presence right behind her; her eyes shot open and in one breath she grabbed her hidden dagger and readied to threaten the stranger. A strong grip around her wrist stopped her just as quickly.

"Hey—hey! It's me!" the presence cried out.

Raye's vision cleared and she looked up to see cerulean eyes. She saw that her blade was dangerously close to the man's chest, shivering in place by his firm hand which was holding her back. She dropped the dagger and took a deep breath.

"Of all the times to sneak up on me! Jadeite, you are intolerable!" she screamed. As she her temper rose so did the fire behind her respond by flickering brighter and higher. The fire—it's still alive? Raye whirled around to see her sacred fire still burning as before. That's impossible, I felt it go out. What the hell happened? Her thoughts were interrupted quickly.

"Sneak up on you? Hell, nobody sneaks up on you! It's virtually improbable; you sense auras a mile away! What's happening to you? You're probably just stressed. I think the heat's finally getting to you. I—Raye? Raye?" Jadeite's frenzy diminished as he saw the worried expression on the fire senshi's face. He went beside her and held her hand.

"Raye." He said, shaking her. She stood still. He shook her a few more times until he felt his infamous impatience kick back in. "Hey, Pyro! Wake up!" He held both her shoulders and shook her silly.

Raye's couldn't ignore him any longer. "Jed, stop it!" She gave him a slap on the arm and backed up, feeling very peeved that her meditations were disturbed by the person for whom she uncontrollably had the shortest temper span on.

Jadeite rubbed his arm and gave her an annoyed look. "Well, sorry for being concerned, Raye." He had gone through the whole agonizing week in the farther regions of the Earth to settle some foreign affairs, looking forward only to seeing her again. He decided this was not the time he anticipated the week for and turned to leave. It's probably that time of the month, he thought callously. As his feet were about to take action to exit the room, he felt himself being flipped and then pinned to the hard ground. Raye flung a leg over and sat down on him. She looked down at his surprised face and sighed.

"I'm sorry. I was just in a rut again. The images are getting vaguer and harder for me to interpret. I think I'm losing my touch." Raye said sadly. She leaned down and kissed him, her dark hair trailing over and tickling Jadeite's face. She broke the kiss as she felt herself being flipped over onto the floor. Jadeite was now hovering over her.

"It's alright, but you could've just said so. Then again, that would've been boring." He grinned and started kissing her neck. He felt her push his head back up.

"I'm serious, Jed. I feel something big rising—" Jadeite's face cracked into his mischievous grin. "—No, not you." He became all serious again. "I feel some dark energy approaching. At first it was a small latent tinge but now it's as if it exploded. There's something bad coming up and I can't seem to grasp it." She finally said, her eyes filled with distress.

Jadeite stayed quiet for a few moments. "They've probably set up shields against your powers. Or the whole kingdom's, in that matter. That'd have to be some seriously strong force. It's not Metallia?"

Raye shook her head.

Jadeite relaxed. "Right. Then it's something we can take. We've—I mean, you've defeated her before. I don't think there's been as much power in any of our other foes that even came close to hers, and you and the senshi killed her. Don't worry, we can get this." Raye still didn't seem to be soothed by his reassuring words. Jadeite sighed. "Look, we'll go tell Sere, Endy, and the rest of them. We'll figure something out." He stood up and held his hand out for her, only to be pulled back down on top of her.

"Thank you, Jed." Raye smiled up at him while she held on to the collar of his uniform. She hugged him tightly. "I missed you."

Aha! I knew a week would've been just enough. Jadeite propped himself on his elbows, with Raye still under him, and kissed her fervently. "Hey, you're really warm," he said, feeling her neck and face with his un-gloved hands. Her kimono fell off one side to reveal a white shoulder. His trademark naughty grin appeared on his face. "Let's get you out of this, shall we?"

~*~*~*~

The rain poured down steadily outside. From her bed, Rini watched the droplets make their jagged trails down her window, seemingly entranced. Her face showed a blank stupor and she was still shivering not just from the cool of the air on her wet skin, but from her cold fear from falling in her dream as well. Her room was dark and gloomy, like the weather outside. She thought it reflected her inner confusion and disorder as well.

Hell no, I'm way beyond confused. I feel helpless, she thought contemptuously. She hated that feeling; it reminded her too much of when she was sent to the past for her senshi training and failed to save or even protect many others because of her inadequate strength. Her mother told her many times it wasn't her fault and in the end she turned out better than ever expected. Still, Rini wasn't consoled. She hated being the crybaby, and at some times, being the princess. She wanted to be a true senshi and woman in mind, body, and soul. She sighed. I've got a looong way to go.

A stream of yellow light from the hallway patched on the dark floor as her chamber doors opened. Rini recognized the tall and womanly form of Lita with her high ponytail bouncing gracefully behind her. She walked in with some of the cookies she made that morning and a glass of milk, and closed the door gently. Rini looked up at her. She's always there to rescue me. I wish I had her strength.

Lita placed the tray next to Rini and sat down on her other side. She hugged her softly. "How are you feeling?"

"Better," Rini lied. "Thanks, Lita." She smiled meaningfully at her. Gosh I hate lying to her all the time like this.

"Sure sweetie." Lita returned her smile with a sweet, big-sisterly one. She looked out the window. "Weird thing. I didn't feel it coming." She said, remarking about the thunder and lightning that flashed through the dark clouds. They stayed quiet for a while.

The sound of fast, loud high-heeled footsteps rushing down the hallway disrupted the silence. Once again the yellow lights of the hallway pooled into the dark room when the door opened. Rini turned her head and she could see the ever familiar odd buns and shapely figure of the Queen, flanked with the pretty butterfly wing-like ribbon on the back of her dress. Serenity walked into the dim room and softly closed the door. She walked towards the bed. Rini marveled at how her mother radiated her own silvery, moonlike glow, lighting up the room a bit. Or maybe it's just her silver hair, she added. As the moon queens mature their hair turns silver, with maybe a hint of soft lavender, just like Serenity's mother's was. Rini thought it was rather pretty and added that extra bit of sophistication.

Lita stood up and walked towards Serenity, patted her shoulder briefly, and exchanged knowing smiles, before she left the room. The Queen looked at Rini, turned towards the nearby couch, got the woven blanket draped over it, and wrapped it around the shivering form of her daughter. How can someone so strong be so soft at the same time? Rini asked inwardly, her insecurity escalating. She clutched onto the blanket tightly, and she felt a bit soothed.

Rini loved this particular blanket. She and her mother painstakingly wove it themselves about eleven years ago, when she came back from the past. Considering their lack of satisfactory skill, it turned out beautifully: a brilliant white Pegasus on a rich indigo. Rini looked at Serenity, who was now sitting beside her. Rini then noticed the look she had on her face. It was a look of severe maternal worry.

Oh no, she knows.

-*-*-
-Sorry for the delay! The title of this chapter applied mostly to Rini (obviously), I just wanted to get some other action in here with the senshi and shitennou ^.~ Wellz, things will be clearer in the next chapter. Jus gotta get them outta my head and onto paper properly!-