The Experiment
Have you ever tried shitting with your legs curled up? It's one strange experience. You make funny fat-fuck faces while World War 3 erupts in your anal orifice. The clean white floor tiles get a nice pretty brown-with-melted-chocolate-swirls makeover. When it's finally time to finish, you can't because you can't put your feet on the floor. If you do, your girlfriend will dump you because your feet will forever smell like shit. She'll end up dating that fucking nerd from that Internet chat room who likes to pwn noob online all day. Your solution? Take your roommates toothbrush and swoop those tangy little chocolate swirls to the side so you can step down and clean up. Then when your next door neighbor leaves the door open by mistake, snatch his Bad-Ass little pussy, plug its nose, open its mouth, and stuff it with your tasty home brewed chocolate kisses. Later if your roommate happens to ask what the fuck a dead cat smelling like shit is doing under his pillow all you have to say is, "That bitch attacked me so I grabbed the closest thing to use as a weapon, which happened to be your toothbrush and I smacked that SOB across the face and as it was tumbling through mid air, I punted it and lost sight of it. I guess that's where it ended up, and you can't get mad at me I almost fucking died there, Jesus!"
