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Far From The Tree
Chapter 17
HARUHI
Dad happily cradled Emi on his lap, a grin on his face as he listened to her croakily talk about how exciting she found being in hospital was. I was pleased to hear she wasn't as troubled by it as the rest of us were, the last thing I wanted was for her to be traumatised by the whole ordeal.
Speaking of traumatised...
I glanced over at Hikaru, who sat perfectly straight with a look of concentration on his face, as if he were trying his hardest not to move or speak. It took all my will power not to laugh at the great Hikaru Hitachiin, stripped of his charm and charisma in the face of my Father. He looked positively terrified.
"Mr Hikaru bought me presents" Emi beamed.
Dad looked at the man beside me, "How sweet" he smiled, "And what gifts did he get you exactly?"
"No nut foods!" Emi bounced, "And a Mr Hikaru bear!"
I snorted, glancing at the huge bear at her side, "Is that what you called him?"
Emi nodded, and my heart swelled.
"So sweet, very...considerate" Dad smiled, throwing Hikaru a look of silent teasing.
I knew my Father well enough to know when he was trying to make someone uncomfortable. I so wished he wouldn't, but I knew he couldn't help himself.
I hadn't told anyone about the progression of mine and Hikaru's relationship. Not a soul knew about our kiss or the growing feelings I felt towards him. But my Father was the sort of person who could clock a love interest a mile away just by knowing their gender. He'd even tried to set me up with the mail-man up after he'd seen us talking. Making a man uncomfortable was his way of sizing them up to see if they were worth my time. And unfortunately, it seemed Hikaru was falling for every trap he set.
Dad hung around for a while, talking with Emi about the night before and spending a little quality time with her. After some time of sitting there in silence, I quickly decided this conversation didn't concern anyone else but my Father and Daughter.
I met Hikaru's eye, and nodded towards the kitchen. A look of relief washed over him, and he was on his feet following me out before I could even utter a word.
I erupted into giggles the moment we were out of ear shot.
"What's so funny?" Hikaru asked.
"You" I rolled my lips, "I don't think I've ever seen you so quiet"
"Excuse me for quaking under the gaze of a woman's father" he grumbled, "He...goes by 'Father' right? I don't want to misgender him or-"
"Yes. Father is fine. He just dresses feminine" I replied. Honestly I was touched he'd even considered asking, most people just went straight to male, never even considering that Dad identified as anything else.
Hikaru whooshed out a breath.
"You act like you've never seen a cross-dresser before" I accused.
He shook his head, "I couldn't care less about what he wears. I just...I've never been introduced to a woman's parent before"
"Really?" I smirked, "I couldn't tell"
"I like him" he said, "Really. He seems...lovely. A bit intense with his gazes but..."
"He's always like this with men. I wouldn't stress over it. He's just...sizing you up"
"Sizing me up for what?"
I blushed, looking away to turn on the coffee machine, "He's a meddler. He likes to make judgements on the worthiness of the men who enter my life"
"Ah" Hikaru replied, "So he's appraising me"
I laughed, "I suppose"
"Do you think I've passed?"
"You've put in a lot of effort for Emi. So I would say you've passed with flying colours"
Not that it mattered of course. Because I wasn't pursuing anything with Hikaru, no matter how attracted I was to him.
Dad's opinion would be different. I could already predict what his conclusion would be. Hikaru is accepting of Emi, he's thoughtful. He has money and he's drop dead gorgeous. Little did Dad know, was that Hikaru was a womanizer, a commitment-phobe, and a playboy with a bad attitude. He didn't like children, although Emi seemed to be some kind of exception, and I would never be able to give him the high-flying excitement he craved. A relationship with me would mean suburban living, school drop-offs and early nights. Not to mention I was in no way his type. I'd googled him of course. Many times in fact. His ex-girlfriends were supermodels, rich and beautiful supermodels, with tight waists, toned abs, long hair, full breasts...I was a mother with a body to prove it.
What was the point in even considering something with this man? Even if I were to indulge in my fantasies and give in to the attraction, the moment he removed my shirt it would be over. He'd see my stretch-marks, my loose skin from my pregnancy and run a mile.
No. A professional relationship was the way to go.
My thoughts travelled back to the gala. When his lips descended on mine.
If none of the events of the evening before had happened would he have kissed me?
"I'm sorry I came by unannounced" Hikaru said, drawing me out of my fantasies.
I shook myself, pasting a smile on my face.
"Emi loves seeing you" I said, "I think you brightened her day"
Hikaru's cheeks almost flashed pink as a smile touched his lips.
"I know more than anyone how shitty anaphylactic shock is" he said.
The word anaphylactic made a shiver run down my spine.
His brow lowered regretfully, "It's okay" he said, "It's scary. I know. And I'm not going to lie and tell you it's no big deal. But she got through it, and now you at least know how to stop it from happening again"
I nodded slowly, ignoring how my hand shook as I reached for a mug as the stress and pain I'd been repressing reared it's ugly head again.
My baby...scared, struggling to breathe...
Hikaru's hand suddenly came into view, his fingers wrapping around mine.
His voice hissed in my ear, soothingly, "Let me" he breathed, and slowly removed the cup from my hand.
I nodded when I couldn't find my voice.
"I remember my first reaction" he said, turning to the coffee maker and pouring out the drinks, "And it was scary. My Dad certainly made it worse. But Emi is strong, and you would never make her feel like it's something she's caused. You might think she's putting on a front right now, or not fully coming to terms with what happened. But as long as you're there for her, and let her know that the reaction she had can be prevented in the future – she never has to worry about it again"
I blinked, forcing back the tears.
"It hurts knowing my little girl had to go through that" I said, "I know it isn't anyone's fault. But I'm her mother. It's my job to make sure she never has to be scared or in pain"
Hikaru searched my eyes, and slowly, his palm raised to cup my cheek.
A current of electricity passed between us.
"That's how I know you're an amazing mother. Because this is exactly how mine felt when I went through this. And she raised me knowing that this is simply something that happens. It can be managed and controlled. You will keep her safe. Your Dad will, Renge will, and you should know by now that I will too"
I gazed into his hazel eyes and I felt my chest constrict.
Nothing was more meaningful to me than my daughter, and to see the same look of adoration and concern for her reflected back in his eyes was enough to make my entire body call for him. When did he become so close? So caring...
"Thank you for thinking of her..." I uttered, "These gifts...they mean a lot"
Hikaru's eyes searched mine, a look on his face that was stripped bare of all bravado and cockiness I'd grown used to. His gaze was genuine. Caring. Sweet. And so god damn irresistible.
My eyes flickered to his lips for the slightest of seconds.
I wanted to kiss this man. The man who cared enough for my child to rush over to check on her, the one who placed a handmade card on his desk for everyone to see, the man who spoke such reassuring words in my time of need...
My breath hitched.
"Momma!" Emi's voice sang from the living room.
I tore my eyes from Hikaru, turning to the doorway. I stepped out to see Emi running towards me.
"Grandpa is going" she said.
"He is?"
I looked up, seeing Dad adjusting his handbag on his shoulder.
"I swapped my shift this morning" he said, "So I have to head in at 1"
I nodded, "Tomorrow for dinner though right?"
He smiled, leaning down to pull Emi into a tight squeeze, "Of course" he said, "I'll bring you something special tomorrow okay? Have fun with Momma and Mr Hikaru" he beamed at my little girl.
Emi nodded frantically, "Mr Hikaru is watching Tangled with me"
"I am?" Hikaru raised a brow.
Emi flashed him a look that said – Of course we are.
"I am" he concluded with an animated fake grin.
Dad placed Emi into my arms, then turned to Hikaru. He gulped as my father approached him.
I couldn't hear what Dad said as he leaned in to whisper in his ear, but whatever it was, it peaked my curiousity as Hikaru's eyes went wide and face turned scarlet.
Hikaru nodded, grabbing my Father's hand and shaking it fiercely, as if making the biggest business deal of his life.
"Yes sir" he said.
Dad grinned in accomplishment, "See that you do"
He patted me affectionately on the head as he passed, then stepped out into the hall towards the front door. I quickly shot my gaze between Hikaru and him, then passed Emi into Hikaru's unsuspecting arms.
I ignored his shocked expression as I chased after Dad.
"What did you-"
"He's a good one" Dad winked, his voice hushed so only I could hear him.
"Dad, he's my boss"
"And?"
"Dad-"
"Just...don't write him off" he replied, "I like him. Don't ruin that"
I bit my tongue.
"I'll see you tomorrow"
I took in a deep breath, not wanting to stir him further. I knew he had good intentions, he's always wanted me to meet a nice man. And although Hikaru was lovely, he wasn't on the cards when it came to a relationship. Our dynamic wasn't even in the right ball park.
"Okay..." I sighed reluctantly.
"I love you"
"I love you too"
HIKARU
Emi giggled in my arms as Haruhi and her Dad said goodbye at the door. My arms went rigged, terrified I was going to drop her onto the kitchen floor, or hold her too tight it would hurt her. I simply froze in place, waiting patiently for Haruhi to come back.
Emi's small hand grabbed my cheek, pinching it to turn my head.
Her grinning face greeted me.
"Momma told me you danced with her" she said.
I blinked, "She did?"
Emi nodded, "Momma is a real Princess now, 'cause she danced with a Prince"
"I'm no Prince" I scoffed.
"Prince's are handsome, and Momma always says you're handsome"
"She does?"
She nodded again.
I was liking this girl more and more. I loved how kids never knew how to keep a secret, they always told you exactly what was on their mind, not like adults who avoided the truth in fear of judgement.
"What else does Momma say about me?"
The little girl thought for a moment, "She told Auntie Ren Ren that you're nicer than she thought you were"
I furrowed my brow, "She didn't think I was 'nice'?"
"She was sad when you were mean to me when I was sick" she replied, matter-of-factly.
"Oh..." I breathed.
That day seemed like a life time ago now...the day I first met Haruhi. I remembered that moment Emi had stumbled into the meeting room, how pale and afraid she looked when she called out to her Mother. Pain shot through my chest. I'd barely cared at the time, I don't think I'd even realised how sick Emi had looked until afterwards...or maybe not until now...
"Did I...scare you?" I asked hesitantly.
Emi pursed her small mouth, "I don't like it when grown ups shout at each other" she said, "But when Momma shouted at you - it was funny"
I couldn't help the amused smirk on my face, "Funny?" I repeated.
She nodded, grinning, "It's like Eugene in Tangled"
"Huh?"
"Eugene was a baddie. But Rapunzel made him good"
"Rapunzel?"
Emi rolled her eyes, and for a split second she looked exactly like her mother, "We need to watch Tangled" she sighed, "You don't get it yet"
"I suppose I don't" I admitted.
Emi sighed again, as if completely done with my shit. She then stretched an arm out towards the doorway, pointing a small finger in the direction of the living room, "Let's go find Mr Hikaru bear, we watch the movie together"
"All of us?" I raised a brow.
"Momma loves Tangled. But she doesn't tell people" Emi shrugged, "But so you know, Momma's favourite is 'Brave'"
"Brave?"
The little girl stared at me as if I were the dumbest person she'd ever met.
"I suppose I have a lot of movies to catch up on..." I uttered.
"Don't worry Mr Hikaru" she said, "I teach you"
"You teach me?" I smirked at her broken sentence, loving how adorable she sounded as she scolded me in her own unique way.
She nodded, pointing to the door again, more urgently this time, "That way"
I bowed my head, "Of course my lady"
…
"Another coffee?" Haruhi asked, stretching out her arms as she stood from the couch.
"No, it's okay" I said, "I should probably head home soon anyway"
"What time is it?" she yawned.
I checked my watch.
"Half 8"
"It feels later" she chuckled lightly.
"It's been a long weekend" my eyes rested on Emi, who laid across the blanket, eyes closed, snoring quietly through open lips. I laughed to myself.
"I can't believe you watched all those movies" Haruhi smirked, "Your brains must be goo"
I shrugged, "They weren't bad. Actually I kinda liked watching something I didn't have to think about"
"Treasure that feeling. Because it'll go away when you've seen them over a hundred times"
"Maybe next time she'll watch one of my favourite movies"
"You can try and convince her, but I doubt you'll like her so much after one of her famous tantrums"
"Won't I?"
"She stamps her feet"
"Oh dear"
"And pouts"
I scoffed, "Like her Mother then?"
Haruhi gasped, "I do not pout!"
"You so do"
"Lies"
"You're literally pouting right now"
Her lips slammed shut and formed a forced line. I laughed.
She rolled her eyes.
"I should get her to bed" She breathed, glancing at her sleeping daughter, sprawled across the couch - leaving little room for Haruhi or I to sit.
Haruhi bent down to pick her up, but I shook my head.
"Let me" I said, hoisting Emi up into my ams. She stirred slightly, but didn't wake up. She looked so peaceful as she took in shallow and calm breaths - whilst nestling closer to my chest. It made me wonder if I'd ever truly had a full night's sleep as serene as hers. I looked back at her Mother, who watched me with a grateful look on her face, although she immediately did her best to shrug it off – masking it with a bravado of nonchalance.
I smirked toyingly, "Please tell me you don't carry her up those stairs every night"
She grimaced animatedly.
I raised a brow, following Haruhi as she led the way to the stairs, "You'll ruin your back" I grumbled.
"She's my baby. I'd carry her even if she was 20" she replied.
"And how much use do you think you'll be when you're hunched over with a dis-aligned spine?"
"You're so over-exaggerating"
"Maybe" I shrugged, "But she's still heavy"
"She's not heavy"
"Not to me. But then again I'm only carrying her once. You do it every night"
"It's not like there's anyone else around to do it"
I bit my lip before I said something I'd regret.
"I'll carry her until I can't anymore" she said, "I'm dreading the day she decides she's too big and takes herself to bed on her own"
"She's only 4. You have a few years until then"
"She's already way too independent for my liking. I give it a couple of months before she's making her own hot milk and tucking herself into the covers" Haruhi frowned as she spoke, quietly pushing open Emi's bedroom door.
I stared in awe at the lovely bedroom revealed to me, filled with neatly organised Legos, train sets and teddies on shelves, and a small bed made up like one in a doll's house. The walls were a mint green, and photos of unicorns, Princesses and Pirates decorated the blank space. Haruhi then clicked on a dim nightlight, illuminating the room in stars, and suddenly the room transformed into a sanctuary that left me in complete wonder.
"It's funny isn't it" Haruhi breathed, "Sometimes I feel like the grown ups appreciate it more than the child...I'd give anything to fall asleep under the stars like this..."
"I suddenly understand why she's so happy all the time" I said, "Haruhi...this is amazing"
She shrugged off my comment, "It's a little girl's bedroom, there are a 100 pinterest boards mirroring this"
"No" I shook my head, "Not like this"
I moved to the bed, slowly kneeling down to slide Emi under the duvet. Haruhi adjusted the pillows under her head and the little girl yawned, her eyes fluttering open for the slighted second.
"Shh" Haruhi cooed, running her fingers into her daughter's auburn hair, "Sweet dreams angel" she whispered.
Emi nodded her head, her eyes barely open.
"Night night Momma" she drawled, then looked at me, a smile touching her sweet face, "Is Mr Hikaru bear here?"
"Mr Hikaru bear?" I questioned. My thoughts rolled in my mind, and I could think of nothing but that huge teddy bear waiting on the couch downstairs for her, "I'll bring him up to you" I whispered, "I'll put him over in the chair. I don't think he'll fit in the bed with you"
Emi nodded slowly, yawning widely, "Night night Mr Hikaru" she uttered.
My heart squeezed, "Night night Princess"
And with that, Emi simply nodded once and closed her eyes, soft snores passing her lips as she fell back into a deep sleep.
Haruhi and I quietly made our way back downstairs, finding ourselves in the kitchen. I watched as Haruhi pulled out two wine glasses, waving one in my direction.
"How could I refuse?" I smirked, "You trying to get me drunk?"
She snorted, pouring the red liquid into the empty glasses, and handing me the one on the left.
"You worried it may lower your inhibitions?" she chuckled.
"Not at all" I replied, and took a sip. It wasn't the dry aged vintage I was used to, but it was nice enough.
We made our way back to the couch, where we slumped down beside one another. I found myself stretching out comfortably, as if I were sat in my own home. At first it had struck me as strange, but as the days spent with Haruhi and Emi went on, I found that it was all because of them I felt so at ease and welcome. I felt like they wanted me there as much as I wanted to be there.
I gazed at Haruhi's lovely face, as her brown eyes looked back at me over the rim of her glass.
"What?" she swallowed, raising a brow.
"Nothing" I smiled.
Just that I find you so beautiful that it makes my head spin...
"Thank you" she said.
"For what?"
"Coming over"
"You already thanked me for that"
"I know" she shrugged, "But I want you to know that I mean it. Emi had such a lovely day today, it was exactly what she needed after last night"
"What about you?"
She thought for a moment, then nodded, "I think I needed it too" she said, "I was worried I would find myself wandering around in a panic when we got home this morning. Thanks to you I haven't stressed once"
I bit back a grin, "Anytime"
And I meant it. There were very few people I would drop everything for the rush to their aid. Maybe only Kaoru, Kazue and Mom. And now Haruhi and Emi.
My hand covered hers, and for a moment we both simply stared at our joined palms. She seemed to be pondering our attraction, battling between pulling her hand away and pulling me closer. I could feel her desire through the heat of her soft fingers, inching towards mine before she took another sip of her drink.
I found myself staring at those lips as they curled around the rim of her glass – remembering how they had felt against mine...
The way she looked back at me told me she was thinking the same thing.
"Hikaru" Haruhi sighed, and I already knew what she was going to say.
I cut her off before she could give me another rendition of the conversation we'd had in her office the day after we'd given in to our urges, when she told me we couldn't continue the way we were...
Clearly that plan's going well...
"It's okay..." was all I could say.
Her brows raised hopelessly, as if she were hoping to hear me agree with her silent protest. But honestly...I wasn't sure I could hold back anymore. My hand gripped hers as her fingers laced between mine desperately.
"We've been through this..." she said, "We...can't"
"Why not?" I breathed.
"You're my boss" she hissed.
"So?"
"It's unprofessional"
"But you know just as well as I do how much we want each other...why are we running from it for the sake of reputation?"
She hesitated at my words. They were blunt, honest, and clear. And although I knew hearing those words would be a shock to her, I also knew that deep down she'd already known I felt this way. The both of us had tried to resist it, to silence those feelings to keep the facade of professionalism. But the more time we spent together, the more I saw her smile, the more I got to know her – the harder it got to resist the desire to have her.
Her breathing was all I could focus on.
"Haruhi" I uttered. My free palm lifted to her cheek, and I reveled in the feeling of her leaning into my touch, "I want to kiss you..." I whispered, my words brushing her lips.
"I want you to..." she said, "I shouldn't...but..."
"Don't think about that" I shook my head, our faces neared, our noses slotting against one another. I could feel her breath on my lips, the warmth of her skin...so close...
Then she closed the final gap.
And everything in my world exploded - at it's center was only Haruhi, and the feeling of her lips against mine.
