The next day it was still too wet to work in the field. Luke was happy when Jesse made that announcement, but sobered up pretty quick when he found out his Uncle had already made plans for them. As soon as breakfast was over and Daisy was gone to the Boar's Nest, Jesse sent Bo and Luke up to Cleveland to fill up the back of his truck with bags of feed. Seems Mr. Lewis, the Auctioneer, got wind of a real good deal on the stuff and Jesse just couldn't afford not to buy any.

Seeing the boys off, Jesse snuck back in the house, deciding to leave the breakfast dishes for now. Going over to his easy chair, he leaned back, grabbing up the latest edition of the weekly newspaper. He savored the rare moment of peace, one in which everyone else was gone and all the chores that could be done were, sans the dishes that shouldn't take long.

He had barely started on the first page when the door of his kitchen opened and he heard someone fall inside with labored breathing.

Tossing the paper to the side, he quickly got up and ran to the kitchen. Seeing the form that laid there, he stopped.

"J.D.?" Jesse asked as Boss Hogg huffed and puffed. "What in the world happened to ya?"

"Oh Jesse!" Boss began, struggling to stand to his feet, finally being able to with Jesse's assistance. "Jesse, ya gotta help me, they're tryin' to kill me!"

"Who is?"

Boss took a couple more deep breaths. "Lulu…..Lulu and Rosco!"

"Alllllllllright doughboy." Rosco began, talking into a bullhorn as he came in the door after Boss. "You know the rules. No breaks 'till we git to Dixon Pond."

Boss stopped huffing and puffing instantly and gave Rosco a hard stare. "The next break around here is gonna be your arm if you call me doughboy again!" He announced, jerking the bullhorn out of the sheriff's hand.

"What's goin' on here?" Jesse had to ask, finally realizing for the first time that the white suit Boss Hogg wore was a sweat suit instead of his normal attire.

"What's goin' on is I been runnin' for the last half hour about to collapse at any moment while Hazzard County's worst here has been drivin' alongside me munchin' on a doughnut." He gulped for air at seeing the leftover breakfast on the table. "That's another thing, Jesse. They been starvin' me to death too. You don't mind if I make myself a lil ole plate, do ya?"

Without waiting for an answer, Boss grabbed a plate and dumped what was left of each dish onto it, sitting down as he prepared to eat. Jesse snarled at the site, as he had made enough breakfast to heat up for the family the next day as well.

"Well actually J.D……" Jesse began, being interrupted by Rosco as Boss prepared to put the first bite in his mouth.

"That's right. You just go ahead and fill that belly up, little fat buddy. Build all them calories back that ya just burned off. But don't git mad when I tell Lulu on you, 'cause she made me promise."

Boss jerked his head toward Rosco. "You can't!"

"I could."

"You wouldn't!"

"I would…..er will."

With a pained expression, Boss dropped the fork and rose from his seat. "Alright, you win for now. But you keep it up Rosco, and I'll send that fat sister of yours back to live with you, cause it's gettin where even I can't afford to keep her around no more!"

"Ah." Jesse smiled. "So you're tryin' to shed a little weight, huh J.D.?"

"Well it certainly ain't by choice. Lulu went and got herself an Atlanta newspaper the other day and read about one of them fancy hypnotists that's supposed to be able to help you control your eatin'. And she done called him up here to use that mumbo jumbo on the both of us. Now do you think I'm ah gonna sit there and let some M.D. wanna be try that brainwashin' stuff on me? No siree bob! Besides…." He continued, breaking off a piece of a biscuit and popping it in his mouth. "I gotta lot better things to spend a hundred dollars on than a bunch of hogwash!"

"Like a day's worth of groceries." Rosco chimed in.

"Like a day's worth of…." Boss stopped short and looked at the sheriff with an annoyed expression before he relaxed and shrugged his shoulders. "Like two days worth of groceries."

"A hundred dollars?" Jesse asked.

"That's how much that fool doctor charges for an hour of his time." Boss clarified. He reached for another pinch of a biscuit, only to be slapped away by Rosco. As Boss opened his mouth to give him a piece of his mind, Rosco shook his finger at him.

"Anyway, I don't care how good he is. Nobody, and I mean nobody, is worth two hundred dollars an hour. Not even me. I'm county commissioner around here and the most I'm worth is…"

Rosco interrupted with. "Ninety-nine dollars and ninety-nine cents!"

"Humph! Rosco! Would you keep your big trap shut?" Boss scolded him.

"Sorry Boss, I's just rememberin' that time that the ladies auxiliary needed a guest speaker and you showed up and deducted the appearance fee from the county fund. It was exactly ninety-….."

"Would you just hush up?" Boss whispered as Jesse looked at the pair quizzically. "Ya gotta be careful when you say stuff like that around these Dukes! You know how they are, always stickin' their noses in other people's business. We sure don't need none of 'em down at the courthouse huntin' the county records!" He then turned back to Jesse. "Anyway Jesse, the only way I could talk Lulu into lettin' me outta that quack session was to agree to this whole diet and exercise regimen. I swear….." Boss began, looking as if he were about to cry. "…..losin' this weight's gonna kill me."

"Well it certainly ain't helpin' you none by standin' around in here smellin' all that fattnin' food them Dukes had for breakfast. Tell you what. Let's go on and make our way to Dixon Pond. Then when we get back to town I'll make you a nice breakfast of your own."

Boss smiled in excitement. "You mean like a plate full of ham with a dozen scrambled eggs and some biscuits on the side?"

"Not exactly. It's more like a cup full of oatmeal with a couple of strawberries and a tall glass of water on the side."

"Water? For breakfast?" Boss wailed.

"Well ya gotta keep hydrated with all this exercise." Rosco pointed out. As Boss followed Rosco back out the door, he snuck a biscuit from the table, hiding it under his shirt. Jesse walked to the door and watched as the pair continued on in the direction of Dixon Pond.

XXXXXXXXX

The next morning, at three, Luke was awakened by Maudine, who was out at the barn braying. He sat up and turned on the lamp, listening a moment before he sprang from bed.

"Bo!" He exclaimed, turning to look at the younger Duke. Seeing Bo resting peacefully, he decided to check things out himself. It had taken convincing and total exhaustion for his cousin to fall asleep the night before, even after a hard day of moving fifty pound feed bags.

Luke opened the door and rushed to the kitchen, where he took the side door going outside. Looking for anything he could use as a weapon against the prowler-if that's who it was-he reached down and grabbed a thick stick from the ground as he ran.

Reaching the barn, he groped the air for the string that extended from the overhead bulb. Finally flicking it on, he observed the scene in front of him.

"Buster! You ole' rascal. Whatcha gettin' poor Maudine all in a tizzy for?"

Buster was a dog that belonged to their neighbors, a dog that was a little too friendly for Bo's taste. The love that the dog had for Bo balanced the hate it had for Maudine, and it'd taken to aggravating her every chance he got.

The dog's attention quickly turned from Maudine to Luke, offering him the same excited attention normally reserved for Bo.

"Take it easy boy! I ain't Bo!" Luke ordered the dog, who began jumping on him continuously. The dog settled back a bit and barked, wagging it's tail madly as it looked at Luke's hand.

Luke frowned in confusion at the dog's attitude. He then turned to see what got the dog's attention.

Instead of the stick he thought he had grabbed, Luke found out that his weapon of choice had been a rather large bone that Buster had obviously abandoned at the tree outside.

Laughing, Luke went to the door and hurled the bone as far as he could. Yipping in excitement, Buster charged after it.

As soon as the dog was gone, Luke offered Maudine a reassuring pat before quickly killing the light and closing the door, so the dog could not get back in that night.

As he started back for the house, he heard the sound of a crash coming from inside. He looked up and noticed that the lamp to his and Bo's room went out abruptly.

Because the window was closer than the door, he simply ran up to it and peered inside. From what he could tell, Bo was on the floor between the two beds, thrashing around.

"Oh no." Luke muttered, opening the window wide. He then put his foot on the hose reel that extended from the house and hoisted himself up into his room.

"Bo! Bo wake up!" He ordered before he could even reach his cousin. He rushed over to turn on the overhead light and turned, looking at the scene in surprise.

It appeared that Bo was fully awake--and simply going mad! He was on the floor, the sheet that was still wrapped around him having saved him from most of the jagged edges of the busted lamp. He struggled to get out of the sheet, reaching for the handle on the drawer of their nightstand, pulling the drawer all the way out forcefully and dumping the contents on the floor.

"Bo! Bo snap out of it!" Luke ordered, hurtling over his bed and taking Bo by the shoulders.

"What's goin' on?" Uncle Jesse asked from the door, his eyes widening in surprise as Bo pushed Luke off of him and began pawing through the drawer contents.

"Bo! That's enough!" Luke exclaimed, grabbing his arms and turning him over away from the glass in an effort to bring some sense to him.

As Luke held him down on the floor, what he saw made him gasp.

Bo's lips were tinged blue! He looked around with wild eyes as he struggled to breath.

"Dear Lord!" Daisy exclaimed, not mistaking what was going on although she hadn't seen Bo this way in over five years. "He's having an asthma attack!"

Ain't nothin' took Bo's breath away like that since the 9th grade when he went fishin' at Dixon Pond- and Lora Leigh Hawkins was there skinny dippin'.