Part 2 - Ready or Not

I wasn't ready. The thought drifted through Piper's mind like a summer breeze gently ruffling a curtain on a still day. From her seat at the vanity her eyes followed the moonlight streaming through her window. Tracing its path to the rumpled bed she had so recently left and the man who still slept there. The corner of her mouth lifted in a mischievous smile; she could wake him, though in truth he could probably use a little more sleep. No. Her thoughts were company enough for the time being.

It wasn't guilt that had awakened her but, rather, it's absence that now weighed on her mind. Piper picked up her hairbrush and glanced again at the bed. Tousled dark curls resting against the snowy pillowcase, the sheet twisted at his hips revealing a wide expanse of broad, well-muscled chest; he looked so peaceful. "Beautiful," she breathed. And still the guilt wouldn't come.

She began brushing her hair distractedly. Last night and tonight had been coming for so long that right and wrong no longer seemed a factor. Piper knew she hadn't set out to fall in love with him. But she also knew the moment she had goaded him about the mistletoe that she had forever crossed an invisible boundary. She'd spent the longest half-hour of her life waiting to see if he would cross that line with her. That he had still held a dream-like quality to her.

If she needed something to blame, she supposed that she could fault pity. It was pity that colored her first conscious emotion toward Cole. It had swelled within her as she watched his face the first time Phoebe had returned from Jason's without even the pretense of an excuse. She'd seen the rage and pain he held so carefully in check, and her heart had bled as she imagined his was doing. Piper had come closer to hating her sister in that moment than she ever wished to again. But as Cole's pain had shifted to resignation she found some small understanding for her sister. Perhaps they should have listened to her doubts about being ready for marriage. And Piper had had her own problems to deal with.

She and Leo had gone from soul mates to something less than meant to be. The arguments had occasionally been bitter, but the journey itself a sadly quiet transition. They had built a wall of silence between themselves a brick at a time. When he had gone off in the service of his 'greater good' to become an Elder, Piper had watched him go with something akin to relief. She wondered, as she replaced the hairbrush, if Cole had pitied her as well.

He stirred in his sleep, drawing Piper's attention to the bed again. He's getting restless. That thought brought another small smile. It was one of the reasons love had eventually been born of pity. It actually mattered whether she was there.

As they had spent an increasing amount of time in one another's company it became apparent that he didn't see her needs or desires as an imposition. He didn't accommodate her demands; he enjoyed her company. They valued the same things in life. He heard her when she spoke and talked to her, not at her. For her part, Piper grew to cherish each moment they spent together. Cole saw much of the world with the simplicity of a child. Every new experience was an adventure for him. His joy and excitement were often contagious.

"Just like an oversized kid," she laughed quietly to the listening moon.

She shook her head as she remembered the Christmas shopping trip. Two weeks until the big day and she had dragged him to a packed mall. She had been flabbergasted that he had never been Christmas shopping. He had been appalled by the crush.

"My God, doesn't anyone do this ahead of time?" he'd asked in a horrified whisper.

"It'll be okay. I'll protect the big, bad demon from the Christmas shoppers," she'd told him with a laugh and a pat on the arm.

A low growl had been his only response, but he had soon been caught up in the good cheer. Smiling at the children waiting to see Santa, wide eyed with wonder at the store displays. He'd happily followed her from store to store and had even briefly wandered off on his own. The end of the day had found them both smiling and tired, with yet another memory to be wrapped in tissue paper like a secret treasure. So if this was wrong, Piper didn't want to feel right anymore.

It wasn't that she didn't care that others were going to be hurt. She did. But she was so tired of caring more about everyone else's happiness than she did her own. This time she wanted to be happy. She didn't want to be responsible while everyone else got to play. Funny, it had taken this to help her understand how Prue had felt when she and Leo had married. Prue. Just one of the things that had been sacrificed for the sake of what was right. Piper sighed.

"Well, not this time," Piper whispered with resolve.

Being with Cole made her happy and it made him happy. If their happiness would mean that things got a bit messy or complicated when the others found out... Well, they'd sort it out then. Then would probably be the near future as things were. This was the second night he had spent in her bed. And any more gifts like her surprise Christmas present weren't likely to go unnoticed.

Piper reached out and ran her finger lightly along the silver trimmed scalloped edge of the base. A pool of glitter snow surrounded two doves encased in a glass heart. The ivory porcelain base was adorned with fragile pale pink roses. She had admired the musical water globe on their shopping trip. But she had never dreamed of owning it. He'd been so cute when he had discreetly slid the box into her gift pile that morning.

Piper gazed at the box curiously.

"What's this?" she asked quietly.

" A Christmas present silly, you did drag me to the mall to go Christmas shopping didn't you?"

Piper smiled. "So what is it?"

"Well, you have to open it to find out. I'm not telling you what it is," he grinned secretively.

"Devil."

"Not exactly."

Piper waited until she was sure her sister's were engrossed in their own gifts before she reached for the box. She peeled the paper away carefully, opened the lid and lifted the tissue paper from inside. Her eyes widened and her heart stilled in her chest when she saw the globe. She raised tear filled eyes to look at Cole, her lips quavered under the force of the contained emotion.

" Hey," His soft voice conveyed his concern. " I thought you liked it."

"It's beautiful," she cast a sidelong glance at Phoebe and Paige to be certain the exchange hadn't been observed. "Thank you," she whispered with a squeeze to his hand.

Cole's worried expression melted into a smile brighter than all the Christmas lights in the room.

The memory alone caused Piper's eyes to tear up again. She lifted the globe gently from the vanity top, tilted it and wound the mechanism. She set it down; a glitter snowfall swirled around the doves as the lilting strains of Cavallaro's 'To Love Again' filled the quiet night.

"Piper," Cole mumbled from the bed.

Rising, she returned to bed, slipping between the sheets and into his arms.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you," she smiled and ran her fingers along his jaw.

"It's alright," he drew her closer and dropped a kiss on her forehead " are you okay?"

Piper snuggled closer still; "I'm fine."

Laying her head on his shoulder, Piper realized that she might not have been ready, but love had found her, ready or not.