A.N. Okay, if this chapter comes out really late, this is just a note to say that I started it uber-early, but got side-tracked by things that probably haven't happened yet but most probably will =P… wow I've lost so many reviewers already hinthint haha jokes… =P I can understand if you're too lazy to review…pouts only 3 reviews last time throws anime tantrum haha…oh and I should warn you that Treize gets pretty OOC… -

Still the same deal with and

Chapter 15- A Little More Fun/ You Fag! No offence meant ok? -

"Uh…" Noin stuttered, totally stunned by this sudden proposal. "Well…I…uh…"

"Oh come on Noin, just say yes already, so that Milliardo can get some actual clothes on and not have roses stuck to his naked body!" Une told her, slightly impatiently. "The sight of Treize drooling over there doesn't exactly fill me with confidence either…" she rolled her eyes, pointing to the figure of Treize, who was standing behind Heero in the corridor. Sorry, Kitsuri-Shukun! -v

"Hmm," Noin pondered. She saw the impatience on everyone's faces and Milliardo standing there, somehow keeping roses attached to his body while wearing nothing. She smiled. "I'll think about it".

Everyoe fell over anime-style.

Une sighed. "Milliardo, go upstairs, for the love of Pete, get those roses off, and change!"

"Yeah, that's a good idea," Treize agreed enthusiastically. "I'll just go upstairs and help him!" he started up the stairs after Milliardo ok…just so I don't go too far…what is this rated again? Haha joking =P

"Oh no ya don't," Une grabbed him by the back of his collar. "You sit down"

"Yes ma'am," Treize meekly obeyed and sank into a seat nearby, in silence. A short yell of pain, followed by a long string of profanity echoed from upstairs, probably as Milliardo attempted to pull all the roses out of his body.

"Milliardo needs me!" Treize shot up out of his chair and made for the stairs but once again Une was too quick for him and this time, she tied him firmly to the chair using thick, strong steel cord.

"Oh come on Lady Une," Treize pleaded with her as she tightened the rope, just for spite. "You don't have to do this, you can trust MEEE," he put on his sweet begging voice.

"Never heard him use that tone of voice before," Heero muttered

"You weakling!" Wufei giggled. "You're begging a woman to let you go!"

"What is wrong with him…?" Treize asked bewildered, looking at the giggling form of his formerly formidable foe.

"No more than what's wrong with you, believe me," Une told him drily, rolling her eyes. "What is taking Milliardo so long anyway?" she yelled up the stairs, hoping that Milliardo would take the hint. The bedroom door opened and Milliardo stuck his head out, a couple of roses still hopelessly tangled in the tragic mess that was formerly recognisable as his hair.

"You try pulling roses out of your beautiful delicate skin and see how long it takes YOU Une!"

"For Pete's sake, man! You're pulling them out, not GROWING THEM!" she retorted

"Oh shut up," he sniffed, "It's not my fault that SOME OF US like to put some EFFORT into our appearances!" he slammed the door in a huff, and didn't manage to get his nose out of the way of the closing door in time. Everyone downstairs winced as they heard the crack and much swearing. A few seconds later they heard a nasally distorted voice from the room assuring them-

"I am OK!"

Noin sighed. "That's it- I'm gonna go up there and help him pluck those damn roses off! You may even say I'm deflowering him, hohoho!" she added mischeviously, getting blank looks from the kids and incredulous stares from most of the adults.

"Deflowering? I like flowers! Heero, how do you deflower?" Relena asked Heero, waiting expectantly for a reply damn I make these kids say the wrongest things…lol…and say flower for a while, it starts sounding really weird… ANYWAY….

"Uh…" Heero stuttered at a total lost for words.

"Don't ask him, he wouldn't know anything about it," Sally chortled,earning herself a death glare. "Noin, you're terrible!" she laughed and smacked her over the back of her head.

"What did I do?" Noin protested her feigned innocence and grinned as she made her way upstairs to assist Milliardo in his plight.

As she progressively worked her way up the stairs, the profanity got louder and worse.

"Milliardo?" she called out, as she drew closer.

"Yes, darling one?" he replied, "!#$%&()%!#%!!" he swore as two more roses came out.

"I'm going to come in there and help you okay?" she told him as she slowly turned the knob to enter the room.

"Uh… no! No, sweet pet, don't you worry your pretty little head about these things. I am a man, I can handle these troublesome little flowers!" he told her through clenched teeth as he pulled out another few from his leg. More swearing and cursing ensued.

"Are you sure? Cos you sound like you're in trouble there," she asked again

"Don't you worry honey, I'll…be…fine…!#$%&()&%$!!"

"Uh…okay then," she shrugged and made her way downstairs. If he could blow up a Gundam and face most of OZ's mobile suit in his Tallgeese, then surely he could handle a few plants, right?

"Hey Noin, that's pretty quick for a deflowering," Sally commented as Noin made her way downstairs. "Done so fast?"

"Oh haha," she retorted sarcastically, plonking herself into a seat next to the now bound AND gagged Treize. She looked at him curiously. Somehow in the time she took to climb upstairs and down, he had managed to get himself gagged. "Anyway," she continued, "Milliardo's convinced that he's enough of a man to handle a few roses, so…" she shrugged, "I just left him to it."

"Are you sure?" Treize somehow managed to talk through the gag. "He may be in trouble! He may be bleeding to death as we speak! He needs me! I'm coming Milliardo!" he started hopping (still tied to the chair) in the direction of the stairs and managed to get a few steps before he overbalanced and fell over on his face. "Owww…" he moaned.

"Treize, what is wrong with you?" Noin pulled him upright and took the gag out of his mouth so he could talk. She looked at him curiously waiting for an answer.

"Well…I…uh…" Treize sat squeemishly uncomfortable under Noin's gaze, avoiding her eyes. "You see Noin…Milliardo is so… he's… well… he's just so uh…close to me! Yeah! He's just such a close friend of mine…yeah! I just wouldn't want to see him uh… struggling and in pain cos I love him… AS A FRIEND!" he added quickly, realizing what he had just said out loud.

"Oh because the peril of the deadly evil roses is too much for little Milly-Willy to handle!" Noin taunted, putting on a baby voice. They paused as yet another wave of profanity streamed down the stairs from his room.

"It would seem so!" Treize replied, as he struggled to get to the stairs that were separating him from his fantas…good friend! -

"You're such a fag Treize," Heero growled.

"Well excuuuse me, but what did I ever do to you to deserve that title? You're a fag!" Treize protested indignantly. "Just cos I was leader of OZ and tried to kill you guys…" he sniffed, "But I thought that was all past us now… your words hurt Heero, they hurt more than the sight of a shoddy manicure…"

"Uh…" a giant collective anime sweatdrop ran down everyone's faces ok I really don't know if that sentence made ANY sense.

"See, that's exactly what I mean- you're a fag!"

"Treize is a fag, Treize is a fag!" Wufei and Duo joined hands ?! and started skipping round Treize in a circle, chanting in an annoying sing-song voice.

"You know," Sally commented as she observed Wufei interacting with Duo, "I'm always telling him to lighten up and to be more human… well never again…" she looked kinda scared of the little Wufei so filled with joy and happiness.

"Aww but he's so cute," Noin bent down to pinch his cheeks.

"Get away from me baka onna!" Wufei giggled.

"Or what are you gonna do? Grin me to death?" Noin teased. Wufei "glared" at her, although under the influence of happy pills, the look turned out more like puppy-dog eyes- a look which didn't really fit on him, but looked extremely cute nonetheless.

"Aww…" she squealed and glomped affectionately uber-hugged the little chibi.

"Oh stop teasing Noin," Sally told her, "I'm beginning to think that YOU'RE loaded on happy pills!"

"HEY!" Treize had to yell to get their attention again. "Back to why Heero called me a fag!"

"Oh yeah…" they all suddenly remembered that Treize was still there.

"So?" he asked, demanding an explanation, "Why did you call me a fag Heero? What does it mean?!?!"

"Urbandictionary.com," Heero replied simply.

-- Five minutes later--

Noin sat in front of the computer, waiting impatiently for urbandictionary.com to load. The rest were crowded around her (with the exception of Milliardo, who was still battling the flowers upstairs), all eyes on the loading screen

"Come on! Come ON!" Noin banged the mouse on the table impatiently.

"NOIN! Don't abuse the mouse!" Une told her, "My poor mouse!"

"Is it just me, or is everyone really really weird today?" Noin bit back, slightly frustrated. "And WHY do you have AOL? I'll be lucky if my kids don't grow up before this loads!"

"Well SORRY, but it was cheaper!"

"Ever wondered why?"

"The page has loaded," Heero cut in to stop them bickering… between Duo trying to be an aeroplane and those two bickering he'd choose Duo's aeroplane-ness hurrah for made up words! any day…well… that really depends… ANYWAY…

"Okay…" Noin scrolled down the page, looking at the various definitions of the word 'fag'. "Well, in this context, the word 'fag' could either mean… "A word used by ignorant homophobic teenage males to describe anybody/thing but themselves. This is almost always in a subconscious attempt to prove that they are not gay; everybody around them is" or "A word describing a male of a homosexual persuasion". This makes enough sense…"

"What's that implying?!" Treize yelled from the corner his chair was placed in.

"Basically, Heero you're an ignorant homophobic teenage male, who wants to prove they're, or well…you're not gay…and Treize, according to this, you're gay"

"WHAT?!" both of them yelled in unison

"I'm not gay!" Treize burst out into tears.

"Omae o korosu computer!" Heero took his pistol out of nowhere and aimed it at the computer. well hey, what kind of Gundam Wing fic would it be if Heero didn't threaten to kill something at least once huh?? -

"Heero! NoO…" Une saw what Heero was about to do and threw herself in front of the computer as Heero fired. She grunted and fell into a heap on the floor.

"Heero!" Sally cried, shocked that he would actually shoot. Well really, in retrospect, she was pretty much expecting it but…still!

Une looked up from where she was lying on the floor. "Hey… I'm fine!"

"Huh?" Heero emptied out the ammo and inspected it closely.

"It's a good thing Relena and I decided to replace your bullets with blanks earlier," Quatre piped up.

"You…what?!" Heero yelled. "Wait till I get my hands on you…!"

"Eep," Quatre squeaked before beginning to run for his life. He dodged Heero's first attack and started to run as fas as he could hoping that Heero wouldn't catch up.  They all winced as they heard various noises and crashes resounding from different parts of the house. A series of loud crashes followed by loud profanity (other that Milliardo's) in close succession told Une that they had just crashed her crystal miniatures collection room (literally). Soon after, Quatre came skidding back into the room and took cover behind Noin. Heero walked in, panting for breath.

"Damnit, the Perfect Soldier can't even keep up with a runty 5-year-old pacifist anymore!" Heero cursed. "I must be getting really out of shape," he groaned. "Ah," he eyes lit up as he caught sight of his prey, hiding behind Noin. He advanced slowly, Quatre shivered in fright and hid even more behind Noin. "Come here," Heero said, almost maliciously, but was stopped by Noin's harsh glare.

"Fine, whatever," he dropped his arms and resumed his normal stoic position.

"I AM NOT GAY!" Treize was still throwing his little tantrum.

"Put the damn gag back in…" Heero growled. A little wrestling ensued as Noin attempted to stuff the gag back in his mouth.

"Ow! You fag!" she yelled in pain as he bit her on the hand as a last resort

"Don't call me… mrrrph mrrgh!" Treize's protest was stifled by the stuffage of gag in mouth woot go me, another made up word. He just resigned to looking pissed in the end.

"You know what," Une mused, "I think I have the perfect solution to this little…problem…"

"Oh?" Sally raised an eyebrow.

"Military boot camp"

"Military boot camp huh?" Heero thought about it. "Not a bad idea, not a bad idea at all…"

Treize gave a few muffled noises, signalling he wanted to say something. Rolling her eyes, Une reached over and released the gag.

"I was leader of OZ for years! I don't need military boot camp!"

"Fft… OZ…" Une snorted. "Get with the real military, man! Get in the dirt like a real man and fight hand-to-hand, instead of the sissy way with your robots"

"But…but…" Treize began to tear up again. "I don't wanna go to boot camp! I don't wanna! I don't wanna! I don't wanna!" SEE what I mean by Treize going OOC! -v" he whined, earning him the gag-in-mouth again.

"Military boot camp it is!" Noin agreed. The idea of Treize hitting on  Milliardo again…she shuddered…hey…where was he anyway?

"Hello? He-llo?" Milliardo called out as he (finally) came down the stairs, dressed in a smart casual white shirt and grey pants. Where was everyone? "Noin? Une? Heero?" he tried again, but no response. He wandered around, fingering the ring box in his hand. It took him forever to find it again (having previously hidden it somewhere in his sock drawer) and if Noin wasn't around, he couldn't give it to her and make their engagement official. He slipped the box into his pocket as he walked through room after room of chaotic mess- chairs and tables tipped over, plates and delicate objects smashes on the floor. His eyes widened as he saw the shattered remnants of Une's prized crystal miniatures collection on the hardwood floor. Following the path of the destruction, he finally found them in the computer lab.

"So you finally won the battle against the roses," Une looked up from the computer. "Aww… I just died!" she groaned. Milliardo looked over- she was playing Pacman…

"Er…okay then… " Milliardo looked sceptically at her. "Anyway," he sank down onto one knee again, "Noin, will you do me the honour of granting me your hand in marriage?" he asked, reaching into his pocket for the ring. Where was it? He searched all his other pockets. They weren't there either! He looked around and noticed the stupid grin Duo had plastered across his face.

"Looking for this?" he produced the ring from behind his back

"How the hell did you…? Give that back to me, you squirt!"

"Nah-uh!" Duo dodged Milliardo's grab and scuttled out of the room. Milliardo gave chase and the others soon followed.

"Oh no!" Milliardo cried. "He's headed for the toilet!"

They ran faster but Duo was a boundless ball of energy they just couldn't keep up with! They finally caught up with him in the master bathroom and ran in just in time to see him drop the ring into the toilet

"NO!!" Milliardo cried as, with a mischevious grin and a malicious glint in his eye, little Duo jammed his finger down on the flush button. Using his almost-superhuman reflexes, Milliardo dove forward and shoved his hand into the toilet bowl in an effort to rescue that precious diamond ring before it became wastage history. The last of the water trickled away and Milliardo sighed in relief as he felt the ring in his palm halfway down the pipe.

"Okay Milliardo, you managed to rescue the ring. So get your hand out of that toilet bowl and stand up!" Noin chided him. He pulled and tried to stand up, but he couldn't…he tried again… something was holding him back… like something was stuck…

"Oh shit…" he swore. "Uh Noin… I think my hand is stuck!"

A.N. Whew… 5 ½ pages…in the process of writing these 5 ½ pages I managed to lose my wallet as well… go me…

And someone tell me, is it actually physically possible to get your hand stuck down a toilet?? (I wouldn't know, having never done it myself LOL)