Issue #12 – The Last Laugh

Robin's hand throbbed. It started to swell. He could still move all of his fingers, but he was certain some of them were broken. After Joker had left him, cackling to the point of tears as he walked up the stairs, Robin had lost it. He turned into a feral animal, fierce, growling, roaring in rage. He began pounding on a bar of the cage, punching it, pretending it was the Joker's face. Tiny flecks of blood splattered on the floor below. He heard a crunch. But he kept punching away.

Clang!

Clang!

Clang!

The blows echoed around the room. Each time with Robin screamed louder. His throat ached, and finally his voice gave out. He coughed, threw a few more feeble punches, then collapsed to the cage's floor. His chest heaved, but he shivered and pulled his knees up to his chest. The world went blurry for a moment, and he reached under his mask to wipe away a single tear.

"Conner," he whispered into the dark. The name made his heart heavy. He felt it drop to the bottom of his stomach and shatter. A shiver went up his spine, through his shoulders, and then his whole body shook. He gasped for air, and his body trembled again. Another tear came to his eye. This one slipped out of the mask, down his face, cutting a trail through the paint and dried blood.

"Get it together, Tim," he ordered. He drew a breath, and his body became still. Shut it out. Concentrate. Focus. Except for the rage and sadness in his heart, he had nothing to focus on. So he blanked his mind, became like a dead man, sitting perfectly still with his chest rising only slightly.

This is how the Joker found him. Robin heard the man enter, heard every footstep as the Joker came down the stairs. He didn't open his eyes, but he knew the Joker was only about a yard from the cage. Get a little closer, Robin thought. I'm going to tear out your throat.

Joker took a step. He was within Robin's reach now, but Robin didn't move. Joker stood there, looking around, and he saw the blood on the cage's bar and the droplets which had splattered on the floor. "Typical kid," he mused. "Always making a mess."

Robin struck like a cobra. He ached and had lost much strength, but he was still fast. He sprung forward and shoved his hand between the bars.

And the Joker caught it.

He smiled. "Glad to see you haven't lost your spirit." He kissed Robin's bloodied and broken fingers. "I've come down here to tell you that I'm very pleased with your progress. I think you're almost cured. There's just one final lesson to teach you. And that's about generosity."

Robin sprang forward to kick the Joker in the teeth, but Joker jerked his arm. Robin went sailing face first into the metal bars. The Joker jerked the arm downward. Robin hit the floor, hard, and Joker sat down, holding him there so Robin couldn't get up. He was weak from over two days of brutality and no food, and Joker was deceptively strong.

Joker smiled. "You're a bright kid. I'm sure you're aware that Batman and I have a bit of a history."

The Joker twisted Robin's arm, gently, playing with it more than trying to hurt him. "Bats and I go way back. And we have this sort of game, you see. I go out and cause some mayhem, and he beats up all of my cohorts and sends me back to Arkham. In exchange, I like to do things just to mess with him. You know, just to see if I can get a rise out of the guy. Like covering a crowd on New Years with Joker Venom. Or.." His voice became a hiss. "…murdering his kids." His throat rumbled with a chuckle.

"And this is where you come in, bird boy! See, I'm sure old Bats just has his cape in a big ol' knot worrying about you. Nothing upsets daddy bats more than not knowing where their baby birds are. So I'm going to send him a little message to let him know you're still safe in the care of your Uncle Joker." He smiled and looked over at his free hand. With a bit of sleight of hand, a knife appeared. "This is where you learn about helping others. Because, Robin, you're going to give me…a hand."

Robin tried to jerk away, but Joker put his feet against the cage. With all the Joker's weight bearing down on his broken hand, Robin couldn't move. His body was too beat up, too busted. He tried to push up, but he couldn't, and the Joker started to laugh as he raised the knife then brought it slowly to Robin's wrist. Lower, lower, he drew it out as long as he could. Robin felt the blade against his skin. The skin broke. Warm blood leaked over his wrist, and the blade, ever so slowly, pressed past the first layer of skin.

Robin bit his lip. He tried to blank his mind. Tried to move out of his body. Tried to forget about the pain about to be inflicted.

"I guess you won't be very handy from now on," the Joker laughed.

Suddenly Joker stopped. "Eh? What's that?" Robin heard it too. There was a rumble, a sound like a freight train barreling through a tunnel. For a moment, the ground shook, and then it exploded beneath the Joker. A black and blue streak erupted from it, and Joker went sailing into the air and landed with a thud on top of the cage.

Robin looked up. Hovering where the Joker had just been was Superboy.

"Did somebody call for a dramatic rescue?" Superboy asked.

Robin blinked. Was this real? Was this another one of Joker's tricks? Or had he finally snapped?

"Oh, god…" Superboy gasped, floating down to the cage. "What happened? Are you okay?"

"I'll be fine. It looks a lot worse than it is." Robin's voice was shaky.

Superboy shook his head. Robin looked like death. "Hang on, let's get you out of here." He placed his hands on the metal bars, shut his eyes, and muttered touchdown. Robin almost smirked. It was such a very Conner thing to do, but the bars exploded, leaving a gap large enough for Robin to crawl through. "I contacted the Oracle. She's relaying our position to the other Titans and Batman now. Did you know I had to fly through the sewers to find this place? It's apparently some second level basement, and the ceiling is lined with lead. It was almost impossible to find with the X-ray vision."

Robin tried to push himself up. "You're so much like Superman, these days." Robin half smiled. "X-ray vision. Swooping in just in the nick of time. Dodging bullets with the greatest of ease."

"Dodging bullets?"

"You know, the kryptonite bullet. How did you get away from it?"

"I don't know what you're—"

They heard laughter from the top of the cage.

Superboy looked up and saw Joker pulling himself to his feet. "Robin, dear boy, I'm afraid you fell hook line and sinker for one of the oldest jokes in the book. There never was a kryptonite bullet! You went through all that anguish and grief, breaking your hand over missing your friend for nothing! Ha ha! You had to be quite the yutz to fall for it. A toy horse firing a kryptonite bullet? Come on. That's absurd even for the Joker!"

Superboy clenched his fists. "You're one second away from a body cas—hck!" Superboy gasped and clutched his throat. Blood leaked from between his fingers, and he fell to his knees.

Joker dropped down beside him. "There was one thing I didn't lie about though. It turns out kryptonite is easily fashioned into playing cards." He kicked at Superboy's hand, and there glowing green, stuck in the boy's throat, was a playing card. "Joker's pretty wild, eh?"

Robin growled and lunged forward. He dove from the cage, but his face met something hard, and he sailed back against the metal bars and collapsed on the floor. The Joker twirled a staff around in his fingers. Not just any staff, but Robin's staff.

"I must admit. Before I ditched your costume, I may have ruffled through your pockets a little. And I found some pretty remarkable things. First was this." Joker twirled the staff around and struck a pose from a bad kung-fu movie. "I always did want to be a ninja. And the second was this." He reached into his pocket, and he pulled out a ring which he slipped on his finger.

He flipped open the top, and it emitted a green light. "I must say, you can't find these in a box of Cracker Jacks."

Robin gasped. The ring. Batman had given it to him, insisted he take it. Just in case. It was made of Kryptonite, fashioned from a small piece from the ring Superman had given Batman.

Superboy lay gasping and bleeding on the floor, and the Joker stood over him. He raised the staff over his head, chuckling gleefully, and he struck a blow across Superboy's shoulders. Then he raised his fist, and he punched Superboy with the ring. And then he started pummeling. Superboy's face started to bleed.

Robin pulled himself up. But before he could lunge for an attack, the Joker went sailing across the room.

"Whaaat theee deeeeuuuuce…?" He crashed against the wall and fell to a heap.

Robin blinked for a moment, then he looked up. There stood Kid Flash. Kid Flash stared down at him, muffling a gasp, and then his eyes fell on Superboy. "Oh man… Oh man! We have to get you guys to a doctor!"

Robin shook his head and he kneeled down by Superboy. He ripped off part of Superboy's shirt, removed the playing card, and held the cloth against the wound. "I'm fine. I'll take care of Superboy. You go stop the Joker."

"Are you sure? You don't look fine at all."

"Just don't worry about me."

Kid Flash shrugged. Then he zipped over to the Joker who was just getting to his feet.

"And who are you supposed to be? Did the Flash shrink in the dryer or something?"

"No, actually, my name's Kid Flash. And I'll be kicking your butt today." Kid Flash zipped around the Joker, jabbing with rights and lefts, not hard enough to knock the man out, but just hard enough to hurt and be annoying. Joker tried to bat him away, but he looked like a man losing a fight against a swarm of mosquitoes. Kid Flash laughed, backed off, and stuck his hands on his hips. "Wow, you're not very tough at all, are you?"

"You obnoxious little brat," Joker grumbled. "Don't you know who I am? I'm the Joker!"

"Please." Kid Flash rolled his eyes. "I stopped being afraid of clowns when I was, like, three."

B-Bang! A loud explosion echoed around the room. Like landmines, both of Kid Flash's knees exploded, shooting blood and bits of flesh across the floor. His eyes rolled back in his head. His legs buckled. Joker smiled, and the boy fell to the floor, revealing Harley Quinn behind him, holding two smoking guns.

"Just call me Calamity Jane," she said, blowing smoke from the barrels.

"How about I just call you an ambulance?" Wonder Girl appeared and punched Harley in the stomach. The woman went sailing across the room. When she hit the ground, she bounced.

"Ooow!" Harley moaned, clutching her side and standing. She yowled. "You stupid little girl! Don't you realize I'm mortal? I don't have the big fancy superpowers. I'm no match for you!"

Wonder Girl smiled. "Aw, I know." She flew at Harley, aiming another punch. But just before it landed, Harley pulled the tazer from behind her back. It caught Wonder Girl in the throat, shooting electricity through her body, and the girl fell to the floor.

Joker applauded. "Good show, Harley!"

"Thanks, Mistah J.!"

"See, Robin, here's something else we have in common. We're always being underestimated. Just because we don't have fancy powers, every wacko in a bright costume or cape just thinks they can walk all over us. It's kind of funny, if you think about it, because one time…" Joker stopped. He felt someone tapping him on the shoulder. He turned, and he looked into the scowling face of Nightwing.

"Oh, it's you." Joker sighed. "This is really going to hurt, isn't it?"

Nightwing's fist struck Joker across the face. A bloody tooth sailed through the air as the Joker reeled backward. "Yep," Joker said, staggering. "I was right." Another blow, and Joker went down. Nightwing growled and kneeled over him.

"You hurt the kids. I hurt you." He pulled his fist back, and he threw it hard into the Joker's chest. Joker choked, but then he smiled. Nightwing pulled his fist back and he looked at it. A tiny drop of blood appeared on his glove.

Joker unbuttoned his jacket, and attached to his chest was a tiny needle. "Joker Venom," he said offhandedly.

Nightwing's face twisted into a grin, and he fell over. It started as a rumble in his throat, a mere chuckle, but then he was howling with laughter. He groped for his belt, and he pulled out a small vile. He tried to bring it to his lips.

"Oh, no you don't." The Joker kicked it, and it slid across the floor. He sat down beside Nightwing, and he watched the young man gasp for air between fits laughter. "Say…did you ever hear the one about the two cows? One says, 'Moo!' and the other says, 'Jerk, I was going to say that!'" He slapped Nightwing on the back as Nightwing howled with laughter. "Or how about the guy who walked into the doctor's office with a carrot in his ear and a piece of celery in his nose. The doctor said he wasn't eating right!" Joker punched Nightwing in the face as the man rolled, still cackling, now with tears streaming down his face. "Oh, kid, I like you. You always were more fun than Batman. You always appreciated a good joke. In fact, you'll probably appreciate this. You're going to be the third partner Batman's lost. And Robin over there will be number four. The second and third ones this year, and the second and third ones done by me specifically! Aren't I such a card?" He leapt up, and he kicked Nightwing in the ribs.

Nightwing absorbed it. Then he looked up. The vial of antidote wasn't far away. He started to claw at the floor, very slowly moving towards it.

Joker placed his hands on his hips and paced around, eying the carnage which had just erupted. Then he threw his arms into the air and shouted, "Where are you, Batman? I know you're out there. I brutally tortured your kid, whooped most of the Teen Titans. I know you're out there in the shadows, waiting. Why don't you show yourself and fight like a real man? Where are you, Batman?"

There was a thwack. Joker looked up, and he saw Harley collapse to the floor. Robin stood behind her, clutching his staff. The bat insignia on his chest seemed to glow. Behind his mask, his eyes were filled with rage. His heart had turned as cold as stone. "I'm right here."

"You? Ha! You're not Batman. You're just kid playing dress up. But oh well." Joker reached behind his back, there was a sound, and he pulled out his Joker cane. "If it's a whoopin' you're a-wantin'..."

Robin charged him. Joker blocked the first blow, swung, but Robin easily blocked it. Joker tried to sweep Robin's legs, but Robin jumped, swung again, but the Joker blocked. Robin jabbed, and Joker pushed it up, but when he did, he left himself open, and Robin's foot landed square in Joker's gut. The staff connected right under Joker's chin, and another tooth went sailing through the air as he stumbled and fell backwards.

"Not bad for an amateur," Joker said drunkenly. Then the air left his body as Robin landed on his stomach. Robin grabbed him by the collar and threw a fist into his face.

"That was for my mom!" Another punch. Joker's head spun. "That was for my dad!" Whack! This time in the teeth. "That was for Stephanie!" There was a loud crack, and Joker's nose started to gush blood. "That was for Jason! And this one's for Barbara! And Sarah Gordon!" Wham! Smack! Whack! "And what you just did to Superboy! And Kid Flash! And Wonder Girl!" Each shout was followed by another harsh blow straight to the Joker's face. His pale skin became crimson. Blood dyed his hair red. "This is for what you did to my friends! And my family! This is for Nightwing! And every time you've taken something away from Batman!" He pulled his fist back, aiming it like a sniper. "And this…this is for every time one of you sickos has hurt somebody innocent." Wham. "Every time someone has cried because one of you whackos hurt a loved one." Smack! "I'm not going to let you hurt anyone else, do you hear me?" Wham. Smack. Whack. "Do you hear me?" Robin's words became lost in an animal growl, and his fists pummeled the Joker over and over and over until it made sounds like he was punching wet meat.

"Robin."

Robin kept screaming. Kept punching.

"Robin!"

Screaming. Punching. Just blind rage.

"Tim." Robin pulled back for another punch, but something grabbed his fist. He growled, turned, ready to pounce, and towering over him was a tall man in a dark cloak.

Through the rage, Robin didn't recognize him at first.

Batman didn't seem to recognize him either.

"Get away from me!" Robin exclaimed, jerking his hand free. He stumbled past Batman, and he saw everyone standing around him. Catwoman. Batgirl. Nightwing had stumbled to his feet, still breathing heavily, leaning on Starfire. Beast Boy was a gorilla, cradling Kid Flash in his arms. Kid Flash winced and clutched his knees. Superboy coughed and leaned on Wonder Girl who didn't look too stable herself. And there was Raven. She covered her mouth.

They didn't say anything. But their eyes cut through him. Their mouths hung open slightly. They looked terrified, like their blood was running cold.

Robin looked back at the Joker. The clown was a mess. His face bubbled with each breath. Robin looked down at himself, white, bruised, battered. Covered in his own dried blood. Covered in wet blood from the Joker. His hand throbbing. His chest aching. He was naked. Cold. Exposed in front of everyone he had left.

He felt hands on his back, and a cloak draped over his shoulders. He pulled it around himself. Batman had given him his cape. He looked up at the man, into his eyes. Though they were hidden behind the mask, Robin could still feel them. He could still sense them. He knew Bruce's eyes looked down on him in disappointment. Robin shook. Robin's body trembled, and he fell forward. Batman caught him, actually wrapped his arms around him, and held Robin close to his chest.

I blew it. I couldn't handle things. And now I'm breaking down. Sobbing. Not like Robin. Not like a good soldier. Like a helpless kid who got in over his head. I…I…I was so scared…. I'm sorry I was scared.

Then he felt hands run through his hair. Nightwing kneeled beside them and put an arm over his back. Batgirl kneeled down and touched his shoulder. Bruce, of all people, held him the closest. And he whispered, "It's okay, Tim. You're going to be okay."