At The End of The Day
Authors Thoughts: Well there's been parts of this story that I know have been very cliché and this chapter starts off with more of that. Just remember that Lucas/Peyton/Brooke are not the story here, they are props to the story. So whatever is going on with them is usually to support the cause of Nathan and Haley, as you will see in this chapter. It's cliché for Lucas and the two girls (and it's slightly based off a TV storyline but tweaked to fit my story), but hopefully I made up for it and Nathan and Haley's part wasn't too cliché. This chapter sort of ends back on square 1 in a way…so what's going to happen next? ;-)
Chapter 15"Don't ever feel that you're alone
I'll never let you down, I'll never leave you dry
Don't fall apart, don't let it go
Carry the notion, carry the notion back to me, to me..." –"Feeling A Moment" Feeder"Haley, Haley, open the door!"
It was Valentine's Day and Brooke was supposed to be out with Lucas, but instead she was knocking on Haley's door.
Haley turned the knob as quickly as she could as Brooke came in a hand over her face and mouth wiping away at tears.
"Brooke what's wrong?" Haley's voice was full of concern as Brooke sat down on the bed properly, and didn't sprawl herself across it in a carefree manner as was her usual style.
"I found out something, and I don't know what to do with it, and you're the only person I can talk to about it."
Haley rubbed her hand on Brooke's shoulder, "You know you can tell me anything. What happened?"
"Can I ask you something first? Do you think I'm a bad girlfriend?"
"What? Brooke no of course not you're wonderful to Lucas, you're always so understanding and…"
"Well see it's funny you say that," Brooke cut her off, "I'm trying to be extremely understanding right now but I don't know if I can be," she sniffled back tears.
Haley looked at her confused having no clue what she was talking about and that was Brooke's cue to continue. "I found out that on New Years, when Peyton was drunk, she kissed Lucas," Brooke stated the words calmly, but her jaw was shaking.
Haley's eyes widened in surprise, "What? Are you serious? But I thought he got roped into kissing some business associate's daughter or something."
"Yeah he told me about that and I thought it was funny but this I'm having trouble finding the humor in it."
Haley ran her hands through her hair, "Ok wait first tell me what happened. How'd you find out?"
"I walked into Lucas' room and they were there talking, Lucas and Peyton that is. He was supposed to have come to my room to pick me up but when he was late I went to his room and found him talking to Peyton very hush-hush about something. So I confronted them and Lucas told me he had been letting Peyton know that he wanted to be honest with me about everything and that he was going to tell me that on New Years Peyton got really drunk and kissed him."
"Wow," Haley blew out a breath, "I had no idea about any of that."
"Me neither," Brooke shook her head sadly taking a deep breath. "And the thing is, I can understand getting drunk and doing something stupid but it's different this time right? I mean they have a history Haley, a big one, that I've heard a lot about and you know me, you're the only one who knows me and how insecure I get about it. Lucas and Peyton have a connection and now I find out they've been keeping this secret since New Years and it just makes me wonder what else are they hiding?"
"Oh Brooke you don't think Lucas has been hiding more than that do you? He loves you Brooke he wouldn't do that to you," Haley reassuringly rubbed Brooke's arm.
"But I have a right to be mad right? Or do I have to be the perfect understanding girlfriend here? I mean I don't want to be mad but I am. I'm mad at Peyton for doing it and I'm mad at Lucas for not telling me sooner."
"But he was planning on telling you doesn't that count for something?"
Brooke concentrated her vision on a stained spot on the carpet floor of the room. "Why were they in there alone Haley?" she spoke softly. "Why was my boyfriend late to pick me up for our Valentine's Day date because he was talking to his ex in his room alone, with the door locked?" Brooke's voice cracked and Haley had to admit it looked bad.
"I don't want to think the worst Haley," tears spilled out of her eyes, "But you know about Brian." Brian had been Brooke's boyfriend in high school. He'd cheated on her and hurt her and it was why it had taken Brooke so long to give Lucas a chance with her heart. "I know, I know Lucas isn't Brian," she spoke through gritted teeth as if trying to convince herself, "But he's still a guy. And lately he and I have been so distant, so busy with our own lives to get a few moments alone with each other and yet he was talking to his ex and late to pick me up. And that's just the thing, no matter how much he loves me, he's always going to have that connection with her. I love Peyton she's a good friend to me, or at least was but I don't know how I should feel about this." Brooke's tears spilled down her cheeks and Haley fought back her own at seeing her friend so distressed. It hurt Haley when her friends were hurting and she could see how visibly upset Brooke was.
Haley's hand dropped from rubbing circles on Brooke's back when she suddenly got up and picked up her purse. "I need some air," she headed for the door.
"Brooke…"
"I'm ok," she smiled, "Thanks for listening and not judging, I just need to clear my head for a little while. You're the best Hales." Brooke walked back by Haley and enveloped her in a huge hug before walking out of the room.
Haley didn't bother knocking as she sped right into Lucas' room calling his name, completely forgetting that it was Nathan's room as well. From the bathroom Nathan heard her voice and his face contorted in confusion at Haley's yelling out Lucas' name. She hadn't been to their room since…well, everything happened and suddenly there she was and she couldn't stop calling for Lucas.
"He's not here," Nathan said walking out of the bathroom causing Haley to jump in place as his voice startled her.
"Sorry I didn't mean to scare you. Lucas isn't here."
Haley rubbed her forehead at the overwhelming emotions in her right now. She'd totally blanked on the fact that Nathan could be here when she stormed in and now here he was in the room just a few feet away from her…talking to her.
"I um, I'm sorry I didn't mean to barge in I uh forgot you could be here so I'll just…" she pointed towards the door keeping her head down and headed in its direction until his voice halted her.
"Haley wait," he waited for her to look at him, "Whatever you had to say to Lucas was clearly important, I can give him a message if you want."
"No it's um," she shook her head with a small bitter laugh, "It's probably none of my business anyway but I just needed to confront him about something and it sort of has to be face to face."
He nodded, "Oh…ok," he replied awkwardly.
Haley bit her lip and lifted her eyes up to meet his, "It's not my business but Brooke's my best friend and hell she buts in my life I can but into hers. Has Lucas said anything to you about Peyton?" Haley asked him straight out, her hands on her hips.
He couldn't help the slight smirk that crept on his face at seeing her old mannerism. "What about Peyton?"
"Is he cheating on Brooke with her?"
Nathan's eyes grew big, "Whoa where'd that come from?"
"Well apparently they kissed at New Years and didn't tell Brooke and then he was going to tell her but apparently they've been sneaking around keeping secrets and it scares Brooke to think…" Haley's voice began to crack and Nathan's eyebrows furrowed together at Haley's reaction, you'd think she was Brooke the way she seemed to be taking it so personally. "I mean I don't know maybe she's paranoid or maybe I'm jumping to conclusions but considering what my dad did I just…" Haley turned her head away as Nathan stepped forward closer to her, a tentative hand reaching up to touch her shoulder.
"Hey, Haley it's ok, I don't think my cousin is the type to cheat, but I'm sorry this is bringing up old wounds," he spoke softly and Haley sighed. It was this voice she missed hearing, not that cold finite one he'd used that night weeks ago. They hadn't talked this much since then and between Brooke's issues, her own feelings on the subject, and talking to Nathan again, Haley was experiencing a rollercoaster of emotions.
She wiped at the corners of her eyes, "Well you don't have to be sorry about that, and old wounds are just that, old. After some time you begin to become numb to it all."
He caught her meaning. She was saying that eventually you got used to everything…used to people disappointing you, used to not having that person in your life anymore. But he hadn't become numb to her no. He'd missed her company and her friendship. The sting of her words had softened and the torch in his heart had practically burned out, but the only thing that still hurt was the fear that he'd lost a great friend in the process. He and Haley were friends first and foremost and he didn't realize how much he'd missed that until this very moment. Here he was standing next to Haley, his hand lazily lingering on her shoulder, her face sad, and it'd been weeks since they'd been this close. Yet here they were talking about things the way they'd always been able to, the way they'd always done in the past.
He'd missed that the most. He and Haley could have great conversations from the most serious of topics to which Captain Crunch cereal flavor was the best. It was just the way they were, and he hadn't been able to really find anyone he could talk with the way he could with Haley. Talking was what they did best. That was what they were about, from the first time they hung out alone playing pool, they just talked. They were friends who talked and it was all so much simpler then before he let feelings get in the way. Feelings he wasn't even sure he had anymore. Standing in front of her now he realized he missed the friend more than he did the girl. He wanted his friend back.
"Haley I…"
"I missed you Nathan," she blurted out vulnerably and he released a breath that seemed to take a huge weight he'd been carrying around off his shoulders.
"Me too Hales, I'm sorry I acted like a jerk that night it was just…something that got a little out of control but…"
She didn't let him finish apologizing as she threw her arms around him and leapt up embracing him in a massive hug. He laughed as he wrapped his arms around her and her feet lifted in the air because of their height difference.
"God I missed you Nathan, I missed talking to one of my best friends."
He heard the sincerity in her voice and he knew that none of it had been fake. Whatever the freshman comment was about had been referring to the idea of something more with them, but it didn't matter now. He missed his friendship with Haley more than anything and he wanted her back in his life even if she would only be that: his friend.
"I missed you too Hales," he replied as he set her back down on the ground.
She smiled at the way he said her name, in that shortened version that she loved hearing come out of his mouth.
"So how's your life been?" she laughed noting how the question sounded.
He laughed too, "Stressful but fun. Basketball is so great even though coach is going crazy prepping us for March but I'm excited to get to play and be on TV and stuff," he grinned, "It's a lot of fun."
"I'll bet."
"What about you, what have you been up to?"
"Just trying to keep up the GPA, the usual, same old boring me," she rolled her eyes with a smile.
"You're not boring Haley, un-cool maybe but not boring," he teased earning himself a mini punch on the arm from Haley which considering their opposing sizes didn't do much.
"Whatever, 5 minutes into a renewed friendship and you're already teasing me," she stated incredulously.
"It's too much fun for me," he laughed as she narrowed her eyes.
She smiled back at him too elated that she and Nathan were talking again to be able to say anything else. It wasn't that she really wanted to leave but Brooke might be looking for her and she had her loyalties. Besides things were finally good with Nathan again and she wanted to enjoy the moment and get out before she somehow screwed it up again. "Well I actually should probably go back in case Brooke needs an ice-cream and chocolate therapy session in my room so I'll see you around?" she smiled wide knowing she would.
He nodded, "I'll be seeing you Haley James."
Exiting the room with a smile on her face Haley sighed in relief, her friend was back.
Nathan sighed for the same reason, and realized that while he wasn't entirely over that girl, he was getting there and hopefully he'd reach that place so things didn't have to get this messy again. Because even if they were just friends, he needed Haley in his life and more importantly, he wanted her in it.