Because She was a Child No More
by: Eyes-of-Pearl
Disclaimer: Chronicles of Narnia belong to its respective owners.
Rating: K
Author's Note and Synopsis: Some of you may recognize this. This was originally posted under a separate fic with the same title. However, after revisions and some corrections, I have decided to just repost this as a second chapter to my original story, "Because She was Pretty." There are too many parallels anyways and because of the similarities in titles, I think it would be more appropriate by combining the two under a single fic. Please, if you read the last version of 'Because She was a Child No More,' there are slight changes with a different tone set for the ending.
In addition, this can be viewed as a companion story to "Mirror Illusions," but you don't have to read that to understand this. Written from Edmund's perspective, he tries to understand Susan's feelings after leaving Narnia and came to the conclusion that when you are considered grown up, you are not supposed to make-believe. Susan-Edmund sibling fic.
Because She was a Child No More
When you were young, it was perfectly acceptable to pass a lazy afternoon with only your toy figures and little bit of imagination. For when you are a child, it was ok to believe in St. Nicholas just because you got exactly what you asked for on Christmas day. Words like the tooth-fairy and Easter bunnies never sound ridiculous when spoken by a child. But, when you were considered a 'grown-up' by social norms, such imaginations were frowned upon and ridiculed as being frivolous.
Before Narnia, he had been an awkward child, never quite fit in with other boys his age. Then, the war began, taking his father away. It left him with his three other siblings and his mother in their London home.
Peter, being the oldest, had fulfilled the fatherly role. He was always the defender, carrying with him the aura of majesty. Courageous against adversity, leadership became him. As the second youngest, Edmund knew that he did not make Peter's tasks any easier. Still, Peter was fiercely loyal even through the greatest of obstacles.
Lucy, his youngest sister with her toothy smile, personified eternal innocence and optimism. She was a child at heart. It was little wonder why she was the first out of the Penvensie children to step through the magical wardrobe into Narnia. To her, it was a place that was as real as her right hand. Even after her return, her faith never waned.
Lucy's outward behaviour was a stark contrast with his other sister, Susan. He had little in common with her. He always thought that she was too nagging about what to do and not to do. For her, there must be a logical explanation to everything, black and white. She acknowledged the differentials of gray, but could not understand it.
When he returned to the "true" Narnia with Peter and Lucy, he would often find himself reminiscing. He didn't have many fond childhood memories. However, he learned to treasure the precious few that he had. When he and Lucy were still young enough to beg for bedtime stories, it was Susan who would concede to their pleas. Sometimes, she would read from a large volume of text, but the best were the one that she made up. He suspected that Peter also enjoyed those tales that filled their heads with picturesque images of distant lands and fantastic creatures.
As the years passed, the stories became less. Susan was old enough to take on more responsibilities. She helped mother with the chores, taking care of the 'children' - him and Lucy, going to school, keeping up with her studies. When the war came, it was up to her to provide the emotional support where mother could not. She soothed hurts and tender hearts, held their hands and offered kisses upon foreheads as if they would solve all problems. If Peter was the defender, the epitome of strength, then Susan was the protector, the nurturer, and the gentle.
That was how Narnians viewed the elder Daughter of Eve. Queen Susan had became a mother-like figure to them all, from fellow monarchs, to mermaids, fauns to drolls, centaurs to beavers. She naturally took on her responsibilities and was loved and respected for her maturity and grace. In a way, even though she was grown up, she was still able to live her own fantasies, like the way she used to tell it in her own make-believe.
Everything changed, when Susan was told by Aslan that she couldn't return. She was growing up. It had been so easy for Susan to just write off everything. She didn't want to hear about their days in Narnia, stories that he and Lucy would recall and retell nearly after night at bedtime. It was time to grow up, she told them, Peter included.
Upon retrospect, Edmund would say that his initial reaction was anger until he realized that Susan could never go back to being just a child like him and Lucy. It was only ok for children to use their imaginations and make-believe about a Golden Age, of kings and queens fighting in glorious battles. However, reality was what she saw in the mirror, a woman in a world that deemed her as being 'old enough' to socialize with other adults. At the same time, she had obligations to help take care of everyone and everything, while maintaining her appearances.
But, there were odds times that he caught her unawares. She would allow herself indulge in a moment of fantasy, to laugh for the sake of laughing not to smile to please others. Sometimes, he would catch her looking outside with wistfulness and longing and then for no apparent reason giggle liked a young school girl. More rarely, she would tell him stories. Once, when he came down with a nasty cold and was bedridden during for a week, she had tended to him. Combing strands of hair away from his fevered brow, she leaned close and whispered.
Her voice was comforting as she began to weave the intricate elements of what turned out to be an epic. Edmund would later wonder if Susan herself knew that she was telling the story of a gentle queen whose skills with a bow and arrow was renowned in a place called Narnia.
AN: So, how was that? Please r/r.