Sango was nervous after she sent Inuyasha that message. Part of her recognized that she was being brash, being so bold with him. The other part of her? The jealous part? The angry part?

That part didn't give a single fuck.

Inuyasha was insufferable, as a person, as a friend, and as an employer. His friendship with Miroku was beginning to take a toll on her, and Sango silently wondered how many other women had been in her position.

How many other women have felt rejected, because Miroku spends all his time with his best friend? How many other women have had to sit down with Inuyasha and talk to him, make him understand? He didn't own Miroku. He had no claim over him.

Miroku was his friend and publicist, nothing more.

When Inuyasha sat down across from her, everything that she was going to say disappeared from her mind.

Sango watched Inuyasha shift in his seat, legs spread, leaning back. He kissed his teeth and looked her over. "Can I help you, Sango?" His tone was stern, curt. His words cut into her.

Inuyasha didn't like her very much, Sango could tell. She sputtered, blinking rapidly. Inuyasha raised his eyebrows at her.

"What's with the hoodie?"

"It's been a hard day." Inuyasha said with a guffaw. "Just tryin' to survive today." He muttered, looking down at his hands for a brief moment before looking back up at her. He sniffed.

"But it's August—"

"I just wanted to wear one, alright?" He spat. He was starting to get defensive, Sango could tell by the strain in his voice. "So, did I come here to be judged by you, or what?"

So he knows why he's here? Sango sighed as she sat back, running a hand through her hair. "I just need to talk to you."

"About?"

"Miroku."

Inuyasha practically rolled his eyes. He knew why he was here, he knew exactly why he was here. He was going to get blamed for something that happened between them.

It wouldn't be the first time he's blamed for a relationship having issues. "Listen he hung up on you because he wanted to, not because I forced—"

"But in a way you did, Inuyasha," Sango responded, crossing her arms over her chest. "You showed up, unannounced—"

"Since when was it a crime to show up at your best friend's house, unannounced? I'm sure you and Kagome did the same thing before you moved in together."

"That's not the issue, the issue is…"

Inuyasha raised his eyebrows at her, daring her to keep talking. "The issue is what?"

Sango shook her head. "I just…feel like…you're such a priority to Miroku, and you take up so much of his time…sometimes I resent you."

She was met with silence.

Inuyasha felt his skin grow cold, he stuffed his hands into the pocket of his hoodie. He didn't need to hear this, not right now. "Wow…" Inuyasha breathed, shaking his head. "You…resent…me?"

Sango immediately regretted those words. "I don't mean—"

"Sango."

The way Inuyasha said her name made a shiver go down her spine. She didn't like the sudden coldness in his voice, the way his eyes narrowed at her, and the seething anger that was behind them.

"Inuyasha all I mean is that…your dependency on Miroku for almost everything has put a strain on my relationship with him. It's clouding my view of who you are, too. When I think of you, all I feel is jealousy and…disappointment."

"Is it because I'm spending more time with Kagome, too?" Inuyasha asked, leaning forward a little bit. "Are you angry at me because I'm spending so much time with both of them, hm? Do you feel lonely? Rejected? Replaced?"

Sango gulped.

She was supportive of Kagome, she was. But the kiss at his birthday party was not a regular kiss. Kagome kissed him like she wanted to kiss him, it wasn't a kiss that was meant for the cameras. That amount of desperation and total physical resignation into Inuyasha was not meant to be shared with the public.

That kiss showed her that Kagome's relationship with Inuyasha was growing. It was giving way to something…bigger.

Scarier.

She was scared, that's what she felt. The way that Kagome had become completely lost in Inuyasha, even just for that moment at his birthday party, was scary.

She's never seen Kagome look at someone with so much adoration, so much care. It was like she was drunk on him.

And she spent all her time denying that there ever even was a look in her eyes that night, but there was. Sango knew there was.

So yes, Sango was scared. Of losing her best friend.

"I…no…"

"Sure," Inuyasha responded sarcastically, nodding his head. "I would be too if I were you."

"I'm not jealous of you, I would just appreciate it if you—"

"Backed off a little, right?" Inuyasha interjected, finishing her thought for her. Sango nodded her head warily. "Cool."

"Look I…" She paused, taking in a deep breath before continuing, "I know…you guys are close and you came here together but…it's hard to have a relationship with someone when there's that third person involved." She muttered, playing with the ends of her hair. "Miroku is always stressed out and trying to clean up your messes, he does so much for you. And I'm left with whatever little bit of energy he has at the end of the day, on the lucky ones that you don't call."

There was a pause. Inuyasha considered her words.

Okay.

He could see where she was coming from. "He's my publicist." Inuyasha pushed, crossing his arms. "I need to talk to him. Every day."

"Maybe you wouldn't if your life wasn't such a mess," Sango muttered, glaring at Inuyasha. He glared back at him.

The feelings were—undoubtedly—mutual.

"You have no idea what my life is like, Sango."

"I'm in it, by proxy," Sango replied, looking down at the table. She sighed, "Look…just…back off a little bit, alright?"

But Inuyasha wasn't really paying attention just now. He responded, he knew what she was saying but the words weren't really reaching his ears. Resentment still rang in them.

Resentment.

Sango resented him.

He shrugged and nodded. "Yeah, that's fine." And then there was a pause, neither of them moving from the table.

"I'm sorry," Sango muttered, looking down at her hands. "I didn't mean to say I resented you, only that—"

"You're jealous," Inuyasha said, although his eyes were glazed over. "Jealousy gives way to resentment, though." He switched over to a language he was more comfortable speaking, Japanese.

Unfortunately for Sango, her Japanese was rusty compared to Miroku's and Kagome's. She understood what he said, but wasn't sure what the appropriate words to say were. So instead she shook her head. "That was rude of me." She repeated, in Japanese now.

She could actually see him, now. She saw the way his shoulders slumped, the way he seemed to be just a tad smaller than he really was. The look in his eyes was the same as someone who was just tired. To their very core, they—he—was tired. "Are you alright?"

Inuyasha took in a breath before responding. "Just fine."

Sango shook her head. Realization hit her.

He needed Miroku.

"No, Inuyasha…are you alright?" She asked again, emphasizing the word alright.

It was so little.

Yet so significant.

Her words hit him like a fucking truck, and he took another deep breath. "I'm fine." He responded, looking away from her. "Are we done here?" He was avoiding the question, trying to find a way out, but Sango was blocking his way with the question.

"Yeah, we're done here," Sango said weakly, eyes barely flicking as he rose. Somehow he was back to his normal height. He didn't seem weak and tired anymore. "Inuyasha—"

The sound of his name coming out of her mouth made him turn around, an eyebrow raised. An unspoken question hanging in the air.

What now?

"...Thank you." Sango said, "for…not blowing up on me."

"I'm used to it," Inuyasha mumbled. He sniffled again, his thumb coming up to wipe under his nose. His face wrinkled up a little bit before a deeper sniff followed. "Bye."

Sango didn't say anything in return, she simply watched Inuyasha leave Cafeium.

He got in his car, head hitting against the headrest for a moment. He grabbed his phone from his pocket and sent off a message.

Yo.

A few seconds later, a person answered his test message.

[Bankotsu: ? Yeah?]

And then there was a follow-up message.

[Bankotsu: Do you need more?]

Inuyasha snorted at the word. Need.

He didn't need it. He wanted it.

There was a difference.

Needing something meant that he couldn't stop, wouldn't stop. It was a subconscious urge, like eating, breathing, or needing water. Need implied that Inuyasha wanted it in the same way he wanted food when he was hungry.

That wasn't the case.

Alcohol was something he needed. He knew that, he had accepted that about himself years ago.

But alcohol was always so depressing. It made him contemplate things he didn't when he was high.

Alcohol was mean. Alcohol told him that he wasn't going to amount to anything. Alcohol told him that he was a piece of shit. A waste of space in the world.

Alcohol made him truly feel part of the 7 billion people there are on earth. Just a speck in the universe on a giant floating rock.

Cocaine was different, cocaine made him happy. Cocaine made him feel like he was better. Life was going to get better. It gave him hope, made him happy, made him feel stronger, faster.

But that wasn't why he texted Bankotsu.

You got…anything else?

Inuyasha could practically see Bankotsu's reaction.

I need something to make me pass out.

"Inuyasha."

"Do you have it?"

"No," Bankotsu said, tossing his bag aside.

Inuyasha's eyes darkened. "Then why are you here?"

"Listen, you're trying to get into some dangerous stuff, Inuyasha. I'm trying to help you."

"Bankotsu," Inuyasha muttered, shaking his head. "What is it with everyone telling me I look rough today? What is it with everyone asking me if I'm alright, lately?" He was growing more and more frustrated. His fingers carded through his hair, tugging at the ends. "I'm fucking fine."

Bankotsu dragged a hand down his face, "Fuck, Inuyasha, are you really gonna make me do this to you? Right now?"

He took a deep breath and then spoke. "You look like you and death got into a fight, and you won."

Inuyasha didn't respond, so Bankotsu kept going. "Listen…I'm not exactly excited about being a drug dealer again, especially not to you. But I would rather you get your shit from me than anyone else. At least I know my stuff is just cocaine, nothing else. But…dude…you haven't looked all that great in days. You look wasted, and you're acting like you are too. You've been showing up to the gym later and later, and when you do you have two different personalities. You're either talkative and happy to be there, or you're downright fucking miserable and act like a diva."

Inuyasha set his jaw. He needed a drink. He got up to go pour himself one when Bankotsu held up a finger. "Stay right there," He ordered.

"Get out of my apartment, Bankotsu."

"Inuyasha, you're on a bender. You have been for 3 days. Are you high right now?"

Inuyasha let out a hiccup. "Drunk."

"Take a fucking nap, bro," Bankotsu responded, taking a step forward, but Inuyasha shook his head.

"Today has been…really…really…really hard, Bankotsu." Inuyasha's eyes darted toward the bag that was thrown lazily into the armchair in a corner. "You have no idea,"

"I do know, because Renkotsu told me." Bankotsu admitted, "I know what you've done today. I know you faked a drug test. I know everything."

There was a delay in Inuyasha's response, "yeah, and earlier today I had to fuckin' talk to Sango."

"For what?"

"She's jealous I'm stealing her boyfriend or something." Inuyasha waved his hand dismissively as he got up. "I don't remember the exact details. I'm tired." He yawned as if to show that he was, and then sighed. "Could use something to put me to sleep, I haven't been sleeping well lately."

"Because you've spent the last three days on a cocaine and alcohol binge," Bankotsu said, but his words didn't hold their usual bite. He didn't give Inuyasha any hint of frustration. He was just…stating a fact.

And here's another fact: It's all Bankotsu's fault.

But he wasn't about to admit that, not right now. Not when he was trying to keep Inuyasha away from another beast entirely.

"I'm not sourcing anything like that for you."

Inuyasha's hair fell over his back as he looked over, eyes trailing over Bankotsu. "Then I'll get it elsewhere." He stumbled over his steps as he tried to reach the kitchen. "I'll take my chances."

"Oxycodone isn't a joke, Inuyasha."

"And cocaine is?"

Bankotsu blinked at his words.

"I just want to sleep, Bankotsu," Inuyasha muttered. "Cocaine makes me jumpy."

"Then don't do it," Bankotsu responded. He knew he was kicking himself in the ass right now. He knew that by agreeing not to supply Inuyasha with cocaine, he would lose his one chance to get away from him.

The door was right in front of him, he had his hand on the doorknob. He remembered Naraku's voice when he explained the plan to him. It was simple. Straightforward.

Supply Inuyasha with cocaine. Get him addicted, leave when he loses.

That's it.

And for his whole life, or at least, the portion of his life that Inuyasha had been involved with, Inuyasha never deviated away from alcohol. Or, well.

He shouldn't say 'never'.

That was until he decided he wanted something more. That was cocaine.

And now cocaine wasn't enough. He wanted more. He wanted Oxydocone.

That sent a shiver down his spine.

"It's not that easy."

"I know," Bankotsu admitted. "But…I can't keep supplying you, dude. You're asking me for something I don't feel like dealing with. That shit is…it gets dark, Inuyasha."

Life's dark already, what's a little more?

"Today was hard, Bankotsu," Inuyasha repeated, shaking his head. "I'm trying to swear it off…I am. But…I can't. I just…I need a little more."

"So you haven't done cocaine today?" The conversation was becoming a little weird. A little unsettling. He discreetly took his phone out of his pocket. Inuyasha shook his head. "But you also haven't slept?"

"And it's been a hard day." Inuyasha added, nodding his head. "It's been a really hard day and I just want to sleep. Can I sleep?"

"You can sleep, you don't need Oxy to sleep, bro."

Inuyasha wasn't letting up. He knew what he wanted. He was going to get it eventually.

Bankotsu waited until Inuyasha turned around and reached for a glass from the cabinet before he sent off a message to Miroku.

[I'm at Inu's. He's in bad shape. Says he wants to sleep.]

It took less than a minute for Miroku to respond.

[Miroku: What the fuck did he mean by 'sleep'?]

Bankotsu bit down on his lower lip, eyes flickering up and over to Inuyasha. He was too busy trying to balance himself.

[He wants Oxy.]

[Miroku: Oxy?]

[Oxy…oxycodone. Like Oxycontin.]

Inuyasha looked over, "what are you doing?" he asked. Bankotsu was quick to look up from his phone, a lie conjuring up in seconds.

"Got a text from Renkotsu, we ran out of pre-workout. He asked for more."

Inuyasha squinted at him, but then nodded. "You know…this isn't the life I wanted."

Bankotsu squinted at him. "What do you mean?"

Inuyasha smiled at him, a sad smile, but still. "I hate it. I hate this shit."

"Hate what shit?"

"I feel like a goddamn puppet all the time, Bankotsu. I'm always doing what other people want me to do, I'm always being fucking dragged through the mud in the media. People always expect so much of me. I can't even breathe without a camera being in my fucking face. I can't fight without there being a worry in my head about a career-ending injury. I can't function properly. I'm on autopilot."

It was quiet for a minute. "I never wanted to be…this big. If I were to sit down 17…18-year-old me in the living room and show him my bank account balance he would be so fucking happy. But he'd be sad to know I'm not…better." His eyes darkened, "I don't think I ever will be."

"You have people to help," Bankotsu said, "I'm here, Renkotsu, Myoga—"

"Myoga doesn't want me back in the gym until I'm clean," Inuyasha interjected, he seemed disappointed in himself. "I can't be clean. Clean means life becomes harder. I don't want life to get harder. It's hard enough." And then Inuyasha corrected himself. "I…don't have a problem."

"You won't if you stop," Bankotsu warned him, his arms crossing over his chest. He briefly looked out the floor-to-ceiling windows, watching the sunset over the city. "You can still stop."

Every time he suggested that possibility, his body hurt as if yelling at him to take it back. Don't put that idea in his head!

Inuyasha nodded. "I did when we were in Vermont…worst month of my life…well…almost."

Bankotsu was distracted by the message that flashed across his screen.

[I'm otw. Don't leave till I get there.]

Great, now I'm on babysitter duty.

"Things get better, Inuyasha. Drugs aren't always the answer."

"Yeah," Inuyasha responds, his voice sounding far away. "But they sure help, don't they?"

"Weed is better than Oxy." Bankotsu blurted out and then shrugged. "If you're open to alternatives. Coffee is better than cocaine, too."

Inuyasha let out a dry laugh. "Funny."

"But I'm serious."

"I have a question."

"What?"

"What made you agree to sell to me?"

Bankotsu sucked in a breath and then shrugged. "I'd rather you get it from me than from someone else. If anyone is going to be responsible for something happening…I want it to be me."

Inuyasha dragged his fingers over his eyes, then shook his head.

"Just go to sleep," Bankotsu muttered. "You'll feel better in the morning." He added, taking steps toward the kitchen. Inuyasha shook his head. "C'mon."

"Why would you want to be held responsible if something happens to me?"

That was a tough question for Bankotsu to answer. He couldn't just straight up say that he would consider it punishment for what he'd done, what he'd created, the life he was bartering for his career. "I'm your friend," was his answer, "I care about you."

There was a snort. "Yeah, okay."

"You have a hard time believing I care?"

Inuyasha sniffled, ignoring Bankotsu as he tried to lure him toward his bedroom. "No, I have a hard time believing anyone cares for me."

"What about Kagome?"

"Especially, Kagome."

Bankotsu recoiled as if shocked. "Okay."

The elevator door opened, and it took less than a second for Miroku to appear around the bend, a grim look on his face. "Inuyasha."

"The fuck do you want?" Inuyasha hissed. "You gonna yell at me like your girlfriend did?"

Miroku's face fell. "...What?"