Chapter 1

BELLA'S POV

Outside it was raining hard. The drops of rain smashed into the window, creating a little song that played over and over. The wind howled loudly, as if it was trying to say something, but in frustration, ended up howling instead.

The world could have been crashing down outside, but I didn't care.

I was curled in a ball, facing the wall. Inside, the heat was turned up, and so I had kicked off the blankets. Edward was curled next to me, using one, cold finger to trace designs all over my back and shoulders.

His touch made me shiver. I could almost feel him smile when I did. Sometimes I thought he was waiting for a round of applause or something.

Slowly, I turned to face him.

"Why am I allowing you to stay awake again?" Edward asked, moving a strand of hair from in front of my face.

"You don't allow me to do anything. I'm allowing myself to stay awake," I moved closer, "don't you want to stay awake with me?"

"More than anything. But you need sleep Bella." Edward held me tightly to him.

I loved when he said my name. It just came out so perfectly, like he was meant to say it.

"One more hour."

"Try a half an hour."

I pouted. Edward was always concerned that I wasn't sleeping enough, or eating enough, or even breathing enough. It was nice to have someone care that deeply, but on the other hand, it could get really old.

He moved his lips to my ear, his breath tickling my skin. "Don't be mad Bella. We have this whole weekend to spend together."

I smiled. Charlie had been called away for a police convention somewhere in New Mexico, and wouldn't be back until late Monday night. Even when Charlie walked in, I knew Edward would still stay.

EDWARD'S POV

Slowly I lifted her chin, and kissed from her chin, all the way up to her ear. Her eyes closed as I did that, and I could feel the passion radiating between us.

Her skin felt so warm against me. It was just one of the many reasons I didn't want to change Bella. I would miss her warmth. I always looked forward for slipping my arms around her, and feeling the heat underneath the blankets.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked. It was a question I asked frequently. It was too hard to not know how Bella reacted to what I said, or what I did, or what she thought about as we lay in the silence of her bedroom.

She sighed. "It's too hard to think around you."

I smiled widely.

She opened her eyes, as if she knew I was smiling, and rolled her eyes. "Shall I give you more praise?"

I kissed her forehead. "Oh Bella, if you only knew what you do to me."

"I wish I did."

With that, I had her on her back.

"Edward what-"

I covered her mouth with my fingers. "Shh. You asked, and I'm answering."

She smiled, and closed her eyes. I loved when she did. It was as if she just wanted to experience my touch, rather than just my looks.

I got on top of her, straddling where her thighs were. I was careful to not grip her too tightly. Bella was so frail; it could take even the smallest amount of force to break her.

With one finger, I traced down the middle of her throat. Her skin tensed, but in a good way. Then, I laid each hand on either side of her neck. I could feel her pulse against my skin, a feeling I cherished.

I bent down, and pressed my lips lightly along her collar bone. She had done the courtesy of wearing a tank top to bed, and so it was easier to reach different areas of her body.

Before moving on, I suppressed a laugh.

"Bella, breathe before you faint."

Her cheeks turned red instantly, and she drew a shaky breath. Sometimes, I worried that I would be touching her, and I would forget to make sure she was breathing, and she would get dizzy and pass out. It had happened before.

When I heard her breathing steadily again, I gently massaged her shoulders. She smiled at this, and rolled her shoulders to show that she was definitely pleased.

Bella was so easy to please. I could hold her for a whole day, and she would be happy. As long as we were together, we would both be happy forever.

As I went to push the strap on Bella's top up, her heart started to beat a little faster.

Bingo.

Slowly, I laid my head between her breasts, and listened to her heart beating. When it had slowed, I lifted my head to see Bella's eyes opening. They looked beautiful in the darkness.

Bringing my mouth up to her face, I whispered against her cheek, "That's what you do to me."

BELLA'S POV

Edward lay next to me, bringing me close. I felt so safe in his arms.

"Now will you sleep?" He asked, running the back of his hand up and down my cheek.

I held in a yawn. "No, not yet."

He sighed. "What do you want to do that can't wait until morning?"

I raised my head from his chest. "Well first."

I pressed my lips lightly to his. He seemed a little sad to see me go to lay my head back down. So he kissed me again. And again. And again.

Soon I had to break away.

"Did I hurt you?" Edward asked, concerned.

"No," I drew in a big breath, "I forgot to breathe again."

"Isn't your brain supposed to tell your lungs to do that?" Edward asked, allowing me to lie back down.

"Well it's supposed to."

"Now you sleep."

I closed my eyes, and listened to the same lullaby Edward hummed for me every night.

EDWARD'S POV

Everything was calm. I was holding Bella close to me, and she was laying her head on my chest. She hadn't moved the entire night. That was my first suspicion that something was going to happen.

At first when she whimpered, I didn't think anything of it. Bella always talked in her sleep. She had grown prone to repeating the same things over and over again. Her favorite phrases being 'I love you Edward' and 'Mrs. Bella Cullen'.

Then she whimpered again. "Edward help me." She said.

I looked down. She then sat up; it was so sudden that it even surprised me.

"Edward don't let him do this!" She screamed.

I was at her side in a flash. "Bella, I'm here! Wake up!"

Bella opened her eyes, a few tears already escaping. "Don't let him take me Edward; he's going to hurt me."

I held her. "Bella, it was a dream."

She cried a little harder. "No, it was real! This man kidnapped me and took me to a dark place, and I felt pain…but I didn't know what it was."

It tore me up to see her cry. It was easier to help when she had sprained an ankle or bumped her head, because I could actually do something. But with nightmares, I could only try and calm her.

Slowly, I pulled her down with me. She stopped crying, but whimpered a little.

I hummed her lullaby softly against her hair, and soon she was asleep again.

EDWARD'S POV

When Bella was awake, I decided to forget her nightmares so I didn't upset her.

"Good morning love." I kissed her hair.

"What time is it?" She asked, smiling against my shirt.

"Around ten."

She raised her head. "I need a human minute before we get too carried away."

I laughed as she dashed off, grabbing a bundle of clothes and her bag of toiletries.

While I waited, I went to her dresser. Alice had re-stocked her drawers with clothes she had purchased shopping in Seattle. Bella didn't like us spending so much money on her, but we loved it.

I fingered a red blouse in her shirt drawer. Bella had worn it when we went to the meadow a few weeks back. She had looked breathtaking in it. I didn't understand why Bella didn't see the beauty she had.

When I opened the next drawer, I turned to make sure I was alone.

Carefully, I took a pair of silk, black panties from the mess of lingerie. Bella hated whenever Alice took her shopping in underwear stores. I, for one, didn't see the big deal.

I felt a finger poking the middle of my back.

"Freeze, and drop the panties."

I smiled. I could just imagine Bella's rosy cheeks as she blushed.

Slowly, I turned, and dropped her panties on the floor. Her face was on fire, just as I had suspected, and she looked embarrassed.

"Your underwear is nothing to be embarrassed about."

"Easy for you to say." Bella mumbled.

She was dressed in a shirt I had given her. It was just an old, white T-shirt with some dumb slogan on it. The sleeves had been cut off at some point. It looked great on her.

I bent and kissed her neck. It was my favorite part of her body.

I felt her knees give in before they really did, and caught her before she could fall on the floor.

"You know how I get when you do that." She said as I lifted her into my arms.

I laughed quietly. "What will I do with you?"

Bella's eyes averted and I sighed, knowing she was thinking something that she didn't want me to know about.

"Bella…" I started, carrying her to the bed. I set her down and sat next to her.

"Edward I don't want to fight."

I stood and went to the window, knowing immediately what she had been thinking.

"I won't change you Isabella Swan."

"Why not! It's my choice too you know!" Bella was right behind me. She put her hands on my shoulders.

"I don't care. I won't take your life from you."

She placed her chin on my shoulder, near my neck. I could feel her breath against my skin. "Then I'll just ask Alice to do it."

Before I could control my anger, I had turned, and grabbed Bella by her wrists. "No you will not!"

Her face twisted into a pained expression, and she fell to her knees. "You're hurting me Edward!"

I held on for a few more seconds before I realized what I had done. I let go, and turned to leap out the window.

"No Edward, don't leave. It's okay!" Bella had scrambled to her feet.

But I needed to leave. I didn't want to hurt Bella. Damn it, how could I have been so careless!

All I heard as I began running were Bella's frantic shouts for me to come back. I wanted to, but I knew I couldn't.

I ran to the meadow, making a record time. In a rage, I knocked over the biggest tree I could find, and began carving at it, kicking it, smashing it. I needed to kill something.

I collapsed to the ground, and fell on my back to look up at the sky.

I remembered bringing Bella here a few weeks back, the day she had worn her red blouse. While she lay in the middle of the meadow, her eyes closed, I had carefully climbed a tree near her, and watched as she sat up and looked for me.

"Edward?" She hissed. She stood, and brushed the dirt and grass from her jeans. She took a step.

"Edward! Edward Cullen!" She ran past me, heading deeper into the trees. I followed close behind.

It was inevitable that she would trip, and when she did, I was there to grab her.

"Were you following me that whole time?" She asked grumpily as I set her down.

"Of course I was. It's fun to watch you when you don't know I'm around."

"I knew you were around," she said as-a-matter-of-factually, "I just didn't know where."

I laughed and sat next to her. She tried to scoot away, but I pulled her back.

"Don't try to dazzle me Edward Cullen." She looked away.

I turned her face to me, and held my hand to her cheek. She blushed a little as she looked into my eyes, and realized I was doing the same.

"Don't be angry." I said, knowing she would forgive me. Bella had a temper like I did, but she was quick to return to her old self.

"I wasn't angry." Bella said, her eyes softening. "I just get embarrassed when you watch me like that."

I pulled my face down to hers, and murmured against her cheek, "You should never be embarrassed around me."

I felt her breathe my scent in. It always seemed to calm her.

Now, as I sat there alone, I wondered how I could have gotten so rough with her earlier. I needed to talk to someone.

BELLA'S POV

It must have been an hour that I had sat in front of the window, crying. Edward had rushed out, and I didn't know if he would come back.

Why should he? I wondered. He had better things to do then be with me. What was I compared to a god like Edward? I was just an annoying, clumsy basket case human. Edward really didn't need me.

It was too hard to think about him. I stood, still crying, and went downstairs to the kitchen. In my sadness, I had forgotten that I hadn't eaten in awhile.

But as I reached for the cereal, I realized that I wouldn't be able to eat. Not until I knew Edward was alright. I needed to find him.

I darted out the door, and headed for my truck. I knew where to look.