Here's another chapter for you guys, hope you enjoy!
Chapter Twenty
Matt stared up at the dark ceiling, his hand lightly running through Gabby's hair as the woman lay asleep in his arms. Glancing towards the clock again, he saw it was now only minutes until Gabby's alarm would go off. He hadn't gotten much sleep during the night, having been up for over an hour now. He'd done nothing but lay there in that time, not wanting to risk waking Gabby, their bodies having been entangled since the night before. Matt wasn't sure the reason for him not being able to get any sleep, all he knew was that he wouldn't be getting any more rest right now.
He felt Gabby subconsciously nuzzle deeper into him, her bare chest rubbing against his side as she shifted, her arm tightening around his waist. Matt knew she was slowly waking up, her internal clock telling her she'd need to be up soon. But that didn't stop her from groaning as her alarm went off, the sound blaring through the otherwise silent room. Gabby dug her face into his chest, seemingly trying to hide from the sound, Matt chuckling softly at her antics. It only took a few more seconds of the annoying sound filling their ears before Gabby gave in, rolling onto her back and reaching to turn off the alarm. She immediately rolled back into his side, tucking herself deep under the covers as Matt slid his hand down under the blanket, resting his warm palm against her skin.
The two sat in a peaceful quiet for a few moments, Matt taking to running his fingers lightly over her side, feeling Gabby's breath hitting his chest every few seconds. Her thumb began moving over his stomach, both of them wanting to enjoy the few minutes they had left before she needed to get up.
"You ready for today?" Matt whispered, not wanting to disrupt the peaceful calm they'd settled in.
Clearing the sleep from her voice, she spoke up after placing a light kiss to his chest. "I am." He hummed in response, his body tensing slightly as Gabby's hand subconsciously slipped lower down his stomach. Feeling his reaction to her, Gabby chuckled lightly, patting her hand against his skin before moving back up until she found his cheek. "No time for that, mister." She murmured, Matt grinning before using the arm around her to pull her on top of him, her legs straddling him as a gasp of surprise left her lips. His hands fell to her hips, gripping her tightly as he held her against him.
She opened her mouth to speak, Matt not giving her the chance as he lifted up to catch her lips with his, kissing her passionately, Gabby moaning into his mouth as he felt her press her body into his. A satisfied smirk played on his lips as they pulled away, air becoming a necessity for them both, the pair panting as they caught their breath.
"Are you sure about that?" He breathed out, managing to regulate his breathing enough to get the words out. The smug smirk stayed on his face, Gabby giving him a challenging look before slamming her lips back into his, the pair fighting for dominance as she ran a hand down his body. She felt him reacting to her touch, a smirk of its own resting on her face before Matt kissed it away, him raising his hips slightly as her hand moved further down.
"Gabby…" He pleaded softly against her mouth, Gabby stopping her movements just before getting where he wanted her.
"I need to get ready for work." She spoke lightly, bringing her hand back up his body and tapping his cheek gently. A look of shock spread over his face as she climbed off him, a chuckle escaping through her lips as she got off the bed, heading towards bathroom.
"Are you serious? Gabby-" He spoke frustratedly, Gabby laughing more as she walked through the door. "Tease." He muttered, blowing out a harsh breath as he heard the shower start running. Taking matters into his own hands, he threw the covers off of him, pushing himself from the bed and walking towards the room she just went to. When he entered, he saw her standing in front of the shower with her back to him, waiting for the temperature to warm up. Taking long strides, he got to her in seconds, wrapping his arms around her waist. She jumped slightly from the unexpected contact as he slid his head on her shoulder, tucking himself against her neck as he placed a light kiss to her skin.
"Matt, I wasn't kidding. I need to get ready for work." She spoke softly, bringing her hand up to rest on the side of his head, rubbing her fingers over his short hair.
"That was mean." He whispered against her skin, biting her neck gently before kissing the spot, hearing her release a soft moan. She could feel the effect she'd had on him as he pressed against her, Gabby's eyes falling closed as he continued placing soft kisses over her skin.
"I'm sorry, but I really need to get ready."
"You have two hours, that's plenty of time." He reasoned, moving his hand over her stomach. Gabby released a soft sigh, moving her head back to give him more access. He stopped his movements when she still hadn't said anything, resting his chin on her shoulder. "You take your shower." He gave in, but she shook her head.
"You're not going anywhere." She spoke defiantly, a grin falling to his face. "But you better make it quick."
"Challenge accepted." He murmured against her, placing one last kiss against her skin before she pulled away, stepping into the shower, Matt following her without prompting.
Matt watched her from the freshly made bed as she walked around the room, Gabby having just finished pulling her hair back before she went to get her new shirt from the closet. Their fun in the shower lasted just long enough before she kicked him out, giving him enough time to actually shower before making him leave. In the time she was she still in there, he dressed himself in a pair of blue jeans and a dark red t-shirt, he made the bed and cleaned up their clothes from last night, and started a fresh pot of coffee. Once those tasks had been completed, he'd taken to sitting on the bed and watching her get ready for work, able to feel the nerves radiating from her body as she moved around.
His eyes found her again as she came from the closet, tucking in the white paramedic shirt into her black pants, the uniform a shift from what he was used to seeing her in. She threw down a thick black jacket onto the bench at the end of the bed, Matt seeing the red SAS symbol emblazoned on the front. Gabby went to the dresser, pulling out a beanie and gloves, knowing a cold December day would be awaiting her.
After placing her things with her jacket, she came and sat down on the bed beside Matt, beginning to put on her shoes, her body leaning into his slightly as the bed dipped. He brought his hand around to rest on her back as she was leaned over, Gabby feeling the warmth of his skin through her shirt.
"You excited for this?" He asked softly, seeing her peek up at him before turning her attention back to her task.
"Yeah, I am. Feeling the first day jitters a little bit, but I feel good." She spoke honestly, leaning back up and finding his smiling face waiting for her. "I just gotta get back into the routine of being a paramedic again."
"You're gonna do amazing." He spoke instantly, wanting to soothe her worries. "The city of Chicago is lucky to have you back out there." She gave him a grateful smile, leaning forward to give him a quick kiss.
"Thank you." She put her hand on his knee, squeezing lightly before pushing herself up and walking to the end of the bed, grabbing her jacket.
"So what are you doing today?" She asked him, knowing he had a free day all to himself.
"Gonna go do some stuff with Kelly." He spoke, averting his eyes from her gaze. She looked at him quizzically, the shift in his demeanor obvious as she slid on her jacket.
"Oh yeah?" She asked him, Matt looking back up at her, seeing the look on her face. He simply shrugged, watching her put her gloves and beanie in her pockets.
"He needs help putting together some new furniture in his apartment." Matt covered, Gabby raising her eyebrows.
"Uh huh." She replied, coming back to stand in front of him. He parted his legs, giving her the space to stand in between them, Gabby putting her hands on his shoulders, an unconvinced look resting across her face.
"We are." He spoke with a small smile, Gabby rolling her eyes.
"Okay, sure." She gave in, leaning to place a kiss on the top of his head. She moved away from him just as quickly as she got there, walking to get her phone and wallet. "But whatever you and Kelly are doing, don't do anything stupid. Or get hurt." She told him, Matt smiling as she headed for the door, him standing up to follow her.
"Yes ma'am." He replied, following her into the kitchen, pouring her a cup of coffee as she got her things together. "You get off at seven, right?" He asked, effectively changing the subject, glad that Gabby didn't even question it.
"Yeah. I should be home around 7:30." She responded, throwing her things into her bag before slinging it over her shoulder.
"I hope you have a great first day. I know you will." He told her as he came to stand by her side, handing her the thermos. He gave her a quick peck, Gabby taking the drink from him and heading for the door. "You're gonna be amazing." Matt reminded her, Gabby smiling as she grabbed her car keys. "And I can't wait to hear all about it tonight."
"I'll tell you everything. I hope you have a good day, doing whatever it is you're doing with Kelly." She responded with a raised eyebrow, Matt looking at her sheepishly as he followed her to the door.
"Be safe out there. I love you." He told her, kissing the look off her face before opening the door for her.
"I love you too." She responded quickly, Matt giving her a wave as she walked down the sidewalk. He held the door open despite the freezing air forcing its way into the apartment, waiting until she was out of his sight before going back inside.
Gabby pulled into the first open parking spot she found, looking at the small station that housed the ambulances she'd be working out of, the station that would become her new home. During her twenty minute drive, snow had begun falling on the roads, Gabby thankful it hadn't gotten too bad yet. Grabbing her belongings, she killed the engine and exited her car, making sure to lock it before heading into the station. This was the first time she was seeing this place, and from first glance, it seemed pretty standard. There were three ambulances, all lined up at the different garage entrances. As she stepped in the entry closest to her, she saw the garage was nothing more than the spots for the ambos, and there was one set of doors that she assumed led inside.
Gripping her bag tightly, she walked towards the entrance, cautiously stepping inside the building. The layout was surprisingly similar to 51, just smaller. The common area was directly inside the entrance, as well as the radios being lined on the wall. Gabby could see the offices from where she was standing, and down the opposite hallway was what Gabby could only assume to be the way to the bunk room and locker rooms.
She saw six other paramedics, all sitting in the common room. One of them was in the kitchen, Gabby assuming they were making breakfast. She wasn't sure whether to make her presence known with them first, or go straight to the Chief Paramedic she'd been instructed to look out for. Before she could make the choice, one of the paramedics had spotted her, the woman smiling and getting up from the table.
"Dawson, right?" She spoke, grabbing the attention of the other paramedics as they all looked her way, Gabby being met by warm smiles all around.
"Yeah, that's me. Gabby Dawson." Gabby introduced, the woman coming over and shaking her hand.
"I'm Jemma Norris. I know you're working as a shadow for a few shifts, but I think I'm your partner." She said with a smile. Gabby reciprocated the action, taking in the brunette woman standing in front of her. She looked young, Gabby guessing she hadn't been on the job very long, but she seemed nice enough.
"It's nice to meet you."
"You too." She said enthusiastically, flashing a bright smile before grabbing Gabby's arm and bringing her into the common room. "Everyone, this is Gabby. Gabby, this is Michael Blevins, Nick Turner, Elizabeth Murray, Lucy Decker, and that is Bobby Miller." Jemma spoke, pointing to everyone as she introduced them. "Bobby usually isn't on our shifts, but he's gonna be with us until you've finished your light duty." She said, Bobby nodding. He was an older man, maybe a few years older than Matt. But everyone else in the room seemed younger, Gabby guessing only one of them to be older than her, the rest of them seeming to be as young as Jemma.
"It's nice to meet you all, I'm excited to be here." Gabby spoke, them responding with similar words, Dawson not having a chance to get another word in before Norris grabbed her arm, saying some words about Gabby needing to meet the Chief and then leading her towards the office. They stopped by the door, Jemma knocking and waiting for the signal to enter before pulling Gabby into the room.
"Chief Walters? Dawson is here." She said, the enthusiasm in her voice lowering considerably, Gabby assuming she did that for a sense of professionalism.
"Thank you Norris." The brunette excused herself, Walters gesturing towards the chair across from his desk. "Nice to meet you, Dawson."
"Likewise."
"I've heard a lot of great things from Chief Peters, and I reached out to Chief Boden over at Firehouse 51, he had nothing but wonderful things to say about you as well." Gabby gave him a small smile, the older man reciprocating the action. "I know you have to be treated with kid gloves for a few shifts, but if your past work is any indication, you should have no trouble here." He offered warmly.
"Thank you, Chief."
"You've clearly met Jemma Norris, your partner. Did you meet everyone else?"
"Yes sir. Jemma introduced everyone."
"Very well. I know Norris can help you get settled in. From a logistics standpoint, everything here runs pretty much the same as a firehouse, so I don't think you should have much trouble getting adjusted. But if you need anything, just come and ask."
"Thank you, Chief."
The two exchanged more pleasantries before Gabby was dismissed, grabbing her things and heading back out into the station. Walking towards the common room, she saw everyone where she left them, Jemma seeing her immediately.
"Can you show me around, Norris?" Gabby asked, Jemma nodding happily as she stood up, coming to stand by her side as they began walking down the hallway.
"So I know you came from a firehouse, what was that like?" She asked curiously as they walked in step.
"It was fun. It was crazy, but it was good." Gabby replied, Jemma nodding.
"How long have you been a paramedic?"
"I was at 51 for about nine years."
"Wow, that's a long time." Jemma breathed out in admiration. "I hope I can do the job that long."
"How long have you been here?" Gabby asked her as they turned a corner, seeing a room with a few bunks.
"A little under a year." Jemma told her, before shifting her attention to the room they were in. "This is the bunk room, usually no ones in here unless we're working overnight shifts. And this way leads to the locker room and bathrooms, and the laundry room." She explained, leading the way. Gabby found the layout very similar to 51, just at a smaller scale. "This locker can be yours, if you want." Jemma spoke, Gabby seeing her pointing to the empty one next to hers. This girl was clearly making an effort with her, and Gabby felt very appreciative of that. Although 51 was a family, Gabby knows all too well that not all places operate like that. So to work in a place that seemed to have that special bond, and had nice people, she was thankful.
"Yeah, that sounds great." Gabby replied, seeing a smile light up on the girl's face. Jemma stepped out of the way, giving Dawson space to get into her new locker.
"So what made you change from the CFD to a private company?" Jemma asked as Gabby began putting some things away. She put away the extra uniform first, glancing back towards the girl before answering.
"Uh, well I took a break from being a paramedic for a little bit. I went to work in Puerto Rico to help with relief efforts. And when I got back, I was just looking for a change of pace." She explained vaguely, Jemma accepting her answer without question.
"That's amazing. How was the work there?"
"Hard. But rewarding." She answered with a small smile, trying to steady the nerves she felt rising within her at the thought of Puerto Rico.
"Who's that?" Jemma asked suddenly, her curiosity getting the better of her as she inadvertently changed the subject, seeing the pictures Gabby was putting up.
Blowing out a breath, Gabby's eyes ran over the photos hanging on the door. "Which one?" She asked with a slight chuckle, looking between the people in the pictures.
"Well, any of them. But I was referring to the same guy who's in all three of the pictures." Jemma said with a smirk, Gabby feeling heat rise to her cheeks as she glanced towards the pictures.
"That's Matt, he's a Captain over at Firehouse 51, where I used to work." Gabby spoke, seeing Jemma raise her eyebrows, clearly wanting more information. "He's, uh, my husband." The word slipped out before she could even think of how else to address him. She knew it wasn't true, not anymore, and she was only causing problems for herself if anyone ever found out otherwise, but she couldn't bring herself to refer to him as her boyfriend. He was so much more than that, no matter their status anymore. Referring to him as just her boyfriend seemed cheap, even when they'd just been dating she always saw him as more than that. And especially now, she still thought of him as her husband, and she hoped one day they'd be back to that.
"Aww, that's sweet." Jemma replied genuinely. "And he's cute." She spoke with a giggle, Gabby smiling as she traced over his face in the photo.
"Yeah, he is." She murmured, before returning to putting the rest of her things away.
"How long have you two been together?"
"Six years, give or take." Gabby answered, closing her locker and turning her attention back to her partner.
"Wow… You seem like you have an amazing life, Gabby." Jemma spoke, Gabby sitting down next to her on the bench.
"Well, it's been interesting. That's for sure." She responded, finding herself becoming uncomfortable with all the attention on her. Wanting to shift the focus, she started questioning the girl in front of her, wanting to know more about her.
"And what about you? Anyone special?" Gabby asked with a grin, the blush rising to the girl's cheeks giving her all the answer she needed.
"My boyfriend, Marcus." She spoke sheepishly, embarrassment filling her voice.
"How long have you guys been together?"
"Seven months." Gabby saw how happy Jemma got at the simple mention of Marcus, and it couldn't help but remind her of herself and Matt.
"You love him." Gabby commented, Jemma blushing furiously before nodding, her head facing the ground. Gabby opened her mouth to say more, but was cut off by a voice over the intercom, signaling ambulance 98 to a patient across town. Gabby was all ready to jump up and go, but then remembered she didn't even know what ambo she was on.
"Is that-?" She questioned, Jemma shaking her head.
"No, it's not. We're ambulance 12." Accepting the answer, Gabby settled into her seat on the bench, turning her body to face Norris.
"So, tell me all about Marcus." Gabby prompted, the young girl smiling widely before turning herself as well, it taking only seconds before she was gushing over her boyfriend.
Matt stood anxiously out on the sidewalk, glancing over the busy street around him, waiting to see the familiar face that was supposed to be here over half an hour ago. He bounced back and forth on his feet, trying to keep as much warmth in his body as possible while snow fell around him. Standing under the awning of the building only provided so much protection from the harsh winter around him, Matt rubbing his glove covered hands together as he waited impatiently.
"There you are." Matt called, his voice not hiding the annoyance he felt as Kelly jogged across the street, careful not to slip on any ice or snow around him.
"Calm down, you changed the address on me last minute." He bit back, Kelly slowing down his pace as he got to Matt. "I thought we were gonna be at your place. Why were you waiting outside anyway?" He questioned, adjusting the beanie on his head as he stood under the minimal shelter.
"Because you don't know why we're here."
"And whose fault is that." Severide responded, glancing up around at all the different shops around them. "So what are we here for?"
Staying silent with a grin on his face, Matt nodded his head to the sign on the window behind him. Kelly glanced to it, his eyebrows furrowing as realization set in.
"What are we doing at a jewelry store? This a Christmas present for Dawson, or something?" He questioned, his eyes shooting back to Casey. But the look in his friend's eye told him there was more to it.
"Kind of, kind of not." Matt responded vaguely, Kelly narrowing his gaze.
"What does that mean?"
"We're here to find a new wedding ring." Matt spoke nonchalantly, his grin widening as he saw the look of surprise on Kelly's face. Before Severide got a chance to speak, Matt turned around and headed for the door.
"Wait- what?" Kelly questioned in disbelief, rushing after his friend and following him into the building. Matt and Kelly were barely in the door before one of their staff came up to them.
"Hello, what can I help you with today?" The woman asked politely, Kelly holding his hand up before Matt got a chance to respond.
"Give us a minute." Severide spoke, grabbing Matt's shoulder and pulling him to the corner of the store. "Okay talk me through this."
"What?"
"Explain to me why you're doing this. You know I support you, and Dawson, but just- I wanna know where your head's at." Kelly responded, Matt nodding as he crossed his arms over his chest.
"I love her, Sev. I never stopped loving her, I never will stop loving her." He started, Kelly seeing a small smile form on Matt's face. "With everything we've gone through and everything we've overcome, I don't want to spend another minute with her not being my wife again. Those months without her were torture, and I've been given a second chance with her. To do things right, and part of that is us being married again." Matt explained, Kelly nodding slowly as he digested Casey's words. "So with Christmas in a few weeks, I want to propose to her again then."
"Okay…" Kelly drug the word out as it left his mouth, clearly not completely convinced of what Matt wanted to do.
"If you're gonna try and talk me out of this, don't bother. My mind's made up." Casey spoke defensively, Kelly shaking his head immediately.
"I'm not. You know Gabby better than anyone, if you think this is the right thing for you two, of course I'll support you." Severide started, a grateful smile falling on Matt's face. "Does Dawson know?" Matt merely shook his head in response, Kelly releasing a soft sigh. "But you're sure she wants this, too?"
Matt took a second to gather his thoughts, taking a slow, deep breath before responding. "For the first time in awhile, maybe since we got married, I know that Gabby and I are completely on the same page." He spoke softly. "I know what we both want, and that's to be together for the rest of our lives. The only thing I want is for her to be my wife again." Matt admitted, Kelly's eyes softening. "I don't want to prolong what her and I both already know. There's no reason for us not to get married. When I look at her, I see her as my wife. She'll always be my wife. The paperwork, the ceremony, those are only formalities. She's my wife, she never should've stopped being my wife." Matt paused for a moment, Kelly watching him intently. "I don't want to spend another second not married to her."
"And you're sure it's not too soon?" Kelly asked apprehensively, not knowing what Matt's reaction would be. The slight glare he was met with proved his point, but Kelly simply shook his head. "Just hear me out. Gabby's only been back, what, five weeks? And with the divorce and everything, why rush into this? Would it really be so bad to wait a little while? Gabby's not going anywhere."
"We got divorced because we had to." Matt defended. "Neither of us wanted it, it never would've been on the table if not for the circumstances."
"I know." Kelly responded.
"And I know Gabby's not going anywhere. But we don't know I'm not." Matt spoke lowly, Kelly's eyes falling closed as he took a breath.
"Is that why you're doing this? Rushing into this because of the job?"
"I'm not rushing into anything. But we both know with our jobs, there's no guarantee we'll always make it back home. And why should I waste time not being married to her, when I know I want to spend the rest of my life with her as my wife." Matt spoke forcefully, taking a breath to calm himself. "Look, I'm not doing this because there's a chance I could die, I'm doing this because I know how much I love Gabby. I know that she's the love of my life and I want to be married to her again. There's no reason to wait, I feel as sure about this as I did when I proposed the first time, and as sure as I felt when I married her."
"What about when you proposed the second time?" Kelly asked with a smirk, trying to lighten the mood, happy when his question elicited a chuckle from Matt.
"Yeah, as sure as I felt then, too." Casey responded, shifting his weight on his feet. "But really, Severide, I know this is the right time to do this. Waiting a few more months won't change anything, except wasting time that I could spend married to her."
"Alright." Kelly agreed, patting Matt on the shoulder. "If you're sure about all this, let's do it. But I do have one more question." Severide prefaced, Matt raising his eyebrows as he waited. "Have you guys talked about it? The divorce?"
Blowing out a sigh, Matt shook his head. "No, not really. It's been mentioned in passing. We need to have a conversation about it, and we will. But things have just been going so well lately, I didn't want to bring up more bad memories." Matt explained, Kelly nodding in understanding. "But we're gonna talk about it, we have to."
"Well luckily for me, I don't have to be apart of that conversation." Kelly spoke lightly, Matt rolling his eyes. "Now let's find you a ring." He spoke with a grin, Matt nodding appreciatively.
"Thank you." Matt started to walk back towards the salesmen, but Kelly grabbed his arm to stop him. "What, Severide? I thought you said only one more question."
"Sorry, it's just- why are you getting a new ring when she already has one?" Kelly asked curiously, Matt releasing a soft sigh, his demeanor faltering slightly. "What is it?" Concern filled Kelly's voice, Matt running his hand over his jaw before answering.
"Both her rings were taken… during the attack." Matt spoke softly, knowing he could speak more freely with Severide than he could with anyone else. Kelly frowned, sadness filling him as the words hit his ears.
"Shit, man." He breathed out, shaking his head. "I didn't even think of that, I'm sorry-" He started, but Matt waved him off, the blonde taking a deep breath.
"It's fine, really. But they took both her rings. So I need to get her a new one." Casey explained. "And honestly, since we got married nothing has gone right for us. A new ring couldn't hurt. Sort of a fresh start, you know?"
Kelly nodded, the two men moving from the corner of the store towards the display cases, the woman coming to meet them.
"So what are you two looking for today?"
"A new wedding band." Matt spoke, eyeing the rings in the display case.
"How long have you two been together?" She asked with a smile, looking back and forth between the both of them. Kelly chuckled, Matt shaking his head with a grin.
"No, it's for my, uh, wife, Gabby." He spoke, Kelly smirking at his choice of words. "Her wedding ring was stolen, so I'm looking to get her a new one." Matt explained, ignoring Kelly's look.
"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. Do you know what you're looking for?"
"I think just a simple, silver band. She loved her old one, and with her job it's better to not have anything too big that could get caught on things." Matt explained, the woman nodding as she led them to a different case.
"What does she do?"
"She's a paramedic." He spoke proudly, the woman nodding with a smile. Matt leaned over the counter, looking at the different rings, it taking only seconds before one caught his eye.
"That one, can I see it?" Matt asked, the woman pulling it out and placing it on the glass. Picking it up, he examined it closely. It was similar to her old one, the band itself a bit thinner, but it looked like Gabby. The second he saw it, it reminded him of her.
"This is the one." He spoke adamantly, Kelly glancing to him.
"You sure?"
"Yep. This is the one for Gabby."
The entire process took under an hour, Matt feeling happier as he walked from the jewelry store with a small bag clasped in his hand, Kelly following behind him.
"Thanks for bringing me, man." Severide spoke as they maneuvered through the people on the sidewalk.
"Well, the first time I did this I brought Shay, but you're an okay second choice." Matt joked, Kelly scoffing as he gave a reluctant nod.
"Fair enough." He responded, the two men saying a quick goodbye before parting ways. Matt hurried to his truck as the snow fell down, a permanent smile resting on his face as he pictured giving Gabby this ring, warmth filling his otherwise cold body at the thought of being married to her again.
Matt skillfully moved around the kitchen, opening the oven to check on the salmon and veggies he was cooking, making sure he was satisfied with its progress before moving to clean some of the dishes in the sink that had been there all day. Glancing towards the clock, he saw it a few minutes past 7:30. He knew Gabby should be home from work soon, and he couldn't wait to hear all about her day.
He'd already got the table set, having put out a new bottle of wine to have with their meal, a celebration of sorts for her completing her first day. As he placed the last dirty plate in the dishwasher, he heard the jingling of keys sliding into the back door. He closed the dishwasher just as she walked in, Matt turning around in time to see her close the door behind her, turning the lock before walking further in.
"Hey babe." He spoke, moving around the island as he caught her smile, walking towards her and placing a soft kiss to her lips.
"Hey yourself." She replied, Matt sliding her bag down off her shoulder, placing it softly on the ground before leaning back up, meeting her eye line.
"How was your first day?" He asked, placing his hands on the sides of her arms, Gabby giving him a warm smile
"It was good, different but good." She responded, the pair getting separated as the timer on the oven went off. Matt dropped his hands from her body, walking back into the kitchen.
"I can't wait to hear all about it." He told her, grabbing their meal from the oven.
"What's all this?" Gabby asked as she walked further into the apartment, seeing the table set and the meal Matt had prepared.
"Figured I could make you dinner, as a congratulations for your first day back." He spoke with a soft grin, carrying the pan over the table, beginning to put the food on their plates.
"Thank you." She replied softly, hanging up her jacket on the coat rack before walking towards their table. "Anything I need to do?" She asked, Matt turning to face her, being careful to avoid grazing her with the pan, not wanting to burn her.
"Just sit down and enjoy." He spoke lightly, placing a soft kiss to her forehead before discarding the pan on the island and coming back to the table, the two sitting down together.
"So tell me all about it." He spoke excitedly, pouring wine into their glasses as Gabby took a bite of her food.
"It was good, everyone there is really nice." She replied after swallowing, Matt smiling encouragingly at her. "There's three ambos on call during a shift, so it doesn't get very busy. At least my first shift wasn't. We only had three calls, all of which were transports. But it was good. I think it's the type of job I need for right now." She told him.
"It sounds nice. What about your partner?"
"Her name is Jemma Norris, she's really nice, she's… perky." Gabby spoke, Matt chuckling at her words. "But she's sweet. She's young, in her early twenties, but she's good at her job." Gabby explained before taking a sip of wine. "For a few shifts I'm also working with a guy name Bobby Miller. He's on the ambo with us until my probationary period is over. He's a nice guy, older, like you." Gabby spoke with a smirk, Matt cocking his head to the side.
"Good thing he's gone in a few days, knowing how much you like the older men." He teased her, Gabby scoffing, watching as a smirk appeared on his lips. "I might have something to worry about."
Gabby laughed before she responded to him, Matt grinning at the sound. "You have nothing to worry about. I only have eyes for one old man." She assured him, Matt rolling his eyes.
"Good to know." He spoke, taking a drink. "So you like your partner? You feel comfortable working with her?" He shifted the subject, Gabby nodding.
"I do. I feel comfortable there, I know she's got my back. And I really like all the other paramedics working there, they seem like good people."
"Good." He replied, the two smiling at each other before going back to their meal.
"Oh, uh, I should probably tell you…" Gabby started, catching his attention. "Norris, she thinks, well I told her-" Gabby rambled, cutting herself off to gather her thoughts. Matt watched her curiously, reaching across the table and grabbing her hand, Gabby relaxing at his touch. "I introduced you as my husband." She breathed out, Matt's eyes widening slightly, a feeling of surprise filling his body. "I probably shouldn't have, but she saw me put up photos of us in my locker and she asked who you were." A smile rested on his face as she spoke, Gabby not expecting that reaction from him. But it soothed her worries, making a smile of her own appear on her face. "I know we're not-" She cut herself off, clearing her throat before continuing. "But it felt wrong, to just call you my boyfriend. Or whatever we currently are." She spoke nervously, Matt squeezing her hand. "I just didn't want you to get blindsided by it, if you visited me at work, or we ran into each other on a call."
"It's okay, Gabby." He assured her, a sigh of relief escaping her lips.
"Really?"
"Of course. I mean, I know we've got a lot to figure out, but I'm kinda… glad you introduced me as your husband." He spoke, the smile never leaving his face. Gabby nodded, giving his hand one last squeeze before dropping it, the two going back to their food.
They fell into comfortable conversation as they ate, Gabby giving him all the details of her day, the two enjoying their time together. Both Gabby and Matt were on shift tomorrow, so they made sure to take advantage of the simple moments they had with each other, this dinner included.
Once dinner was over, Matt offered to clean up while Gabby went to go change into comfier clothes, knowing his surprise of dinner hadn't given her the time to change out of her work attire when she got home. He had just finished putting away the leftovers as Gabby emerged from the bedroom, clad in a pair of sweatpants and one of Matt's t-shirts, the material swallowing her as she took a few steps towards him.
"Have any plans for tonight, Captain?" Gabby asked lightly, Matt smiling as he walked to meet her.
"Can we talk?" He asked her. Furrowing her eyebrows, Gabby nodded, hearing the serious tone in his voice.
"Yeah, of course." She replied, reaching for his hand as the two headed for the living room. She sat down on the couch, Matt sitting next to her, her hand moving to rest on his thigh. "What's going on?"
"It's about what you said earlier, about you referring to me as your husband." She tensed slightly, wondering where this conversation was headed. "We've never really talked about it… the divorce." He said, his voice low. Gabby shifted in her seat, her eyes darting towards her lap as he looked at her. "We have to talk about it, Gabby. We can't ignore it."
"I know." She whispered, glancing back up to him. "I don't want to avoid it, it just- hurts." She gulped, Matt nodding in understanding, a frown forming on his face.
"I know it does." He responded, placing his hand on top of hers.
"I know I left us no choice." She admitted, her eyes flashing to their conjoined hands. "Me leaving, I know I chose divorce for us. And I'm so sorry, Matt." He shook his head, dropping her hand to bring his up to the side of her face, making her look at him.
"We both chose it, alright? It wasn't just your fault. Both of us could've done things differently, we both made mistakes here." He assured her, Gabby nodding slowly, a lone tear escaping down her cheek.
"I just want to know where your head's at." He started, rubbing his thumb over the side of her face. "I mean, I know things had gotten hard between us before you left, but-" Matt stopped himself, feeling a lump forming in his throat. "We've come so far Gabby, and I wholeheartedly believe if we thought we had another option, we would've never gotten divorced in the first place."
"Me too." She agreed, leaning into his palm. "I know it's more complicated than just one of us being to blame, but I need you to know how much I regret how I handled everything." She was practically whispering at this point, the emotion in her voice betraying her. "When we got together, never in a million years did I think us getting married would've ended in divorce. If I could go back and change everything, I would in a heartbeat." She promised, tears welling in her eyes as she spoke. Matt felt tears gathering in his as well, him nodding as her words hit his ears.
"I know baby." He spoke softly. "I regret how I handled things, too. I made things harder than they needed to be. You were hurting and I pushed you away instead of helping you through it." He paused, taking a steadying breath, clearing his throat as he searched from the right words to say. "We both made mistakes, both of us hurt each other. We can't take it back, but I know how much I love you. How much I've always loved you and will always love you." He spoke surely, Gabby nodding silently as his words filled the air around them.
The two sat in a heavy, yet comfortable silence for a few moments, both of them needing that time to collect themselves. It wasn't until Matt spoke up again that their quiet had been disturbed.
"Can I ask you something?" He prefaced gently, Gabby looking up at him and nodding, hearing the weight his words held. "There's something that's been bothering me, something you said to me awhile ago and I haven't been able to let it go." Matt started, Gabby bracing herself for whatever was coming. She could only imagine what she'd said that left such a lasting effect on him, knowing both of them had some said awful things to one another. "It was during our last conversation, or what had been our last conversation. When you signed the papers." He began, Gabby waiting for him to continue. That conversation had played over in her mind many times in the months after it happened, but she couldn't pinpoint which part of it he was talking about.
His eyes found hers, opening his mouth to speak. "What did you mean when you asked me for more time?" He questioned, Gabby sighing softly. "You said you needed more time to think about everything, and I know, at the time, I cut you off and didn't let you really explain yourself. But I just… want to know what you meant."
"Matt, we don't have to-"
"Please, Gabby." He pleaded, "I wanna know."
She stayed silent for a few seconds, trying to figure out how to give him the answers he was looking for.
"I was planning on, or thinking about, coming back home." She admitted quietly, Matt's eyes falling closed. He'd always expected that was what she meant, but hearing it come from her broke his heart. "Every day there was getting harder, and I missed you so much. I missed my life here so much. I was scared, to come back. I was. But it felt like I had nothing left to lose. I had pretty much lost you already at that point, and I knew signing those papers meant I'd lose you completely, so I decided to get over my fear and come home." Tears filled his eyes as she spoke, Gabby clearing her throat before continuing. "And then when I got the papers, and saw your signature, it became all the more real. I knew if I didn't come back then, there'd be nothing to come back to."
"Why didn't you tell me?" His voice was dry, his words cracking as they left his lips.
"Because when you called, and I heard you, it hit me." His face showed nothing but confusion, Matt staying quiet as he waited for her to finish her thought. "I was hurting you. And it was selfish of me to come and force my way back into your life. I heard how hurt you were, and it was then I realized I couldn't expect you to just let me back in. You asked me not to drag you along anymore. I had put you through enough, so I did what I thought you wanted, and signed the papers."
Matt blew out a shaky breath, a single tear falling down his face as he digested her words. The words that held so many implications, the words that could've changed everything for them.
"I- I don't…" He couldn't form a sentence, the weight of everything hitting him like a ton of bricks. If he had let her talk that night, if he hadn't spoken to her the way he had, she might've been back home with him a hell of a lot sooner. They might've never gotten divorced. She would've never gotten attacked.
He felt sick to his stomach as the last thought hit him, Matt drawing in a deep breath.
"Matt…" Gabby whispered, him snapping his head up to look at her. "Whatever you're thinking, stop." She could read him like a book, she knew he was blaming himself.
"Gabby, if I had just let you talk to me, everything would've been so much different."
"Maybe, yeah. But I still could've told you. I made the choice to stay, that's not on you."
"You would've never gotten hurt…" He murmured, Gabby shaking her head.
"Matt, what happened to me wasn't your fault." They'd made so much progress in Matt moving on from his guilt, she didn't want this to set them back. To set him back. "It was still my decision to stay. I thought I was doing what was best for the both of us, you're not at fault for that, okay?"
He nodded slowly, giving himself a moment to reel in his emotions as he took in Gabby's words.
"Okay." He responded, Gabby breathing out a sigh of relief.
"Okay?"
He nodded, reaching for her hand. "Yeah… I'm just sorry I didn't let you really talk to me that night." He murmured, rubbing his thumb over the back of her hand. "God, we've caused each other so much pain, Gabby. But as hard as the past half year has been on us, I do believe there is one good thing that can come from this. And that's us learning from our mistakes." Gabby nodded in agreement, bringing her hand up to wipe away her tears. "And I'd like to think we've done a pretty good job at it so far." He spoke with a small smile.
"I think we have, too." She responded, Matt leaning forward and placing a soft, lingering kiss against her lips.
"I know we're not legally married anymore, but I agree with what you said. You could never just be a girlfriend to me. I still see you as my wife, I always will. And one day, we're gonna get that back. I promise you." He spoke honestly, a wide smile gracing her lips.
"I want that for us, I want it so much." She spoke, emotion filling her voice as Matt leaned forward, kissing her passionately. Gabby pushed herself up and threw her leg over his waist, straddling him as their lips stayed connected. Matt deepened the kiss, grabbing her hips and holding her to him, her arms wrapping around his neck.
They separated when the need for air became too much, her lips ghosting over his as they drew in steady breaths. "I love you." She murmured, Matt dragging his hand up from her waist until he came to a stop on her neck, not letting her get very far as he felt her smile against him.
"I love you too, Gabby. So much." He closed the slight distance between them again, the two settling in on the couch, both of becoming lost in one another.
I'm pretty sure I rewrote every scene in this chapter at least once. For some reason, I was having a hard time with this one. But I like where it ended up. And writing these scenes between Matt and Gabby has become very therapeutic for me, not gonna lie.
I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. If you can, please leave a review and let me know what you thought! Things between Dawsey are gonna be getting interesting here soon, I'm very excited for these upcoming chapters.