Hello hello hello, everyone! Here's the next chapter for you all, I loved seeing your response to the last one. It was a little amusing to me, some of you were wanting Gabby to completely go off on Matt, while others were wanting the exact opposite. That's part of why this is so fun to share this story with you all, because of the different way you all see things and how you guys interpret the things I write. I don't know, that was just a random thought, but it was kind of entertaining seeing all that. But you guys will find out here in a second how Gabby reacts to what Matt has to tell her. Settle in. It's a bumpy one.
Also, thank you for the well wishes. Luckily, I've been feeling a little better, but your messages were so sweet, and greatly appreciated. Thank you for that.
I hope you all enjoy this one, happy reading!
Chapter Seventy Six
"There's something I never told you… about the day that guy tried to kill me."
Her eyebrows furrowed as the words left his lips, Gabby angling her body slightly towards her husband, seeing the regretful look in his eye, Dawson's mouth opening partially before she closed it, trying to understand what he was talking about.
"What… What do you mean? What didn't you tell me?" She finally found her voice, confusion laced in her words, Matt knowing that confusion would soon be mixed with anger.
Pinching the bridge of his nose tightly, Matt released a heavy sigh, forcing himself to look back towards his wife before responding. "You know how I told you he said things about you and Sofia? How he was gonna hurt you guys after he killed me?" He prefaced, Gabby nodding slowly. "...He didn't just say things about you two." Matt added with a gulp, seeing his wife's eyes narrow slightly, still trying to grasp what he was saying.
"What are you talking about, Matt?" She asked again, clearly getting frustrated by him dragging this out, Matt running his hand over his mouth, shaking his head before spitting the words out.
"When he tried to shoot me and the gun jammed, and the police were coming, he said something before he smacked with the gun and ran… He threatened me." Matt felt her body tense, the muscles in her leg tightening underneath his touch as he kept his eyes on her, a million different emotions playing out across her face, Matt unable to pinpoint exactly what she was feeling. But he knew he needed to finish telling her what happened. "...Before he ran, he told me that I was a dead man."
He saw the immediate shift in her, Gabby's lips parted slightly, her eyes shining with fear before she looked ahead, her head falling down towards her lap.
They sat in a thick, tense silence for a few minutes, aside from the occasional noises their daughter was making in the back seat, Matt knowing better than to try and say anything else to her right now. He messed up, he knew he did. Regardless of how hard things had been on him after that call, he never should've kept this from her, especially not for this long. And now all he could do was give her time to digest this, knowing it wasn't easy to hear that her husband might have a target on his back.
But he was getting more and more concerned the longer they sat there and she hadn't said a word, a deep frown etched across his face as he waited for any sign from her, anything that would tell him how she was doing.
"Go to the district."
Her words were barely audible, they almost sounded muffled as they left her lips, Matt sighing softly as he squeezed her leg, but she pushed his hand away.
"Gabby-"
"Go." She repeated, lifting her head up, Matt instantly seeing the anger, mixed with worry, burning in her eyes. "We need to talk to Antonio, right now. Go."
Knowing it was pointless to argue, Casey simply nodded, releasing a heavy breath as he put the car in drive, heading off in the direction of the 21st district.
Matt did what he could to focus on the road, driving safely through the slick streets of Chicago while Gabby's gaze stayed trained on her window, Casey able to feel the tension radiating off her body. He wanted to talk to her, to try and make sure she was okay, but he didn't even know what to say. He knew she was upset, but he didn't know if that stemmed more from finding out Matt's life had been threatened, or the fact that he lied about it. And, depending on which one it was, those were two very different conversations; although if he had to guess, she was probably equally upset about both.
Not having said a word the entire drive, Matt eventually pulled up to the curb outside the district, Gabby instantly reaching for her seatbelt to unfasten it before he could even get the car in the park. Once they were securely stopped, he reached out towards her, gently grabbing ahold of her arm to stop her before she got out, Gabby turning back to look at him, an unreadable expression covering her face.
Of all the different reactions he'd expected from her, complete silence hadn't been one of them. And just as it had while they were in the grocery store, it worried him, her not saying anything worse than any other reaction she could've had. Because his wife didn't get quiet often. Only when she was beyond angry, or when she was scared but didn't want to show it, those were really the only times she got like this, and he didn't like either of those options.
"I'm sorry…" He murmured, Gabby's face unchanging. "I should've told you sooner, I know that. But I just- I wasn't able to think straight, and I didn't want to worry you. But I should've told you before now, and I'm sorry."
Gabby blinked quickly, giving him a sharp nod before continuing to open the door, getting out of the car without a word. Sighing softly, Matt followed her lead, knowing there was no possible way for this to end without a fight, Casey grabbing the diaper bag while his wife got Sofia's car seat from the back, the little girl having fallen asleep during the ride. Gabby moved the shield down, not wanting baby Sofia to get hit with snow as they walked inside, Matt walking around towards the sidewalk.
"Do you want me to carry her?" He asked, reaching out for the car seat, but Gabby turned before he could grab it, beginning to walk past him.
"I got it." She responded shortly, Matt releasing another sigh before following after her, making sure to lock the vehicle before he got too far away. He jogged ahead of her when they got to the steps, Matt walking ahead of her to get the door, Gabby giving nothing more than a soft thanks as they stepped inside the warm lobby. Casey's eyes bounced around the room before moving towards Platt, the woman exactly where she always was, Gabby walking towards her first.
"Well, if it isn't the Casey family." She greeted, flashing them both a smile, the woman always having a soft spot for the both of them.
"Hey Trudy, is my brother upstairs?" Gabby asked, grimacing slightly as the weight of Sofia's car seat pulled on her sore wrist, Matt noticing the reaction instantly. Without prompting, he grabbed the car seat from her, earning a slight glare from his wife in the process, but he ignored it, holding the handle firmly in his grasp. He didn't care if she was upset with him, he wasn't going to let her continue to hold the car seat out of pure stubbornness when it was obviously causing her some discomfort, the pain still present in her wrist being a conversation for a different time.
Noticing the tension between the couple, Trudy nodded towards the stairs, moving her hand down towards the button that opened the gate. "He should be upstairs, you can go ahead and go up there." She told them, Gabby giving her a weak smile before she stepped away from the desk.
"Thank you, Trudy." She responded, Matt giving the Sergeant a similar look of gratitude before walking in step behind Gabby, the family climbing the stairs and heading up to Intelligence.
When they reached the landing, it didn't take long for Gabby to find her brother, the detective sitting at his desk, his eyes focused on his computer, most of his colleagues doing the same. Taking a step forward, Gabby cleared her throat, gaining the attention of the room, an immediate look of surprise covering Antonio's face.
"Gabs, Matt-... what are you guys doing here?" He asked, pushing himself up from his seat, Gabby feeling everyone's eyes on her. "We're still looking into the thing with your truck, Casey, but we haven't got anywhere."
"That's why we're here." Gabby replied quickly, Antonio's eyebrows furrowing when he saw the uneasiness in his sister's demeanor, the older Dawson glancing curiously between the couple. "Can we talk?"
"Yeah, sure." He responded without hesitation, glancing back towards the break room, finding it empty. "Follow me."
With a nod, Gabby walked behind her brother as they moved towards the break room, Matt carrying a sleeping Sofia in his grasp, flashing soft smiles to the members of Intelligence. But his face hardened when he caught Voight's gaze, the man in his office, clearly surprised to see the firefighter, Matt giving him a tight nod before walking into the break room, closing the door behind him.
"What's going on?" Antonio asked as he leaned his body into the counter, Matt placing Sofia's carseat down on the small couch under the window, glancing quickly under the shield, ensuring his daughter was still asleep before he turned to face the Dawsons, seeing both of them watching him expectantly.
"Tell him." Gabby spoke roughly from her spot beside the table, Antonio's spine straightening as he heard the anger in his sister's voice, Matt releasing a heavy sigh before he walked closer to his wife.
"Tell me what?" The detective questioned, Gabby raising her eyebrows towards Matt, responding before he could.
"That guy threatened to come back and kill him." She responded, missing the look of complete shock that covered her brother's face as her narrow gaze was on her husband, Antonio's eyes snapping towards Casey.
"What?"
"The guy who tried to kill him, he told Matt he was a dead man before he ran off." Gabby clarified, Antonio raising his eyebrows before stepping away from the counter, moving closer to the couple.
"That wasn't in any of the reports, why didn't you tell me?" The older Dawson asked, his question earning a scoff from his little sister.
"He didn't tell anyone, Antonio." She replied, Matt giving her a regretful look, but Gabby didn't react, Antonio shaking his head before looking back to his brother.
"Alright, just tell me exactly what happened-"
"I just told you what happened." Gabby bit out exasperatedly, the detective narrowing his eyes towards his sister.
"I need to hear it from Matt, Gabs. Now what happened?" He asked, Gabby shaking her head as she began pacing back and forth beside the table.
"Yeah, I would've loved to hear it from him, too." She responded with a scoff, Antonio shooting her a look before returning his attention back to Matt, seeing the man more focused on Gabby than anything else.
"Casey." He spoke again, gaining his brother's attention. "Tell me what happened."
Sparing one last glance at his wife, Matt released a deep breath, looking back towards Antonio before beginning to explain everything. Although there wasn't much to explain from what Antonio already knew, he had left out a big part of what happened that day, neither the detective nor his wife looking too pleased with him by the time he finished.
"So this guy threatened to kill you before he left, after he'd already threatened Gabby and Sofia, and you didn't tell anyone?" The detective asked, clearly trying to understand what had been going through Casey's head, Matt running his hand over his mouth, taking a steadying breath.
"I… I thought I was doing the right thing, I didn't want to worry her. I didn't think he'd actually do anything." He replied, Matt wincing as his own words left his mouth, knowing how naive he sounded. "I'm sorry, I am- I fucked up, I know I did, but I just… I wasn't thinking straight after any of this happened, and by the time I finally was starting to feel like myself again, I just thought it was all over. I'm sorry." He apologized, Antonio's face softening slightly, although the same couldn't be said for Gabby.
"Alright…" Antonio started, his tongue poking out between his teeth as he tried to figure out how to respond. He didn't understand why Matt hadn't told anyone, why the firefighter had kept this to himself for so long, but he also knew how much this entire ordeal had messed with Casey's head. Antonio knew Matt would never do anything to knowingly put Gabby or Sofia in danger, which is why he knew Matt was telling the truth about why he hadn't said anything. Despite the anger and confusion he felt from Casey keeping this to himself, he knew getting upset with Matt wouldn't help anything, especially considering Gabby was already pissed off as it was. "Has anything else happened recently? Aside from your truck, was there anything else that might make you think this was him?"
Furrowing his eyebrows slightly, Matt wracked his brain as he tried to think of anything that might be cause for concern, anything that might point to this man coming back to make good on his threat, but he was coming up empty. Nothing out of the ordinary had happened recently, nothing except-
"Our power." Gabby spoke up before he could, Matt looking towards his wife, realization washing over them at the same time.
"What?" Antonio asked.
"Remember, before Christmas, when the power in our building was out." Gabby started, Antonio soon remembering his sister telling him about that, the detective taking a deep breath.
"It was just your building, right?" Antonio asked for clarification, although he already knew the answer, Matt nodding slowly. "Your landlord said it looked like it had been tampered with…" Gabby brought her hands up to cover her face as she stopped her pacing, Matt's eyes falling closed as he pressed a firm hand against his forehead, trying to will away the headache beginning to pound in his skull. "Did you guys ever hear any other explanations about that?" He questioned, Matt shaking his head as he looked towards Gabby, his wife lifting her head the second he looked to her, Casey seeing the fear shining in her eyes.
"...Do you think he did that, too?" She asked hesitantly, the older Dawson pursing his lips together, shrugging his shoulders slightly.
"I don't know. Really, I don't. I don't know if he's doing all of this, or none of it. I don't know if this could all just be a coincidence, but considering he threatened Casey, I doubt it... I think something's going on here." Antonio replied firmly, glancing out towards the bullpen. "Is there anything else? Any other weird thing that happened?" He asked, Gabby's eyes darting towards her husband, Matt seeing a look he couldn't quite read. "Any other person at all we might wanna look at, too?"
"Naomi." Gabby spoke softly, Matt clenching his eyes shut for a second, Antonio's eyebrows narrowing slightly.
"Naomi?" He asked, glancing towards his sister. "Who is- Oh…" Realization suddenly washed over him, the name triggering memories from before his sister came back, the detective looking towards Matt.
"Yeah. Naomi. Matt's ex-girlfriend." Gabby replied sharply, Casey lifting his head as he gave her a pointed stare.
"She wasn't my girlfriend, you know that." Matt responded, Gabby scoffing lightly.
"Fine. Your fuck buddy, your late night booty call, whatever you wanna call her, we saw her at the grocery store like an hour ago." Gabby spoke shortly, Casey shaking his head before running his hand over his mouth. "Matt says he hasn't seen or talked to her in over a year, so seeing her now… the timing's a little weird."
"I haven't seen or talked to her." Matt repeated, not liking the tone Gabby was using, almost like she was questioning whether or not she believed him. He knew she was pissed off, and he knew she was projecting her anger with him onto the Naomi situation, but he didn't want to give her, or Antonio, any reason to think he'd been lying. "The last time I saw her was the last time Gabby did, and that was right after she got back."
"And you all think she might've done this?" Antonio asked, trying to get whatever information he could before this turned into a fight.
"I don't know, maybe. I hardly know the woman. But you're asking us to give you other possibilities, she's the only other person I can think of who has a problem with us. She was upset back when Matt ended things with her, and she didn't seem like she'd really moved past that when we saw her today." Gabby told her brother, her arms crossed over her chest as both Dawsons looked towards Matt.
"Casey, what about you?" Antonio asked, the firefighter raising his eyebrows. "Do you think she'd do this?"
Matt sighed, sparing a quick glance towards his wife, seeing her angry eyes shining back at him. "...No, I don't, if I'm being honest. I don't think she was ever even expecting to see us, let alone do something like this. Gabby said the same thing in the car, how when we saw her, she seemed surprised. Like she didn't think we'd even still be together…"
"Why do you say that?" Antonio asked, Matt's eyes flashing to Gabby. "Did she say something?" He prodded, the firefighter sighing softly before responding.
"...Back when this all first happened, after Gabby got back, Naomi told me how Gabby would just end up leaving me again." Matt spoke with a grimace, seeing the harsh stare on his wife's face, Casey knowing she couldn't be happy hearing this for the first time, especially considering the reason they were here was because of something he'd kept from her. "And then tonight when she saw Sofia, she basically said that Gabby stayed this time because I got her pregnant-" Matt stopped when he heard Gabby scoff, the firefighter watching as she rolled her eyes, the younger Dawson continuing to pace beside the table. "...So I don't even think she knew Gabby was still in town. And she looked just as surprised to see me, too… I don't think she did this." Matt spoke, Antonio giving him a nod. "But it is a possibility I guess. Like Gabby said, the timing is weird."
"Alright…" Antonio breathed out, the tension in the room palpable. "We'll look into her, too. Just to cover our bases." He told them, Gabby giving him a slight nod, her arms crossed tightly over her chest as she focused on the ground. "I'm gonna go talk to Voight, fill him in on everything then we'll go from there, okay? Just give me a minute." The detective spoke, more so towards his sister, keeping his voice steady. It was clear she was upset, and considering how she refused to even look at Matt, Antonio was sure things were bound to get worse before they got better.
Although from where he was standing, even though he may be biased, he knew his sister had every right to be pissed off. She absolutely did. But as a former husband and current father, he did see where Casey was coming from. This wasn't a black and white situation, but Antonio just hoped that he and the unit could figure this out soon, knowing the longer this went on, the more damage it could cause between his sister and Matt.
"Thanks Tonio." Gabby replied, lifting her head for a moment to give her brother a grateful, albeit weak, smile, Antonio nodding in response before moving towards the door, obvious tension still present around him. As he opened the door, he spared one last glance to his sister before he left the room, closing the door behind him.
The air around the couple was thick, Gabby keeping her eyes firmly on the ground as they stood a few feet apart, Matt's eyes bouncing towards their still sleeping baby before he focused his attention on his wife. From her body language alone, he could see she was closing herself off to him; she didn't want to even look at him, so he couldn't imagine she wanted much comfort from him right now. But he still needed to know she was okay. He'd dropped a bomb on her out of nowhere, he needed to know how she was feeling, even though he had a pretty good idea of what was going on in her head.
"Gabby…" He spoke carefully, watching as she slowly lifted her head, Matt seeing a million different emotions playing throughout her deep brown eyes, and none of them were good.
"Is there anything else I don't know?" Her voice was firm, Matt picking up on the anger she was feeling as the short words left her lips, the firefighter taking a few steps to be closer to her, knowing she was either about to break down or blow up, and he wasn't sure which one was worse. "Anything else your girlfriend said about me that you'd like to share?" She asked sarcastically, Matt pursing his lips together as he bit back his response, knowing she'd only push harder if he tried to fight her on it. "Any other people threaten your life recently? I mean, I feel like that's something I'd know about already, but apparently I don't know much of anything going on with you."
"That's not fair." He responded, her eyes narrowing instantly, Gabby's defenses rising.
"You wanna talk about not fair? Some psychotic, drugged out murderer threatened your life, and you didn't tell me. You kept that to yourself, because…? Why, exactly? Why would you not tell me when we have Sofia to worry about? Why would you think this would just go away?" Her voice was steadily raising as she spoke, her entire body on edge as Matt reached out for her, knowing this was only going to get worse.
"I thought I was doing the right thing, I thought-"
"Don't touch me, Matt." She barked when he grabbed ahold of her arm, Gabby practically ripping herself from his grasp, Casey taking a slight step back as she moved away from him, anger coming off her in waves.
"Baby-"
"No! You don't get to do that." She replied forcefully. "You don't get to swoop in and try and make this better after you spent the last month and half lying to me! This man not only threatened you, but he threatened your daughter! And you didn't tell anyone! That's not okay, Matt. You can't keep lying to me!"
"I haven't lied to you-"
"Bullshit." She cut in with a scoff, Matt having to fight to urge to reach out and try and comfort her, knowing he was bound to get snapped at again. "You lied to me about this, about Naomi-"
"I never lied to you about her." He interjected defensively, Gabby rolling her eyes.
"You never told me what she said about me, and how she apparently said things again tonight. Not only about me, but Sofia too. You not telling me is the same as lying, Matt. You keep lying to me." She challenged, swallowing the thick lump that had formed in her throat.
"I didn't tell you because I knew there was no point. Because I know how much everything that happened with all that upset you." He replied, trying to keep his cool as Gabby blinked quickly. "And I know how upset you still are about it, I know all this coming up again is why you're so angry…" He spoke, Gabby's eyes narrowing in disbelief. "Seeing her upset you enough, why would I make that worse?"
"Are you serious right now? You really think I'm only angry because we saw your ex-girlfriend?" She responded quickly, her muscles clenched in aggravation, Gabby not bothering to stop herself from rolling her eyes. "Yeah, because I care more about seeing the woman you fucked in our bed than I do about learning some guy threatened to come back and kill you. Sure, that's my only problem here." Gabby added sarcastically, Matt shaking his head before he took a deep breath.
"Clearly it still upsets you, Gabby. And I'm not saying you're wrong for it, but I know that's part of why you're so angry right now, and I-"
"God, can you please quit making this about your ex-... whatever the hell she was, that doesn't matter! This is about you lying to me, and about you keeping things from me, about you not telling me that some crazy man threatened to kill you!" Her voice was getting angrier as she spoke, Matt seeing the hurt and pain behind her rage as her eyes shone back at him. "Yeah, I don't exactly like thinking about you and Naomi, and I could've gone my whole life without ever seeing her again, but that doesn't matter when someone threatened to kill you and you kept that from me! That's the problem here, is you constantly not telling me things. Don't try and turn this into something it's not."
"Gabby-"
"I mean, this is the exact same thing you got so mad at me for before we got divorced, isn't it?" She asked forcefully, missing the flicker of darkness that flashed in his eyes, her words tearing through him as Gabby shook her head angrily. "You were upset with me because you felt like I was trying to handle everything on my own, you felt like I was leaving you out of things that affected us both, that I was keeping things from you… How is this any different?"
"Because I was trying to protect you!" He defended, Matt not liking the direction this conversation was going as he took a step closer to her, Gabby pressing her hand over her head. "I never told you what Naomi said because I knew how hurt you were, how much my mistakes had upset you already, why would I hurt you more when what she said didn't matter? And I know this thing now isn't the same, I know I should've told you after it happened, but don't throw our divorce back in my face when that situation was completely different. We had more problems than just us holding back from one another, that's not fair and you know it." He replied quickly, Gabby taking a deep breath. "I know I went about it the wrong way, but all I was trying to do was protect you-"
"I don't need your fucking protection, I need you to be honest with me." She spat, shaking her head as her anger began to come back in waves. "This affects me, too. This affects our baby, you had no right to not tell me. You keep talking about what's not fair, when the only thing not fair is you keeping this from me. You had no right, I deserved to know."
"I'm sorry." He responded as soon as she finished talking, Gabby bringing her hands up to cradle the sides of her face, the paramedic having to take steadying breaths to calm herself down, or else she'd only get more worked up. "I should've told you, I know that… But I was such a mess after it happened, I could hardly think straight. I'm sorry." He told her, Gabby clenching her eyes together tightly as she thought over his words, her thoughts going back to the days just after all this had happened, Gabby taking a deep breath before responding.
"...I know how hard all this has been on you... what that day did to you, and how much you struggled getting past it. What happened was awful, and I know how difficult it was for you to move on from that." She started, Matt hearing compassion in her voice despite her anger. "I know everything from that day messed with you Matt, I know that, but that's not an excuse for you keeping this from me for this long. This man threatened your life, you should have told me."
"I know." He agreed quickly, Gabby's eyes falling closed as she heard his soft voice. "I know I should have, and I'm not trying to use it as an excuse, but I can't take it back. I can't change it, but I am sorry. I thought I was doing the right thing-"
"Yeah, but that wasn't your choice to make, I still deserved to know-"
"I thought I was doing the right thing." He repeated firmly, Gabby pursing her lips together as she breathed deeply, Matt trying to get her to understand. "I know now that I wasn't, but after it happened, I thought I was. You know I'd never do anything that might harm you or Sofia. But I messed up, and I'm sorry." He breathed out, Gabby's hands dropping down to her sides. "But we don't even know that this is him," He countered, her eyes narrowing slightly. "This could be nothing but some weird coincidences, we have no idea what this is-"
"You really think that after he threatened all of us, then our power gets cut off and your tires get slashed, you think that's nothing? Who else would be doing all this?... No one, aside from the psycho who tried to kill you once already." She replied sharply, Matt releasing a deep sigh. "The same man who murdered a woman in cold blood, who shot a kid in the back without any hesitation. You really think he'd stop at a baby? He'd have no problem doing something to Sofia," Gabby's bottom lip started to tremble as her voice faltered, Matt's eyes shining with the pain and sadness he knew she was feeling. "If the power being messed with was him, he already knows where we live. What if he comes and tries to hurt her?"
"That's not gonna happen, Gabby, we-"
"You don't know that!" She shouted, tears forming in her eyes as Matt took a slight step back, the force of her words surprising him, his heart breaking when he saw the fear and hurt in her gaze.
The sound of Sofia beginning to fuss snapped them from their heated trance, the door opening grabbing Matt's attention.
"Guys…" Antonio said after he'd poked his head in, Gabby clenching her jaw tightly to keep her tears at bay as she looked to her brother, seeing a concerned look on his face. Looking past him through the windows, Gabby saw everyone from Intelligence watching them, the paramedic taking a short, shaky breath as she realized that most, if not all, of her and Matt's argument had been heard by the detectives.
Blinking quickly to get rid of the tears forming in her eyes, Gabby looked towards her brother as Matt moved to get Sofia, knowing their baby's sleep had been disturbed by all the yelling. "Can we go?" Gabby asked quickly, hating the sympathetic look her brother was giving her. She knew he meant well, but she didn't want his pity; she just wanted to go home.
Glancing back and forth between the couple, Antonio nodded, Gabby releasing a relieved breath as Matt got their daughter calmed down, Sofia soon falling back asleep as he rocked her car seat.
"Yeah, I don't need anything else from you guys right now… But I am putting a protective detail on you." He spoke, Matt's eyebrows raising slightly. "At least for right now, just to be safe." Antonio added, Gabby giving him a nod before walking towards her family, carefully pulling the cover down over Sofia before she grabbed ahold of the handle. "I already talked to Platt, they should be down there waiting… You all don't need to do anything different, they're just there to keep an eye out."
"Okay." Gabby responded, lifting the car seat and heading towards the door. "Thanks Tonio." She murmured, the older Dawson nodding as he pulled her in for a quick hug.
"It'll be okay, sis." He spoke softly, pressing a kiss to the side of her head before they pulled back, Gabby moving the brunt of Sofia's weight to her other hand. "I'll keep you guys updated if I find out anything, alright?" He told them, Gabby nodding before she walked out of the break room, heading straight for the stairs.
Releasing a heavy breath, Matt pushed himself up from the couch, wringing his hands together as he moved towards Antonio, Casey unable to read the look on his brother's face. "...I never meant for any of this to happen." He spoke, earning an understanding nod from the detective.
"I know you didn't, and she knows you didn't…" Antonio replied, nodding out towards the bullpen, Matt glancing to see Gabby already beginning down the stairs with Sofia. "And honestly, us knowing from the beginning probably wouldn't have changed anything. We still don't know who this guy is, or if this guy is even who's doing this… But we're gonna do everything we can to find out." He promised, Matt nodding as the older Dawson clasped him on the shoulder. "...But I also understand why my sister is so upset."
"I know, I do too… I know I messed up. I just wish none of this ever happened." Casey breathed out, Antonio squeezing his shoulder before dropping his hand, Matt moving through the door.
"We're gonna do everything we can to find this guy. And we'll make sure you're protected until we do." Antonio promised one last time, Casey giving him a nod before heading in the direction his wife had gone, Matt jogging to catch up with her even though he knew he was probably the last person she wanted to be around right now.
Casey glanced to the clock above the stove as he put the last of their groceries away in the pantry, the firefighter releasing a soft sigh as he closed the cabinet door, his eyes bouncing around the quiet apartment.
It was barely even two in the afternoon, the Caseys having gotten back from the district about fifteen minutes ago, Matt and Gabby immediately going in separate directions once they got inside. While Matt was still bringing the groceries in from their late morning shopping trip, the below freezing temperatures having kept their things cold as they made the stop to see Antonio, Gabby had gotten a bottle ready for Sofia.
When they were close to home, their little girl had woken up with a start, the baby's cries filling the otherwise silent car, their inability to immediately calm her down adding to the tension that was already present. The second Matt had gotten the car in park, Gabby was out the door, rushing to Sofia's aid while he began unloading their shift bags, his wife not even bothering to wait for him before she went inside. He had seen her in the kitchen warming up Sofia's bottle while he was making his trips inside with their stuff and the groceries, but by the time he finished his last trip Gabby was gone, Matt coming inside to an empty kitchen and their bedroom door shut.
If her silence in the car hadn't been enough of a sign she needed space, the closed door was, Matt deciding to leave her alone for the time being as he put the groceries away. But now that he had completed that task, he wasn't sure what to do.
He wanted to go and be with her, and their baby. He wanted to sit down and talk to her, but he wasn't sure that was the best idea.
They'd hardly said two words to one another since they left the police station, Matt able to tell the second they got outside that the best thing he could give her right now was space. She needed time to cool off after the fight they'd had. He'd thrown a lot at her, and he knew she needed a minute to just breathe and come to terms with everything she found out today. He completely understood that.
But he didn't like the distance she was putting between them. And he definitely didn't want it to stay that way.
He deserved to be yelled at, she had every right to be upset with him, he knew that. And he didn't care if she spent the next month pissed off at him, he just didn't want her to continue to pull away from him. He could take the anger, he could take the yelling, but what he couldn't take was the silence. When Gabby would shut down and get too caught up in her own head, that's what he didn't want.
Feeling a pounding headache begin to form behind his eyes, Matt pressed against the side of his skull, shaking his head quickly before moving towards the cabinet where they housed their medicine, the firefighter quickly pulling out some aspirin. He'd seemingly had this headache all day, at least since he and Gabby finished at the store, Casey knowing the stress of today hadn't helped the pressure in his head at all.
Popping a few of the pills into his mouth, Matt grimaced as he swallowed them, the man putting the bottle away before looking around the empty apartment once more, Casey walking towards the clean living room they'd come home to.
He'd almost been hoping there'd be a mess he could clean up, that, Sofia being Sofia, had left a trail in her wake as the baby always did, his daughter leaving quite the mess behind for someone who couldn't get around on their own yet. But, to no surprise, the living room was practically spotless when they got home earlier this morning, something Matt knew was Becca's doing. She always left the apartment cleaner than how she found it, and while both Gabby and Matt had told her time and time again that it wasn't necessary, she continued to do it. It was something both parents were thankful for, although at times like this, Matt would've liked if there was something that had been left behind, something that he could use distract himself. But he was out of luck, Matt sighing as he turned towards the closed bedroom door.
Casey knew going in there probably wouldn't end well, but whatever sort of reaction she gave him was preferable to this strangling quiet, the firefighter taking the few steps towards their door, slowly turning the knob.
When he pushed the door open, he wasn't surprised to see Gabby sitting in the glider in the corner, his wife's leg hiked up onto the seat beside her while she cradled Sofia in her arms, Gabby feeding their daughter. Taking slow steps, Matt entered the room, knowing Gabby was well aware of his presence, but she hadn't acknowledged it. Without a word, he continued towards her, placing his body down on the bench at the end of their bed, wanting to keep just a little bit of space between them, figuring Gabby probably preferred it that way.
They sat in a tense quiet for a few moments, Matt watching as Sofia eagerly ate her food, the little girl's hands resting up on the bottle, the sight bringing a soft smile to the father's face. Even though she didn't have the strength to hold it up on her own quite yet, she was starting to understand the concept; that holding up the bottle meant she got fed. And over the past few days, both Gabby and Matt had noticed that Sofia had started to place her hands on the bottle whenever she ate, which was an encouraging sight to the young parents, both of them knowing this was the first step in her being able to hold her own bottle. Even though they were most likely a couple months out from that, it was encouraging, Matt and Gabby always eager to see any developments in their daughter's motor skills.
"Are the cops outside?"
Gabby's voice caught him off guard, Matt peeling his eyes from his daughter up towards his wife, seeing her gaze still focused on the baby in her arms. Knowing she'd be expecting an answer, Matt cleared his throat, leaning forward to rest on his knees.
"Yeah, they are…" He told her, Gabby giving him a slight nod in response. "I saw them while I was bringing the stuff in, they're parked across the street. I mean, they're in that unmarked car, so hopefully they don't alarm the neighbors, but they're there." He spoke softly, Gabby giving him another nod, rubbing her finger across Sofia's soft cheek, the baby smiling slightly behind the bottle.
"Good… that's good." She murmured, continuing to stroke Sofia's skin, Gabby finding the action comforting. "That makes me feel better that they're out there."
"Me too." He agreed, unsure of where this conversation was headed, but he was just glad she was talking to him. "Your, uh… Your brother said he'd keep the detail on us until they've figured this out, so that'll be good… Just for peace of mind." Matt added, Gabby gnawing on her bottom lip.
"Yeah, that's probably for the best… If it is that guy who's doing this, who knows what he'll do." She replied, Matt pursing his lips together as his head hung forward, the firefighter rubbing his hand along the back of his neck, trying to relieve some of the tension that had been building up there.
Gabby was much calmer than she'd been at the district, Matt could tell that from the small amount of time he'd been in here. Though he knew she was probably still angry, that anger didn't seem to be consuming her like it had been an hour ago. But what was left was somehow worse, Matt sensing the fear, and hurt, and worry she was feeling right now, Gabby like an open book to him as he sat across from her.
She was scared, and he hated it. And it's exactly why he didn't want to tell her in the first place.
But, as Gabby had pointed out to him many times, that didn't matter. He should've told her a hell of a long time ago, and all he could hope was that she'd forgive him sooner rather than later.
"I, uh-" He started, clearing his throat. "I know I said it already, but I just want to tell you again how sorry I am." He told her, Gabby looking up at him for the first time since he had walked into their bedroom, her brown eyes shining at him. "I'm really sorry for keeping this from you. I thought I was doing the right thing, but this affects you, and it affects our girl. You deserved to know… I'm sorry, baby." Matt apologized, Gabby taking a deep breath before she looked back down, seeing Sofia begin to doze off, her bottle nearly empty.
"I know you are." She replied quietly, Matt running his tongue along the inside of his cheek.
"You were right earlier, what you said about this being like what hurt us last time… I didn't see it that way, but you're right. I just… I didn't think this guy was serious." He spoke, Gabby looking back towards him. "I thought he was just pissed off, and probably a little scared of being caught, but I didn't think he meant what he was saying, that he'd ever actually try and do anything." Matt told her, watching as her eyebrows furrowed slightly, uncertainty written all over her face.
"...He tried to kill you the first time, I don't see how you just automatically assumed he wasn't serious." She replied, but her tone wasn't accusatory, she was just confused, like she didn't understand his reasoning. And truthfully, hearing himself say it out loud, Matt didn't understand it either.
"I don't know… I wish I had a better answer for you, but I don't. It was stupid, I fucked up and I know that." He told her, Gabby swallowing thickly. "You deserved to know, no matter how much all this messed with my head, I should've told you." He added, seeing her face soften slightly. "But me not telling you, that was completely on me… It wasn't because I felt like I couldn't, I just didn't want to scare you, when I knew I'd already freaked you out enough over this whole thing. It's a shitty excuse, I know it is, but I really thought I was doing the right thing… You and Sofia, you're my entire world. You two are the only thing that matters, and I'd never do anything to intentionally put either of you in danger."
"I know that." She responded, interjecting his rambling, Matt taking a deep breath. "I know you thought you were doing what was best, but that wasn't your decision to make, Matt. I know I don't need to keep telling you this, I know you know that you messed up. And you already know how I feel about all this, I just- this is a lot." She breathed out, Matt giving her an understanding nod. "All of this is a lot to process, so I just need a minute."
"Alright." He replied, rubbing his hands over his legs before slowly standing up, his eyes moving towards Sofia, seeing the little girl half asleep. "Do you want me to watch her for a bit? So you can get some rest?" He offered, Gabby biting down on her bottom lip before nodding, Matt reaching for their baby without hesitation. They moved carefully, not wanting to disturb her, Sofia soon cradled in her dad's arms. "I've got her for awhile, we'll be out there if you need anything." Matt told her, Gabby giving him a tight nod before he began moving towards the door, knowing the best thing he could do for her right now was give her the space she was asking for.
His steps slowed when he got to the doorway, Gabby glancing to him as he turned around, seeing a regretful look in his eye. "...I love you." He spoke softly, Gabby's tired eyes softening before she nodded.
"I love you too." She replied quietly, Matt shooting her a small smile before he left the room, pulling the door closed behind him.
The second she was alone, Gabby hunched forward in her chair, the weight of everything hitting her as she cradled her head in her hands, thick tears forming in her eyes, Dawson doing what she could to keep everything under control. But it was useless, it all becoming too much as lone tears escaped down her cheeks, Gabby overwhelmed by everything that had happened today.
It wasn't just Matt lying to her, it wasn't just that he'd kept something from her. That wasn't what she was focused on right now as her body trembled in her seat.
The man that had not only threatened Matt's life, but tried to end it, could be coming back to make good on his promise. And that terrified her. Just the thought of something happening to him or Sofia scared her to death, and she didn't know how to handle it, Gabby reluctantly giving into her emotions as she cried silently in her bedroom, the weight of all this nearly suffocating her.
Gabby tossed and turned as she laid in bed, the empty space beside her seemingly swallowing her whole as she tried to get comfortable, but failed every time. Sparing a quick glance to the clock, she saw only minutes had passed since she last looked, seeing it was nearing one in the morning, the tired mom unable to get her brain to shut off and let her sleep.
It had been a long day in the Casey household, and up until she'd gone to bed, all she wanted was sleep. But now that she was in the position to get that, it was like she couldn't get her mind to shut up. And it didn't help that every little noise she heard left her on edge, the lack of Matt's comforting warmth beside her making it hard for her to fall asleep.
She hadn't asked him to sleep out on the couch, at least not directly. But Matt had been keeping his distance from her all day, and that hadn't changed when night came. Admittedly, she did need it. She needed that space from him, and she knew it had done her some good, giving her time to let go of the anger she was holding onto, but apparently Matt thought her needing space meant he couldn't sleep in their bed. Though she hadn't done much to make him think otherwise, either.
Matt had taken care of Sofia for most of the afternoon and evening today, her husband having her out in the living room with him until a few hours ago, giving Gabby time to get some rest that she desperately needed. She had slept off and on for a few hours, Gabby doing what she could to get sleep while she knew Sofia was being taken care of, Matt leaving her alone while she rested. He had checked on her once, Gabby having heard him come in after she'd been resting for awhile, but she had been half asleep when she registered his presence, and from what she could tell he hadn't stayed long. But other than that, he'd left her alone.
When it was time for Sofia to go to bed, he'd brought her back, Matt going through Sofia's nighttime routine while Gabby went to the kitchen to get something to eat, the two nothing more than passing ships before Sofia went to sleep.
By the time Gabby had finished her meal, Sofia was sound asleep, Matt sitting on the bed waiting for his wife to get back, neither of them really saying much after she first came in. It wasn't until Matt had spoke up, asking if she needed any help with Sofia that either of them acknowledged the other, Gabby giving him a quick response to his question, telling him she was fine. Then shortly after that, her husband had disappeared back into the living room, closing the door behind him.
And she hadn't seen him since.
Gabby appreciated the space he was giving her, she truly did, because she knew she needed it. But now, as she lay here alone in their bed, all she wanted was for him to be in here with her. Regardless of how she felt towards him right now, she didn't like the idea of him being out there on his own, not with everything going on. She'd feel safer in they were all together, she'd feel safer if he was here with her.
Blowing out a heavy sigh, Gabby tossed the covers off of herself, the cool air hitting her bare legs as she climbed out of bed. She paused a moment to check on her daughter, seeing Sofia still sound asleep in her bassinet, Gabby waiting a moment to make sure she was okay before she continued towards the door, slowly pulling it open.
The second the door was open, she saw Matt asleep on the couch, the light from the TV making him visible in the otherwise dark apartment, Gabby slowly padding her way into the living room, placing herself down on the coffee table in front of him. She took a second to look at him, Gabby immediately able to tell he wasn't exactly sleeping peacefully, his eyebrows furrowed even in his sleep as he had the blanket pulled all the way up under his chin, Matt doing what he could to protect himself from the cooler air out here in the living room, their heat only able to do so much with the single digit temperature outside.
Taking a deep breath, Gabby reached her hand out, tapping against his arm. He didn't stir at first, Gabby applying more pressure with each tap until her husband woke up, Matt immediately sitting up straight.
"What is it? What's wrong?" He asked in an instant, Gabby shaking her head as she placed her hand on his bare arm.
"Nothing's wrong." She replied, not meaning to have worried him, Matt giving her a nod before he pressed his hand against his eyes, clearly trying to wake himself up before he looked back towards her, Gabby coming into focus. "...I just can't sleep." She told him quietly, seeing an immediate frown form over his face, Matt nodding as he pushed the blanket off himself, planting his feet firmly on the ground, their bare legs brushing against one another.
Now that he was more alert, he noticed the tension her body held, a sight he definitely didn't like to see at this hour, Matt seeing how red and tired her eyes were. He knew she'd been crying today, Matt realizing it when he went to check on her earlier in the afternoon, and again when he was getting Sofia ready for bed. And he hated it, knowing this entire thing had upset her to the point of tears. But, at the very least, he hoped getting her emotions out made her feel a little better, even though he wished he could've been there to help her through it.
Without saying anything, he reached out towards her, placing his palm over her thigh, rubbing gently across her leg to provide her some comfort, Matt unsure of exactly what she wanted from him. But it didn't take him long to find out, Gabby soon standing back up, his hand falling from her leg.
"Can you, uh-..." She cleared her throat, glancing back towards the bedroom. "You can come back to bed, if you want." She murmured, Matt tongue poking out between his teeth as he nodded, seeing an immediate look of relief cover her face, Matt waiting for Gabby to begin walking before he stood up. He knew this was her asking him to come sleep with her, that she wanted him in there even if she couldn't say it, and that was something he'd never say no to. Before following her, Matt quickly turned the TV off, placing the remote back down on the coffee table before blindly walking that familiar path to their bedroom, Matt's steps being helped by the lamp she had turned on in their room.
When he stepped inside, he saw Gabby stop to check on Sofia before she climbed into her side, Matt walking towards their bed.
"Wait, um…" Her voice stopped him, Matt raising his eyebrows as he waited for her to continue. "Could you shut the door?" She requested, seeing his head tilt to the side slightly. "...It would just make me feel better." She told him quietly, his face softening before he nodded, Matt taking the few steps back towards their door, closing it in place against the frame.
Moving back towards the bed, he saw Gabby already making herself comfortable underneath the covers, her back facing him as she rested on her side, Matt climbing into bed as well, Gabby waiting until he got situated before she turned off the light, bathing the room in darkness.
"Are you okay?" He asked softly after a few seconds, Matt resting on his back while he watched her, seeing her torso rise and fall as she took a deep breath.
"Yeah… I guess I'm just a little on edge about all of this." She admitted, Matt nodding even though she couldn't see him.
"That's okay… I am too." He told her, carefully reaching out and placing his hand on her back, feeling her relax underneath his touch. "But I'm right here, everything's alright." He reminded her, Gabby nodding slowly before she snuggled deeper into the bed, Matt dropping his hand from her back, preparing to make himself comfortable as well, the man already feeling much more relaxed at being in their bed than he did out on the couch.
Just as he got settled, he saw Gabby carefully move her arm back behind her, a soft smile falling onto his face when he realized she was reaching out for him, Matt complying instantly as he grabbed her hand. She moved their conjoined hands around her waist, effectively pulling him towards her side of the bed as he pressed his chest into her back, Matt adjusting the covers around them to get comfortable before he returned his hand to her stomach, keeping her pressed firmly against him. The longer he held onto her, the more he felt her relax, Matt stroking his thumb over her stomach, her body molding into his perfectly just as it always had.
"...I'm still mad at you." She murmured sleepily, Matt biting back a smile at how innocent her voice sounded before he nodded, pressing a soft kiss to her shoulder.
"I know, baby." He replied, kissing her again before resting his head down on the pillow. "Just try and get some sleep." He told her, Gabby nodding before letting herself succumb to her exhaustion, the woman finally feeling secure enough to fall asleep, their legs tangled while they laid together, Matt refusing to rest until he was sure she was deep within her slumber.
So, how are we feeling? That was kind of a hard one, but it seemed to end better than it started, at least. As I mentioned before the chapter, I saw some mixed reviews about how Gabby should react, but honestly I just couldn't see any way where she wouldn't be pissed off. But hopefully it wasn't too difficult for you guys to get through, I tried to keep it tame.
I do have a question for you guys, or I guess I want your opinion on something. Since I first started posting one of my other stories, Whatever Comes Next, back in August, I've pretty much been posting two updates for each story once a week (aside from the last couple of weeks here), and while I've loved doing it, I don't think I can sustain that any more. I'm not burnt out yet, but I can feel myself getting there and I don't want to get to the point where writing feels more like a chore than something I enjoy doing. I love these stories too much to do that. And I just don't think I'm able to get out four chapters (sometimes five when I update my third story) a week anymore, so, I think what I'm gonna do is cut back to one update a week for this story and one for Whatever Comes Next, and see how that goes. I don't want to disappoint you guys, and I know a lot of you look forward to those updates twice a week, but I just don't think I can do it anymore. So my question is, would you all rather I update both stories on the same day (either posting both updates on Monday or both on Thursday), or would you rather I update one on Monday, and one on Thursday? I'm fine with either, it doesn't matter to me, I just want to do what you all would prefer. So if you could let me know, that would be so helpful.
And, I know I didn't really mention it above, but I am still definitely working on If We Never Say Goodbye, I just don't have a schedule for that one. That story is one where I just get it updated whenever I can, but that story is far from over, I have some big plans for it.
Well, now that I've talked enough, I hope you all enjoyed this one, even though it was kind of a rough one. But now that Gabby and Matt have both got their feelings out there, surely things can only get better for them, right?
Thanks for reading! I'll see you next time!