Teyla's Dilemma

by garggirl

Disclaimer:
All the characters appearing in this fic are copyright Cooper/Wright Company and Double Secret Productions.
No infringement of these copyrights is intended, and is not authorized by the copyright holder.
All original characters are the property of garggirl.

"It is well past time," Halling said, watching as Teyla paced back and forth in his tent. "In fact, were it not for the incident that forced us from our homeworld, and the preceeding events, the matter would have already been settled."

Teyla stopped pacing, her back to her oldest friend. "I am aware, but I do not which it to be so." Teyla turned her head slightly to look at Halling sidewardly. "I am not ready."

"Ready or not," Halling came up behind her, placing reassuring hands on her shoulders. "It is time for you to choose a husband, pass on your gift. By all accounts, this matter should've been settled years ago."

Teyla turned to look up at Halling full on. "I have no suitors, and the one I had been considering was taken by the Wraith." Teyla's gaze fell in sadness.

Both Athosians were silent as they remembered Toran. Halling's face dampened slightly as he remembered the last moments of his best friend's life aboard the hive ship before he was taken.

Halling forcably pulled himself from his tortured thoughts.

"Regardless," he continued, his voice hushed. "You must choose. There are many eligible Athosians who would gladly wish to be joined to you." Halling hooked a gentle digit under Teyla's chin and raised her gaze to meet his. "But no one ever said he had to be Athosian."

------

Teyla walked the massive halls of Atlantis, Halling's words echoing in her mind. It was time to choose. But who to choose? Since her people relocated to the mainland, Teyla felt herself becoming closer to the Earth humans, but nothing that could ever be considered as romantic, could there?

Well, that wasn't entirely true. Many of the male population was pleasant enough to look at but couldn't possibly be considered as marriage material.

Teyla lost herself in her thoughts, and before she realized it, she found herself in the Control Room. Scientist and soldier alike bustled here and there as they tended to their daily duties. Slowly, the Athosian woman wove her way through the room as she tried to get out of people's way, up the stairs, and to the balcony over-looking the Gaterium.

Hands grasping the railing, Teyla leaned forward slightly, intently watching those down below. Watching as Rodney, with his arms crossed, listened to something Zelenka was telling him. The Chief Scientific Advisor had his head down, staring at the floor, his expression neutral.

Rodney McKay. An interesting candidate. A brilliant man to say the least. Tall, fairly strong, and rather easy on the eyes. However, his negative qualities seemed to out-weigh the positive ones. Dr. McKay might make an fine husband and father for some woman, but Teyla wasn't all too sure that she was that woman. She had enough trouble putting up with the man's eccentricities for five minutes. She could not, for the life of her, imagine doing such for a lifetime. It was far more likely he would drive her to insanity before long.

Of course, there was Radek Zelenka. Equally as brilliant and so much easier to get along with. But he, too, was a person Teyla could not see a romantic relationship with. He was kind and funny and pleasant, to be sure, but Radek seemed to make a better friend than a lover, and that kind of relationship was much more cherished by the Athosians than any other. Teyla refused to do anything to jeopardize it.

Zelenka finally finished speaking, and McKay looked up to meet the man's eyes. Even from Teyla's perch was it easy to see McKay's response, delivered with a tiny smile. "No." And he turned and walked away. The Cezch was still for a moement, obviously a little taken aback, then looked up, balling his hands into fists. Then, audibly, she heard him yell to McKay's retreating back.

"What do you mean, no! You cannot just say no!" and he chased after him.

Teyla chuckled inwardly at the witnessed exchange despite the problem weighing heavily on her mind.

At that moment. Lt. Col. Sheppard stormed into the room, anger clearly raditating off the man.

"McKay!" he bellowed, the tension cutting through the air like a knife, causing several people, Teyla included, to jump in surprise.

Zelenka and McKay both turned from their argument, and McKay's voice answered, peevishly, "What?"

"Get your ass over here!"

Ah, the incomperable John Sheppard. A man whose company Teyla truly and wholly-heartedly enjoyed. She had often heard others describe John as a 'Ladies Man'. She had once asked for clarification of the term and was replied to with "a guy who thinks he's God's gift to women." Like McKay, Sheppard was eccentric, causing Teyla and her people to be completely lost regarding many of the things he said. He was handsome and charming, and he too had a friendship with Teyla she would not wish to ruin, but truth be told, out of all the men on Atlantis, he would definitely be in the forerunning.

Just like so many other times, John and Rodney argued, rather loudly, in the middle of the Gate Room. In the early days, the display caused many a person to fall silent during the heated exchange. Now, barely anyone batted an eyelash. It was just one of the things they had become accustomed to as the days in the Pegasus galaxy wore on.

"Dr. McKay," a different voice echoed from the area below, and Teyla instantly cringed, recognizing the nasal quality of the voice. Turning her head slightly, Teyla watched as Dr. Kavanagh appeared and approached the astrophysicist.

Kavanagh. This was a man, and she used that term loosely, that instantly made her skin crawl at the mere thought of being bonded to. A nine year old trapped in a man's body. He was arrogant, self-absorbed, and pig-headed. True. Dr. McKay possessed the same negative qualities, but he was nothing compared to Kavanagh. Kavanagh truly made them an art form. If Teyla were to consider him for bonding, she would also consider flinging herself off the Control Room tower immediately after the ceremony. What was it Earth humans said? 'Til death do us part?' She would do everything in her power to ensure the 'death' part came as quickly as possible.

With a sigh, Teyla cast a glance towards Dr. Weir's office. Through the transparent partition, Teyla could see Dr. Weir in ernest discussion with Dr. Beckett. Teyla cocked her head in thought.

Carson Beckett. Now here was a man who was, like most of the others, brilliant beyond all recall. He, too, had a pleasantness that Teyla found herself eerily drawn to, and while, yes, many things Carson said seemed foreign to Teyla and her people, he had a wit that was not wholly unlike many of the Athosians. It truly frightened Teyla sometimes on how comfortable she felt around the Chief Medical Officer. If she were to close her eyes when speaking to this man, Teyla could almost see her own father in her mind's eye. Beckett was among the few Earth humans who truly accepted, and respected, the Athosian way of life. Yes, Dr. Beckett would be among the forerunning.

Looking back down on the Gatrium floor, Teyla was surprised to see Lt. Ford having joined McKay, Zelenka and Sheppard. He stood there quietly while the older men verbally sparred.

Aiden Ford. True, he was the only one closest to Teyla's own age, but the young man was too regiment and tended to be a little intense and by-the book. While yes, he was very pleasant to look at, Ford's demeanor and personality struck a sore spot in Teyla's heart, painfully reminding her of her lost love, Toran.

The thought seared her heart and Teyla hung her head low. None of the possibilities had helped her to reach a decision. She was completely at a loss of what to tell Halling. The death of Toran killed the part of her that could love, let alone love anyone else. There was only one answer she could give Halling now.

------

The following morning, Teyla stood nervously outside Halling's tent. She had mulled over everything she would need to said all through the night, losing much sleeply in the process. With a heavy, cleansing sigh, Teyla enter the tent.

As she knew he would be, Halling sat cross-legged on the floor, deep in meditation: a preparation she knew was for her arrival. In a moment, Halling's dark eyes opened and he smiled slightly.

"Ah, Teyla," he motioned to a space beside him. "I trust you've come with a decision to our conversation."

Teyla sat down. "I have." She paused in an attempt to gather her thoughts. "After much time, carefully weighing the options laid before me, I have reached a decision." Teyla took a cleansing breath. "I will not take a husband."

A look of frustration shrouded over Halling's features. "Teyla, we have been over this. You must pass on your gift so future generations may have warning against the Wraith."

"I understand that," she replied. "By why must the gift come from my lineage? There have been others whose gifts are much stronger than my own. Why am I being pressed?"

Halling sighed. "Because those others are not the leader of our people."

"My point exactly."

Halling regarded Teyla with a strange look. "I do not understand."

"I am proposing that I name one of those whose gift is stronger as my successor." Teyla leaned forward. "There is no one, either Athosian nor Earth human, that I wish to be bonded to. Were I to appoint one of the younger generations to take my place as leader in the event of my death, a stronger gift could be passed on."

A long silence filled the air before Halling responded. "You understand that upon your death, your lineage ends with you."

"I do."

Halling sighed heavily. "Very well." He stood, helping Teyla up with him. "This matter has been settled. We will speak no more of it." Halling cast a brief smile to Teyla before exiting the tent, leaving Teyla alone to her own thoughts.

No longer would her mind be weighed down by such troublesome thoughts. She could return to Atlantis, represent her people's best interests until her death, and help the Earth humans restore the city to its former glory.

Then why did she feel she let Halling down?

THE END