Comfort has always meant sex to Tyler.
It started when he'd ran into Tara Patterson teary-eyed and flushed from a fight with his dad. She took him home and they got very close in her very, very small bed.
With Vicki it hadn't been so one-sided. He loved her in his own special way, he just didn't know how to show it outside of hooking up and jealousy. He was fucked up and she was definitely fucked up, sex seemed to be the only way they knew how to un-fuck themselves, even if it's just a short period of time.
In the beginning, he'd convinced himself that his relationship with Caroline had been a no strings attached thing. Being with her then when everything was so confusing and frustrating was comforting. That set the tone for their entire relationship.
So when Bonnie, who he knows is hurting just as much as he is, turns him away he's confused.
He's not really embarrassed and that may be because she lets him down in a way that doesn't hurt his feelings, that doesn't make him feel like he's a terrible person wanting comfort in the only way he knows how to get it. For that, he's grateful.
The motel room they're staying in for the night smells like smoke. Tyler'd offered to get them something nicer but she'd insisted that she was too tired to look for a five star hotel, "and really your tastes are way bougier than mine."
Bonnie's fresh out of the shower, a large t-shirt hanging off her small frame, smelling like milk and honey body wash in juxtaposition to the smoked out room. Her hair is sloppily thrown into a ponytail, face bare.
It's so easy to pull her to him, to kiss her, for his tongue to rub gently against hers. It must be easy for her to let him, because she does and when they pull apart she's breathless. But when he moves to press his lips against her neck she pushes him away, despite all of his senses telling him that's the last thing she wants to do.
"I don't think making love is really going to make us feel any better."
If it was anyone else he'd been with, he'd laugh at her choice of words, how old fashioned she was being. Making love was the last thing on his mind.
He'd trusted her with his life before, he'd definitely trusted her to be right about this. Any persuading he'd do would be to persuade them both.
She sighed, like maybe this whole leaving town thing together wasn't all it cracked up to be. They were still grieving and barely friends and it was a weird position to put yourself in.
"Tyler, let's just go to bed."
He climbs into the bed closest to the window and turns off his light. He'd expected Bonnie to climb into the other bed but the springs beneath him creak as he feels the bed dip. She lays beside him and runs her hand across his cheek.
"We could still cuddle if you like."
"Yeah. I'd like that."
When he waits for her to move she stares at him and laughs. "I don't think you know how this works...you turn your body like this," she said, pushing him to face the opposite direction. He'd felt her warm body press up against his back and she pulls the quilt over them. Hesitantly he feels an arm creep around his midsection and she squeezes.
She whispers, warm breath tickling the back of her neck, "is this okay?"
Tyler'd never been the little spoon, never been held like this. And it felt weird, like he was turned inside out, like this was an experience to definitely file in the "wrong" category. But it did feel a little nice. Her heartbeat thumping in his ears wrapped around him like a blanket.
"It's good, feels nice." He's sure if he was alive, his face would be burning. Bonnie hums and pull him in a little tighter.
They hadn't set any plans only to get out of Mystic Falls and never look back. Both of them had been gone all summer, Bonnie dead and Tyler had been helping a werewolf he'd met through one of the (now) dead hybrids. There were no more phone calls from Caroline for him. Her friends thought that she'd moved on. That she'd found some sort of peace because she wasn't visiting Jeremy anymore.
Bonnie being alive again was based on one thing, Qetsiyah wanting her to be. When her ancestor had given her another chance, it wasn't because she needed her.
"I just know what it feels like to be betrayed. And I've let that betrayal fuel my actions for thousands of years...a little extreme I know, but it's no one's ever betrayed me since. You on the other hand, my dear sweet self-sacrificing Bonnie, don't know when enough is enough.. That's how you ended up in the basement with all of your friends moving on without you. Why you're dead and they're out there living."
I saw your little funeral, it was very sweet of them I must say. It's the perfect way for you to truly say goodbye. If that boy can no longer see you then he'll think you moved on, that you've found peace."
"What are you saying?"
"I'm saying that I'll give you another chance. The other side was created by me and I make the rules and I want you alive. I'm very sorry about your father. If I could bring him back I would, but I can't do anything about humans. But I can help you."
"Why would you do that?"
"You're a good witch...you have so much potential, but no one will ever know that if you don't leave this life behind you. You will be betrayed, again. You will die prematurely, again. I will take it personally because I don't do a lot of favors for anyone. Get out of this town as soon as possible."
Bonnie was so confused and happy at the same time. She could be alive again, but she'd have to start over. Have to make new friends, start a new life.
"I'll take it...I can start over. I don't want to be dead"
Qtsyeiah smiled, and her smile was beautiful. "I'll give you a day or so to get your affairs in order, but it's imperative that you leave. Silas and I are currently having a...lover's spat," she laughed. "You will be pulled into it if you stay."
Qtseyiah walked towards her and touched her for the first time. This warmth flooded Bonnie's entire body.
"I can remove your memories if it would make the transition easier?"
"No, no...I'll just deal."
The older witch nodded and pulled Bonnie into an embrace. "I want nothing but the best for you."
Then it felt like her body was harvesting a small sun.
Bonnie wakes up in her own bed. The room in the same position she'd left it in the day she died.
"Third time's the charm."
She'd packed lightly. Some clothes, her grimoires, and photos. She'd taken her father's watch from his bedroom.
That's all.
She sits at her father's grave for hours. Just talking, wishing that things went a lot differently. She doesn't cry until she's rounding off hour three. It's starting to get dark outside and she should leave soon or she'll be on the road later than she'd like. When she stands she feels a firm hand on her shoulder and a feeling of death crawling up her spine. She'd let her guard down. She had to do better going forward. She feels her fingers itching to give an aneurysm but she stops. He's familiar. Tyler.
"I knew I could smell you. You're alive."
Bonnie hiccups and wipes at her face. "Shh, don't tell anyone." It's supposed to be a joke, but she can't get the seriousness out of her voice.
"I swear, I won't." Tyler toes the grass beside her, points at the headstone. "I'm sorry about your dad."
She reaches out to squeeze his hand. "Thanks...I'm sorry about your mom."
He sits down cross-legged beside her. "So you going to Whittfield now?" He says it like this is normal. Like life can ever be normal for them.
Bonnie scoffs, she never even wanted to go to Whittfield. She was going to go to Duke like her dad.
"No, I'm taking a little trip."
Tyler's brow raises slightly, "what kind of trip."
Bonnie could lie but she trusts Tyler for some reason. They've had secrets before, she's sure if he can't keep this one, she'll be long gone and it won't matter if he can't keep it. She'll do what it takes to hide her location. This has to be a fresh start.
"The whole part of my being alive thing is that I promised to leave and not come back."
"Wh-"
"Tyler. I need to do this. I won't ever be able to enjoy my life here. Bad things happen when I'm here...I keep dying. This is my last chance at a do-over." Bonnie dusts off her pants as she stands.
"So I guess this is a goodbye," she says mouth lifting at the side. She reaches out a hand to help him up.
Tyler's silent for a moment just watching her face.
"It doesn't have to be."
That's how they end up in the smoky hotel room with Bonnie drooling on the pillow beside him. The sun is creeping through the blinds and he'll get up soon to draw the curtains, but this is good. They're so close that he can feel the warmth of her breath on his face. She's relaxed in the way that only humans can be. This could be the new beginning he's waited for.