Title: Just Tell Me What You Want
Rating: This chapter is probably only PG-13ish. There's slight language and slight sexual content.
Disclaimer: None of these characters are mine. I can't claim them. They are all property of the hard-working folks who are involved in the show South Of Nowhere. (Okay, I own Neil and Brock, but they aren't in this chapter anyway. They live at the bowling alley, only. Also, Nikki, is not part of the cast of S.O.N. She's there for Aiden's sake.
Feedback: I really want to thank everyone who sends it (and I apologize if it takes me a while to reply to anyone who has asked questions in her/his review; it takes me a while to reply to those sometimes, sorry if it does.) I would love to get some feedback for this chapter too.
Summary: This will be a Spencer/Ashley story. It will involve the other characters of South of Nowhere though too.
Author's Notes: Here's the next section of my story (obviously). This is as everything between Spencer and Ashley build up to a climax. Just how much can a girl really handle? Enjoy.
Spencer looked at her friend begrudgingly. Too late. Ashley had asked her if it was too late. "Too late for what?" The blonde looked at the other girl for a moment, blinking back the still emerging tears. She would get through this without shedding any more tears. She refused to cry again for Ashley.
"For us to be together!" Ashley shouted incredulously. She knew that Spencer knew what she had been talking about originally; it wasn't that hard to figure out.
Spencer just looked at the brunette sadly. Ashley loved Spencer, so she decided to make-out with her ex-boyfriend. That screwed with Spencer's mind, and she didn't like it. Okay, so Spencer had also over-reacted when Ashley had not been allowed into her house to see her; so, they never got to have their talk about whether or not they were dating. That's another thing; Mrs. Carlin hated Ashley. So, Ashley would have to be willing to work hard to get her to accept her as Spencer's friend, let alone when they decided to come out to her. Spencer wasn't sure if Ashley was willing to do that.
"Ashley, you went and made-out with Aiden because you thought that I was going to be with Kelly." Spencer looked at the other girl, and pushed her straight blonde hair back behind her ears. If she was going to cry, she refused to let it get in her hair. Actually, no. She still refused to cry. Not again. Not over her.
"Well, you were!" Ashley looked at the blonde. Luckily, the girl's locker rooms were pretty solid, because she was getting pretty loud. The locker rooms had to be pretty solid because every sports team seemed to like to blast music before they went out to play. It was supposed to pump them up for the game, or something like that. Ashley wasn't completely sure.
"Not until after I talked to you, and Aiden made it pretty clear that you two were going to be together." Spencer smirked as she talked to the girl. She was definitely right on this part, and she wasn't wavering.
"But," Ashley began before getting interrupted.
"No, Ashley. There's no excuses for this. You screwed up. You went and had to try to be with your ex-boyfriend because you thought that I was going to be with someone else. You didn't trust me." It was simple. There had to be trust between the two girls, and if Ashley didn't have it for Spencer…Well, it wasn't going to work. Just like Spencer's idea of not crying wasn't going to work. There was already a tear working it's way down her cheek that she swiped at before Ashley noticed.
"You didn't believe me that I had gone to visit you that day; you listened to your mom." Ashley was too focused on keeping her own tears back to notice the blonde's lone tear, and soon a similar one flowed down Ashley's face. She didn't bother to swipe at it this time though. If she let it go, perhaps more wouldn't follow.
"You were the only thing that I really did believe in." Spencer let her honesty show through in her voice, and Ashley opened her mouth to speak a few times before her jaws and vocal cords seemed to work together in alliance.
"Did? Past tense?" There, Ashley blinked back a few more tears.
"You didn't even realize how much I meant to you until Aiden wanted to talk to you about me, did you? That's what he wanted to talk to you about isn't it, when I saw you two talking? About me. He knew how you felt about me before you did." Spencer shook her head. Ashley just didn't understand. She wasn't cut out for this relationship stuff.
"I knew before he did! I was the one who wanted to talk to you at the club, when you were all over Kelly." Ashley reminded Spencer of the first night that they kissed on the beach.
"That was the day that you were all over Glen!" Oh, and Spencer seemed to remember the day just as well.
"And you were all over Aiden!" That was before their kiss, but it was still part of the day that they were reminiscing about. Some moments of the day were fond, and some were sore spots for either and both girls.
"Guess that's changed now, huh? You're the one all over Aiden." Spencer flashed them back up to reality, and the more recent happenings between the two girls and their other admirers.
"We're not going to dive back into that mess. We cleared that up that night." Ashley shook her head, pushing her point that they were to not delve back into those ideas, those thoughts.
"Fine," Spencer stated simply, blinking stupidly at the white wall in front of her. She had turned away from Ashley because she wasn't sure what else to say. She wasn't sure how else to try to figure out if Ashley was serious this time; if Ashley was ready for a relationship.
"Yeah, well, what about now, Spencer? Do you still have more questions, more comments to sling at me without taking any of the blame for yourself? You were kissing Kelly, Spence. I wasn't the only one trying to disappear and sink into someone else." Ashley apparently had her own problems with what Spencer had done.
"I never said that you were the only one! I admit it. I tried to be with Kelly. It didn't work okay. Is that what you wanted to hear? That when I fell asleep with Kelly at my place, the whole night I dreamed about you even though I had her sleeping next to me. Is that what you wanted to hear, Ashley?" Spencer's eyes were red-rimmed again, and the tears had started creeping silently down her cheeks.
"You did?" Ashley looked flabbergasted for a moment as she stared at the blonde.
"No, I just made that all up." Spencer had a bitter and obviously sarcastic tone to her voice. The biting edge of it made Ashley flinch mentally and physically.
"Spence, come on. I didn't mean it like that; you know it. I told Aiden that I wasn't into him. He was just a distraction. He was my re-bound girl, and that's pathetic. He's not a very good looking girl, and he's already chasing some other girl anyway. I love you, and I don't want to screw this up anymore. I want this to be right for once." Ashley looked at the other girl pleadingly. She chose to take that moment to wipe a few stray tears from the blonde's cheek. In return, the blonde turned to face her again.
"Is she a cheerleader?" Out of everything that Ashley had said, Spencer picked up on the notion of Aiden finding something else. After Ashley checked Spencer's face for any signs of joking or comedic sense that might lay in the question; she shrugged, smiling, before choosing to answer.
"Um, I don't think so actually. She doesn't look like the type though. She'd push Madison's buttons too much." She looked at Spencer's face again, trying to read Spencer's mind.
"Like you?" Spencer smiled, the harsh tone gone. She was obviously trying to be light-hearted again, and Ashley was suddenly grateful for her odd sense of humor.
"Yeah, like me." Ashley paused for a moment, thinking. "Though, you've gotten pretty good at it lately too."
"Yeah…I have, haven't I?" She smiled thinking of her own sense of wit, before continuing. "She just has to date my brother…" She frowned, and held in the silent snarl that wanted to be let out. Spencer really didn't like Madison's idiotic and pointless comments and crude gestures towards Ashley and herself when they were together somewhere. Yet, this was the girl that made Glen happy. Glen sure had a weird personality taste in girls, but to each their own.
"Spence, as much as I like to talk about Madison. No, wait. I don't like to talk about Madison; scratch that. Does that mean that we're…" Ashley looked thoughtful again for a moment, and it was obvious to Spencer that another question was looming. This one was probably going to be deeper, and Spencer might have to think about it before answering. But, Ashley was willing to give her as long as needed to answer, or she was willing to give her until the girls for the next gym class began wandering in to change. They still had a few minutes. "Is it too late," she turned to look at Spencer's reaction before continuing, "…for us to be together?"
The blonde looked at the brunette for a moment, stunned. She didn't have to think too hard on this question after all. She knew her answer and her feelings. "Damn it, Ashley. Can't you see that we're already together? Right now. Right here."
"But I mean," Ashley was afraid that Spencer was taking the too-literal approach again.
"You know exactly what I mean, and it's not literally. I know that you want the truth right now, and you want answers. This is your answer. This is the truth." With that, Spencer let herself live in the moment; she let herself do what she had been wanting to do this whole conversation, as the feelings built up inside each girl. Spencer kissed Ashley with all the feeling she had in her lithe little body. All feelings had to reach a climax, and this was a damned good one.
Ashley took the opportunity to kiss Spencer back. At first, the kiss was soft, soothing, but it soon turned into a deeper kiss, and Ashley braced her left arm against the locker room wall, and her right was cradling Spencer's neck. Both of Spencer's arms had slipped around Ashley's waist, as both girls let themselves go into the kiss for a few minutes longer. "Can we just go on from here?" Spencer managed to mutter once the kiss had ended, and both girls tried to catch their breath.
"We can go on from here." Ashley agreed, grinning back at the other girl, as her forehead pressed against the blonde's. They'd have to deal with other people, like Madison, soon, but right now, they were more concerned with each other. Of course, before they even had to deal with Madison, they had to be willing to leave each other to go to their next classes before the next group of girls sauntered in innocently for gym class.