Crash
Author- Emily-Grace Mendes (Brookebynature)
Disclaimer- I don't own any of the characters featured in this post (except the officers I guess) or thesong. Hell, I don't even really own the plotline.
A/N- Once again, I'd like to thank you for the suber reviews you guys have given me, please keep them coming. The song featured in the last post, was 'Maybe Tomorrow' by The Stereophonics.
I hope you enjoy this post, and please REVIEW! xxx
Crash
"Many people die with their music still in them. Too often, it is because they are always getting ready to live. Before they know it, time runs out"
Peyton's hand lingered over the handle of the bathroom cabinet. She knew what she was doing, she knew fine well what was in that cabinet. Giving herself a disgusted look in the mirror, she turned away, her back against the cold, hard sink. She'd been at low points before, but never like this. It was sad, she thought, how she had lost so many people in her life. But the main loss, the one person she'd ever really loved, and who'd loved her back was someone who was only a phone call, email, bus ride away. And she was too scared to do anything about it.
She still had the painting of Jake and Jenny in her room. She looked at it every night before she tried to go to sleep, and every morning when she contemplated getting up. It had been six, almost seven years now, since she had last seen them. Jenny would be in school, and she'd have friends. Jake wouldn't be in fear of Nicki coming back to take Jenny, because if there was any justice in the world, any real fairness, Jake would have full custody of his daughter.
She turned towards the mirror once again, her hand reaching straight for the razor blade inside the cabinet. She wasn't strong enough to take control of her own life, or so she thought. Sad really, that ending her feelings beat making them better. Still, it was her life, who was there to tell her what to do?
Digging the edge of the blade into her pale skin, Peyton let out a stifled cry for help, an admission of her feelings. Her blue eyes brimmed with tears which threatened to fall any moment, cascading down her face in a salty waterfall. But yet she smiled. She smiled at the realisation that she couldn't go on like this, and that she actually could do something to help herself.
She knew Jake was in Savannah. She had a car. Put the two together, and there was an equation she could solve. Peyton quickly wiped at her face with the back of her hand before rinsing the blue flannel with warm water and putting it over the stinging line of red.
"Sir could you step back please" the officer said, motioning his partner over for support.
"How long will I be stuck here?" Lucas demanded, the angry expression that was worn almost daily on his face had returned.
"As long as it takes for this to be investigated" he replied sternly. "Now can you please get back into your vehicle"
It was more of an order than a question. The officer looked at Lucas, wondering whether it was just going to be another of those nights where selfish people didn't want to cooperate.
"Why the hell are they called emergency services if it's taking this long?" Lucas shouted at the officers. "I mean, they have the word emergency in them, so……"
Lucas was cut off by the officer.
"Sir, we understand that you want to get home, they all do" he motioned to the traffic "hell, I do! But it doesn't always go our way. So please get back in your vehicle"
"Selfish people" one officer muttered to the other as they watched Lucas walk back towards his car.
Jake walked through the bright white doors that led to the emergency room. The whole hospital was in chaos after learning that there had been a major accident on the highway, and that all of the surviving injured people would be brought there.
Stopping at the sink the wash his hands with antibacterial hand wash, Jake thought back to Jenny at home. He hated leaving her with a babysitter, especially at Christmas, yet the only way for them to have a shot at a decent life, was for him to work ungodly hours as an assistant at Tree Hill General Hospital.
"Jagelski hurry up" the doctor barked at him, snapping Jake out of his thoughts.
"Coming" he muttered, looking up at the clock. Only eleven more hours to go.
Peyton pushed the play button on the c.d player, letting the music blast out over the speakers. She smiled at herself in the mirror, unashamed about what she had just done in the bathroom. It wasn't shameful, it was something which led her to where she was now, where she was going. She was going to be happy.
The highway was busier than usual, the lights a yellow blur on the black horizon, something which Peyton found beautiful in its own right. Scenery was beautiful if you just took the time to look at it.
The white strip on her hand was starting to feel tight, and Peyton loosened it, unwrapping the bandage as she saw that it wasn't needed any more. Taking her eyes off the road for just a second, Peyton threw the bandage on the floor.
She never looked up.
"Can we get some music on man?" the officer laughed, rubbing his arms with his gloved hands. " It's so Goddamn cold and we could use something to fill the air"
"You're getting sentimental you know" the other officer laughed as h turned the radio down low.
"Nah" he shook it off. "Just don't like the quiet."
We text as we eat, as we listen to the freaks
As we wait for the right of way
The officers laughed at the lyrics coming over the speakers. They could have at least done with something Christmassy to cheer them up.
We text as we talk, we're running as we walk
Cos we surf our little souls away
We smoke as we choke, as we sink another coke
And we grin when it blows our mind
We skate as we date, as we slowly suffocate
We're running, we're running, we're running out of time……
In life, we count down time. We count every day, every hour, every minute, even every second until whatever we're looking forward to, comes to us. But we're counting away our life. Precious time that we won't get back.
Often, we think a song is just a song. We sing along to the words, but we don't take them in. But maybe if we looked closer, thought about the person who made up the lyrics, we would see why we do what we do, what matters to us, and what we want.
Life is about living. So why can't we just do that? We can't we stop asking the questions, and searching for the answers, to just live?
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