Disclaimer: Serialhugger, doesn't own Naruto or any trademarks related there of, also we don't own any other trademarks you may recognize. Since Smurf is a serialhugger, she wants you all to know that she doesn't own them either… but she would really, really like to own Kankuro.
Dedication: This chapter is for no one, as it is completely stupid and useless.
Note: This isn't a real chapter! It is mindless filler, and pure idiocy, and I'm sorry that I ever submitted to my muses long enough to create such an atrocity.
Chapter 3: In Which There Is No Point… And For That I Apologize
It had come to the attention of the citizenry of Konoha that Mary-Sue was not an equal opportunity character. She disregarded all non-ninjas, which wasn't fair, and she also avoided an entire group of cannon characters that were, in fact, ninjas. These characters were deeply disappointed, and more than a little hurt that no author had felt the need to let a Mary-Sue loose on them.
It just wasn't fair!
They were all perfectly valid characters, involved in the tapestry of storytelling that created Kishimoto-sama's Naruto-verse. They deserved recognition! Damn it, they deserved to get Mary-Sued-even if it was just once in their existence.
But how would they achieve that goal?
Well, first things first, they needed to organize. That was easy enough; they would use the staff room at the Konoha Ninja Academy to hold meetings, thusly forming a support group for those characters that couldn't seem to rate even the poorest excuse of a Mary-Sue attempt. Simple.
Then they would need a leader… but whom? Who would be the perfect man for the job? Again, that problem was quite easily solved. The answer was practically doing a naked hula right in front of their noses, while singing Yankee Doodle, and balancing a book on its metaphorical head.
There was only one shinobi in Konoha qualified to lead their little group. Ebisu! Yes, Ebisu; it was almost as if he had been tailor made for the job. As Rodney Dangerfield might have observed in one of his stand up routines- he never got any respect.
A schedule was made up, after everyone agreeing that they would meet every third Thursday of the month, and the C.C.F.A.E.O.M.S.F. (Cannon Characters For An Equal Opportunity Mary Sue Fandom) was formed.
Now all they had to do was worm their way into the minds of the various writers in the fandom, and take control of their subconscious, thusly forcing the poor authors to create works of fiction in which they could become thoroughly Mary-Sued.
Hey, it could happen.
Here ends Chapter Three.
Don't hit me; I bruise easy... and I said I was sorry!