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Summary: A piece of crack fiction, which sequels From the Floppy Called Subversive, and prequels An End To The Subversive Floppy's. Includes several staples of bad fiction. This is a parody, and as such it makes fun of fandom quirks, like Mary-Sue's.
Mary-Sue Barbeque
The thing about Itachi was, he wasn't a wasteful person. And so, now that he had a dead Mary-Sue of the Uchiha (or so she had said) variety on his hands, he had to do something with the body. He could have buried it, true, but he hadn't taken the time out to burry any of his other relatives, so why bother giving her special treatment?
He could burn her body… but she was already crispy, and what was the fun in reburning something- or someone- that was already burnt beyond recognition?
Then a thought struck him. He was a member of Akatsuki. Akatsuki had many other members, members like Zetsu, who ate people. It was perfect. He'd just go and make up a few other dishes for the non-people-eating nin's, and they could have a barbeque. It had been a while since he had last experienced one of those.
Some hours later, after all was said and done, the food was eaten, and the sun was hanging low in the sky, Zetsu turned to the Uchiha, and said, "You know, Mary-Sue's taste an awful lot like poplar bark," before turning to look at Tobi, who was asking him some question or other.
But, exactly when, why, and how Zetsu had become an expert on the taste of bark is a story for another day, and to tell the truth, Itachi, who was not a wasteful person, didn't really care to waste his time hearing it.
Yeah, I am fully aware that this fic is nowhere near my usual personal standards. But as I said, this is a trilogy so just bare with me, and I promise to make the next one better.
Hugs and Oreos.