Part 1: Left Behind
Predictably, Teal'c was the first to leave.
Less than two weeks after they returned from Jack's cabin, Teal'c packed a small bundle of his belongings and departed for Dakara and his new position on the Council of the Free Jaffa Nation. It was a moment of little fanfare, but deeply meaningful nonetheless.
The original SG-1 stood together in the gate room one last time, quietly reflecting on the first time they had stood as a team on the ramp eight years previously when they had all stumbled upon a seemingly hopeless battle. But here they all stood, improbably victorious and all more whole than not, even after years of hardships, loss and setbacks. They had actually achieved what they had set out to do.
A heady moment, indeed.
Though there was sadness at Teal'c's permanent exodus from Earth, they all knew they could still see him and to be honest, nothing had really been the same since Jack had been promoted anyway. It just finally seemed like time for them to stop holding on so tightly to the ghost of SG-1.
Not that it made letting go any easier.
As Teal'c bowed one final time at them before stepping into the waiting wormhole, none of them had any reason to be anything other than optimistic about a future that had finally come.
Little did they know that his would just be the first of many departures.
They disclosed the existence of the Stargate on a Tuesday. By Thursday Jack was already tired of seeing his face on TV. He thought it was good thing that none of them had lives to begin with, because this was just going to make everything more difficult. Sam was convinced that the media would get tired of them eventually and Daniel seemed charmingly unaware that the scrutiny even existed.
Even Jack could have learned to accept it as the price for a new era for Earth.
But then the fighting had started. First it had been nothing more than nit-picking over who got to sit where at the Stargate talks being held, of all places, in Zurich, Switzerland. It had escalated quickly from there. It seemed that a lot of nations had a big problem with being lied to for so long. Mumbles of 'American Imperialism' and conspiracy could be heard everywhere.
Jack did his best to ignore it all, never having been a fan of politics to begin with, though the urge to just bang all their heads together did crop up occasionally. But as long as they left the SGC alone, he could handle the bickering.
Six months after disclosure, though, the talks stalled and America was threatening to pull out all together. After all, they were just doing everyone a favor letting them know in the first place. They didn't owe anyone anything.
Jack did his best to ignore it and the growing unease he felt in his gut.
But then one day Daniel was standing in front of his desk, telling him that he was leaving the SGC.
"I can help," he said. "I know I can."
Jack didn't want to let him go. And not just because he was a valuable asset to the program or that he had, once again, just come back from a brush with death. But Daniel had come to his office with a face already lined with concern and just said 'Please.' Daniel could never stand by and watch suffering, especially when he was convinced that there was a way he could stop it.
How could Jack say no to that?
He felt his head nod in acceptance, even as his stomach began to ache.
Daniel's apartment was carefully packed up. Out of the corner of his eye Jack watched Sam lovingly bundle up the soft leather bound journals that were a tangible reminder of SG-1's adventures together. He wondered if she was thinking about all the times they had done this after Daniel's deaths.
Jack knew that Daniel was just moving on, not dying, but it still felt like it.
The dusty tweed suits and worn flannels that Jack carefully piled into a box reminded him of a floppy haired archeologist who had once imparted a great truth to him in a sandy, dark cave halfway across the galaxy.
Life itself was more than enough reason to live.
He sealed the box with a strip of tape and while no one was looking, he slipped a pack of Kleenex into Daniel's pocket.
Jack stood with Sam in the airport and waved one last time, trying not to think of his relief that he at least he still had her.
The talks resumed, with Daniel now in attendance, using his new found fame as best he could, trying to be the voice of reason. Jack had seen him talk his way out of a million different situations, but his own race seemed to be more suspicious of him than the average alien. It was hard for Jack to comprehend.
But Daniel was never one to give up.
Somewhere along the line, though, it had become about more than an alien metal circle hidden deep under a mountain in Colorado (not that anyone knew the actual location of the famed gate). It was if every grievance ever felt by any group of people had been brought back to the surface and the Stargate was the catalyst.
Everything escalated so quickly, however, that one day Daniel was mediating talks and the next Jack was watching with complete surprise as American embassies all over the world were evacuated and American borders were closed. He could no longer ignore the gathering storm.
Soon after, Jack began to have transfer papers fly over his desk like there was no tomorrow. He had called anyone and everyone that would talk to him, demanding to know what the hell they thought they were doing transferring his highly trained officers away from the SGC and into front line units throughout the world.
He had been told in no uncertain terms that the defense of American sanctity was the top priority. Interstellar exploration was a luxury that the U.S. government could no longer afford. It had taken the President threatening to relieve Jack of his command to get him to finally accept defeat, though for a moment Jack had let himself wonder why exactly that would be a bad thing. What was he really doing here anymore anyway?
But Jack couldn't leave.
So for four months he helplessly watched the growing conflict and increasing political pressure on the President gradually bleed the SGC dry. He was only allowed to keep four teams for retrieval of off-world elements, primarily naquadah.
Then the unthinkable had happened. No one could ever point to a specific event, but one day Jack had woken to a speech by President Hayes declaring war against those who threatened American self-determination and safety. The lines were drawn. In reality it was nothing more than a few border skirmishes here and there with very few casualties, but Jack knew it wouldn't take much to escalate.
It seemed that World War Three had begun. Hadn't they once called World War One the 'war to end all wars'? A bit premature in the end it seemed. Humans just never learned their lessons.
Jack couldn't help but think that if Anubis was still alive, he would be laughing his half-ascended ass off.
But it was not until nearly three months since the advent of war that Jack received the transfer papers that finally brought home just how real this war was.
He didn't call her into his office, instead he found himself wandering down to her lab. Pausing in her open doorway, he stood for long moments watching her work, leaning over some diagnostic tool with her brow furrowed in concentration. The unguarded moment did not last long, however, because like some sixth sense she realized he was watching her and glanced up from her tools.
"Sir," she said somewhat breathlessly as she turned off the machine she had been working on. Her pleasure at seeing him faded somewhat quickly, however, as she took in his grim visage and the folder clenched rather menacingly in his fist. Her bright smile of greeting slipped off her face and she sank down rather gracelessly into a nearby chair, obviously having already worked out the purpose of this little visit.
Jack took a few steps into the room. "I'm sorry, Carter. I did everything I could think of, even threatened to resign…but that doesn't seem to have the clout it once did."
She tried to force an unconcerned smile on her face. "I'm sure you did everything you could, sir, and I appreciate it, but we both knew this would happen eventually."
He watched with an aching sense of loss as she began to hide behind her good soldier façade. These last few months nothing had overtly changed between them, but they were just both far too aware of the fact that they were all the other had left. It had inevitably led to a greater openness between them, but here she was, shutting back down again. Shielding herself.
For once, he almost wished for her to get pissed and chuck something at a wall. Or at least looked like she cared that she was leaving. "You don't have to pretend that this doesn't suck, Carter."
Her lips twitched and for a moment Jack was almost convinced he had seen a flash of panic and sadness, but then she dropped her head and began playing absently with some tool Jack couldn't identify.
"When?" she asked softly after long moments of silence.
Jack sighed. "Immediately." Things moved quickly these days and these would be Carter's final hours in this lab.
Sam nodded her understanding. "Where?"
Here was the real kicker. Jack handed her the folder, waiting until she looked back up at him to answer. "I don't know," he said. "Apparently I don't have high enough clearance."
Her mouth popped open for a moment at the paradoxical statement before she slammed it back shut and reached for the folder, her fingers briefly tangling with his.
Hers wasn't the first departure, but Jack felt like it was the last fatal slamming door.
And still he stayed.
He drove her to the airport. She made him swear to water her plants and drive her car every once and a while so the battery wouldn't die. She promised to send for her stuff when she finally got settled at her final destination. Jack knew she never would.
They stood silently in line as she checked her bags. Twenty minutes later they were standing in front of the security check point. She was shuffling uncomfortably from foot to foot, undoubtedly searching for something to say. Jack didn't make it any easier for her.
"If you see Teal'c or Daniel, say goodbye for me," she finally managed to say. There had been no time to contact either of them. "And tell them not to worry about me."
Jack knew this last bit was more for his benefit than theirs. He let a cynical smirk cross his face for just a moment, realizing that she was more concerned about leaving him behind than her new mysterious posting. "They know you can take care of yourself," he said, playing along.
She nodded briefly once, looking for all the world like she didn't have a clue what to do next. So she simply said, "I'll keep in touch," even when they both knew that it was going to be nearly impossible for her to do so.
"You do that," Jack replied, not sure how to make this easier.
Still they stood several feet apart, until Sam finally seemed to concede defeat. "Goodbye, sir," she said.
Jack refused to wince at the formal farewell, instead trying to focus on being immensely glad that she hadn't said anything about it having been an honor to serve with him or some crap. "Bye, Carter," he said instead, trying, rather unsuccessfully, to imbue the simple words with…something.
In the next instant she was walking away, joining the ranks of people pulling out laptops and removing shoes in the long security checkpoint. He watched her golden head until it was no longer visible before shoving his hands in his pockets and heading back out to the entrance. He didn't make it much further than around the corner, though, before he found himself standing still in the middle of the hall, staring at his toes.
The familiar urge to just do something began to build in him, but his feet would not move from the spot where he stood. Suddenly he was the one standing still while everything and everyone spiraled away from him, leaving him behind. He was just about to force himself do something, undoubtedly something rash, when he heard his name called out behind him.
"Jack."
He barely had time to register the sound of her voice before he broke his immobility and turned around to see her walking briskly towards him. And then her arms were wrapping around him and after only the briefest hesitation born out of habit he did the same.
It was nice to hold her for no other reason than that he just wanted to, and not because one of them had almost died and they felt they deserved a moment of weakness. This was something else entirely. He forced himself to relax and remember that it was okay for him to touch her now. He was allowed to do this, allowed to feel and touch and want. Even though it meant she was going away.
But all his mind could focus on was that fact that he no longer had any control. He had no say in her career or her safety. He couldn't be there to make sure she had the back up she needed. He wouldn't be there and he didn't even have the clearance to know where 'there' was. It scared the hell out of him.
He shook the disturbing thoughts off, reminding himself that Carter was more than capable of taking care of herself, forcibly refocusing his mind on the feel of her in his arms, knowing that this was the closest either of them would get to saying, 'I'll miss you.' Or to speaking of the inevitable appearance of yet another barrier between them and their vague hopes for 'something.'
"I'll be here when you get back," he said. And that was the closest he would get to saying that he would wait as long as it took, that he still hoped. But she understood. He knew she did.
When she finally pulled out of his arms, he watched her walk away and bit down mercilessly on the horrible feeling that he was never going to see her again.
He drove to her house and talked to her plants, knowing she would appreciate it.
The next day, he went to work, sat behind his desk and tried to carry on.