Pissed Problems
"I can't see! I can't see! Harry, I'm blind!"
"No you aren't."
"I swear I am! All I see is black..."
"That's because your eyes are closed. Open them."
"Oh. OH! Wow...I can see now. You are such a genius Henry."
"My name is Harry, and I'm not a genius. You're just mind-blowingly pissed."
"No I'm not, Harold. I'm completely sob..."
"Er...you just got sick on my shoes."
"So I did. Sorry."
"No you're not."
"You're right. I'm entirely too pissed to feel emotion."
"I'm sure."
"Hey Herb..."
"My name is Harry."
"I know that. I'm pretty drunk right now, but I'm pretty sure I'm pleased to meet you."
"You've met me before."
"I have? Oh, I have. Well...I have a wonderful idea."
"What does this idea entail?"
"Well...my boyfriend had plans tonight, and I was wondering if you would like to come back to my flat with me?"
"I'm going to your flat anyway."
"Really! That's where I'm going!"
"I'm shocked. Draco, I'm Harry. I'm your boyfriend."
"Oh. Awkward."
"No it's not."
"I know. I'm too pissed to feel emotion."
"You just said that."
"I did?"
"Yes."
"Oh. I'm sorry."
"No you're not."
"I know. I'm too..."
"Stop."
"Okay."
"Let's get you home, you can barely stand."
"Yes I can, silly. Look..."
"You aren't standing. You're lying down on the street."
"I know. Isn't it lovely? I think I'll just stay here."
"Not unless you want to get flattened by a double-decker. Come on."
"No. I's tired..."
"Draco, you're hair is getting ruined."
"Alright then. Let's go. Will you carry me?"
"Of course not."
"Ah well, worth a try."
"Draco, there isn't any music, stop dancing."
"I want to dance. I'm a dancing crazy man."
"Yes. Yes you are."
End