A/n: Do not own. X's are line breaks, italics are silent conversations. As always, use your words.
-x-
"You two are so domestic."
Severus snorted, not bothering to glance up from the inventory list he was going over. "Says the woman who used to make her own robes."
"Will you sit still, Alexis?" Remus growled, gently easing a comb through the worst of the tangles. The nutrition potion was making her hair stronger, it was no longer coming out in clumps which meant he could curl it again. If the woman would sit still long enough for him to get the rollers in.
S
he huffed, picking up another piece of parchment from the table. They were in Remus and Severus' quarters, in the kitchen. Every time she tried to curl her hair it became a helpless tangle of knots. Since she was avoiding Eric, she had snapped at him the day before, Remus was the only other person she trusted to do her hair. It was finally strong enough to hold curls again. "You know Remus, perhaps before school starts back we can set up a salon for the campers." She suggested, eyes scanning the sheet of parchment before placing it back on the table and picking up another one.
He had actually thought about that. "I had a similar idea, actually. If I can get some help, we could easily make sure every one of them felt confident going back to school. I'll have to make up a schedule for it, though. Several of the kids really need hair cuts, so I could try to find some time this week." After he did Karrie and Damien's hair, of course. Eric had asked him if he would be willing to do Damien's hair. Because while his dad could easily do most hair styles, the child wanted dreads and Eric had enough trouble doing that to his own hair, let alone anyone elses.
"I'm sure some of the counselors might be able to help and Eric, if he has time. Just don't ask Tim."
He snorted, rolling another strand of black hair and pinning it in place. "Please. I don't trust Tim with a comb. I wouldn't give him scissors."
Severus shook his head, glancing up at the two. "He can't be that bad." The twin looks he got was enough to tell him that Tim might really be as bad as these two have told him.
"Yeah, no. The last time Tim did my hair, Eric ended up having to cut it to a bob. A bob! And my hair had been down to my lower back." Alexis scoffed, shaking her head. She winced suddenly, feeling the curlers pull.
"If you keep moving your head, the curls won't set right." Remus scolded, frowning slightly. "Dad doesn't even let Tim do his own hair anymore. I remember when I was almost seventeen, one summer, and Tim had tried to cut his own hair. It was a disaster that took Eric nearly two hours to fix. He threaten to shave Tim's head the next time."
"Everyone had something they can't do well. You aren't the best at sewing, hair is not my specialty, and Alexis can't talk to girls." He commented , smirking at his sister when she glared at him.
"I can talk to girls just fine, thanks." She growled, pulling slightly. She grimaced at the smack to her shoulder.
"Sit still." Remus sighed, undoing and re-rolling that strand of hair. Didn't she realize that the more she moved, the longer it would take? Every time he did her hair, she fidgeted. He glanced at the parchment she was reading, raising an eyebrow. "You know this is suppose to be a relaxing, right?"
She snorted, keeping her head still as her eyes ran over the parchment again. "Unfortunately, that's not really in my schedule right now." She always had some sort of work she had to do, there wasn't any real downtime in running a school.
"Why did we order twenty kilos of dried kidney beans?" Severus inquired, frowning down at the list in his hands. It wasn't even in the food section of the inventory, which the elves ordered the food, but in the section for camp supplies.
"Charity."
He grimaced, shaking his head. That woman and her crafts. He should have known, really. "What a waste of food." He grumbled, making a quick note next to that line.
" I know." She sighed softly, catching his eyes for a moment before picking up the next sheet of parchment. She had a feeling Remus would be done with her hair before she was done with this small mountain of paperwork.
"Speaking of girls and your inability to talk to them, are the curls to impress someone?" Severus teased, grimacing as a hex hit him.
"Alexis." Remus scolded, casting a quick finite on his husband who was fighting the tickling hex. Only Severus would fight against a tickling hex. "Don't tease, Sev, or I'll do your hair next. It could use a deep conditioning." He threaten, eyeing the younger man's hair even as he continued to roll black strands. His partner's hair really did need to be trimmed and deep conditioned. The fight was getting Severus to let him do that, though.
-x-
Jake sighed softly, watching the twins wrestle. As much as he probably should separate them, he did realize that they were just playing. "Watch the furnishings, Milo." He cautioned as the teen rolled too close to an end table. At least the twin fourteen year-olds were no longer fighting.
"Wrap your leg around his, Marko, and use your arms to leverage him over." Michael instructed, eyeing the sloppy technique of the younger teens. What they needed was some mats and an open floor space. He had noted several of the other boys and some of the girls watching the twins with interested. Maybe he could convince Jake to let them practice wrestling in the work out room used by the quidditch teams. If everyone who was interested learned the correct moves and proper technique, they could have a wrestling tournament.
Marko grimaced, trying to wrap his leg around his brother's and failing miserably. He had never been good at wrestling, neither was Milo honestly. They just liked to play. He never did manage to win, though, which was a bit annoying. He tried to toss Milo off of him, finally stopping his movements in defeat.
"It was a good attempt, anyway." Daniel commented quietly, catching Michael's eyes.
"You wrestle?"
"At the community center whenever I could escape." He shrugged, eyes landing back on the twins as Milo sat on Marko's stomach, tickling the other boy.
"That's a really-" He broke off, sighing when Marko kicked Milo off of him with a shriek and into the table they were too close to. "Bad idea." He muttered, shaking his head. He glanced toward Jake, who had quickly moved to the twins, before looking back at Michael. "No chance in hell he'll go for any of us wrestling now, is there?"
Michael grimaced, shaking his head. "We both wrestled before, so maybe he'd let us teach whoever wants to the safe method of wrestling. It's very good as a stress release." But he knew that if one of the twins had gotten hurt playing, the adults might put a stop to it all together. Sometimes their counselors were a little over-protective, but it did feel nice that someone cared that much.
Did they think he was deaf? He quickly checked both twins out, feeling the small knot forming on the back of Milo's head. "Just take it easy for the rest of the day, alright Milo?" He ordered quietly. It didn't seem like the child had a concussion but he would keep an eye on it. "And there is a chance in hell, Daniel. Just not in the lounge. We'd have to find a spot with proper equipment and no furniture. If you both feel up to sharing techniques, I'm sure there are some of the boys and girls who would like to try it. So we will set something up." He added, looking toward the two teenagers. He wasn't surprised that both boys had learned to wrestle as a way to escape. He was even sure that one of the girls who had been watching also knew how to wrestle. If these kids wanted to try properly wrestling as a way of blowing off steam and as a new activity, it wouldn't hurt to try it. He would talk to Alexis about finding space for it.
Michael shared a long glance with Daniel, waiting until the other boy nodded. "We're up for it." It would be a good activity. They could only play football and quidditch so much, after all.
-x-
"You look tired." Charlie commented, frowning slightly at the woman.
Kate snorted, shaking her head. "I'm exhausted. Without Ariana, I can't keep up with where Karrie is at all times and I finally gave in and passed Lila to Jake. Rani and I will make it work. We have to." She responded, eyes finding the girl sitting under a tree with her two friends. Karrie wasn't in as much of a running mood today, thankfully, but she did still have those moments. It had been a long couple of days.
He glanced around for a moment, spotting each of his boys, before turning his eyes back to Kate. "Sometimes we just have to let them run." He caught sight of two of the youngest of his boys scrambling up a tree.
Easy for you to say. Harry doesn't run as often as he did anymore and your other runner stopped completely." She retorted, eyes searching for the rest of her girls for a moment before following Charlie's to a tree. "What are they doing?" The two preteen boys had stopped about half way up the tree and one of them was slowly testing his weight on a larger branch. She frowned, tilting her head slightly. It looked like the boy had on a healer's robe, which meant it could only be one preteen.
He sighed softly, moving quickly toward the tree. He had an idea of what the two preteens were up to and he wanted to be close enough that he could catch them if necessary. "Boys?" He called calmly, stopping a few feet from the tree. Of the two eleven year-olds, only one of them showed no fear.
"Damien, what are you and Ben doing up there?"
"We're going to fly!" Damien grinned, taking another careful step onto the wider tree branch. They were just high enough up that falling might hurt a bit. But he wasn't going to fall. He had talked Ben into trying this, even though the other boy had kept muttering that he didn't really like heights. That was one reason they hadn't gone further up, because Ben had frozen about halfway up the trunk.
"You're going to do what?" He blinked, hoping to the gods that the kid didn't mean what he thought he did, that this was just another one of those make-believe games of the mundane-born.
He giggled, taking another few steps until he was clear of all the other tree branches. "Fly!" He had done it before but never on purpose. He figured if he just concentrated really hard he could do it.
"Why don't the two of you come down from there? I don't mind you climbing trees, but you are a little too high up." Charlie responded calmly, locking eyes with a terrified Ben. It had taken a lot of calming to get Ben on a broom, so he wasn't quite sure how Damien had talked the preteen into this.
Ben nodded, dark eyes locking with Charlie's as he slowly started climbing back down. Damien had said nothing about flying, the other boy had told him that they could see more of the grounds from up here, which they could. While it was beautiful, he would much rather be on the ground. He got about halfway down and his foot slipped. He screeched, gasping when his eyes found the ground. He was too high up, he was going to fall. He flinched when warm hands wrapped around his waist and plunked him off the tree.
"It's okay Ben, you are okay." Charlie soothed, rubbing a hand over the child's back when the boy buried his head in his shirt and wrapped his legs around his torso. He rocked slightly, trying to soothe the frightened preteen. At least the boy had been far enough down that he could grab him. His eyes caught sight of Damien as the young boy leaped off of his branch, a good twenty feet up.
"Damien!" He couldn't reach his wand without putting down the child who had a death grip on him. Shit.
Damien shrieked with joy as he leaped into the air, he loved the feeling of the wind. He focused on the feeling of flying, feeling his body start to glide a little. He lost his concentration when he heard his name, eyes glancing toward Charlie before the dark-skinned child realized he was now falling. He closed his eyes, bracing himself for impact. But after a moment, he opened his eyes again. He had stopped moving.
Kate took a breath, eyes focused on the preteen, hand out stretched. She slowly brought her hand down, lowering the child until his feet touched the ground. She took another deep breath, closing her hand so that the magic released the child. "Never do that again, Damien. You were too high up to jump safely to the ground. You could have severely hurt yourself." She scolded, crouching so that she was on the preteen's level. She had seen what he had been trying to do, after all.
"I was trying to fly!" He argued, glaring at the woman. She wasn't his counselor, so he didn't have to listen to her. Well, he knew that wasn't true. The two younger groups spent a lot of time together and they did listen to both sets of counselors. He picked at the edge of his robes for a moment before hiding his face in his robe. He could still smell and feel Tim in these robes, it was one of the reasons he didn't take the healer robes off. It made him feel safe.
She sighed softly, catching Charlie's eye for a moment before turning back to the child. "Damien...it is really really hard to fly like that on purpose. Have you done it when you were scared before?" She questioned quietly, locking eyes with the child.
He nodded silently, tilting his head. He had seen the last few seconds of her lowering him to the ground and she hadn't used a wand. There weren't many of the adults he had seen do magic without a wand and never like that. "Can you?"
"Fly?" She hesitated, glancing back at Charlie for a moment before returning her eyes to his. "Yes. But not until I was much older than you are. Your magic hasn't developed enough to be able to do that for an extended period of time. I know you were just playing but magic like that isn't really something to play with. You can get severely hurt." She added quietly, keeping her voice low enough that only Damien could hear it. Charlie would assume she had just done wandless magic and that was all he needed to know. Damien, however...if he told Eric or Tim, they would have questions that she really didn't want to answer.
He frowned, rubbing his hand over the healer symbol on his robe for a long moment. "When will I be able to fly?" He kept his voice low like Kate did, understanding quickly that she wanted to keep this private, even if he didn't quite know why. There was nothing wrong with doing magic that way, was there? Maybe Eric and Tim would know.
"I don't know Damien. It's not something that happens over night. Be patient and don't try to force it by jumping from high places. Alright?" She replied, glancing toward where Charlie was still calming Ben. She didn't want to think of what could have happened if Ben had panicked higher up or had knocked Damien over in his panic. Both boys could have been severely hurt. "Let's stay on the ground for the rest of today. I don't think mine or Charlie's hearts can handle another scare like that." She added at a normal volume so that Charlie could hear.
Damien shrugged, giving a half nod before taking off to where Chris and Malik were kicking a ball back and forth.
Charlie sighed softly when Ben finally stopped his iron grip but remained wrapped around him. "Do you want down?" He asked quietly, smiling at the frantic shake of the boy's head. "Hey, it's okay. You don't have to get down." He adjusted his hold on the preteen so that the boy would be more comfortable. He understood why Ben wouldn't want down, besides the brief scare the child had. This was a boy who had never experienced physical touch until he came to Hogwarts. He wasn't going to deny him that comfort. He caught Kate's eye, raising an eyebrow at her as he rubbed the preteen's back.
She shrugged, gazing pointedly at the child in his arms before turning her eyes back to the grounds, carefully searching for each of her girls and his boys.
So she wasn't going to tell him what that hushed conversation with Damien was about. He was curious about what spell she had used, it seemed quicker than the one he had used before. Perhaps she would tell him later this evening, after they got their respective kids in bed.
-x-
"Please Rose, it hurts." Karrie pleaded, eyes squeezed shut. She couldn't handle the magic. It was too much. Way too much. Rose had never said no before, so why would she now?
She hesitated for a moment before reaching out and taking the younger girl's hand. "It's okay, Karrie. Just take a deep breath for me, alright?" She couldn't leave the young girl in pain. She just couldn't do it. Eric just didn't understand, there wasn't any real danger to doing this. But not doing it, leaving Karrie to handle the magic alone, that was dangerous.
She opened her eyes as the pain slowly started to disappear. The buzzing faded and while magic still danced over her skin, it was no longer overwhelming. Active magic tended to overload her senses, so sometimes she had to get rid of it, pass it through Rose. Because Rose could turn active magic back to its original form. And that helped. She grimaced suddenly, trying to tug her hand out of Rose's. They were in the infirmary, she was suppose to come off the crutches today and Eric had wanted to check the progress of her leg. It wasn't Eric approaching and while she didn't think Lucas would notice the magic transfer, she didn't want to get Rose in any more trouble. "Lucas is coming." She whispered, catching the older girl's eyes.
She hesitated for a moment before quickly ending the transfer. Karrie seemed to be in less pain, at least, for the moment. She still wasn't quite sure how the girl knew but the green eyed preteen had yet to be wrong. "Okay. I'm going to check on Emma. Find me before you leave." She responded quietly, standing and turning to leave just as Lucas knocked on the door. "Let me get my new magazine and I'll show you the newest hair trends we can try." She added at a normal volume, smiling innocently at Lucas before quickly heading out of that room.
He shook his head, eyes focused more on the preteen than the teenager. Who did she think she was trying to fool? He knew when something was off with his patients, no matter how hard they tried to hide it. It just made him wonder what exactly Rose and Karrie were hiding. Lucas sighed softly, eyes landing on the preteen's cast. "Sorry about the wait, Karrie. Let's remove this and have a look, alright?" He gently moved her leg so that it was stretched out on the exam table she had been sitting on, tapping his wand to her cast. He frowned at her flinch, pausing his movements. "Did that hurt?"
She quickly shook her head, biting her lip. Of course it had hurt, the spell had quickly leaped onto her leg and the magic was stinging her skin. Lucas' magic felt so much different from Eric's, though she knew that it was the spell that hurt, not his magic.
The cast had quickly split open, so he could see her leg. It shouldn't have pulled or pinched her but he knew that reaction. He had been a pediatric healer for nearly two decades and Eric had brought him on as a member of the healing staff a few weeks earlier. Even though they were down a healer and he had a few sleepless nights, his eyes still watched every reaction a patient made carefully. Especially these children, these children who had been beaten so often that they easily hid pain. He had never seen so many of them in one place at the same time before and he had said quite a few choice words the more medical files he went through. He knew she wouldn't tell him if it hurt, so he figured he'd have to do this without his wand. Which was a bit more taxing on his magic, but it would prevent him from accidentally causing her pain, he hoped. He gently placed one hand under her knee and one over it, letting his magic slowly sink into her skin. He felt the bone with his magic, frowning suddenly. Her knee had been dislocated with a small fracture almost a week ago. With magic, it should have been over halfway healed by now. The dislocation was gone, her knee was fine. But the tibia, which had a tiny fracture, now had a much bigger one. "Have you fallen recently Karrie?"
She hesitated, tilting her head slightly. She had hoped that Lucas would decide she was healed enough and leave the cast off. She didn't quite know why he was asking that. "No." Sort of. But it hadn't really been a fall. More like a slip.
"You sure?"
She bit the inside of her cheek, nodding slightly and not looking at the older man. It didn't matter, her leg should still be okay.
He shook his head, letting his magic completely surround the break and settle the bone back into place. "You had a small fracture to your tibia. Somehow you managed to make the break much worse." He gave a soft smile at scowl on her face. Clearly, that wasn't what she wanted to hear.
"So I have to keep the cast?"
"Worse, you have to keep the crutches for another week. I'm going to place a new cast, since the break has moved." He retrieved the supplies he needed from a nearby cabinet, before gently wrapping her leg and tapping the cast with his wand to harden it.
Great. Crutches for another week and all because she had slipped in a courtyard trying to escape from Rani. "Okay." She grumbled finally, feeling the magic in the air try to comfort her. She let it dance on her skin until he finished with the cast, allowing the magic to distract her from the flare of pain.
Lucas found the pain potion he had been looking for, offering it to the child. He knew she was in pain, healing breaks was painful, and he also knew that she wouldn't have told him. "Drink this please, it will help. And then you may have a cookie. I have chocolate chip."
"Two cookies." She bargained, slowly taking hold of the potion. At his nod, she tilted it back and drank it, recognizing the feel of the magic within it. It was one of Severus' potions and it quickly made her pain vanish.
"May I help you down?" He requested, waiting for her nod. He wasn't going to let a child with a broken tibia get down by herself and she seemed to realize that. He carefully rested his hands on her waist, lifting the underweight child off the table and gently setting her on her feet. He kept a grasp on her as she found her balance before moving to give her the crutches back and to get the jar of cookies. "Try to take it easy this week, Karrie. I would like to get you out of that cast before school starts back." He remarked calmly, setting the jar back on the counter after she had snatched two.
"I'll try." She shrugged, quickly maneuvering herself out of the room. She would love to be out of the cast by the end of August. She didn't want her housemates asking uncomfortable questions, after all.
-x-
Alexis sighed, following the call from the castle further and further into the maze of hallways and classrooms. She was far from the camp, somewhere on the sixth floor, trying to find whoever it was that was setting off alarms in her mind. She stopped outside of one of the upper level runes class, feeling the magic coming from that room. She was almost certain it wasn't a student. She slowly, cautiously opened the door, raising an eyebrow as she stepped inside.
"Kate?"
She spun around, moving her hands away from the rune stones she had discovered. She knew better than to touch them, her curiosity just got the better of her. "Headmistress?" She gasped, trying to force herself not to stutter. She was always so nervous around the older woman, even after the...incident.
"I..I..what are you doing here?"
"I should ask you the same. I was following a high concentration of magic and a distress signal from the castle. You?" She responded firmly, keeping her tone soft. She didn't want to frighten Kate and the other woman always seemed to be frightened around other adults. She was wonderful with the children but around adults she became a bundle of nerves.
She grimaced, biting her lip. Her touching the runes had sent off a distress signal? Maybe she really shouldn't be here after all.
"Kate...talk to me. Please?" She requested quietly, forcing down a sigh. The younger woman seemed to have shut down.
She absently brushed her hand against one of the rune stones, feeling a burst of calmness. She wasn't suppose to touch them, she knew her magic could harm them, but in the few minutes after she had discovered them, they had made her feel calm. She closed her hand around the stone, feeling the magic in it, allowing it to push her mind far away from where it had been. "I'm fine, Headmistress."
"You're not. Talk to me, please."
"I..I can't...I just..."
She moved slowly, keeping her motions deliberate, before gently taking hold of Kate's free hand. "You can. Tell me what's wrong." She instructed firmly, rubbing a thumb over the back of Kate's hand. She was hoping it would be calming but she also knew that one wrong move could send Kate to completely shut down. "You are safe here. No one is going to hurt you here."
She squeezed the rune tighter, trying to ignore the hand gently holding her own. Alexis wouldn't understand, how could she? Seeing Damien being so free with his magic had caught her off guard. It had brought back memories, memories she could block when surrounded by the children but when she was alone, they hit full force. She hated feeling scared so much but she couldn't stop it. Couldn't make herself less afraid. As much as she wanted to, she knew that she couldn't explain. Because they wouldn't keep her if they knew. Who would want a freak like her around their children. "I'm fine."
"So your fucked up, insecure, neurotic, and emotional? I know you are breathing, Kate. But I also know you are hurting. You don't have to tell me, but it'll help. It will make whatever it is a little bit easier." She responded, sighing softly. She had to fight to keep from snapping at the younger woman. She knew she wasn't alright and she knew Kate knew that. They were both healers, after all.
"You wouldn't understand!" She snapped, clenching her hand but still not pulling away from Alexis.
"Try me."
She took a breath, trying to force herself to be calm, to not give in and just tell her. How could she understand? "Damien, he...he tried to.."She grimaced, biting her lip hard enough that she tasted blood.
"He jumped out of at tree, but he wasn't harm. From what Charlie said, you caught him." She replied quietly, tilting her head slightly. From what she had understood, Damien had been playing. He hadn't been trying to harm herself. So it didn't make sense as to why she was so upset.
"No. He was trying to fly. And I stopped him. But I shouldn't have, not like that. Not suppose to use magic like that." She flinched when a hand gently gripped her other wrist.
She closed her eyes for a brief moment, suddenly understanding exactly where this was going. After all, she had done her research. She should have had this talk with Kate the moment she had realized her abilities. She had hoped, however, that Tim or Eric would handle it before she had to. "Kate. You protected Damien from harm. I'd say that was a great way to use your gift."
"Curse." She corrected, shaking her head. It wasn't a gift. But how did Alexis know? And why had she kept her so long?
She hated that there were magicals who thought elemental magic was wrong, dangerous. It wasn't, not if it was used properly. "Only if you let it be." She responded, meeting shocked eyes when they flew to hers. "Do you know, I thought my emphatic magic was a curse for the longest time. I shouted that at Tim one morning and he told me it was only a curse if I let it be. You have elemental magic. That isn't a curse, Kate. There are mages would who love to have your abilities."
"At least you had other emphatic mages. Beauxbatons had courses on elemental magic, for those without the natural abilities and even had classes for those born with this gifts. I wasn't allow to take either of them. And even then, all the other students were water and earth, the common elemental gifts. I was still a freak." She snapped, closing her eyes for a brief moment. The headmistress had people like her to teach her, but she had had to teach herself control. How to use her magic, how to shape it. And the amount of wands she had broke!
"What did they do to you?" She asked softly. She was a mind healer, so the outbursts and anger didn't surprise or shock her. She knew only a little about the hell Kate, who was magic-born, had gone through but that was enough for her to know how hard the younger woman's life had been.
"The first time I flew, they had...they threw.. out a window. A window. I was seven, Alexis. Seven. They decided that I, that I'm.. a freak. I'm a freak. So I couldn't take runes or elemental magic or any of those classes. " She forced herself to take a deep breath, trying to calm herself before she started sobbing. Because Damien had brought those memories back, the windows she was thrown out of, the roofs she was pushed off...The child had brought it all back.
She didn't hesitated, gently tugging the younger woman into her arms and hugging her tightly. She had to force down her anger that Kate had suffered so. No wonder she was afraid of her own shadow, if she had been taught to fear her own magic. "I am so sorry that they did that to you. They were wrong. You are not a freak. You have a different magical talent, that's all. It's okay. I got you Kate. I got you." She murmured softly, stroking her hand down the other woman's back.
She grasped tightly to the woman hugging her, craving the physical affection she had been denied for so long, the rune stone still gripped in her hand. She closed her eyes, finally letting the tears fall, burying her face in Alexis' shoulder.
"I got you."She whispered, tightening her hold on the younger woman. She wished that she could have protected Kate from everything that had been done to her. She couldn't change the past, but she could protect her in the future. No one would harm the other woman while she was around, not it she could help it.
-x-
He frowned in concentration, eyes focused on the simmering potion. He carefully dropped in the last ingredient, stirring swiftly. Severus stepped back, setting a timer. The potion had to simmer for a few hours before he could bottle it. This large batch of children's sleeping potion would hopefully last until school started back. It wasn't dreamless, which was dangerous to give to children and teenagers in large quantities. This was a potion he had invented, which would still let the child dream but would prevent nightmares and help ease a frightened child to sleep. This was one of the potions he had created to get his Mastery and one that they were extremely low on. He glanced to his left, to the teenage boy slowly stirring a potion in concentration. He could tell from a glance that it wouldn't work. But his apprentice needed to find that out for himself.
The red head growled, fighting the urge to throw down his stirring rod. The last time he had done that, he had felt the effects of a stinging spell for an hour. But he was frustrated, because it wasn't changing. If his process had worked, the potion should have changed by now. He could either admit defeat on this attempt and start over, or keep going and hope that it would react correctly further on. He didn't want to start over, again. He had been working on this stupid potion for three days and he still couldn't figure out the ingredients he could replace with a different one and have a stronger potion. Bain was beginning to think that there wasn't a way to do this, that it was a test of his patience and he was failing. He had to write up every attempt, even if it failed, and why it did or didn't worked. He was very close to giving up. He frowned down at his parchment, adding the next ingredient on his list, stirring it for a moment before pulling back when it started hissing.
He sighed softly, vanishing the potion with a wave of his wand. "Do I want to know why you thought that would work?" He inquired, not bothering to turn away from his own work. That was Bain's third attempted today, the younger man still hadn't figured out how to solve the problem he had given him.
He grumbled a couple of choice words under his breath, extinguishing the flame under his cauldron and moving to clean up the counter top he had used for his ingredients. He wasn't going to do it again, he was done with that potion. "Can I brew something that actually works?"
"That depends. Have you even opened the book I gave you?" He answered, turning and catching the teenager's eyes.
He huffed, looking away from his master quickly. He had but it didn't matter. He couldn't read Latin, not that he would tell Severus that. The man wouldn't believe him anyway. No one ever had; he had only told one teacher but that was enough.
That answered that then. No wonder the teenager was struggling so much. "Read the introduction and chapter three, and then you can brew some burn salve for me. " He instructed, gesturing toward the chair at one of the work tables before turning back to the bubbling cauldron of a pain potion, this one targeted more to headaches and minor pains.
"No. I'd rather brew." What would the man think of him if he told him he couldn't read Latin? What would Alexis think?
"Excuse me?"
"I'm not reading that stupid book." He flushed, knowing he sounded childish but he didn't see any other way to avoid this. Because he should be able to read Latin, he was a wizard after all.
He blinked, forcing himself to take a deep breath, checking his potion to make sure it was simmering before turning to face the teenage. Severus tilted his head, raising an eyebrow. The boy was blushing and he didn't sound angry, but upset. Something was going on with his apprentice and he was going to get to the bottom of it. It wasn't like Bain to fuss over being instructed to read or write something. Sure, the teenager grumbled when he gave him another set of worksheets but he still grumbled when he had to use similar worksheets to improve his potions. "That stupid book is important for anyone pursuing a career in potions and herbology to read. It will certainly help you with your current problem." He replied calmly, frowning when the boy turned a brighter red.
Oh. But he couldn't read it! He tried to push his frustration down, tried to force himself to not get angry. But he was getting mad because he couldn't do it! It didn't matter how hard he tried, he couldn't read it! He huffed again, clenching his hands into tight fists, digging nails into soft flesh.
He turned, casting a stasis charm over the cauldrons he was actively brewing before turning back to the tall red head. "Bain. Tell me what is wrong." He requested softly, letting his concern show in his eyes. He wasn't quite sure what had caused the clear anger and embarrassment he could see in the teen's face, but he was going to get to the bottom up it. He had been having Bain meditate with him before they brewed, so that the boy learned to control his emotions under the pressure of brewing.
He bit his lip, shaking his head. He glanced toward the stupid book before quickly looking away.
So the book was part of it. Of all the books he had given the boy, what was different about this one? What made the teenager not want to even try? "What's going on, Bain? Can you tell me why you are upset?" He requested finally, when the boy remained silent still.
He closed his eyes, clenching his fists tight for a moment. "I can't...I can't read it."
The teenager couldn't read it? What was so difficult about this text? It wasn't that different from the other ones, except.."You can't read Latin?" It never occurred to him that Bain couldn't read Latin. While Alexis was making Latin classes mandatory for all first years and any other students who needed them, he knew that Filius taught all of his students Latin, much like he did.
"No sir."
"There's no reason to be ashamed, Bain. I know plenty of people who can't read Latin." But usually not one of his or Filius' students. That did make several things suddenly more clear. No wonder the boy struggled when he put the Latin names for plants on the worksheets and instructions.
" I took the Latin lessons sir. I can speak it fine and once someone says the spells, I can figure them out. I just can't read or write it." He explained, eyes darting up under the mess that was his hair before darting away.
Almost all of his lessons and class text books were in English, although parts of the Seventh year one were in Latin. But Severus knew that there was at least one teacher who had expected students to read completely in Latin from third year on, although they weren't required to write in it outside of technical terms. "How did you pass Transfiguration?"
He flushed again, knowing that his answer was going to sound really childish. "My roommate. He would read aloud every reading we had and he taught me to write the technical terms. He has been trying to teach me to read it for years but...I'm dyslexic. It is hard enough for me to read in English, much less a language where all the letters jumble together. He's mundane-born as well, so he understood. Any texts we had in Latin, he reads them to me when we are in our room at night. He's not here and I couldn't get the translation spell to stick." He replied, finally making eye contact with the older man. His roommate also happened to be one of his closest friends. The other boy wasn't there that summer and he was glad for that, it meant he had a good family, but there was no one to read it to him and he couldn't ask anyone. Elijah would have laughed and Teddy wouldn't have understood the technical terms or more difficult passages, because he wasn't at that reading level yet. Granted, he wasn't either, in any language. But he did try.
"Why didn't you tell anyone, Bain?" He questioned quietly, sighing softly. That explained a lot more than it didn't. The child had dyslexia, he should have had a tutor. He hadn't seen in it the teenager's file and he knew Filius would have mentioned it when he had taken the boy as an apprentice. Because Bain's reading was probably not up to year level, which would explain why if the teenager read quickly, he didn't seem to comprehend any of what he had read. He had repeatedly had to make the teen read instructions and texts again, so he was going to have to make him slow down when he read.
"I did. I told the bitch." He shrugged, grimacing at the look Severus shot him. "McGonagall. I told her in third year and she refused to believe me. She kept giving me zeros so Zac started reading to me."
"You could have told your Head of House, you could have told me. There were so many other professors who would have believed you and given you the resources you needed." He did understand though. This was an abused child who had told something he kept hidden and when it wasn't believed by one person, he doubted anyone else would believe him.
He shrugged again, shuffling his feet slightly. "My father told me it made me weak, so he refused to let my primary school help me. He even moved me schools when they started asking questions. I didn't think anyone would believe me." He whispered, shaking his head. He had been moved schools often and now that he was older, he had figured out why. Back then he had just believed the lies that he was too stupid for any of those schools.
"He was wrong." Severus stated firmly, locking dark eyes with blue. "This text will not, unfortunately, hold a translating spell. I'll see if I can order an English copy. Until then, I will read it to you." He held up a hand to stop the teenager before he could protest. "I am your Master and this is my decision."
"But sir! You don't have to do that! I can get by." He protested, face still red. He didn't want the older man thinking he was stupid or a baby! He could manage. He shouldn't have even told him that Zac read to him. Wasn't there a spell to do the same?
He sighed softly, not bothering to block out the thoughts the young man was projecting, loudly at that. "You aren't stupid, Bain. Nor do I believe you to be anything but the talented, intelligent you man that you are." He stated calmly, shaking his head at the glare. "You were projecting. Now, which language does Zac read to you in?" He added, raising an eyebrow as the teenager huffed. Didn't he realize how young pouting made him look? It was almost adorable in a way. At least the boy felt safe enough with him to pout and grumble, to be a teenager.
"English."
Damn. That was an extremely good friend. The boy had to translate it and then read it out loud. At his age, he was comfortable doing this, even if it might take a little longer. But Bain's friend wasn't anywhere close to his age and the child had started reading to him in English, from Latin, at thirteen. "That's a good friend you have there."
"I know, sir. It helps that we trade. I help him with potions and herbology and he reads to me." Bain gave a slight smile, before glancing toward the text.
He nodded, summoning the book and the stand he used for his notes and recipes. "Can you listen and brew?" He inquired, flipping to the appropriate page before finiting the stasis spell.
"Yes sir."
"Start on the burn salve then. The recipe is on that table." Although the boy should know it by now. It was only the fourth or so batch they had brewed this summer. Hopefully this last batch would get their stock high enough to get them through to the Winter Solstice. "The art of brewing can only be achieved with use of the proper ingredients and techniques. A strong understanding of plants and how to properly prepare them to the highest quality will be discussed here..." He read, allowing his soft tone to carry as his carefully prepared ingredients for one of his own potions. He would have to test the boy's reading levels later but for now, he would just read aloud. After all, it wouldn't hurt him to remember some of this again.
-x-
Elijah grumbled, not looking at the counselor he had just walked into. He had just convinced his friends he was going to eat dinner in Alexis' quarters so he could finish some of his work, which was partly true. He did still have summer work to finish, although not much. But he knew that Paul would not believe him. The counselors were watching him so closely at meals, it was frustrating. So he had just decided to skip them, to avoid their concern.
"Where are you going, Elijah?" Paul asked quietly, fighting back a sigh. He had been heading to dinner himself, where the teenager should be, but he wasn't surprised to run into the teen. Many of the teenagers were fighting ingrained, bad habits; there were a few who skipped meals, a few they watched closely to make sure that they were actually trying to eat. Elijah was one of those few.
"To Alexis' quarters. Homework." He shrugged, still avoiding eye contact. It was the truth though. He had been planning to try his homework. He only had one essay left but it was for a class he hated passionately.
He raised an eyebrow, sensing the truth in that statement. But he also knew that there was more to it than that. "Have you ate today?"
"Yes sir." Robert had forced him to eat a banana half way through the morning. There was a downside to having a boyfriend who cared about him.
He glanced around them, sighing this time. This was not the place for this conversation, it wasn't one to have an a corridor. "Why don't you come to my office for a little bit?" He offered quietly, quirking a brow at the teenager. He could connect the dots of what the child wasn't say. "I won't make you eat." He added, seeing the hesitance on the boy's face. He wouldn't, either. They couldn't really force the child to eat. That didn't mean, however, that he wouldn't give him a nutritional supplement.
He hesitated, thinking it over for a moment. If he went to Paul's office, even if the man tried to get him to talk about it, he would have a valid excuse for missing dinner when Jake or Alexis asked, and they would ask. "Okay." He shrugged finally, moving to follow the older man. He was coming to trust Paul, the man was his mindhealer after, so if he said he wouldn't force him to eat, he believed him.
Paul held open the door to his office, gesturing for the boy to enter. He shut the door behind them, moving to sit in one of the armchairs, away from his desk. He had found that children tended to open up more if they weren't separated from him by a desk. It created a distance between him and his patients, a distance that made reaching them harder. But sitting in a nearby armchair, facing them without an obstacle between them, created more of a connection, of a safe space. A few of the teenage boys had finally started seeking him out, although not this particular child.
"You're missing supper." Elijah stated quietly, dropping into his usual armchair. He didn't like that the older man was not going to eat because of him.
He shrugged slightly, tilting his head to study the teenager. He had realized, recently, that Elijah was not completely emotionally dark, that the child did allow himself to feel. He just didn't normally show emotions in front of other. Like many of the other teens, he hid behind a mask that he had perfected over years of abuse. But slowly the teen was dropping that mask. He could see the concern the boy had for him, after all. Worry and regret that he was missing a meal because of him. If only Elijah cared about himself as much as he did others. "Would you like tea?"
He nodded, giving a slight smile when the man ordered his favourite tea. A tea tray popped into the room and he waited until the healer had taken a cup before pouring himself a cup. There were some teas that he just loved. And a basket of biscuits and cookies had come with the tea.
"Easy on the sugar." He admonished, watching the blond dump teaspoon after teaspoon into his mug. At least the boy was getting some calories, even if they weren't the right kind calories. "You don't have to worry about me, Elijah. As I've told all of you boys, I always have time for you. Plus, the elves always save a plate or two in case one of us gets called away."
"I just hate that you have to miss supper because of me." Elijah shrugged, dunking a biscuit into his tea before taking a small bite of it. He knew it wasn't the type of food they wanted him to eat, but it was food even if he knew he couldn't eat much of it.
"I am choosing to eat a late supper so that I can spend some time talking with you. It is my choice Elijah." He responded firmly, taking a sip of his own tea. While he could push the child to talk about why he wouldn't eat or what was on his mind, he knew that it would be better to let Elijah direct their conversation. Because that was what it was, a conversation. Although he would make notes in Elijah's file later if he needed to, this wasn't a session. The boy would have bolted if he had tried that.
He frowned, furrowing his brows in thought. He had so rarely had an adult who wanted to spent time with him, much less spend time talking to him before this summer. It still felt so new. "I think I finally convinced Robert that he couldn't hurt me." He remarked, watching the healer closely to gauge his response.
"That must have taken a lot of fast talking." He replied quietly, fighting down a chuckle. He had a feeling that it was Bain who had finally convinced Robert to at least try, not Elijah. Because he had heard and seen many of their interactions, and Robert was always so careful with the younger teen.
He shrugged, dunking his biscuit down in his tea before taking another tentative bite. "It was worth it."
"You really like him, don't you?"
"I've had a crush on him since March but he was so out of my league." Elijah blushed, not looking at the other man. Robert had been so far out of reach; in a different year, a different house, a different social group. But here, all of the teenagers were in the same boat. They weren't separated by age or house or preference.
He did smile then, watching the teenager. He had known that the two had feelings for each other, anyone with eyes could tell that, but he hadn't been sure if it was a fling or if the two wanted to be more serious than that. He was pretty certain now that it was the latter. " You moved in different social circles but that doesn't mean he was out of your league. From what I've seen, he likes you just as much." Better, Robert's temper was much easier contained when Elijah was around.
"I know that but sometimes it just feels...I don't know." He stopped, chewing on his lip for a moment.
"It feels like your not good enough?" Paul inquired, not unkindly. At the boy's shocked eyes and rapid nod, he gave a soft sigh. "I remember that feeling well.
There was this girl, when I was about your age, named Sally Briggs. She was so kind and funny and pretty, but I never got up the nerve to talk to her, because I felt that I wasn't good enough for her." He had an idea, now, that he might know partly why the teenager struggled to eat. Besides the obvious control it gave him. "Do you skip meals because you are afraid of losing Robert?" He asked quietly, catching the boy's eyes when they darted up to him.
How could he possibly know that? He could control whether he ate or not, it gave him power and control over his life. But it had gotten a bit worse because he was afraid Robert wouldn't like him if he got fatter. That he had to be slimmer and built, otherwise the next hot body might catch the older boy's attention. "Sometimes." He answered finally, still staring at the older man.
That was more of an answer than he thought he would get. But it was one that wasn't unexpected. He had figured part of Elijah's eating disorder stemmed from a need to control something, anything, and from that answer, he was almost sure he was right. He had also thought it might come from body image distortion. Honestly, almost all eating disorders had a combination of both. He was sure now that Elijah did have an eating disorder and wasn't just having issues with eating. His body language was practically screaming it at him, particularly when he asked about Robert. " I know it's hard not feeling good enough for someone, that feeling really sucks. But Elijah, Robert wouldn't be with you if he didn't like you for who you are." He commented quietly, taking a sip of his tea when the teen looked away.
"It's...It's so hard." He muttered, swinging his legs back and forth into the armchair.
"I know it is."
"Do we have to talk about this?"
"Not unless you want to." Paul replied slowly, knowing that the conversation was probably finished. He wouldn't get much else out of the boy about his eating disorder or boyfriend, unless Elijah decided to share it.
He bit his lip, thinking for a moment. He really didn't want to talk about it anymore. Even if Paul was just talking to him as an older friend and not as his counselor. "Can we talk about football?"
"As long as it's not American."
"Gods no. " He shuddered, shaking his head. Elijah couldn't stand what the Americans called football. It was more like rugby but with much more padding and it took forever.
He laughed, grinning at the younger boy. "Football it is. I personally think the German team is going to take the cup this year."
"Not if Sweden has any choice in the matter!"
-x-