A/N: Do not own. This chapter gets a bit dark in places, fair warning. X's are scene breaks. Words in - - are signed. Enjoy and as always, use your words.
She sighed softly, glancing toward the floo once more. They were waiting for Lucius. He had floo'd Eric with news about Derek's mother but had wanted to discuss it as a group, with his counselor and headmistress there. Apparently Lucius didn't want to say it more than once, which told her it was bad. She glanced toward Henry, frowning slightly. She knew why she was avoiding Eric but she wasn't quite sure why Henry was. When Eric had floo'd in, they both had gone silent. Alexis just now realized that Henry had also, and was still, avoiding looking at Eric.
Eric glanced between the two younger healers, shaking his head. If it wasn't for Lucius news, he had a feeling both would still be avoiding him. He had given Henry more time than he normally would have, hoping the healer would come back to him on his own. But since that clearly wasn't going to happen, he would have to take matters into his own hands. He just hoped the two younger healers could make it through this without losing control of their magic. Because he had know Lucius since the young man was not more than a teenager, before Narcissa became Alexis' tutor. Before their son was born. He had been Lucius' healer when the man had first escaped the horrors he had been forced into and he knew that look in Lucius' eyes quite well. Something was seriously wrong. "Lucius?" He questioned, when the floo went off and the blond stepped into Alexis' office.
He ran a hand through his hair, eyes glinting for a moment. "My sources found Derek's mother." He stated quietly, fighting to keep his tone emotionless, eyes going to the young headmistress. He knew her well enough to know that she would want to be the one who told the child and his cousins. But he also knew that her first respond was going to be rage. Because while Alexis had not had loving, caring parents, parents she would care about, she would be angry that that was snatched from one of her students.
"I take it, it's not good." Eric commented, following his eyes to Alexis.
"Just tell us, Lucius. And then I have another matter to discuss with you." She stated finally, meeting his eyes for a long moment. She had this feeling, no matter how much she wished she was wrong, that she already knew what he was going to say.
"We found her body buried on Derek's father's land. My team called in a mundane team and we are working with them. As it stands Derek's father will never be able to gain custody of him or his cousins. The detective I work with said that they had used a machine to scan the land and they were almost certain there were more bodies there. From the state of his mother's body, they have concluded that he beat her to death. It seems that his brother might also be involved, at least in the aftermath. The detective is charging him with murder." He stated quietly, closing his eyes for a moment. As soon as his team had called him, he had apparated over and then had his team contacted the police, a detective and his team that they worked with regularly. After he had finished soothing the younger members of his team and had spoken with the older, more experienced ones, he had gone with the detective to where the body was. It had not been a pleasant sight.
She closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. "How long?"
"The medical examiner estimated that she had been dead for at least six years." He responded quietly. It never got easier, his job. He had a feeling he was going to need to floo his mind healer that night, so he could sleep without seeing those bodies in his dreams.
"Derek said he last saw her when he was nine, almost ten. He went to school with his cousins one morning and when they came home, she was gone. He just turned fifteen." Henry remarked quietly, forcing down the anger he could feel. He had hoped that they would find Derek's mother alive and well, that she had escaped the abuse and was trying to get the children. He wasn't sure how the teenager would take the news but he had a feeling they would be seeing more of Derek's anger in the coming days. There was something else that was bothering him though. Those other bodies they had found... "Did they identify any of the other bodies?"
Lucius blinked, frowning slightly. "When I left our two teams had just started the retrieval process." Unfortunately, although the other team knew about magic, they had to do it the mundane way to keep from damaging the bodies, since they weren't sure how long the bodies had been there. He raised an eyebrow at the sudden ringing noise, pulling his phone from his pocket. Filius had worked some magic so that his phone was now charmed to work in magically dense areas. It was an older model which helped. The newer, higher tech ones still didn't work in dense magical areas.
"You have a phone?" Alexis frowned, tilting her head. Her office had a small landline that they used to communicate with mundane parents but she hadn't thought a phone that small would work surrounded by so much magic. As long as the older mundane-borns didn't start bringing their cell phones with them to school, it wasn't an issue.
"Filius charmed it." Lucius explained glancing at the name. "Excuse me for a moment." He moved away from where the healers had been sitting, flipping the phone open. "Lucius speaking."
"It's Mack, Lucius. We were right about the bodies. So far our teams had unearthed three and they are following the infrared." The detective sighed, eyes going to the younger members of both of their teams. They both ran their teams the same way, they both cared for the people they had picked and they both only picked the best. His eyes darted to where he heard retching and he waved to one of the older ones. The woman looked toward him and he gestured toward the younger man.
Charlotte nodded, moving to the vomiting young man. He was one of Lucius' but not the first to get sick that day. She had just calmed Anne, one of their's, down. Sometimes she had to wonder if Mack kept her around because she was good at mothering, particularly those who hadn't had mothers.
"Do we know who they are yet?"
"Not yet. The M.E has ages so far but- LEWIS! Don't you dare do that or your ass is mine!" He shouted, eyes locking on the dark-skinned young man. He moved toward him quickly, even though his shout had caught the man's attention, as well as the rest of his colleagues. Of all the times to take foolish, stupid risks..
"It was just an idea!" He huffed, blushing slightly. Lewis glanced at the snorting wizard standing near him, growling slightly at the man with darker skin than his. They were close in age and they both seemed to attract trouble. It wasn't the first time they had worked together after all.
"Tell me Kingsley and Lewis haven't gotten themselves in another sticky situation." He requested quietly, closing his eyes for a moment. Kingsley was going to be the death of him. The man was a hell of an auror but he seemed to struggle with not taking serious risks when they weren't needed.
"Not yet. As I was saying, we have age estimations. At least one infant and the other two are somewhere between twelve and fifteen." Mack sighed softly, turning toward where Chris was at the man's shout. "I got to go, Chris just found another body. Come back when you can, I have a feeling we will be here for a while." If it was another child, he might have to call his psychologist later that day.
He closed his phone, taking a deep breath before turning back around to face the healers in the room and moving to sit down. He dropped into the nearest armchair, running a hand over his face. "They just found a fifth body. The three others they identified are all children. They haven't ID'd them yet and I don't have information on how long they have been in the ground." Lucius remarked quietly, shaking his head. At least three children buried on that land. How could anyone not have noticed this, not have known that something was wrong in that house.
Henry closed his eyes, feeling the rage flood his body. "Their cousins." He whispered, clenching his fists tightly and trying to force the anger back down. It wasn't working.
She frowned, feeling the energy in the air before turning silver eyes toward Henry. The anger on his face was shocking. The man had iron control of his emotions, he had never looked like he was going to explode before. "Breathe Henry." She ordered quietly, sighing when he ignored her. "Henry!"
He opened his eyes, turning cold blue eyes to meet hers. "Yes?" He growled, trying to force down the anger again.
"Take a deep breath and hold it in. Good. Now release the breath and let your anger flow out with it. Deep breath. Release." She instructed firmly, meeting his eyes as he obeyed. She had a sudden fear that she knew exactly why Henry was avoiding Eric. And if she was right, she almost felt bad for Henry. Almost.
He took a few more deep breaths, listening to her calm tone as he let his anger dissipate. He had known that Alexis would be a good healer for him, that she could handle him and all his emotions when his shield fell. But he also knew that it would interfere too much with their work. He would find another healer when he had time. "I apologize. Derek mentioned once that they had cousins who were sent to boarding school and decided not to come back. He was too young to remember their names but he remembered that there used to be a lot of people in that house." He explained, keeping his anger out of his voice. The things done to those children! It just made his so anger and he couldn't lock it down for some reason.
"I'll wait to tell Derek and Ariana until we know who else is buried out there." Alexis stated after a long moment of silence.
"I will update you as soon as I know something more." Lucius replied quietly, meeting Alexis' eyes. He knew that he had to get back soon but he had enough time that he could discuss whatever it was that Alexis needed to.
Eric nodded, standing stiffly and stretching. There was nothing they could do right now and he did have a healer he needed to have a long conversation with. He move toward Henry, resting a tight hand on the younger man's shoulder before he could disappear into the floo. "My office, now." He ordered softly, so that only Henry could hear him. He was certain that if this went on much longer, Henry would crumble. His emotions were fighting him for control, this just proved what he already knew.
Henry nodded, raising an eyebrow at the older man. If Eric didn't floo with him, he could put this off a little longer. Just until he felt in control again. Just another day or two. He pulled forward, feeling the man loosen his grip. He stepped into the floo before the healer could step beside him, letting it whisk him away.
He better as hell had gone to his office or they would be having a much longer conversation. He had talked to Henry's last healer after all, and his old master.
He knew exactly what Henry was doing.
"Eric?"
The dark skinned man paused, turning his head toward the young headmistress. So she was speaking to him then. "Yes?"
"If he needs a healer..." She trailed off when he nodded, shaking her head. "Stubborn man." She muttered, flinching when he shot her a look.
"Reminds me of someone else I know." He replied softly, sighing when her eyes dropped. "We will talk later and I will remind him that that option is still on the table." He added, waiting for her nod before stepping through the floo and into his empty office. He had a rogue healer to track down, again. It never got any easier.
"What was it you needed to discuss?" Lucius inquired, knowing that he needed to redirect her attention to him. He wasn't sure what was going on between her and Eric but he had seen enough of teenage Alexis to know that face. The younger woman didn't realize how young it made her look, he was sure, or she wouldn't still scowl like that.
She shook her head to clear it, turning her eyes to him. "Through my connections, I have found two more girls who might be able to identify his voice." She stated quietly, moving toward her desk to where she kept that specific file.
"That's five then." He sighed, running a hand over his face. Five girls, that they knew of, who had been sexually assaulted at school in the last few years by the same boy.
"Six. There's one.."She hesitated, biting her lip for a moment. She couldn't colour his view on the case, if the girls and families knew that one girl had recognized her attacker, they might be persuaded to say the same, even if they weren't sure and for this case to succeed, they had to be sure or it could get thrown out.
"You have a name." He had worked in this business long enough to know what she was trying not to say. "Don't tell me the name. Will that girl be willing to participate in the blind voice line up?"
"I have persuaded her parents to not move on it yet, they had wanted to immediately take legal action. With the help of her healer, we convinced them to wait and see if the other girls identified the same boy, as it would give all of us a much stronger case and we might be able to avoid putting the girls through a trial. She's willing to do the lineup, she just wants it over with." She responded, making a copy of a piece of parchment before offering it to him. "Here's the contact information for all of the girls parents and healers." She was curious if he would notice the same thing she had, if he would catch it.
Lucius glanced at the list, going to put it in his pocket before stopped and reading over it again. "He has a type, then." A very specific type and an unusual one. It wasn't that all of the girls had been between twelve and fourteen when assaulted that caught his eye. All of these girls were from old wizarding families. Well-connected wizarding families. Not a single one of them had a parent who was mundane or mundane-born and they were all from wizarding families who had been around for generations.
"I've seen the pictures of the girls, as well as the damage done to them, and none of them look anything alike. He isn't targeting them because of their appearance, Lucius."
"He's targeting them because of their status. But why? What could a teenage boy possibly gain by targeting well-connected girls from good families?"
She sighed, shaking her head. "Exactly what he wants. He's hurting those girls to hurt their families. Many of them are only children and the heir of their families. Think about it, Lucius. Individuals who have experienced sexual assault need help to recover, to put it behind them. These girls have the resources, if their families believe them, to get the help they need. But without those resources, they could turn to alcohol, drugs, self harm...any number of things to try to control what they feel. He is psychologically harming these girls as well. Many of them had to be pulled from school and enrolled somewhere else. He is trying to cause the greatest harm he can to these families through their girls." She hesitated, tapping her fingers for a moment. She wasn't quite sure about her next theory and she knew it would be very hard to find someone willing to talk if she was right. Because what if the boy was really targeting the families and had decided to target young boys as well. If there was nothing sexual at all about what he was doing to these girls, if it was purely because they had something he didn't and he wanted to take it away from them, he could cross genders. "If its not about sex..."
"We won't know that until we identify and interrogate the boy." He responded softly, knowing where she was heading with that. If that was the case, they would know when they talked to the boy who had harmed these girls. He had a feeling, though, that it was about sex as much as anything else. Because there were other ways to hurt these children and their families, besides sexually assaulting them. "We will get this boy, Alexis. I am going to set up the lineup times as soon as I speak with their healers. We should be able to get it done before school starts back."
She nodded, grey eyes meeting his for a long moment. "Thank you. I know you have work to get back to."
He shook his head, grimacing. He knew there would be more bodies when he got back to his team and it never got easier. He had seen a lot of bad in his life and line of work but the bodies of children still greatly upset him.
Alexis gently rested a hand on his shoulder, sending the smallest amount of calming magic into him. "I know it's hard, Lucius, and it's awful. But you have your team and they need you. You can do this."She encouraged quietly, having seen the defeat in his eyes. It was hard, what he did, especially when there were children involved. "I have some lavender oil that will help both your team and the mundane team. It's a mundane product and it has a calming effect that won't affect how you do your job." While she could give him actual calming potions, they wouldn't work on the mundane team as well as the lavender oil would and they might effect how the magical team worked. She rummaged in her desk drawer for a few minutes, finally finding the vial. She took hold of his wrist and carefully applied a few drops of lavender to it before gently rubbing his wrists together. It wasn't as immediate but it did work for longer.
He gave the young woman a half smile, taking the vial when she offered it. She was a healer through and through, he knew that it was against her nature to let him leave upset or emotional. Because while he would be upset and very emotional later, he couldn't be while he was working a case. He had to be clear-headed, otherwise that was how people got hurt and he had a team to lead. "I'll make sure I put it on everyone, although explaining it to Mack will be fun." He stated quietly, wrapping an arm around her in a brief hug, before nodding and stepping through the floo. He couldn't apparate from Hogwarts after all.
-x-
"Lila...what happened to Lani's head?" Mia questioned, signing as she spoke. The adults were encouraging her and Emma, who had quickly picked up sign language, to speak when they signed, so that Lila could connect sounds to words. According to Alexis, the smaller girl was a lot more comfortable with them than she was with the adults. She leaned back against a pillow, carefully braiding her own doll's hair
The small blond shrugged, pulling the doll's blue-haired head out of her pocket before shoving it back in. They were sitting on Emma's bed, which Lucas had widen so that all three of them could fit on it.
Emma frowned, glancing at the smallest girl. Lucas had raised the bars around her bed, so there was no chance Mia could fall off if she got jarred too much. Lila, on the other hand, wiggled from one end of the bed to the other and back again. "Did it break off, Lila? I can fix it." She offered, furrowing her brows when the preteen shook her head. "You don't want me to fix it?"
She shook her head again, twirling the doll around. It didn't bother her that her doll's head was in her pocket. She had put it there for a reason when she had taken the head off. She moved her doll toward Emma's, making it dance for a moment before traveling it back up the bed to Mia.
Mia meet Emma's eyes for a long moment, confused. Why would Lila not want Emma to fix her doll? Lila loved her doll, she had told them it was her first doll. While she didn't know the exact horrors Lila and Emma had gone through, she had talked to her parents. They had explained that the children at Hogwarts for the summer had to be removed from their homes because their parents were unfit and that sometimes, the other girls might do or say something that she didn't understand. If that happened, she could just support and comfort her friends and talk to her parents when she got home. She was still coming to the school every other day so that the healers could keep an eye on her healing. And while she was in pain, the potion Lucas had given her, after he had helped her onto the bed, had helped a lot. "We don't have to play dolls if you don't want to, Lila." She remarked finally, tilting her head when the younger girl merely shrugged. Lila had yet to say anything to either of them that afternoon. Something felt off.
Rose knocked on the open door way, holding a tray of snacks and juice for the young preteens. "I thought ya'll might enjoy a snack." She stated cheerfully, stepping into the room and setting it on a movable table. She moved it beside the bed, turning to look at the three silent girls. They were never this quiet. Emma and Mia looked almost concerned. "What's wrong?"
Emma hesitated, glancing at Rose before turning her eyes back to Lila. The younger girl kept making her doll dance in a circle. Usually Lila was happy and excited to be with them and she always tried to joined their play, even if sometimes she wasn't sure how to play. "I don't know." She replied quietly, meeting
Mia's eyes once more before glancing at Rose again. Maybe the older girl could help them figure out what was wrong with Lila.
She frowned, spotting Lila's doll. "Do you want me to fix your doll, Lila?" She questioned, tilting her head at how fast the child shook her head. "Hey Lila, can you look at me please?" She coaxed quietly. It took a minute but Lila finally looked over at her and she had to fight down a gasp. The girl's eye looked bruised... "Emma, go get Lucas please." She ordered quietly, crouching so that she was on the child's level. "Where's your doll's head Lila? In your pocket? Why is it there?" She focused on the little girl for a moment, not wanting to touch her. The child had tapped her pocket before looking away from her. She had a bad feeling about this.
"But Rose! I can't." Emma protested, glancing toward the door. She was allowed out into the infirmary now but with her bracelet on the door would shock her. She knew it was to keep her from getting upset and going off somewhere, because her magic would lash out, it didn't matter where she was. But she couldn't take the bracelet off, an adult had to.
That was right. She turned quickly, gently taking hold of the small wrist and removing the band from it. "Now go please!"
She nodded, scrambling over the bed railing and out the door. "Lucas!"
She snorted, shaking her head. She could have done that but she knew Lucas wasn't in the main infirmary, he was in his office. Doing paperwork, apparently. "Mia, can you scoot as far back as you can for me?" She asked quietly, lowering one bar so she could reach the younger girl easily if necessary. "Lila, can you tell me what's going on?"
She shook her head, gritting her teeth for a moment before smacking her doll into the bed. She couldn't talk about it. She wasn't allowed to. Not that he had said that, but that had always been the rules at home. She knew it had been an accident, though. He hadn't know she was there at first, she had followed him. Because Derek wouldn't tell her what was wrong with Aria. So she was mad at both of them.. She slammed her doll down again, hissing and trying to pull away when a gentle hand took hers.
"Lila? It's Lucas. Can you look at me for a moment?" He inquired calmly, keeping hold of her wrist. He had known, when Emma had come barreling into his office that something was wrong. The only word the out of breath child had said was Lila's name. And the fact that Rose was watching the child so carefully, he had known something was up. To see the child act like this though, he had an idea what might be happening but he wasn't quite sure why.
She jerked, trying to pull her hand away. She kicked her leg out, not bothering to look where she was kicking. At the squeak, she glanced at her friends, realizing suddenly that she had hit Mia instead of Lucas. She didn't want to hurt Mia. Mia was her friend! Mia and Emma were her first friends! She didn't want to harm them! She didn't want to be her parents! She screeched, slamming her free hand into Lucas. "IEEK!"
"Rose, let's get Mia and Emma out of hitting reach." He stated calmly, nodding when the teenager quickly lifted Mia up and placed the girl back into her chair.
She gestured for the two younger girls to move back toward her. She crouched down, checking Mia for injuries. She then moved so that she was on the preteens level, wrapping an arm around each girl. Both of them looked scared for their friend. "Her eyes, Lucas."
Lucas sat down on the bed, releasing the child's wrist for a moment. When she went to hit him again, he captured both of her wrists, keeping a strong but gentle hold of them. "I know you don't want to talk to me but can you look at me for a minute please?" He requested, ignoring the feet that had started kicking him as the little girl tried to wiggle away. He just kept hold of her wrists, waiting patiently. After several minutes, young eyes met his and he suddenly knew exactly why Rose had called him. Instead of the blue that they normally were, Lila's eyes were almost black and she had the beginnings of a bruise over one eye. "Who hit you, Lila?" He asked softly, grimacing when she kicked him again. He had a feeling this was going to become a full blown kicking and screaming meltdown if he didn't get her settled quickly. Even though the child hadn't been tested yet, he was quite certain the she had autism. He was also certain that she was very upset and frustrated. "I know you are upset but I won't hurt you. I promise." He murmured quietly, using his free hand to pin down the kicking leg. He released it after a moment, wrapping an arm around her waist and quickly lifting the child to sit on his lap. He was going to need bruise balm when this was over. He quickly wrapped one of his legs around hers before catching her flailing hands again. It took a moment but he finally had her restrained so that she wouldn't harm either of them. Now he just had to get the shrieking girl calm. "I need you to calm down, Lila. You are okay. You are safe here." He murmured, keeping his voice low and soothing.
"IEEEK." She shrieked, arching her back and wiggling. She didn't want to calm down! She was angry! Couldn't he understand that? She just want to be left ALONE! She slammed her head back into his chest, giving off another angry shriek.
He sighed softly, letting the smallest amount of calming magic flow into the child, rocking with her to the best of his ability. He winced when her teeth found his arm, being careful to not jerk away. He didn't want to hurt her, after all. "I know you are angry, Lila. But I need you to take a few deep breaths for me." He murmured calmly, keeping hold of the child. She wasn't the first child he had had to restrain to calm down; he had done this enough that her struggles didn't throw him off. He had expected them actually, he just had to be careful that he didn't use too much strength in his holds.
She struggled for a couple minutes more but she was getting tired. And the hold he had on her was almost comforting, it was almost like a bear hug. She gave a softer shriek, stopping her wiggling for a moment, even as she slammed her head into his chest again. She took a deep breath feeling the calm from his magic. But she didn't want to be calm! She wanted to be angry! Because they had promised! But she couldn't fight the calm any longer. She was so very tired. She bumped her head against his chest again, resting it there this time.
He relaxed his grip but didn't release the child just yet. "Can you tell me what's wrong, Lila?" He asked quietly, fighting a smile when she tried to tug her hands from his hold. He knew that wasn't her trying to fight him. That was her wanting to communicate. He shifted her slightly so that he would be able to see her hands better before gently releasing his grip on them.
-Mad-
"Can you tell me why?"
She touched her eye, biting her lip for a moment. -Hurt.- She hated that she couldn't speak like her friends, that she only had a few words she could force her mouth to say. But even if she had the words, she wasn't sure she would have told him the truth. Because she didn't want her cousin to get in trouble, it had been an accident.
He sighed softly, his hand itching to heal the bruising. He had to wait to heal it, he wanted her permission for one, and he needed to know how she got it first. "How did that happen?"He asked quietly, raising an eyebrow when she rapidly shook her head even as her hands told him that she couldn't say. "You can't tell me? That's okay. Can I guess?"
She hesitated, turning that over for a moment. She was still upset with Derek but she didn't want Lucas to get mad at him. That was her job. Aria would get mad if she found out that Derek had hurt her. But it was an accident! Could she talk about accidents? She finally nodded, meeting his eyes for a second before looking away.
"Was it an adult? No? Was it another student?" He waited a moment, frowning when she nodded this time. He had figured it wasn't an adult at the camp but he had needed to sure. He had a feeling he knew who had hit her. "Was it your cousin?"
-Accident! Didn't mean to!- She signed rapidly, glaring at her feet. She knew he really hadn't meant to hurt her, he hadn't even know she was there.
"It was an accident?" Even if it was, he knew she was still angry at her cousin.
She nodded, leaning into him for a moment before pulling back so that she could sign easier. -I follow. Startle. He elbow.- She explained, furrowing her brows for a moment. She had followed him because he wouldn't tell her what was wrong with Aria, even though she kept asking. When he had started hitting a tree, she had touched his back. He had jerked his elbow back into her before spinning around. When Derek saw that it was her, he got upset. Because he had hurt her. But it wasn't on purpose, so maybe he hadn't broken his promise. -Accident.-
"I see. Was he upset that he hurt you?" He inquired, hoping that he was. If it had truly been an accident and she had surprised him, he could see Derek jabbing an elbow back if he thought he was in danger. These children lived flight-or-fight for so much of their lives that it was hard to turn off. He would have to send a message to Derek's counselors and healer, because the child was bond to be very upset he hurt the little girl. He had seen how careful Derek and Ariana were with the young preteen.
She nodded, her eyes fluttering. She was so very tired now and she just wanted to take a nap. -Sleepy-
"It's alright, Lila. You can sleep now. " He murmured, knowing the child was already starting to drift. But she wasn't heavy and he could easily stand with her and move her to another bed. He turned his eyes away from the child on his lap to the two talking quietly to Rose. He knew from their expressions that Rose had calmed them but it wouldn't hurt to reassure them further. "She is okay now." He remarked quietly, giving the preteens a reassuring smile when they turned to him.
"Who hurt her?"
He sighed softly, shaking his head. "She startled her cousin. He didn't know she was behind him and he threw his elbow back. From what Lila said, he didn't mean to harm her." He responded, eyes lingering on Rose for a long moment. He had heard, after all, what she had done to Derek for merely talking to her friend and he didn't need a vengeful teenager going after him for an accident.
Emma nodded, glancing at the sleeping younger girl for a moment. She understood being startled and reacting on instinct, after all. That was how she had ended up here, as she was remembering more and more of what happened now. "Lila can sleep in my bed. If you'll enlarge the chair, I decided to show Mia some of my school books." She commented quietly, moving away from Rose and toward the armchair. They were getting used to Lila's reactions, after all, even if they still caught them off guard sometimes. And they still made her worry for the younger girl. She wasn't quite sure how she would handle a full, noisy castle in a few weeks. But then, she also wasn't sure how she, herself, was going to handle it, with the amount of magic now within her. Emma only wished that summer wasn't almost over.
-x-
While he hadn't be quite sure where he was going, as long as it was away from Eric's office and the camp, he had certainly not thought he would find a very upset teenage boy. One who was refusing to speak to him. "Derek, you know you can talk to me. I just want to help." He repeated, sighing softly when the child scuffed.
"You can't help. You can't fix this." Derek grimaced, eyes focused on the tree he had been punching when Henry had found him. Not that he would let the man look at his hand, no matter how much he pressed. He deserved this pain. He had acted just like his father. He didn't want to be his father! Or his uncle! He just wanted to be himself, to figure out who exactly he could be. Was that too much to ask?
"May I at least check your hand?" He asked again, eyeing the torn and bleeding limb. The child had been doing so much better, had been talking to him and his healer. His temper had been calmer and he stopped the bullying. But since his cousin had come close to suicide, he had been closed off; angry. As if he blamed himself. "You do know that Ariana's actions are not your fault, don't you?" He inquired after a few minutes of silence. He wasn't so sure that the boy did.
"I know that. She even told me it wasn't my fault. But my own actions are! Isn't that what you've been trying to teach me? It's my fault!" He shouted, jumping up from the bench and pacing the courtyard for a few moments. When Henry made no move to follow or stop him, he relaxed slightly. This was Henry, after all. The man had never hurt him before, had never treated him like he wasn't worth his time. He just was so upset with himself. He hadn't known she was there! And he had just reacted! But did that make him his father? He had hurt her, just like his father had hurt him. But he hadn't meant it.
"What's your fault, Derek?"
"I hit Lila!" He snapped, slamming his hand into one of the trees again. The pain burned into his mind but he deserved it. Right? Ariana would kill him if she knew. They had made a promise to each other that they would protect Lila, at all costs. He had broken that.
He blinked, taking a slow deep breath. Because the child could mean anything. He would be surprised if Derek had purposely harmed the young girl but that didn't mean it couldn't happen. The teenager was very protective if that little girl; hell, pretty much everyone there that summer was protective of that child. He just couldn't see him harming her on purpose. Because while he could be a bully, he tended to bully with his words and only get physical with the older boys. And he had pretty much stopped all of that. "You hit Lila?"
"Yes!" He swung his fist into the tree again, grimacing at the sudden sharp pain. He gasped, biting his lip and flinching violently when a hand gently caught his wrist.
"Let me see that, Derek." He murmured quietly, scanning the child's hand quickly with his eyes. It looked like he had fractured it. "May I cast a diagnostic charm on your hand?"
He shook his head, trying to tug away. "I deserve the pain."
"Why?"
"Because I hurt her! I didn't mean to but I did! I'm just like my father!" He shouted, wincing when he tried to pull his hand away again. It hurt like hell. But he deserved the pain. His father had been right. He was a monster just like him.
Henry closed his eyes for a moment, fighting down the rage that threatened to over-power him. He wasn't angry at the teenager and if he let his anger show, the boy would think that it was directed at him. He gently rested his free hand on the boy's shoulder, carefully nudging him toward the bench. "Repeat what you just said for me." He requested softly, putting a small amount of pressure on the boy's shoulder, encouraging him to sit.
Derek sat down, frowning when the healer crouched in front of him and turned his hand over. "I hurt Lila." He repeated. He didn't understand how that would help. If anything, it made him feel guiltier.
"After that."
"I didn't mean to but...I didn't mean to?"
"You didn't mean to." He reinforced firmly, shaking his head. "Derek, was it an accident?" He questioned quietly, keeping his eyes focused on the battered hand, hoping that would make the child more comfortable.
He furrowed his brows, tilting his head to the side. It had been an accident. He had been boxing with the tree and she had tapped his back. He had thrown his elbow back in defense and spun around with his fists raised. When she cowered away from him... "She was scared of me. Because I hurt her. She came up behind me and she's so quiet, I just reacted." He felt a tear roll down his cheek, quickly closing his eyes.
"Do you know what sets you apart from your father Derek? No? He meant to harm you. You didn't want to hurt Lila. The instinct that has kept you alive for fifteen years thought you were in danger. Your body responded before your mind could catch up. You might have noticed that that happens a lot at the camp." Henry explained quietly, slowly drawing his wand and raising an eyebrow at the teen in question. When the boy nodded, he drew it carefully along his hand, frowning at the results. He had been right, it was fractured.
The blond frowned in thought, turning that over in his head. He knew there were others at the camp, especially in Ariana's group sessions, who reacted to unexpected touch by lashing out. They had all gotten a bit better since coming to the camp, but if they were startled, they still hit first and asked questions later. Just like he did. Just like Ariana had done when he had startled her. He would apologize to Lila again, because he knew she was probably still upset, and while he had hurt her, it was really an accident. He wasn't becoming his father. Because he didn't want to be like that man, he didn't have to spout his bigotry and hatred any longer. But now that he wasn't angry at himself, his hand really hurt.
He sighed softly, giving up the search in his pockets. He didn't have his healer kit on him, so while he could heal the boy's hand, he didn't have the ointment, tweezers, or wraps that he needed. Which meant they needed to head to the medical wing. "I don't have what I need to fix your hand, Derek. Will you come to the infirmary with me?" He inquired softly. If the boy wouldn't, he'd just go grab what he needed and come back. But he had hope that the boy would, even though he knew at least one of his cousins was up there. If not both, since it was one of the days Mia came for her potion treatments.
Derek hesitated before finally nodding. He could talk to Ariana, at least, and tell her what happened. He wasn't sure what they would do if Lila stayed afraid of him. It would make Ariana's infirmary stay much harder on all three of them, since he had been taking care of Lila. He had even brushed the little girl's hair this morning, after she had thrown the brush at Rani. He waited for the healer to stand before standing carefully. Even though he saw the healer's movements, he still flinched when Henry wrapped an arm around his shoulder. Comfort was something that he still wasn't really used to.
-x-
She watched her brother for a long moment, as he jumped and twisted, before turning back to her book. Karrie was stretched out on Harry's bed, a pillow propped behind her back and one under her leg. "If you break it, Remus won't buy you another." She remarked, flipping the page in the newest detective book in the series. It was a mundane series and it happened to be one of her favourite. Remus had bought it and several other books for her, since she was going to be on crutches for at least another week, when he had brought home the miniature trampoline for Harry. Which her brother had yet to stop bouncing on.
"Remus charmed it not to break." He shrugged, twisting again. Severus and Remus had cast several charms over the trampoline as they were putting it together. Remus had promised that they would get a real trampoline for their house but for right now, this worked. He couldn't do all the tricks he wanted on here. It wasn't really big enough for flips or certain tricks, but he still like it. He liked bouncing just as much as he liked running, climbing, and flying. While he knew that Karrie couldn't bounce right now, because of her cast, he didn't understand why she preferred reading to running and jumping. He liked to read comics, sure, but he also preferred to be moving. He liked being active.
"Don't mess with the spells on it, okay?"
He rolled his eyes, glancing over at his twin. "I already promised Remus and Severus that I wouldn't."
She snorted, shaking her head. "They're adults, we both know that it is easy to break a promise you didn't mean to adults." Even if she knew that neither of them wanted to break a promise to those two men.
He shrugged, eyeing the distance to the bed. He was almost sure he could make it with a good leap from the trampoline. He bounced a little higher, focusing on the foot of the bed. He gave a final bounce, jumping toward the bed and crashing into the end of it. He groaned, rolling onto his back for a moment. Well, he had made it to the bed, just not on the bed.
"Severus is coming." Karrie warned, glancing up to make sure all of his limbs were still attached before turning back to her book. She was used to Harry's stunts so if he wasn't bleeding and his limbs were attached, she no longer bothered to get up. It helped that she knew, although she wasn't quite sure how, that he was only a bit bruised. He had known when she had fallen and broken her leg further and she knew when he managed to skin his knees and knock himself around. But they were twins, now, so she thought that might have something to do with it.
He sighed, knocking on the door softly for a moment before opening it. He had a feeling that was Harry. They had spelled the trampoline so that the child couldn't jump through it, but not so he couldn't jump off. If they did get one of the full sized ones, he was going to attach a net...and a tethering spell to Harry. Maybe a height limiting spell? And one so he couldn't break his neck. Maybe he should just spell all the floors to act like mats. "Are you alright, Harry?" He inquired calmly, assessing the child with his eyes. He seemed a little disoriented and probably a little bruised, but not really hurt. Which, with this child, wasn't unusual. Harry tended to get himself into all kinds of situations where he ended up with bruises or skinned knees, but always seemed to manage to escape serious injury. Unlike his sister. But then, Karrie's bones were a lot more fragile than Harry's.
Harry shrugged, getting back up and on the trampoline. "I'm okay." He started bouncing again, glancing at Severus and deciding against the next twist he wanted to try for the moment. He had a feeling that the professor would think it was risky and he didn't want to upset him
"Try not to crack open your skull, alright?" He admonished, shaking his head. Severus was well aware that the preteen tended to like anything that he thought was dangerous. He was just happy the boy hadn't asked for a skateboard yet. Not the he would be getting one, not until his body was healthy. While Harry's bones weren't as fragile as Karrie's, he didn't break them from just falling, his bones were still soft from malnutrition. And while the potions the entire camp had spiked into their juice helped, it would take time for any of their bodies to heal completely.
She snorted, turning another page. Harry would probably try to do just that. "Don't worry, I won't let him."
He rolled his eyes and kept bouncing. Karrie would probably throw some magic out to catch him if he tried that, although she never seemed able to do that when she was falling. "I won't." He gave Severus what he would consider an innocent smile, smirking when the older man merely shook his head and left their room. He jumped and twisted, trying to manage the double twist with only one bounce. He wasn't quite there yet, but he knew with practice, he would be able to do it. It did still shock him that the two men cared this much about them. It wasn't even that they got him a trampoline, which Remus had said was to help him burn off some of his 'excess energy'. It was that they cared enough to make sure he was safe using it, that he didn't get hurt. He had started to think of them as their dads, because he was more sure of their concern and love for them now. He just wasn't sure how his parents would have felt about that.
"Stop thinking so hard."
"I'm not!"
"You stopped bouncing. You stop moving when you overthink." She retorted, glancing up at him with a frown. She wasn't quite sure what was bothering her brother, but she would rather his magic not start reacting to it. Harry tended to lose control when he was upset, just as she did sometimes. But the extra magic in the air would hurt and she couldn't even escape from it.
"Karrie...do you think that my parents would care if I, well if, you know..I don't know." He grimaced, smacking his hand into his head. He cared about Severus and Remus and he was almost certain that he did love them like they were his parents but he didn't want his real parents to hate him for finding someone else.
She hesitated, setting her book aside and tapping the space beside her on the bed. She waited for her brother to come over and sit beside her before gently taking his hand and squeezing. "I think...I think your parents would want someone to love and support you like they would have if they were alive. I don't think they'd be mad that an adult cares about you or that you are starting to care for them too." She replied quietly, meeting his eyes for a long moment.
"I just don't want them to hate me."
"They won't." She was certain of that. Remus and Severus had both owled old friends and managed to get photos of Harry's parents and him as a baby, which they had added to the album Hagrid had made for him. The people in those photos always had the biggest smiles when they were holding Harry. His parents loved him and they were taken from him. "It's okay to want what Severus and Remus are offering. I want it too." She added softly, eyes focusing on the galloping unicorn on her cast. His parents had wanted him, hers had not. But now Severus and Remus wanted both of them and while she was just as uncertain of how long that would last as Harry was, she wanted it to last. She wanted to be Severus and Remus'.
He nodded, squeezing her hand. What she said made sense. He knew that they had loved him and he guessed that they would want him to be happy. He just never really knew them but he didn't want to betray them by wanting what Severus and Remus were offering. Maybe there was a way for him to have Severus and Remus and still honor his parents. It was something to think about anyway. But right now, right now he felt like bouncing again. He squeezed his sister's hand again before letting go with a grin and bounding off the bed, back to his trampoline.
She gave a half smile, shaking her head. Back to normal, then.
-x-
"Let me see, Lucas."
"I'm going to put bruise balm on it." He argued, although he was sure that the older healer already knew that.
"And the ones on your back?" Eric inquired, raising an eyebrow as he folded his arms across his chest and leaned back against his desk. While Lila's meltdown wasn't unexpected, he knew how much those little hands and feet could hurt. Not to mention the bite marks he could see on Lucas' arm. "Tim had to help me after my last encounter with those little hands and feet. And if I remember correctly, Henry routinely corners Jake and covers his back with balm."
He sighed softly, grimacing. He knew Eric had a point but the scars on his chest made him feel uncomfortable; even his own healer had never seen them. He did know that there was at least a head-sized bruise on his chest and stomach from that little girl. "Is she still hitting Jake?"
"Only when she's angry, upset, frustrated, overwhelmed, or wanting his attention. So, at least once a day." Jake had taken to caring for Lila during the days while Ariana was in the medical wing. Which meant he was carrying the child on his back or his chest, so there were days when she was hitting and kicking him in the back or stomach. He did know why the slightly younger man was fighting this, besides healers being the worse patients, of course. "You are safe here, Lucas. You should know by now that I won't judge you for your scars. It's not like we've been working together for years or anything." He added quietly, meeting Lucas' eyes when they jumped to his.
How did Eric know he had scars on his chest? They worked in the same field and had spent about six or seven years working together but he knew the man had never seen them. He didn't let anyone see them and he rarely ever talked about them, although he did know that he had told Eric and Tim about his ex. He just hadn't thought he had told them about the scars. "Did I tell you about them?" He frowned at the nod, tilting his head. "Was I drunk?"
"You were upset. It was six years ago at a New Years Eve party for the Pediatric healers." He sighed softly, shaking his head. "I just want to check the bruising, Lucas, and make sure she didn't accidentally bruise a rib. She might be little and underweight but she has quite the punch when she's upset."
He hesitated for a moment before sighing softly. Eric was a healer, just like him. What's more, he trusted Eric. He also remembered that party now that Eric had mentioned it and why, exactly, he had been upset enough to tell the one thing he tended to keep hidden. He had shrugged his robe off when he had come into Eric's office to tell him about Lila's meltdown after he had her calm, so now he carefully pulled his shirt over his head, flinching when a hand touched the middle of his largest scar, right where a little head had slammed into it over and over again.
He paused, keeping his hand still until he felt Lucas take another breath. "Lila head-butted you good." He commented quietly, turning to pick up the jar of bruise balm he had pulled out when Lucas had started his story. Any story with Lila and meltdown in it would need bruise balm and Lucas clearly did. He wasn't certain that there wasn't a bruised rib as large as the bruise was blooming. It had only been a few hours, so the bruises hadn't fully developed yet. Which was good, the balm would work faster that way. "Do you mind if I apply this and check your ribs?" He asked, keeping his eyes locked on Lucas' until the other healer nodded. He carefully rested his hand back on the bruise again, letting his magic sink down into Lucas' skin and quickly using it to examine his ribs. There was one rib that had slight bruising but he knew it would make Lucas uncomfortable the longer it was left unattended. He gently let his magic surround the rib, allowing it to slowly heal the bruising before drawing his magic back out of the younger healer. He then opened the jar of balm, carefully spreading it over the bruise and scars. He knew why Lucas didn't like people seeing his scars because that New Years Eve party had ended not long after he had found an upset Lucas in the courtyard and decided that to make Lucas feel safe that he was going home with him and Tim that night. The largest scar ran from just below his shoulder blade, down his chest at an angle to right below his rib cage.
"She took a job at the hospital. I...they offered me your job to get me to stay but I'd rather heal than work administration." He remarked quietly, closing his eyes for a moment. He had always felt safe when he worked with Eric and he knew that Eric would understand quite well why he hadn't jumped at that opportunity. The pay was a hell of a lot better there but for his mental health, he couldn't work with that woman.
He had thought, for the last few years, that the woman was stalking Lucas but the man had always denied it. She certainly wouldn't be following him here, he wouldn't hire her. Not to work with children, not to work with anyone. She had applied a few times at the children's hospital but he had always rejected it. The hospital must have been desperate, losing him, Tim, and Lucas, although all three of them had offered to fill in as needed and still saw their personal patients. He'd have to send their acting head a note about her. Any person who harmed their spouse, or ex-spouse in Lucas' case, like that should not be healing anyone. He finished applying the balm to his chest, motioning for him to turn so he could apply it to his back. "It isn't really worth the pay, although it does certainly pay more than we can." He responded, sighing at the spattering of bruises he could see starting to form. "We really need to teach Lila not to hit."
"She has autism, Eric. She gets frustrated, she reacts. Her reaction just happens to be hitting. At least she isn't hitting herself." Lucas shrugged, feeling his muscles relax slightly as the bruise balm was massaged in. He knew he wouldn't have been able to reach some of those spots on his own.
He shook his head, applying the balm to the last bruise before gently tapping Lucas' shoulder and stepping back. He waited for the man to turn around, eyeing the teeth marks he could see. "Did you clean those?"
"Not yet."
Eric sighed, moving to one of the cabinets in his office. He placed the bruise balm on a shelf before grabbing a bottle of rubbing alcohol. "If her primary school had wanted to they could have helped her; they had the resources in place for children with autism. Now, we have a young preteen entering a new school who cannot verbally communicate, who cannot handle loud noises or large crowds. There's no plan in place for her, nothing that has been done at her primary school that we can implement here." He summed a cloth, dabbing it with the rubbing alcohol before gently running it over the bite marks on Lucas' arm. He knew Lucas, and Alexis, were just as frustrated as he was about Lila's situation. The child went for testing next week. They were already trying to get some sort of plan in place for the girl but it was proving to be difficult.
Lucas grimaced at the sting, knowing that it would kill any germs or infections. It was the most effective for minor wounds but that didn't mean he liked it. "She needs a one on one." He commented, slipping his shirt back over his head when Eric stepped back again.
"Remus suggested the same thing, he used to work as one at a primary school. It might be difficult finding one in the magical world." It was a good idea , it was just finding a suitable one on one that might be the problem, although he thought Jake might be a good choice to look into.
"We'll find something that work, Eric. Until then, Severus might want to make extra bruise balm." Lucas joked, settling down into an armchair and reaching for a cup of tea. They both could use a good cup of tea, after all.
-x-
After he had finished healing Derek and the teenager had wander to where his cousin was, he turned toward Lucas. The slightly older man had been watching him for several minutes and it was a bit disconcerting. While he didn't think Eric would have told Lucas exactly what was going on, he knew that the other man might have picked up on it.
"He's in his office. It would be easier for you if you went to him, instead of the other way around." Lucas commented, moving from where he had been standing. Once Henry had finished using one of the small examination rooms, the man had wondered onto the main floor. He had used the excuse of restocking his healer's bag, but Henry wasn't fooling him. The younger man kept sending looks at Eric's door and he didn't even have his healer's bag with him. He also knew what the younger man did for a living. While he wasn't a mind-healer, he could see the toil it was taking on the younger man.
He grimaced, shooting a glare at Lucas. He took a deep breath, locking his shields firmly in place before steeling his will and moving to Eric's door. He hesitated, taking another deep breath before knocking on it. If the man didn't answer, he could just say he tried. After all, he didn't think the man was on duty at the moment so it wouldn't be his fault if the man decided not to get the door.
Eric glanced at the door, raising an eyebrow at the color of the light. Lucas had filled him in on what had happened with Lila while he had been out looking for a wayward healer, so he knew it wouldn't be Lucas unless something had happened. But the other man would have just called him with his pendant if he had more than he could handle. The light, however, indicated that it was a counselor or healer, and not a student or Alexis. "Come."
He hesitated for another moment before slowly opening the door and stepping inside. He bit his lip when Eric merely raised an eyebrow at him, dropping his eyes to the floor.
"Sit." He ordered quietly, dark eyes focused on the younger man. While Henry's mask would fool many, it looked to him like the younger healer was about to break down. Which was why he had not wanted the young man to wait any longer. He needed to release his emotions, safely, before they exploded. If that happened around one of the students, it could cause serious damage to the healing of that student.
"I...can we just..if-"
"Sit down, Henry. You are not in charge in here." He ordered briskly, meeting blue eyes when they flew to him. It took a moment for the young man to obey but eventually he gave in.
Henry shook his head, sinking down into the chair. He really didn't want to do this. It wasn't necessary. He could force his emotions to go back down, he could lock them in. He remembered exactly what his last healer had said to him, after all. He could control his emotions. He had to.
He observed the other man for a long moment, shaking his head. When he had talked to Henry's previous healer, he had been less than pleased. That healer would be answering to the board, as he was reporting it. Talking to Henry's old master, however, was much more useful. From what his master had said, Henry had been really good at going to his healers and letting his shields down. Until now, until this last healer. And since he wasn't sure when Henry had last let down his shields fully, like he needed to so that he could keep control of emotions, he knew what he might have to do. He had to get Henry to drop his shields and he wasn't sure he could verbally convince him that he was safe here. "When was the last time you actually let your shields down?"
"I told you, the end of May." He answered, grimacing slightly. That was the truth, after all. He had let them down in May, that had been what had finally pushed his healer into quitting. It didn't matter that it had been accidental, that he couldn't keep them up any longer. He hadn't fully dropped his shields since last December and he knew that he needed to. It was just hard to release that control now. He had been close to firing his healer when the man had quit. Hell, he knew he should have fired him in the first month.
He ignored the attitude, knowing that Henry literally couldn't help it right now. "Let me be more specific then. When was the last time you fully gave up your control and let yourself feel?" He inquired, sighing softly when the younger healer looked away from him. He knew that what Henry did as a living was difficult and emotionally draining. That was why that type of mind-healers were rare and they had to have iron control over their own emotions. How else would he be able to notice the slightest change in a student's behaviour, if he didn't force his own feelings about that behaviour down. Henry's job wasn't easy and he was suppose to have a mind-healer that he could let down his barriers around, that he could feel around, to keep him sane. From the younger man's reaction, though, he could guess the answer to his own question and that didn't make him happy. "That long, huh?"
"December." He whispered, not looking up at the dark-skinned healer. He didn't want to see his reaction.
He closed his eyes, forcing down his own anger. No wonder Henry had been so enraged about Jake that he struggled to control it. No wonder his rage had overpowered him earlier. He was surprised his emotions hadn't overpowered him before this. That would make his job so much harder. Because he was almost sure now that he was going to have to force the younger man to drop his shields. "I need you to release your control, Henry. It has been way too long, you know this." He responded briskly.
He huffed, shaking his head. He knew this but it was so much harder than it sounded. He had held control for so long now that he wasn't even sure he wanted to feel the emotions he had been locking in. His last healer had told him quite clearly that he was weak for needing to release the built up emotions, he was weak because he couldn't control the release. He had never had a healer tell him that before and at first he at brushed it off, but the man had gotten angry at him every time he tried to follow the same exercises past healers had used with him. He should have left immediately, he knew that. But it was so hard to find a healer who could handle it and he had been working long shifts then...he had finally just decided that he was old enough to be able to control it. That he would be fine. He knew better but he still tried to fight it. To not give in. To not feel.
"Look at me." He waited a few minutes until blue eyes finally met his. "Take a deep breath and hold it in. Good. Now release. And again." He directed calmly, keeping his tone firm. He could see the conflict in Henry's eyes and he did understand. The young man had forced his emotions down for so long that the initial release would feel awful. But that's why he was there, to ground him. To keep him from drifting too far away.
Henry took another deep breath, holding it to the silent count of ten before releasing it. Pause for ten seconds, breath in. Hold, and breath out. The pattern was calming, it was familiar, it was almost relaxing. He kept breathing, listening to Eric's deep voice. Honestly, the older man would make a good healer for him. He knew that. He just wasn't sure he wanted to let go, he didn't want to feel the hurricane of emotions that would hit him. For he knew exactly where the breathing was leading to. It wasn't his first rodeo, after all.
"Now, as you breath out, feel your body slowly relax. Breath in. Let your mind relax. Breath out, feel your limbs relax. And in as your barriers slowly withdraw." He instructed, keeping his voice soft for the moment. He frowned suddenly, tilting his head. He had seen Henry's body slowly relax and he was sure his mind was starting to drift, but his barriers were still firmly up, still locked in place. "Breath out. Let your mind calm. And in, as your mind relaxes."
He felt his body relax but he was trying to fight, trying to keep his barriers up. His mind drifted into relaxation for a moment, his shield started to slip and the feeling that hit him made him slam his barriers back up. He could still hear Eric's instructions and while he did breath in, he held it, shoving that emotion as far down as he could.
"Stop holding your breath, Henry. Breath out." He ordered, eyes focused intently on the younger healer. He was still holding his breath. Shit. "Henry. Henry!" He gave a soft sigh of relief when his eyes snapped back to him and he released the breath he had been holding. "Listen to my voice."
He tried, he really did. But a part of him was fighting it and he couldn't force that down. He keep breathing; he also kept part of his body still tense, still unwilling to give in.
So that wasn't going to work, then. Not if Henry kept fighting it. Of the dozens of exercises that popped into his mind, he dismissed almost all of them. He finally decided on one, standing slowly so that he didn't startle Henry. "Alright, I want you to do something for me. Stand up, please." He ordered.
He groaned, obeying quickly. He had a feeling that he knew this exercise and he wasn't so sure he would be able to fight it. Or if he wanted to fight it. If it was what he was thinking, it was one that always made him relax, always made him feel safe.
He moved silently, coming to stand behind Henry. He placed his hands on the younger man's shoulders, knowing that this would only work if the younger man trusted him. The fact that he didn't pull away was a good start. "Close your eyes." He ordered softly, waiting a few moments before continuing. "Start at your feet. Tense and relax them. Feel the tension leave them. Good. Now feel your ankles. Feel how your weight rests of them. Feel them tense and relax. Good.
Now feel your shins.."
Henry listened to the soft instructions, tensing and relaxing the body parts Eric named. He could feel the comfort of the older healer's hands on his shoulders, the weight of them. He kept tensing and relaxing until he reached his arms, tensing but not relaxing those muscles. A small, a very small, part of him still wanted to fight it and he was getting too close to his head for comfort. Because even though he could feel his shields relaxing now, he knew that he would start feeling when he started relaxing and tensing the muscles in his face. And it had been so long, he wasn't sure he wanted to feel that right now.
"Relax your arm muscles, Henry. Relax. Feel the tension leave them, let that feeling fill you." He instructed quietly, gently squeezing the younger man's shoulder. If he could just get him to stop fighting him... but that was easier said than done. "Don't fight it, Henry. Let the calm fill you. That's it. Feel your shoulders tense and relax. Good."
He was trying, he really was. Letting his body relax, letting the calm fill him, that was easy. But every time he felt an emotion start to drift past his shield, he'd tense, forcing it back. As he slowly relaxed the muscles in his cheeks and then his temple, he felt a particularly strong emotion and he slammed his shields back up, feeling his entire body tense. He jerked away from the gentle grasp on his shoulders, trying to lock his mind back down. He couldn't feel, he couldn't do this. "I can't do this Eric."
"Yes, you can. You have to stop fighting it." He responded firmly. He didn't move back to the younger man, letting him have his space for the moment. He had feared they would end up here and as much as he knew that would work, he didn't want Henry to come to depend on that to release his emotions. Although he didn't think the young man would. Once he had released control and he had managed to get him through the overpowering emotions, he knew that it would be easier the next time. Because Henry had been holding control for too long. Instead of releasing his control weekly, it had been months, which was what was making this harder. Because the longer it went, the stronger the buried emotions became, the more power they had. "Do you trust me?"
-x-