Title: The Seven Year Itch
Author: MindyH
Chapter: 4
See part one for disclaimer and spoilers etc.
"So, what happened?"
Kate looked up, her head spinning weakly with the movement. She'd had too many drinks to be having this conversation. They both had. She swirled the ice in her once again empty glass. She'd finished yet another and had lost count of how many that now made.
They weren't exactly drunk but Gibbs had plied her with enough drink to significantly loosen her tongue and diminish her reserve. She pushed the glass forward, watching the condensation make a wet path across the wood.
They'd done away with the small talk fairly quickly, like where McGee and Tony were now and what they were up to. They briefly discussed the case before Gibbs had promptly turned more personal.
She hadn't gone into this with a particular approach in mind. And she hadn't actually decided how honest she wanted to get with her former boss. But his purposeful gaze and persistent questions were slowly undoing the last of her fledgling reticence.
But then, she never could lie to him anyway. Even now, there was no one she trusted more and the alcohol she'd willingly ingested only provided ample justification for her to indulge the sort of personal attention she had always craved from him but rarely received.
"I could blame it on work," she replied quietly after a long pause.
Gibbs hummed slightly and waited for her to continue. Kate lowered her gaze to the tabletop, tracing the wet trail of condensation with the tip of one finger.
"But that would only be half the truth," she admitted slowly.
Gibbs put his head to one side: "What would be the rest?"
She met his eyes briefly and shrugged vaguely, reflecting on her spouse of six years and feeling her eyes threaten to tear. Occasionally that still happened -- not often -- but something about Gibbs' tone and eyes affected her acutely. She quickly squelched the emotion before it took hold.
"I guess…" she began, shaking herself and taking a deep breath. She rested her elbows on the table, clasping her palms together before continuing with a voice that faltered: "Truth is, Brad and I never… really loved each other."
She couldn't meet Gibbs' eyes when she spoke. It had been painful enough just to acknowledge that simple truth to herself when she finally filed for divorce, let alone someone whose opinion mattered to her so much.
"Not truly…" she added distantly with a wistful sigh: "Not -- not enough,"
Kate had convinced herself, in hindsight, that whatever issues of money and work and children and family she and Brad had could have been resolved if their love had been stronger. She couldn't even fully fathom the magnitude of her own extreme regret in confessing to her family, to her friends, to herself and to this man in front of her that she had simply and stupidly married the wrong man.
Gibbs sighed heavily: "It's not an easy thing to admit," he murmured carefully.
She met his eyes finally and unreservedly, wondering if he was speaking from his own experience: "No, it's not," she replied, softly resolute.
He shifted closer, leaning towards her from across the table: "He's a fool," he muttered, grimly. He gave a slight shake of his head, his eyes probing her features. "You know that?" he continued, his tone casual but compelling: "To let you go so easy… he's got to be…. one very stupid sonavabitch."
Kate smiled uncertainly; it was a back-handed sort of compliment, but a compliment nonetheless and it affected her, coming from this man, more than she would have anticipated. She knew Gibbs never approved of her relationship with Brad and that he never understood her decision to leave NCIS.
She knew also that she was very much altered to the woman he used to know. But he spoke to her just the same, looked at her, if possible, with even more interest and feeling. Gibbs still saw something in her that she thought she'd lost and all of her most natural reactions to him were as profound and exciting as they had been when they'd first met.
"Are you…" she shook her head, looking down at her hands resting on the tabletop.
Gibbs leaned forward to hear her, his own large hands clasped together over the deep mahogany, sitting just an inch from her own.
She glanced up from under her lashes at him: "Are you flirting with me, Gibbs?" she asked, shyly.
"No," he answered, immediately with a faintly indignant tone of voice.
She searched his face for a moment and realized he'd honestly meant what he'd said, he wanted her to know that, and didn't know if anyone had told her so. She smiled again, thoughtfully, then picked up her glass and tipped the melted ice into her throat.
"You were right…" she murmured, leaning back in her seat.
"Hmm?" he questioned, sitting back also, the leather booth creaking with his body's movement.
"Romance between agents…" she reminded him, resting her swirling head back against the dark leather seat.
Gibbs' eyes studied her for a moment and she did not shirk his gaze. There was no point in pretending that the Kate Todd, who, years before, had challenged him on his statement about mixing professional and personal relationships, even existed now. As much as she wished different.
Gibbs opened his mouth to say something, then seemed to reconsider: "I'll get you another drink," he muttered, swiping her glass and his and heading quickly towards the bar.
TBC... Thanks for reading and especially reviewing! M.