Proposal Problems

"Harry, where are we going?"

"You'll know when we get there."

"But…"

"No. It didn't work the first thousand times you asked, it won't work now. I'm not telling you. Like I said, you'll know when we get there?"

"Yes, but what if I'm terribly allergic to where ever we are going? Or what if you are smuggling me out of our house to only be captured by rogue pirates or angry Spider-people or something? Please tell me that this isn't just some elaborate trick to get rid of me."

"It's not some elaborate trick to get rid of you. If I were trying to get rid of you it wouldn't have put as much effort into it. I would have probably just called Ron and told him you insulted not only his lineage, wife's lineage, and the state of his credit, but also said he had bad hair."

"His hair really is rather horrid."

"Trust me, Draco. You'll like where I'm taking you. You won't be terribly allergic."

"I had better not me. I don't like sneezing, it makes my eyeballs hurt."

"Ah, so that's where James gets that phrase."

"Well it does. You wouldn't know because you have the immune system of…someone with a very strong immune system. You're never sick."

"You are very frail because of the generations upon generations of Malfoys who had children with their brothers and sisters. I'm surprised you don't have webbed fingers or an insane number of toes or something."

"Ah, you've never seen my baby pictures, have you? I was a very good swimmer."

"Don't even bloody joke about that. It's creepy."

"You're the one who brought it up. So Harry, where are we going again?"

"No! It's not going to work. I'm not telling you. We're almost there anyway. If you'll just sit still and…no…don't take off the bloody blindfold, don't make me spell it to your face…we'll be there in a minute. Stop fussing."

"I'm not fussing; I'm just worried about the inevitable crease that this blindfold is making in my hair. There won't be real people where we are going that will see my hair mussed, will there?"

"Real people? What do you mean by that?"

"You don't count, of course."

"I'm not a real person? Since when? I must say, this is news to me."

"You don't count because you've seen me at my worst, with my hair sticking to my face and those ghastly pillow lines all over my face. For Merlin's sake Potter, you've seen me when my face goes all blotchy when I'm…you know…"

"And I still think you're beautiful, especially when you're hair is disheveled and you've got pillow lines and drool and when you are coming and your face goes all blotchy. It just proves to me that you trust me enough to allow me to see your real self, not the mask you reserve for everyone else."

"That or you are finding poetry in the mere lack of the ability to be perfect all the time."

"You are perfect all the time, you just don't realize it."

"If you're expecting me to chime in with 'Oh you are beautiful in everything you do, even when you're doing laundry or chewing with your mouth open or belching and blowing it into my face' then you are mistaken, Potter. Those sentiments aren't shared. I'm sure that isn't much of a surprise."

"No. I didn't expect you to think so."

"Good. Just as long as that's understood. So, where are we going?"

"Nowhere. We're here. Hold on, I'll get you out. Don't touch that blindfold."

"But…Harry, I promise I'm going to hurt you. As much as I like blindfolds I don't think they belong in cars. I think you should be able to see at all times in a car. For all I know you could be rolling me into an ocean or something. Harry? HARRY!"

"Calm down, love, I'm not rolling you into the ocean. Here, take my hand, I'm going to lead you a short distance and then I'll tell you to take off your blindfold, alright?"

"I don't take orders from you. I might take it off, I might not."

"You'll want to, I promise."

"I'll believe it when I see it. And I'm bloody cold. I don't understand why I didn't have time to grab a coat or something."

"For Merlin's sake Draco, you can have mine if you'll stop whining."

"I will. Now give me your coat before I freeze to death then come back to haunt you because of this ridiculous idea got me killed."

"It's only ridiculous because you don't know what's going on. If you had thought this plan up you would be explaining to me how very amazingly clever you are for coming up with such an amazingly clever plan. Since you weren't the one to think it up, however, you are bloody well whining. It's not attractive."

"Yes, and I'm really worried about if you find me attractive or not. Seriously Potter, I would think that you would realize I'm rather secure with our relationship after so many years together. Honestly."

"You'd better…"

"There is nothing you could tack on to the end of that sentence that I haven't heard before. There's no point in finishing, really."

"Alright then, I won't."

"Ow! You bloody wanker, why didn't you tell me there was a very large rock in front of me?"

"I was going to say, 'You'd better watch out for that very large rock in front of you', but you told me you'd heard it before."

"I hate you."

"Hate, love, it's all the same, really. Now, turn around like…yes. Right there. Now, don't move and don't take off your blindfold until I tell you, alright?"

"Alright, but I don't see what all this fuss is about. This had better be the best thing I've ever experienced. There had better be lots and lots of sex after this."

"I should hope so…now…take off the blindfold."

"Wh…Wow, it's a sunset. I'm blown the fuck away. What are you doing down there? Is this your genius plan, take me to a cliff and suck me off as the sun sets? We could have done that at home."

"No, it wasn't my plan. Now give me your hand, the left one is preferred."

"Why?"

"Just…instead of asking questions for once, can you just do what I say?"

"No."

"Draco…"

"Fine. Arse."

"Draco, I love you more than I ever thought I would love anyone. I didn't have what one would call a family growing up and I always wanted one, I wanted someone to love and someone to love me in return, and I think I've found that in you. I didn't think my life could be any fuller until we had James, and I finally knew what life was really about. I know that we've been together for a long time, but I feel like we need to take the final step. Draco Malfoy, will you marry me?"

"No."

"What?"

"No. You are only doing this because I suggested it a couple of weeks ago."

"I thought about it a lot. We're ready. I'm ready. Now, I'm going to ask again and this time you'll say something different. Alright?"

"We'll see."

"Draco, marry me. Please."

"Oh, if you insist."

"I do. I really really do."

End