Title: Cabin Fever

Author: MindyH

Chapter: 3 Unofficial

I admit I would not have found it if I wasn't snooping. Officially, I was looking for some paper to on which to sketch. Unofficially, I was snooping.

I'm more shocked than I thought I would be to find in the desk in the spare room a picture of me -- but not a flattering one. It's the one Tony found of me during my Spring Break rebellion, half-naked, covered in water and alcohol, posing with a smashed smile for the camera.

I had vainly hoped that Gibbs had not seen this, did not know about this. But I realize that the picture was probably printed from his computer at the office, since he doesn't have one at home. I can't help but wonder why; as my anger at Tony reignites, as well as my never-ending shame over the event that I can't, to this day, recall.

I sense Gibbs appearing in the doorway as I stare in dismay at the carefully folded piece of paper.

"Ah," he shifts slightly and says uneasily: "I can explain that."

I turn towards him, my expression half amusement and half accusation. I feel like saying the same thing, except that I can't explain my actions in this photo.

"I can explain that," he nods resolutely as I cock my head to the side expectantly.

I'm very willing to hear what he has to say, but his tenseness is fueling my embarrassment, so I fold the paper and head out of the room.

"I'm burning this," I say, heading for the fireplace, where the embers of last night's fire still smolder.

"Kate," says Gibbs gently, capturing my wrist as I move past him.

I pause in the doorway, a flush in my cheeks. This is not how I want Gibbs to see me. I'm so afraid he'll think less of me.

"Are you mad?" he asks quietly.

"No," I struggle to say, my eyes cast to the floor. "I'm just…embarrassed."

He takes the piece if paper carefully from my fingers, opens it and looks at it. I raise my eyes to his face. His expression shows no disgust or judgment or amusement. No disapproval or disappointment. He does not look at it like it is a pin-up or a joke. Soft eyes trace my younger figure like they seem to have done a hundred times before.

I realize that Gibbs printed this out in secret, hid it in shame, and brought it up here at some point. He looked at it on his lonely vacations, sitting at the desk, lying in his bed, on his couch, longing for someone he thought he could never have. This is as close to me as he ever thought he would get.

I know how he feels. I keep a particularly favorite photo of him in my bedside drawer. Of course, mine is a crime scene photo I stole from Abby and he's nowhere near naked, but the feeling is mutual.

"I'm sorry," he says quietly and hands it back: "You can burn it if you want to."

Gibbs' rare apologies always take me by surprise, so I weakly take the paper and head for the fire. I haven't taken two steps before I turn again and look at him.

My eyes glow with warmth as I tell him softly: "You don't need this anymore."

He doesn't need the sleepless longing of an outdated photo. He can have the real deal, we both can. Gibbs has me now, for better or worse, and I'm not going anywhere. If he wants to see me or talk to me or touch me, all he has to do is reach out. I'll never deny him or be indifferent like a plain piece of paper. He can have everything I've got.

My eyes communicate this unspoken promise and I watch his mouth turn up at the edges. Blue eyes glitter happily in comprehension and he takes a step forward. He kisses my cheek lightly as he removes the paper from my fingers again and throws it in the fireplace without a second thought.

I smile and let it burn.

Then I go into the bedroom and dig out my camera, I know I brought it up here. It's a gorgeous day, so I start taking photos of the cabin and the mountains and the ducks in the lake. I take one of Gibbs with his coffee and morning paper and he takes one of me in my favorite green sweater. Then we join hands and take a stroll around the lake.

For the FULL story (rated NC17) go to the NCIS Fanfiction Archive or email me directly.