Talk
She panted.
Her heart was beating against her chest, going against the usual rhythms of heartbeats she experienced everyday.
She gasped for breath, mouth frantically trying to draw in air, her hand fumbling around in her handbag.
She yanked the cap off the inhaler and inhaled, her breath left hanging in the air.
She drew a sigh, the first breath of not-so-fresh polluted air.
It's strange how we don't notice these small things like heartbeat that keeps us alive when we're alive, she thought, tugging her hand-knitted scarf closer to her freezing neck. The town was cold, even though the street lights kept the place warm and bright. She strolled past the outlandishly decorated shops with quick accented footsteps, even though she wasn't in a rush.
Her eyes slithered to a young couple in the local café, sipping coffee from large soup bowls and dunking muffins into their coffee, smiling at each other happily. She glared at them through her eyeliner, reminiscing the past week since the breakup.
He had told her that he couldn't. She had coughed coagulated lumps of maroon blood out.
She almost fell to an asthma attack that day, their last date at the hospital.
It's strange how we don't notice love, she thought, a hint of bitterness lingered with the aftertaste of the thought and the medicinal taste of the gas from the inhaler.
--
Once again, she was sitting at home, alone.
Her two-days-old eyeliner was smudged, traces of it, mixed with salty liquid, smeared on the perfect porcelain skin.
How long had it been since that last "I love you", she had longed for the touch of his warm hands again, to hold her head up, to face the world again.
She bit her lips, coated with an overdose of cherry lipgloss.
These lips haven't kissed and produced the ringing sounds of her vocal chords for days.
The phone hung limply in her hand, dial tones screeching in her ear.
All she ever wanted to do was to talk.
--
"Hi, I'm not in now. Please leave a message after the-"
She hung up. The dial tones resounded like alien signals in her head.
She gently held the phone, checked the call history.
Twelve missed calls from some unknown number.
It was a good thing she had a built-in caller ID system in her phone which cost her a bomb of a scolding from her mom.
She teared. Then she felt a rush of blood rising to her throat.
The frail body collapsed, maroon splattering on the cashmere carpet.
"I love you." She whispered to the wool engulfing her frail frame.
All she wanted to do was to talk.
--
He gently placed the receiver back on the hook of the public phone.
He smiled at the payphone. He knew she would not pick up calls.
He had seen him, the original, back in town.
He had decided to step out of this love he still loved so much.
It couldn't help but hurt so much to think:
He was just a replacement.
It's strange how these things like love keep us going for more for nothing in the end, he thought, flipping a coin in his palm.
He pulled his windbreaker closer to his body.
All he wanted to do was to talk after all.
And fall in love withher, over and over again.