A/N: Thank you very much for the reviews last chapter! Huge thank you to lanamarymack for alpha/beta reading!
It took a while for the portkey-squeezing feeling behind her navel to stop, but when it finally did, Hermione found herself in a cold, stone room, with a not very comfortable looking straw bed in it. Looking down at her body, she saw she was wearing a pale pink gown, complete with a ridiculous corset which was pushing her bust up to an uncomfortable level. "Merlin, not even remotely historically accurate," she whispered to herself, scowling.
Looking around the room, she didn't see any sign of Remus, Sirius or the boys, but realized she wasn't alone. Another woman was in the room with her and Hermione quickly realized that it was Ginny.
Confused for a moment, Hermione slowly came to the realization that she must be in the plot of the book. She groaned in frustration, wondering just how she'd gotten into this mess and how she'd get out of it. She'd barely gotten into the second chapter of her romance novel, so she had no idea what was going to happen in the end. But, at least she knew that she was about to be captured by some vikings.
A thought popped into her head. Couple's romance novels had been the rage in the late seventies, allowing a couple to enter a sexy romance together, but they had quickly fallen out of fashion. She'd just picked the book up from a used bookstore and hadn't given the back of it a thorough read. Instead, she'd been a little too distracted by the cover model, whom she'd thought looked quite a bit like Remus. Now, she was realizing the cover had probably been enchanted to use your subconscious to fill the role.
Merlin, Remus.
He'd been holding the book too, which meant that he was likely in the novel as well. He was probably completely mortified, not to mention that he'd been more than a little bit tipsy at his return from the pub. How disorienting it must be to be transported into a completely different world without any notice.
Hell, it was jarring enough for her and she was completely sober!
"Hermione?" The girl who looked like Ginny was trying to get her attention, looking progressively more concerned as the sound of warhorns grew louder as they crept nearer.
Hermione did not remember the name the book had assigned this particular character, but she didn't want to chance calling her by the wrong name, unsure if it would have the magic to adjust. "Uh, yes?" she asked, hoping she sounded confident.
"Can't you hear the war horns?" she asked, urging Hermione to peer out into the darkness at the window. It was incredibly dark out with no artificial light of any kind, so Hermione couldn't see anything. But, she remembered that there was a large body of water, lapping in the distance. "Do you think the Vikings will raid the castle, as they promised your mother they would?"
Characteristics of the woman she was meant to be came flooding back. She was some sort of Scottish princess, living in a castle. Her mother had been warned by the vikings that they would come to take all of their treasure because her mother had boasted that the walls that surrounded their castle were impenetrable.
Due to the novel being called The Viking's Maiden, she assumed that she was undoubtedly going to be kidnapped - walls or no walls - but decided to play along, if only it meant that she would be reunited with Remus. Then they could hopefully get out of this mess together.
"Nonsense, you heard mother," Hermione lied, sitting down in front of her vanity. "The vikings will never be able to breach the walls. Now, come braid my hair and tell me about the warrior that had stolen your heart."
The Ginny-esque handmaiden prattled on about her secret relationship, which sounded remarkably like Harry's relationship with Ginny. She let herself enjoy the feeling of her fingers brushing through her hair, pulling it back into a tight plait. If she was going to be kidnapped, she didn't want her hair getting in the way, at least.
It didn't take long for the horns to get progressively louder as it became clear to the two women that the vikings were upon them and they needed to do something.
"Oh, Hermione, what shall we do?" Ginny fretted, sticking her head out the window in an attempt to see anything. This time, the night was lit by their torches. "They are climbing the walls!"
Hermione looked around the room. She didn't want to be too easy to kidnap. "Help me push the dresser in front of the door, so that they can't get in," she instructed, trying to move the heavy piece of furniture. With Ginny's help, they were able to get the dresser in front of the door and bolted the door tightly.
A commotion was starting downstairs and Hermione realized that the vikings must have been able to get into the castle at this point, which only caused Ginny to fret. "What should we do now?" she asked, looking to her princess for guidance.
"There is only one thing we can do," Hermione said, looking at her ginger friend solemnly. "We wait."
Only a few seconds later, the sound of an axe hacking at the door startled them. The wood was thick and studded, though, so it would hold up for some time to the abuse.
Realizing that she could save Ginny from too much discomfort, she instructed her to hide. "They will only be looking for me. Hide under the bed and keep quiet. Maybe they won't find you," Hermione whispered. She knew that it was just a part of the book, but she didn't want her friend to get hurt if she would help it.
Ginny looked like she was going to argue, but then the wood of the door began to splinter and she no longer needed convincing. Just when she was fully hidden, the door broke open and hands began pulling bits of wood back so that they could get in, only to be thwarted by the dressed.
"Too bloody smart for your own good," an unknown man muttered with a chuckle.
But, the dresser was quite trivial for the viking to remove of his own and he quickly pushed into the room. When Hermione got a look at his face, she couldn't stop from gasping in surprise. "Sirius?" she asked - more to herself than to the man himself.
His grey eyes filled with mirth at the recognition. "My reputation precedes me?" he asked. "Yes, Princess, Sirius at your service." He gave her a mock bow before straightening up and stalking over to her. "Now, are you going to be a good girl and come with me or am I going to have to tie you up and carry you over my shoulder?"
Hermione could only gape at him, unable to believe that Sirius was here, too. Only, he seemed to be inhabiting one of the characters, like the Ginny lookalike. She decided that the book must read into your subconscious to fill the character roles with more believable people from your own life. She could only wonder who else would show up along the way.
While she was waffling, considering the complexity of the magic that was involved in producing one of these novels, Sirius apparently grew tired of waiting for an answer and picked her up, throwing her over his shoulder as promised. She tried to struggle, pounding on his back, unable to move her legs due to his tight grip on her.
Sirius gave her a smack on the bum, laughing to himself and carrying her out of the bedroom. "You are so feisty, I might just have to keep you for myself, Princess!" he teased. He barked a couple of orders at the warriors who were with him before practically skipping down the stairs with his prize over his shoulder.
Once they were outside in the dark night air, Hermione sighed. "You can let me walk, you know?" she insisted. "I'll go with you. I won't try to run away."
"I know you won't, because I'm not letting you out of my sight until we get to the boats," he answered. "And you really think you'd be able to outrun me?"
No, Hermione did not think so. She knew that the book was going to take her to the boats no matter what, if only to advance the plot. So, she stilled, resigned to spend the rest of their journey in silence, though she wanted to complain about his hard shoulder jostling her belly with every step.
Eventually, Hermione heard the current lapping at the shore and deduced that they had finally arrived at the boat. Not wanting anyone to see her in such an undignified state, she began to struggle again, even if she knew it was futile.
Sirius slapped her on the arse again, making her gasp in indignation.
"Alright, Pet. Down you go," Sirius said before righting Hermione. She tried desperately to smooth her pink dress and ignored his warning about trying to run off.
Her attention was caught by a growl. "Sirius, what the hell are you doing?" an annoyed sounding Remus demanded.
Hermione's large brown eyes snapped to his face and she was pleased to see a flash of recognition. So it really was the real Remus in there, not an odd copy like the Sirius or Ginny lookalikes.
Sirius broke the tension that had settled between them. "Now, Remus, I know you said no hostages, but I am going to make this one my wench!" he pronounced proudly, throwing a heavy arm around her shoulders, tucking her in close to his body.
"Really?" Ron objected fiercely. "You already have three wenches back home. What's so special about this one?"
Hermione gasped in indignation that her friend would talk about her that way, as if he couldn't think of anything special about his best friend, before reminding herself that he was only a shade of the real wizard.
Sirius rolled his eyes. "Well, because she's the princess, of course," he answered.
Ron scoffed in response. "Yeah, but you've already got a Persian princess from our last long raid."
The older man pouted. "But this one's a Scottish princess. I've never had one of them before."
Hermione bristled at hearing that. This was not the sort of talk she appreciated, least of all about her!
"What do you say, Remus, can I please keep her?" Sirius practically begged.
Hermione's eyes snapped back to Remus, suddenly remembering that he was there, looking rather delectable in a rugged attire, a wolf's pelt draped over his shoulders. He was coming to the realization that he was somehow in charge of the situation.
Clearing his throat, he took control. "No," he said firmly.
Sirius grinned up at him. "Ah, has this fine Scottish lass finally caught your eye, Remus? I thought no woman would ever turn your head," he teased. "I will warn you though...She is a feisty one!"
Remus shook his head, looking everywhere except at her, which annoyed her more than anything. Didn't he know they should be working together so that they could get out of the conundrum they found themselves in? "Of course not," he answered with a growl. "We will ransom her back to her mother. Surely she will fetch a pretty tribute."
Sirius looked disappointed, but nodded anyway, still holding her tightly against his body. Hermione struggled to free her arm, wanting to talk to Remus alone. They needed a strategy.
But, it seemed that Remus did not share her idea. Instead, he was giving more orders, turning on his heel to get away from her. "Take her and put her somewhere safe on the ship. I don't want anyone to touch her and diminish her value," he said, making it emphatically clear that he would hurt anyone who touched her. "That includes you, Sirius."
Sirius pulled at her arm, leading Hermione away from Remus. "Wait, Remus! There is something that I need to tell you," she said, pleading.
"Not now, Hermione. We will talk later," he promised, still not making eye contact with her. He stalked off, apparently trusting Sirius to do as he asked, before walking off in the direction of another ship, Ron following closely behind him.
She couldn't believe how stubborn he was being! Unable to do anything else, she complied with Sirius as much as she could, following him down into the belly of a longship, only to be deposited in a lush looking cabin filled with an assortment of gold and jewels.