AN/ Hey! Yay another small fanfic. Yay! This is just a one shot. I don't really want to go anywhere with it. Just an idea that the plot bunny farm keeps shoving in my head! Omg its soooo annoying it won't stop. Half way through writing this, I got another one that I'm writing now too! So yah. This has sort of spoilers for the season ender.. sort of?

Summary: What if something else hit the car… instead of the truck?

Understanding

Sam was driving to the hospital. His brother was loosing blood, and his father had been shot in the leg. They both needed medical attention. The hospital was only 10 minutes away. He would make it there, for Dean and his Dad, if nothing else he would make sure that most of all, his brother lived.

"Sammy why didn't you kill it? I thought we saw eye to eye on this, killing the demon comes first. Before me, before everything." John asked quietly looking at his youngest son, Sam in the seat next to him. His eldest son in the back seat unconscious.

Sam watched the road and shook his head, looking in the rear view mirror at his unconscious brother in the back seat. "No sir not before everything. Look we still have the colt we still have the one bullet left. We just gotta start over…"

The eldest Winchester shook his head. "No Sam. You should have killed it. You should have killed me. I was willing to sacrifice anything to kill this demon."

Sam's heart rate hitched. "So what Dad? You would have shot me or Dean wouldn't you? If that demon had possessed us. You would have killed us?" John didn't reply at first and leaned his head against the window of the car. Staring out into the night before he replied.

"Sam… it isn't like that." He tried, this was hard for him, Sam was touching in spots that he would rather not discuss.

"It sure as hell is like that Dad. You would let me and Dean die wouldn't you? Just so you could kill that Demon? You would have shot one of us if we had been possessed would you? For the greater good dad?" Sam asked harshly stepping on the gas he needed to get his brother to a hospital fast.

John Winchester stared out the window again he didn't know what he would have done. "Sam…I don't' know what I would have done. I loved your mother so much…."

Sam cut him off yelling, "And I loved Jess! I was going to marry her!"

"Don't raise your voice to me!" John bellowed back. His anger spiking, how dare Sam do say that... Yet it was true.

"Why the hell not Dad? I wouldn't kill you, so you're mad at me. I have every reason to have killed that demon as you do. He took Jess away, the same way he took Mom. The exact same way. I was lying on my bed the drops fell and I looked up and there she was dad! The same way that it happened with mom." Sam cried out. His anger lacing each word he spoke. He looked in the review mirror at his brother. His eyes were still closed.

"You don't understand Sam." John tried again, it wasn't going to work on his youngest though.

Sam laughed hitting the wheel of the Impala. "No Dad. I understand perfectly. You would have killed me or Dean. You would have, you would have said sorry later to who ever lived... but you would have killed us. What you don't understand Dad, as that we need you." Dean coughed in the backseat dripping blood.

"Sammy…" John sighed. "I want this over. But you're wrong. I wouldn't have killed either of you."

Sam scoffed, "And how can I be sure? You walk in and out of our life with not so much as a word. How the hell am I supposed to know dad. It's not like you ever tell us anything. You would have killed us to get the Demon, and you know it."

"God damnit Sam! Would you listen to yourself? I would not have killed either of you, I'm fighting for you. Don't you care that you never had a mother? That you're never going to have Jess again? I fight for you, not against you! I want you to have a good life, and I've already messed that up. I wanted you to kill me because you would have been able to have that with the Demon gone. He's a fucking real bad ass. And you could have done it Sam. You could have done it if you were more of a man like-"

"What like Dean? Well let me tell you something Dad. He didn't want you dead. He was yelling for me not to do it. Dad, he loves you I love you, your our father, we wouldn't' have killed you no matter what! Neither of us would. Sorry if were not as cold hearted as you wanted us to be. But dad, we would never ever, kill a member of our family. As fucked up as we are dad, that's what we are. F-A-M-I-L-Y Family dad, that's what we still are, with or with out Mom and even Jess. I we wouldn't kill you or Dean he taught me that much."

"I know where a family Sammy." John sighed watching as the hospital came into view.

"Like you said dad, we can get pretty obsessed. But unlike you, I would never hurt you or Dean. Dean knows that I'll watch out for him, and I know he does the same about me. But you know what he said that really made me not shoot you back there dad?" Sam asked pulling into the hospital ambulance stop, turning off the ignition.

John looked at his son, "What's that Sam?" He asked undoing his seat belt.

Sam glared at his father and then stared into the rear view mirror at his older brother. "He said, that we are no good to anyone dead, and, all we have is the three of us, we aren't gonna bury anyone, and if getting this thing means that we get ourselves killed... then it isn't worth it, nothing is worth that Dad. And I mean nothing." Sam finished getting out of the car and getting his brother. Leaving his father to think about what he said.