Ah! Finally! Yet another chapter! Why do I take so long, though? Sheesh. I am a bad Selan. Bad, bad me.

Man, though. I originally intended this to be four chapters long, but now I'm up to three and only maybe halfway through. Is that good or bad…?

…

Chapter three / Contact

It didn't take them long to get back to Vort, and with their new ship they didn't even have to speak with the border guards—they just flew right into Vortian airspace with no trouble at all. They orbited the planet for a short while before landing, however, so that they could devise the next part of their plan.

"We've been phenomenally lucky so far," Lard Nar said to his two companions, "But once we land, we'll have to assume that our luck is out. Once we leave the ship, it'll be clear that we are NOT Irkens."

Shloonktapooxis bounced. "Can't we make some awesome DISGUISES?"

Spleenk nodded. "Yeah! We've still got the moustaches!"

Lard Nar shook his head. "I don't think that will work. I think our best bet would be to find a safe place to land and stay hidden. I'm sure we can find someone who would be willing to help us from there. Shloonktapooxis, do you still have our Vortian transmitter?"

Shloonktapooxis did a little flip in mid-air. "No DUH! Here ya' go!" The top of his head opened up, and a small radio-like device with a microphone attatched to it jumped out of Shloonktapooxis' head and landed right in the Resisty leader's hands.

"Good," Lard Nar set the radio down on his lap, and turned some dials with one hand whilst pressing buttons with another. The radio emitted static and odd little weee-ooo-weeeee noises. Lard Nar pressed down on a green button and spoke into the machine. "Hello, hello? Vortian brothers?"

Static.

"This is Captain Lard Nar of the Resisty. Is anyone there?"

Static. Popping noises. Static.

"We're on a rescue mission. I repeat—"

Finally, a voice came through.

"Took you long enough!" It said through the static.

Lard Nar sighed in relief. "Is there anywhere safe we can land?"

"It's been years!" The voice complained, "Why hasn't anyone else come to help?"

"It really hasn't been possible," Lard Nar explained hurriedly, "Now, we need to land! Where is a secure area?"

"We've had to hide out in holes in the ground, you know!" The voice continued, completely ignoring Lard Nar. "Those Irkens are everywhere and the heck if I'll get captured by them!"

"Yes, well, that's all well and good," Lard Nar sighed, "But where can we land where the Irkens won't see us?"

"Oh, you want to land now? Why didn't you say so before?"

Lard Nar knew better than to argue. The voice gave him a set of coordinates. Spleenk followed the directions and found a small valley, surrounded by high mountains. Very few plants seemed to grow there, and what plants did thrive were all weeds. They set the ship down among the thorny, sparse leaves and stepped out.

"Hello?" Lard Nar called out, cupping his hands onto his mouth.

"Awfully small ship for a rescue mission!" A voice said in the distance. It was the same voice from the radio.

"It's the best we could do," Lard Nar said, looking around, "Where are you?"

"Down here!"

Lard Nar, Spleenk, and Shloonktapooxis looked down in unison. A small blue Vortian face was looking back at them from under an ajar manhole that had been covered in dirt to camouflage it.

"Hi there!" Shloonktapooxis said too enthusiastically.

"Get in before they see you!" The blue Vortian commanded.

He disappeared down a ladder under the manhole, and the three Resisty members followed suit, closing the lid above them. They climbed down the ladder in darkness until they emerged into a dimly lit chamber filled with various exhausted-looking Vortians. The Resisty looked around. The Vortians all looked back at the Resisty.

"Honestly," Said the blue Vortian, "I don't know how you're going to fit us all in that ship."

"Er…," Lard Nar coughed. "Really, we didn't expect to find so many outside captivity."

"No excuse for poor preparation," the blue one shook his head. "No excuse at all. Who did you say you were, again?"

"I'm Captain Lard Nar," Lard Nar said, "And this is Spleenk, and this one is Shloonktapooxis. We're the Resisty."

"The what?" Asked a greenish Vortian near the back.

Lard Nar had known this would happen. "The… Resisty."

"That's a dumb name," Noted a pink Vortian closer to them.

Lard Nar sighed. "I know."

"Who came up with that?" Asked another.

Lard Nar pointed to Spleenk. Spleenk smiled nervously. The Vortians all laughed.

Lard Nar sighed again and shook his head. "Yes, yes, it's a very funny name."

Shloonktapooxis bobbed and made a face. "I suggested the Pirate Monkeys!"

There was silence, then roaring laughter. Lard Nar wanted to disappear. Some triumphant return to the homeland this was!

"That's enough!" Lard Nar cried, "We want to speak with whoever's in charge of this little group here."

"That'd be me," Said the blue Vortian. "Mayor Lad Prig, at your service. Welcome to the quaint little town of Hole-in-the-ground."

"Ah. Well then," Lard Nar adjusted his goggles. "May we speak to you in private, please?"

"We're talking now, aren't we?"

Lard Nar looked around at the crowd. "Not in private."

"Oh, private!" Said Lad Prig, "I thought you said pirate."

"Why in the world would I have said pirate?" Lard Nar asked in frustration.

"I don't know, that cone friend of yours seems to like monkey pirates, so…"

Lard Nar put his head in his hands. "No, no. We wish to speak with you in private."

Lad Prig motioned over to a tunnel in the rock wall. "Well then! Step into my office!"

The three Resisty members followed Lad Prig down the tunnel into a small, cramped cavern. The mayor of Hole-in-the-ground sat down on a rock behind another rock that looked almost like a desk. Lard Nar and his comrades stood in front of him.

"I'm looking for my grandfather," Said Lard Nar. "I suspect that he's probably in imprisonment somewhere on this planet."

Shloonktapooxis blinked. "Hey, what about—"

Lard Nar elbowed the cone.

"I thought you said you were on a rescue mission," Said Lad Prig.

"We are. We're rescuing him first, then we'll come back for everyone else," Lard Nar explained.

"Well that's bunk," Said the mayor with a frown.

"I'm afraid that's really the only way we can do this," Lard Nar said.

Lad Prig shrugged. "Guess we gotta take what we can get. I'll check my files, see if I can find your granddad. What was his name, now?"

"Ped Grob," Lard Nar replied.

There was silence for a moment. Lard Nar fidgeted. "… Well?"

"Hm? Oh. Well, I didn't say I'd check my files now."

Lard Nar sighed. "Soon, then?"

"Oh, yes. Soon."

"But not now?"

"No, not now."

Lard Nar sighed. "Well, that's fine, I guess…"

Lad Prig stood up. "See, can't do it now because it's just about dinner time, you see?"

Lard Nar blinked. Dinner? Authentic Vortian food! He hadn't had a good Vortian meal in so long...!

Shloonktapooxis bobbed over to Lad Prig. "Aww, common, can't you skip dinner? The suspense is KILLING me!"

Lard Nar pulled Shloonktapooxis away from the mayor, images of his mother's cooking floating around his head. "Now, now, we shouldn't keep a man away from his meal. In fact, I think we should all sit down to eat."

"Good man," Said Lad Prig as he stood back up. "Come on, let's get to the dining cavern before the good seats are taken."

So the four of them went to get dinner, ready to get to work as soon as their bellies were filled.