O.O Sliefoxx needs a muse. Anybody have one up for grabs?

Unbetaed.
Barely double-checked.
840 words.
Bordom inspired!Crack.
Flaming welcomed. ♥

AN: O.O Sliefoxx needs a muse. Anybody have one up for grabs?

Parts
It was morning, and Eiri woke groggy as he normally did, greeted by the sounds of Shuuichi frantically readying himself. It was almost noon, and Shuuichi had overslept do to some activity the past night. Eiri was of course grouchy from being woke, but content, and merely watched as Shuuichi threw something resembling last week's leftovers into a lunch bag.

Just before Shuuichi ran out the front door, Eiri stopped him, and gave the younger a very passionate kiss.

Then Shuuichi tried to eat him.

Not in the sexy, 'come hither' way, but in a creepy cannibalistic way, that suited Shuuichi perfectly ... and he still managed to appear cute, if a little insane.

In the corner of his eye, Eiri noticed a pair of pink ears, but this detail seemed unimportant, because something warm and wet was making it's sick, slimy, familiar way up his neck. That's when Tohma appeared from nowhere, as he had habit doing in real life anyway. Tohma clung to Eiri's arm, shot Shuuichi a deathly, dirty glance, then pleaded with Eiri to come to N-G with him. Eiri was bristling, as Shuuichi was still chewing on one arm, and Tohma seemed determined to lick the flesh off his other. When Tohma asked Shuuichi between licks, if he minded Eiri coming with them, Shuuichi shook his head 'No', and nearly took some skin with him.

At N-G, all was chaos, and Sakano didn't help as he frantically hustled all of N-G's employees with various orders. Fujjisaki Suguru was also bustling, as he searched fruitlessly for a late Shuuichi. When Fujisaki noticed that Eiri had entered, chaperoning both Tohma and Shuuichi, he began pouting and whining, complaining about how 'Those three's fetishes shouldn't interfere with work!'.

Sakano was in the background, fainting.

Again, Eiri thought he saw a flash of pink that wasn't Shuuichi's head, but couldn't address the colour as K and Hiro emerged from a nearby elevator.

K strutted out yelling something about Ryuichi, and Hiro seemed strangely bubbly. He also couldn't seem to take his eyes off of K ... or stop smiling ... creepily.

Eiri didn't have time to be suspicious when Ryuichi jumped from the same elevator, completely naked. Mostly nude anyway; the only thing Ryuichi wore was a brown headband. He promptly latched himself to Shuuichi, gnawing on Shuuichi's head with sharp-toothed enthusiasm.

Eiri felt his eye twitch when Ryuichi looked up at him with a full mouth and sparkling eyes, and asked as prettily as he pleased, "Oo oo owe er Ooao-o i?"

"Fuck off." Eiri responded as gracefully as one can with one's brother-in-law licking one's arm, one's lover chewing on the other arm, and said lover being chewed on by a nakedprobablyqueerman in a headband.

That's when Eiri noticed that his pants were a little tighter than they should have been. He looked down to yell at whatever offending object was making that happen, when he realized that it indeed was not a body part.

Kumagoro smiled up at him, and lunged at his face with pink bunny glee.

Eiri woke to the sounds of Shuuichi frantically rushing through the house.

'I could make a goddamn song from those noises ...' He groaned to himself, and lifted a heavy arm to push his blond bangs from his face. A glance at the clock told him that it was almost noon, and that Shuuichi had overslept again.

For whatever reason. They hadn't had sex last night.

Eiri snickered to himself, and pushed himself out of bed in all his naked glory. The smell of toast made his stomach growl, and the traveling of Shuuichi's curses made his lips twitch. He lazy leaned against the bedroom doorway, and watched as Shuuichi balanced on one foot by the front door, dressing the other foot with a sneaker.

"Put some clothes on!" Shuuichi yelled unneeded, over his shoulder, "The curtains are open. Some stalker will take pictures of you and then everyone on the Internet will see you naked, and I'll be upset." He stomped his foot against the ground, and grinned at the bed ruffled Eiri, "Later!" Shuuichi shifted his backpack and darted out the front door without completely closing it.

Eiri stared for a moment, before glancing to the wide open windows that exposed their front room. He grabbed his penis and made it wave 'Good Afternoon Japan' at whatever photographer happened to be perched on the opposite building's roof.

Toast later.

Bed now.

Eiri turned to return to bed, when he noticed a flash of pink from the corner of his eye. He felt chills up his spine.

Sitting on the kitchen counter top was a little pink bunny with fake plastic camera tied around its neck. A card was propped against its stuffed leg reading:

"To Shuu-chan From Ryuuichi in America!

THIS IS KUMAGORO'S LOVE CHILD!" With a laughing face drawn over the scribbles for kanji.

Eiri crossed the room and pulled the camera from the bunny's neck, and chucked it in the garbage nearby.

Some parts just weren't meant to be shared.