All rights to the characters and story of FsoG belong to E. L. James
(FYI: This is loooong and that's why it's full of all kinds of mistakes)
The Cataclysm Born From Lies
Saturday, May 9th, 2015
Bellevue, Washington
Ana's POV
Christian decided to stay with me at his parent's home while I recovered from my surgery. Half way to Bellevue that morning he told me that he wanted to help take care of me, so Grace puts us up in their largest guest room, as I need a bigger bed so that Christian does not mistakenly hit my incision in his sleep. I told my husband it would be easier to keep him from accidentally hitting me if he slept with his back to me. I could not have handled Christian facing me and wrapping his arms around me. I have to give the sleeping pills Grace prescribed their proper due. Once they take effect, I am in a blissful sleep and don't have to lay awake and think about the man lying beside me. Until I am lost in dreamless sleep, I lay there while silent tears run from the corners of my eyes. I lie beside him and I recognize that I am dying. I was a woman, a daughter, a friend, a daughter-in-law, and I thought I was a wife. I now see myself as I really am, a fool, a joke.
Why, why, why?
Thankfully, Mia listened to me and Grace to scale this party down. I cut the guest list in half and overruled her plan of a huge back yard tent. Now a smaller one serves as a small dance floor and bar. I did not want people here if they had not attended our wedding. I made up the guest list and made sure she had been invited. I could have removed her from the guest list, but I refused my routine of tuning her out to save myself any grief. Tonight, Mrs. Lincoln had my undivided attention. Kate raised many legitimate questions concerning Cruella de Ville, not only her behavior, but her presence on the sideline of my life.
Who are you really, you bitch?
Surprised that I look like my usual self, I refuse the three pounds of make-up that Mia wanted to plaster my face with. I was in no mood to be her personal Barbie doll, but did allow her to curl my hair and we left it hanging down my back. She was given carte blanche over the dress I'd wear which could have been a disaster. Mia did well and bought me a royal blue cocktail dress that wasn't so tight that it constricted around my abdomen. Christian insisted on buying me a sapphire necklace with matching earrings as an anniversary gift since they matched my dress. I oohed and ahhed over them appropriately. When he clasped the necklace for me, it actually felt like the hands of the Christian I thought I knew. Instead of flowers and a card as an anniversary gift, the gift of a billionaire's wife is jewelry from Cartier.
As if money can buy you happiness.
Around eight o'clock, our guests begin to arrive and it is time for my pain medication. I am positive that I am going to need it to make it through this night. I purposely drag my feet as I finish getting ready and at eight-thirty, Christian and I are both dressed and ready to go downstairs to meet the crowd that awaits us. Christian looks like Christian, too handsome for his own good and looking at him makes my heart hurt. I then force myself to remember the past month and despite how much remembering pains me, the sad feeling of loss disappears.
At the top of Carrick and Grace's staircase, Christian raises my hand and kisses it and we slowly walk to our awaiting guests. I am holding Christian's hand and everyone applauds once we make our way to the bottom of the staircase. Naturally, the first to meet us are our family. I spot my always gorgeous best friend and sister-in-law, Kate, who, despite being seven months pregnant, looks fabulous. She piled her long strawberry blonde hair on top of her head and is wearing emerald maternity cocktail dress that is an exact match to the color of her eyes. Kate knows I am not physically or emotionally ready for this, but she encourages me with a beaming smile and carefully hugs me.
"Ana, I am not sure I can handle this," Kate whispers in my ear. I am unable to reply so I give her an extra squeeze.
My best friend. My sitting on our apartment floor watching The Bachelor and drinking beer, best friend.
I follow Christian into the living room and we immediately encounter Reverend Johnson who married us. We spend several minutes speaking with him. He is the first person who will hound me tonight about how I am feeling. We quickly wrap up the conversation and venture further into the crowd.
My eyes rapidly scan the room so I can assess whom I want to avoid. There are several of Christian's business acquaintances that I barely tolerate on a good day. Working the room while Christian shakes all their hands, especially grates on my nerves tonight. Since this is about appearances, I will have to endure it. It is quite funny that Christian feels that he lost his precious control to Mia concerning this party. He was hell bent on cancelling it and I was hell bent on forcing it upon him. Why this petty issue brings me pleasure is childish and although I know it, I really do not care.
Perhaps it is the Percocet.
I find this entire event an alien universe. Here is Ana. Sleepwalking through her life. Now at a loss when she once was so sure. Unfortunately, I have had to discuss my recent medical situation with everyone as we make the rounds of greeting everyone. I have repeated the phrase, "I am feeling much better. Thank you so very much." Until my mouth is dry and all I notice is the tray of champagne that's circulating around the room and cursing that I can't drink any due to my medication. I tell Christian I need to sit down a moment and head to Kate, who is sitting on an oversized sofa sipping on something clear and bubbliy. She takes a small sip and I watch her grimace as though she is sucking on a lemon. I am not positive which one of us is more pathetic, Kate for not being able to get up from a seated position or me for barely being able to sit down.
How ironic is it that we are both fucked up due to our twats?
"What the hell are you drinking?" I ask her and she grimaces.
"Sparkling white grape juice that Grace forced in my hand. I'm sure you'll get one too," She replies.
Kate scoots over for me as I groan when my ass hits the sofa. I watch Kate roll her eyes at me as if to say the way I feel is my own damn fault and I should just suck it up.
"I still don't understand why you went through with this dumb shit idea of Mia's. We both know you feel like hell. How you pulled the wool over Grace's eyes is amazing," Kate mutters low enough so that I can only hear.
"Yes, you do. Christian did not want this party and I wanted to force it upon him," I whisper back to her and she snorts at me.
"That statement was the most immature one I've heard you say. Ana, stop lying to me and yourself. You offer your own suffering trying to make him suffer. This, if you ask me, is an impossible feat. The time has come for you to realize this, Ana."
We grin brightly at an older woman who is on the board of Coping Together with us. Thank God she walked by without grilling me about my surgery.
"I do not sound immature and you promised me you would stop saying that shit, Kate," I reply. I really thought I had gotten her and Luke to understand.
"I also promised myself that after I had Ava I would never go through the hell that is being pregnant. Now, look at me. I could put a plate on my stomach and eat off of it," She replies.
Whether she meant it as a joke is irrelevant. We laugh aloud and several of Grace's stuck up friends stare our way. I even notice Christian and Elliot look in our direction and I roll my eyes, which Christian obviously doesn't appreciate, although Elliot to laughs in return and gives us a big wave.
"Elliot and Christian have been glued at the hip lately, haven't they?" I ask, watching the pair leaning against the bar and throwing back what appears to be bourbon with Carrick.
Kate shrugs her shoulders. "Yeah, but Elliot is happy that they have finally gotten so close again. But, fuck. How many shots have they had already? Shit. I'm beginning to wonder if these Grey men are alcoholics or not," she snorts and I slap her on her arm.
"They are not alcoholics. But it's too bad that alcohol could not have been Christian's vice."
Kate stares at me with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. "Are you getting soft on that, bastard?" She asks me incredulously while her eyes go to the men at the bar.
"Please, Kate. I'm not going to be his whipping post. Pardon the pun. Of course, I am not getting soft. I was merely making an observation," I reply.
I lost my naiveté, girlfriend.
"Do you ever look at him with an overwhelming desire of murder?" Kate asks as she eyes Christian.
I do not immediately answer her, which draws those green eyes to my profile speculatively.
"No…not murder. Orange isn't my color." I deadpan, which sends us into another fit of giggles.
"Changing the subject, where is Ray?"
"He's on his way. He called me before we came down. I think he is bringing his girlfriend, but he didn't come out and say so."
Kate smiles. "I'm glad. Ray has been alone too long. I'm sure his nads are the size of bowling balls and as blue as your dress," She exclaims loudly. I gape at her.
"Katherine Grey! Holy, shit! Who the fuck wants to think of their father like that?" I do my best to sound outraged, but just watching Kate howl with laughter has me joining. She is too funny for her own good.
We once again garner looks from some party guests who must have never heard of having fun. I suppose flipping them off would be inappropriate.
We quietly watch people roaming around the house and then out into the tent. Eventually, Kate thinks of a certain guest she hasn't caught a glimpse of yet.
"Why haven't we been graced by Cruella de Ville? I thought you said she was on the invite list?" Kate continues to look around the room and regarding everyone.
"I am positive we would have heard her broom land," I murmured in reply.
We watch our mother-in-law approach and Kate starts giggling and leans into me. "Here comes your gross sparkling white grape juice. Hope it mixes well with all that medicine you are doped up on."
Sure enough, Grace is carrying a drink and beams at me.
"Here sweet girl. I know you must be dying for something stronger, but alcohol and pain medication could equal another hospital stay, only this time in a coma."
Grace is being serious, but I can't help but laugh since I believe a coma would be preferable to this current situation. Grace gives me a sly smile.
"Ana Grey, did you take your Percocet earlier than you are supposed to? All I have heard from you two girls is giggling." She is amused.
"Not at all. We are just being silly," I respond and Kate starts to laugh again. I am reminded of her fits of giggling whenever we would smoke pot in college.
"Oh, and that is why this family is so blessed. The both of you and Mia bring nothing but sunshine in our lives," She murmurs. I hear a certain amount of gratitude within her words as she kisses us both on the top of our heads.
Grace, we are all sitting underneath a dark cloud.
The doorbell chimes, Kate, and I look toward the entryway to see if it's Ray and I catch Christian looking at me. His face is undecipherable.
There she is. Dressed all in black as usual and waiting in the entryway as if she expects the party to rush to her. Grace excuses herself and heads to the old family friend. After a brief hug and two air kisses, Grace leads her into the room and Kate and I can hear Grace tell her that she will have to come and greet the guests of honor.
I feel Kate tense up and she sucks in a deep breath. I notice how Christian watched my expression as she entered the room and then turned his back as though he did not want the bitch to notice him.
Grace has led Cruella to where I am sitting with Kate and it is as if evil and cold air trails behind her. "Fuck me, sideways," Kate murmurs.
"Well, Elena, this is one half of the happy couple. I suppose my son is in the midst of the guests. Ana is taking it easy and not up to walking around to socialize."
I have no idea how the precious woman that is Grace Trevelyan Grey can like this...this...thing.
"Hello, Ana, dear. I do hope you are feeling better. I know what a scare that was for the family. Did you receive my flowers, dear?" Her face has been lifted so many times it is pulled tighter than a cat's asshole.
I must spend too much time scrutinizing the emotion I can see in her eyes, because Kate nudges my blue high heel. Cruella's eyes are ice-cold blue and any idiot can see that she despises me as much as I despise her. How is it possible that Kate and I are the only two people that see this?
I am so fucking done staying quiet around this bitch and no longer care who is around to witness it. I will figure this out.
"I do and I did," I practically hiss at her and keep my own blue eyes boring into hers.
My reply and reaction to Cruella causes Grace to look at me in surprise.
I feel Kate's shoulders slightly shake as she tries to stifle a laugh. The bitch chooses to ignore me and throws me her best fake smile. I think it is a smile; her face is so full of Botox it barely moves.
"I am so glad to hear that. You did give Christian quite a fright," She adds after grabbing a glass of champagne off a passing tray. She just had to throw in a little dig.
Grace looks at her with a frown and it gives pause to wonder if Grace is asking herself why Elena would say that to me. I can hear Kate snarl which averts Grace's gaze from me to Kate.
"Excuse me, dears. I see some people I should go speak with." Kate and I watch her slither away and it's not in Christian's direction. Shocking.
Grace looks me in the face. "Is there something I need to know, Ana?" She asks and if I manage this lie successfully, I deserve an Oscar.
"Grace, what do you mean?" I can play dumb.
"What just passed between you and Elena...it was...odd," Grace replies softly, not wanting anyone to overhear.
"Pshh...Odd does not cover it," murmurs Kate and now I watch confusion cloud Grace's face.
What, Grace? Was MY behavior inappropriate? Hers never is.
Katherine decides to take this opportunity and run with it.
"Ana, how in the world would she know if you gave Christian a fright? Better yet, why would she point it out to you?"
Kate has turned her hugely pregnant body toward me and purposely asked me in a suspicious manner. Grace's eyes dart between both of us, but before she can delve any further, the doorbell chimes and this time it is my daddy and his lovely girlfriend.
Grace helps me up from the sofa while Ray and Angela walk over and I hug them. For some reason, being around this man brings me comfort and even his scent is enough to calm me down. He is what love feels like. His embrace erases the insanity that is my life and takes me away from this…party…payback…this place.
"How's my Annie feeling? Are you doing better than when we talked earlier in the week?" He asks in a soft voice that he only used when I was sick and he brought me chicken noodle soup.
"Oh, daddy! I am feeling better.. But I will be honest; I know that this party is going to keep me in the bed for the next two days." Ray and Angela both laugh when I say this.
"Oh, that is wonderful news, Ana. When we came to the hospital that day, we were so worried. You looked like a small girl curled up in that bed. It took all I had not to cry." Angela tells me in a lovely and kind voice.
Angela is an attractive woman in her mid fifties and is a fifth grade teacher. I adore her and am so happy for the both of them.
Ray smiles at someone behind me and I hear Christian and Elliot greet him and they all shake hands.
"Son, it looks like you've been taking good care of my Annie. She doesn't look like she just had major surgery less than two weeks ago," Ray tells Christian and pats him on the shoulder.
Elliot reeks of alcohol before he opens his mouth. "Ray, you know the great CEO didn't care about anything other than work these two weeks. If anyone has nursed your daughter to health it has been her gorgeous brother-in-law." Elliot drunkenly roars at his own joke, which causes Ray to chuckle, and earns him a dirty look from his younger brother.
"Ray, we've all tried to care for this stubborn daughter of yours. Luckily, she is tougher than she looks and is healing quite quickly," Christian replies and then greets Angela.
"Well, I am grateful to you all for taking care of her. She sure had her old man worried. Now, where is the bar? You two are smashed so I know to follow you. I need a cold one."
Grace has appeared from out of nowhere and whisks Angela away to God knows where.
"Follow me Papa Steele. I shall lead the way." Elliot is so drunk the only place I can see him leading my daddy is into a wall.
"You good, Annie?" I nod and send him and my drunken brother-in-law on their merry way. I giggle as I watch daddy practically holding Elliot upright.
I feel Christian looking down at me, although I do not return his gaze. "Anastasia, how are you feeling? I assume it's not too good since you have been sitting with Kate for quite a while. Do you need to go back upstairs to rest?" Christian places his arm around my shoulder at the exact moment I watch Cruella stroll in front of us.
Looking up at my husband, I give him a beaming smile. He will not get the satisfaction of watching the effect she has on me.
"No, I'm good for now.. If you do notice that I am missing in action in a few minutes, I'll be upstairs. My medicine is due and I think I might lay down for a bit too."
"Okay, baby. If you need me, I will be back at the bar with our fathers and my extremely hammered brother," Christian says.
God, what I could do to you with a hammer.
"Try not to get into Elliot's condition. I do not believe I could get you upstairs and Taylor is not here to help you," I say softly.
"Jason needed to spend time with his Gail. We didn't need him anyway. You should find one of your bookworms that you employ and I'm going to continue to try and drink my father under the table."
Christian kisses the top of my head and strolls toward the drinking contest. I turn to make my way back to Kate, but she is no longer on the sofa, which means I will have to circulate the room or head upstairs. My luck has several guests hovering by the stairs and I'm forced to speak with them. Half of them ask if there is significance to our third anniversary and why we had a party. Laughing, I explain this party was an excuse Mia gave to throw a shindig. After the millionth time I say this, it's as if I conjured her up, because a flash of purple satin rushes my way. Mia is obviously tipsy but she remembers not to hug me too tightly.
"Ana! Are you having fun? This is just the best idea ever! I have been dancing my ass off! Oh, shit! How do you feel? This has not been too much for you has it?" I think my ear drums may burst from Mia's loud voice. Each word ran together in an alcohol infused tornado. I grin at her indulgently.
"Yes, sweet girl. I'm good. No need to worry. I've been sitting with Kate anyway. I just need to go upstairs and take my medicine," I reply to her vomit of words. Her tall frame looms over me and I find it funny as she sways due to the alcohol. She then suddenly she grabs both of my arms.
"That is sooo good, Ana! Listen! I am in heaven and the reason why is that I have been out under the pergola, making out with Kate's older brother, Ethan. He is outrageously hot! I cannot believe he lived with you two in college and you never tapped that ass!"
Mia says this so loudly a few people who are walking by snigger at her.
"Holy, fuck Mia! Don't let your lunatic brothers hear you say that shit! They'd beat poor Ethan to a pulp! Even if you are drunk and are funny as hell." Smiling at her, I pull her into a hug, careful not to hurt myself. You cannot help from loving Mia Grey.
To be that carefree and happy.
I watch Mia wobble her way outside to where Ethan must be, and make it the guestroom we have been staying in. I take my pain medication and lay down to rest. I can't help to pray that I fall asleep and wake up this party being over. I close my eyes and eventually feel my pain begin to dissipate. There is medication that eases physical pain and yet there is none to ease emotional pain. This pain. My pain. It comes and it goes. It is as delicate as every breath I take. Entering, interrupting and laying its claim inside this void I now have. I want to fight it and I am doing my best. However, there are times when I forget who to blame. Christian or my stupidity? Lying there a while longer, I pull myself up slowly so I can fix my face and lip-gloss. I gaze at my own reflection and practice another fake smile. Good job, Ana.
Back at the party, I search for Kate, who is nowhere to be found. Ray, Carrick, and Elliot are still at the bar and are miraculously capable of standing upright. My eyes catch Angela sitting with Grace and a few of Grace's friends. Then it occurs to me that Kate is not the only person I haven't seen. Looking back at the bar, I note that my husband is no longer there. From out of nowhere, it registers that Cruellais not slithering around either. I become more than suspicious. I go in search for at least one of them, but have no such luck. I go from room to room, but don't bother with the upper floors since Christian has one of his henchmen posted at the top of the stairs so that guests cannot access that area of the house. The last room I go in on this end of the house is the kitchen and the only people I find are the caterers. I am walking faster than I feel like and my eyes have narrowed as I head into the tent out back. I walk around the tent, but it is futile as well. My brow is furrowed as I think about the next logical location I should search.
Where in the fuck?
Oh, yes.
Perhaps the end of the house that Grace closed for the party. Since I'm already outside, I take the easy way that is through the back yard. I have barely made three steps on the lawn when I can feel the someone behind me and I know exactly whom it is.
"Have you been out here all night waiting to see if I leave the house, Luke or have you put a microchip in me?" I turn and ask him in an amused voice.
Towering above me and dressed in a suit like Christian demands, Luke gives me a look that conveys how fucking bored he has been.
"No, Ana, I haven't. I have alternated between walking the grounds and hanging out with the caterers since they keep giving me food. Oh, and I got the phone number of one hottie who works for them," Luke replies with a wicked grin.
"Luke Sawyer, you are such a horn dog! You'd better listen when I warn you you're going to catch something you can't wash off. Well, I guess it's time to trail your principle in the dark because I'm walking to the other side of the house." I sound annoyed with what I am doing.
"Pray tell, why are you going there?" He asks in a confused voice while he trails behind me like a puppy.
I choose to ignore him and take my heels off since they are sinking in the grass, but the grass is too damp so I decide to take the stone walkway. All I hear is crickets since Luke can somehow walk without making a sound. Then I notice that the windows of Grace's conservatory are all on. A shadow moves by the windows and I squint my eyes to see who it is. Luke grabs my elbow and pulls me back.
"What the fuck?" I whisper, looking irritated.
For some stupid fucking reason, Luke opens his jacket, reaches for his gun holster, and pulls out his Glock. I gape at him.
"Who in the hell are you planning to shoot? Have you lost your damn mind?" I am still whispering.
"Ana, I do not know who that is or what is going on. Get behind me," He orders me in an authoritative tone.
Yeah, I will get right on that Lucas Sawyer.
"Fuck that, Luke!" Walking faster so that I can see better, I make out the shadow.
Kate.
I turn to Luke and hiss at him, "It's just Kate!"
Speaking louder than I intended, Kate glances in our direction and sees me. For some reason, Kate raises her left arm and moves it in a gesture for me to go away. That is when I notice she is holding something in her right hand and is pointing it inside the conservatory. This just spurs me on and when Kate quickly looks at me again, she throws that same left arm up and holds her hand up for me to stop.
"What in the fuck is she doing?" Luke asks in a low voice. We are now beside one another.
"The question is what the fuck is in her hand?" I am so confused.
"It's lit up. It's her phone," Luke replies.
"What? What in the hell?
We walk until we are close enough to Katherine that we can hear her breathe. More important than that, we can hear people talking, and one voice I hear is Christian's.
Kate gives me a pained and sad look, but there is a hard and a murderous look glittering in her eyes. Luke noticed and tries to block my view, but I struggle from his grasp. Standing right behind Kate, we can see that it is in fact her phone. She is recording something. Kate puts her finger on her lips for us to stay quiet.
By God, if I hear Christian's voice, I am getting close enough to see who in the hell he is talking to.
I move a little and my shoulders are touching Kate's, who throws Luke a look that could mean get ready to hold me back. I recognize the voice of the person Christian is talking to before my eyes ever see her. I look at Kate and Luke after my gaze caught its prey. Luke finally sees them and moves right beside me and he raises an arm in front of me. Looking at him, I mouth, "Move it."
My husband's back is to us, he is holding a drink in his hand, and his head is hanging down. Standing very close to him with her back to us as well, is Cruella fucking de Ville and she is rubbing her hand down Christian's arm in a manner that borderlines on sexual.
I lean into Kate's ear and barely whisper, "How long have you been recording this?"
"Five minutes or so. She cornered him by the bathroom and I followed them down here. I've caught bits and pieces of what they are saying, but they are talking too low," She replies in a whisper softer than my own.
"Whatever happens, do not stop recording a second of this." Kate nods.
I make a silent step closer and Kate and Luke follow. This would be funny if it didn't feel so creepy. Just like conjoined triplets, we inch even closer and are now in the doorway. I do not know if it's because we are in the room or whether they are now speaking louder, but now every word they say is loud and clear.
"So does my little friend have her facts wrong, Christian? If she doesn't, then explain why have you been keeping all of this from me for years? Me, your closest friend in the world and the only person who really knows you." Elena purrs to Christian, whose head remains down and he doesn't reply.
"What the fuck is it to you, Elena? How is my life any of your fucking business? Explain why I have to tell you anything?" Christian sounds...odd.
The plastic bitch laughs loudly at his response and it shakes its head.
"So it IS true, then? Oh, how priceless, Christian! What did I say from the beginning of your delusional idea? Do you remember, love?" Her voice is loud enough for us to make out what she is saying, while her lips are to Christian's ear. I feel Kate's eyes on my face and I see that Luke is still holding that fucking gun although it is now pointed at the ground.
"Elena, yes,I remember and I don't give a fuck about what you had to say. That had shit to do with anything! In addition, why the fuck are you running around talking jack shit about me in the first fucking place. Are you blind to the damage that could bring down on me?" Christian does not sound odd anymore. He sounds fucking pissed.
Thank God, they have not moved and still have their backs to us.
The old hag laughs again and he turns to look at her. We all hold our breath. I know if we make the slightest movement, he will catch it in his peripheral vision.
"I am very glad that my life amuses you, Elena. If you laugh in my face one more..."
"You'll do what? That's right; you won't do a goddamn thing, Christian." She sneers at him.
I am truly shocked to the core that anyone has the nerve to speak to Christian this way. No one ever dares to speak out of line to the almighty Christian Grey.
"So tell me, does the little ninny have the slightest clue that her husband returned to his Dominant ways half a second after she married him?" She gloats.
Christian throws his glass against the wall and Kate and I both jump.
"What the fuck do you think? Do you see me walking up to Anastasia and announcing that I have been fucking and beating submissives practically our entire marriage? Do you think I'm fucking stupid, Elena?" He shouts.
Even though I already know this, hearing my husband say it feels like a punch in my gut.
Christian's anger does not faze the old family friend whatsoever and she continues laughing at him.
"You poor, clueless boy. Yes, I actually do think you're stupid. If I didn't know what a useless mouse of a girl your wife is, there might be a chance I would pity her. Why didn't you just divorce her, you fool? Don't get me wrong, I can't stand her, but do you have the slightest clue what you've been doing with her life? Or don't you care? Perhaps, she looks too much like your mommy?"Cruella asks him the question I have wanted to ask him as well.
Christian does not answer. He turns away from us again and places his arms on the wall in front of him. It looks as if he is holding it up.
She moves right behind him and she lays her hand on his back.
What the fuck is this? He lets her touch him?
"Christian? Christian! I asked you a question and now I demand that you answer me!" The authority she speaks to him with is mesmerizing to watch. This is like watching a soap opera.
Christian stands up and he grows taller. He turns to face her again and it places us in jeopardy of being caught. I swallow hard and watch Christian morph into the Christian I've seen many times. I see the fierce coldness about him just by staring at his profile. This is Christian the Dominant and the memories it brings feel like searing and green bile is rising in my throat.
"You seem to have forgotten that I am not a fifteen-year-old boy anymore. I no longer have to answer to you or anyone else in this world and you would be better off fucking remembering that! You do not bring me to heel any more, Elena! I'm staring at you as the Dominant that I am and I fucking stopped listening to you when I was twenty-one and no longer your submissive!" He roars at her.
Oh. My. God.
Kate, Luke, and I all gasp. We can't move and it's as though we are standing in cement. Then we watch Cruella face Christian. Her old and haggard ass that is wrapped in black saran wrap morphs the way we watched Christian's body do just moments ago. The bitch draws herself to her full height in an intimidating stance. Arrogant. Cold. Distant.
A Dominatrix.
Kate's eyes dart to me. She was right all along.
"Oh, yes, you stopped being my submissive and being ordered to kiss my boots, and you can pull out the Dom I MADE YOU and try to make me cower all you want, but don't be too sure of yourself. I have enough on you to take you down with a snap of my fingers. You think you scare me, little boy? You're a fucking joke if you think you can! Remember what I said, Christian Grey...you are only the Dominant that you are because I fucking showed you the way it was done. You were fifteen-years-old and I taught you things that you fucking love and everything that you now need. You wouldn't even have GEH if it wasn't for me and my money! You'd be a fucking loser, just like I always told you. So, next time you dare pull out that Dominant in you, Christian, fucking go back to that fucked up fifteen-year-old boy you were when you cleaned my yard," She hisses at him.
Neither of them back away and they are locked in a staring contest that appears to be over who has the strongest Dom.
However, for me, and perhaps for Kate and Luke, I finally and really heard what Christian had already said.
Fifteen-year-old boy. Christian had been a fifteen-year-old child that this horrible creature molested into a BDSM lifestyle. Katherine is still recording every minute of this life-altering event. This Greek tragedy.
I am immediately struck with the force of this truth and my hands fly to my mouth. All of this time. His mother's best friend. Staying out until nearly midnight. With the pedophile that had made him into the monster he is today. Whatever remained of my love for him shatters into a million different pieces.
Before I'm aware and without even making a conscious decision, I head toward the two sick masters of BDSM who are having some sort of disgusting DOM showdown. I feel Luke try to grab my elbow before my presence is known, but I yank it away.
I square my shoulders and raise my head up high as I go to meet these two versions of the devil. One who is astoundingly beautiful physically and one whose disgusting ugliness breaks through her physically.
Neither scares nor intimidates me. They merely sicken me. Disgust me. Repulse me.
Christian and Elena are still looking at one another. His expression demonstrates rage, but an almost intimidated rage. Its expression is one of amusement at her prodigy and it actually appears as if she is turned on. I watch as her eyes look down and settle on Christian's cock as he snarls at her.
They never hear me approach.
I speak with a strength I do not believe I have ever felt and my voice is as hard and detached as a cold day in hell.
"Elena, from the moment I laid eyes on you I knew you were something that only the devil could conjure up, but for the life of me, I would have never guessed you were a pedophile who had spent six years molesting the fifteen-year-old son of your best friend." I had not intended to scream at them but I am lit up by hell.
Christian and Cruella's heads swing in my direction so fast I nearly laugh. The horrified look in her face is picture perfect and Christian looks completely shocked, his face drained of all blood.
I continue stalking toward them while they continue gaping at me.
I have crossed my arms, am face to face with the creature I married, and look into his pathetic gray eyes.
"So this old family friend and business partner is who taught you how to swing a cane and beat women? A fucking child molester, Christian? YOUR molester? How long did I hear you say it went on for? Oh, yes. Until you were twenty-one. In addition, you kissed her boots. Who would have thought the big, bad CEO of Grey Enterprises Holdings, Inc was a boot kissing submissive?" I laugh bitterly.
"Christian, you were this old hag's little bitch. You do know that, right? Moreover, you still are. You. Are. A. Little. Bitch."
Christian's face continues to pale and he opens his mouth to speak only to snap it back shut and then he goes to grab my arm. I snatch it away and regard him with contempt.
"You will never touch me again. Not for the rest of your fucking existence, Christian Grey," I snarl at him.
The old bitch has obviously gotten over her initial horror and she is laughing. It is the most annoying sound I've ever heard.
"My, my. It's the little and stupid, Ana. I don't think he's wanted to touch you for a long time..."
"SHUT UP, ELENA! Not another fucking word better come out of your mouth!" Christian cuts her off before she tells me what I already know. What a fucked up pair of individuals.
I can own your ass Grey.
"Yeah, Elena, You'd better shut up and remember whose house you're standing in. Grace might hear you." I taunt them and I start to feel a raging inferno of hatred rising inside of me.
Christian reaches for me once again. "Ana, listen, I don't know what you think you..." I jerk away once more.
I realize that I have terrified him by pointing out that Grace could find this out.
"Fuck you, Grey! Get your sick, perverted hands off of me," I hiss at him.
I see anger replacing the terror that had been in his eyes and I turn my attention back to the pedophile.
"You are a truly abhorrent excuse for a human being. How many other teenage boys you molested and turned into sadistic bastards? I won't refer to you as Cruella de Ville anymore. Your new name will reflect what you really are, a fucking pedophile," I shout in her face.
"Shut that shit up, Ana! It was not like that at all. It helped me and Elena is not a fucking pedophile!" Christian is screaming at me now and that is when Luke enters the room.
Christian watches Luke standing with his hands folded in front of him and Luke is wearing that impassive expression he has.
"Sawyer, go back outside. Mrs. Grey doesn't need you at the moment." Christian tells him in a condescending manner.
"I disagree with that statement," Luke replies. Did anyone else notice he didn't refer to Christian as, 'Sir"?
That is when Christian sees Katherine and once he realizes that she is recording this, he points his finger at her, his face blood red with rage.
"Get in here, Katherine and give me that fucking phone! I. Said. Now." The monster without his control has jumped the fence at the zoo.
Christian is so full of rage that you can see every vein on his head and neck popping out while he screams at his brother's wife.
Kate doesn't move. Smirking at Christian, she holds her phone out further. "Say cheese, Grey. I even have it on zoom." Her words venomous, although spoken as she gives him an All American smile.
Christian makes a move in her direction, but Luke gets in his way and stares him down. Christian's face is hard and it is obvious these two men are a breath away from being in an outright brawl.
I am positive Luke is no longer employed.
Christian steps to the side of Luke and stares at Kate. His words are as hard and cold as his eyes. He is tearing at his hair with both of his hands.
Out of control, Christian?
"Katherine, you will sign an NDA and you will sign it tonight," He spits out at her.
"I'm not signing shit, Grey. Have you had your pedophile lover sign one?" Kate uses her chin to point at Cruella.
"Tsk, tsk, Christian. Such obnoxious women who now feel as if they have an ounce of power and control over you, surround you. In addition, it appears they feel they have some power over me as well. Both of you little girls need a cane across your back and I bet you would shut your fucking mouths. No, I would shut you bitches up with a ball gag. Do you even know who you are messing around with?"
Kate throws her head back as she howls in laughter.
"Yeah, you sick whore! We know exactly who we are messing with. A plain old HAIRDRESSER! A woman who went to a low class cosmetology school to learn how to perm and color hair. If it were not for this bastard brother-in-law of mine and the money he gives you hand over fist, you would be cutting hair in some low level beauty shop in fucking Bremerton, and after each hair cut your repulsive self would have to sweep the hair up with a fucking broom. Probably the broom you fly around on. You see Elena, who we are messing with is you, and you are nothing but a two bit disgusting joke!"
I think she looks shocked that Kate has just shot her with buckshot, but its face is so stiff from too many Botox injections that it is hard to tell. Christian's dumb ass is just standing there as his eyes dart between the three people who could potentially expose the worst secret of his life.
Only Katherine isn't finished. "Another thing, you plastic whore. Your last name may still be Lincoln, but that's because after your husband threw you away for an improved and younger model, you chose to keep his name for social standing. Your name being Lincoln doesn't do shit for your social standing nor is anyone impressed with your three little beauty shops. You walk around dressed to the nines and are only able to wear that two carat diamond ring on your scrawny finger is due to the dumb fuck named Christian Grey. His money and his gross name get you in parties like this one tonight. If Christian were not paying you like the whore that you are, people would walk over your homeless body while you lay out in the gutter. Fuck both of you! You sick fucks deserve each other!"
My husband is resting his hands on the back of a sofa and is staring down. He appears to be defeated. A man lost at sea. I want to spit in his face.
As for her, it decides to turn her attention and verbal attack on me. A long and bony finger is pointed at me.
"As for you, Ana…Anastasia, the idiot of Seattle! You are a weakling. A pathetic little bookworm who has been watching as I walk all over you with your husband's consent for your entire relationship! Were you too afraid to confront me while you waited for Christian or afraid of what Christian and his needs would take over and do to you? You tiny, little coward. If you could not even take a paddle from Christian, do you think you could take me on? What a fucking joke of a little girl!" Elena screams.
"Elena, that is enough. Shut your goddamn mouth and quit speaking that way to Anastasia," Christian tells her.
That son of a bitch sick fuck told her about what he did. She probably knew every horrible and sick thing I allowed him to do to me. That is what they probably stayed out at night discussing-how to make your bitch behave. I keep my eyes locked on the pedophiles and as she glares at me. I know she thinks she's scaring me with her size.
Finally, Luke opens his mouth and looks me in the eye and I see that his eyes are filled with a dangerous edge around them. "Do. Not. Listen. To. This. Dried. Up. Whore." He tells me.
Luke's resolve envelopes me and whatever fog of insecurity it attempted to confuse me with is lifted.
"Bitch, oops, sorry, I meant pedophile. If you are trying to intimidate me with the fact that you are as tall and as wide as a Green Bay fucking Packer, you are out of your sick child molesting mind," replying to its words that were meant to break me.
Kate laughs. "Ana, you're right. She is the size of a linebacker. I had never noticed that! Sick child molesting linebacker!" She spits out.
"Enough with calling her..." That is my husband as he begins to defend this creature.
"Shut the fuck up, Christian! The fact that you are defending a woman who molested and abused you for six years is disgusting enough, but the fact that you call her you're only friend and are in business with her is just fucking revolting. Your mother's BEST FRIEND‼ She's had her claws in you for what, fifteen years? But you are still her little bitch, aren't you?"
Disgust has painted my eyes. My abdominal pain has increased and is exuding throughout my body, but the hatred for this woman overpowers my thinking. This is what bloodlust tastes like.
Remind me to thank Ray for sending me to those self-defense classes.
I grab hold of her hair, pull her head down to me, take my foot, and slam it on the inside of her right knee, causing her leg to go out from under her. It cries out in pain. I raise her face slightly and punch it twice, once near its left eye and then its nose and we all hear it easily break, weakened by too many nose jobs.
"I'm a weakling? I can't take your skank ass on, you goddamn whore? Then stand up and fight me, Mistress! Wipe your blood off my fucking hands and arms! FUCK YOU!" Whatever noise I am speaking to her with is past a scream. It is a primal, visceral hatred and it is coming from the back of my throat in a howl.
Christian has made a valiant attempt to protect his only friend, although I landed every punch while he was trying to pull me away.
For my last act of humiliation, I knee it in the gut and drag it toward the door to the backyard by its hair. It is screaming and cursing loudly while it orders her little bitch to get me off her.
"Anastasia! Stop! Stop! Calm the fuck down, Ana. This isn't YOU!" HE is yelling at me while I fight and scramble from his reach. Christian's words spur me on. I have the strength of one-hundred men as hell laps around my ankles.
Suddenly, this scene of honest to God insanity is brightly illuminated as all the lights to the back yard have been turned on. We are surrounded by Christian's security team who had their guns drawn and only holster them once they see who we all are.
Or who we all used to be.
We will never be the same again.
Kate's voice is miles away and begging me to stop. Luke and Christian are manhandling me, but I am rabid and out of my mind. Whether it is just adrenaline or raw hatred, neither of them cannot restrain me or stop me from pulling the pedophile farther in the yard by her hair. With her old ass lying face down on the grass, I spit on her and then I hear that thing calling for Christian to stop me. Christian has me by the waist in an attempt to get me under control. I feel the words that are warm but loud next to my ear and they beg me to calm down.
However, I am incapable of calming down. I stomp my foot in the middle of its back and it cries out and when I realize that the arms around my waist are those of Christian Grey, I scream as though I am being murdered. It is only then that a sharp and nearly incapacitating pain where I had surgery roars through me and I yelp out from the pain. I scream at this stranger named Christian Grey that he is hurting my abdomen by the grip he has on me and he automatically releases me.
"Sit down, Anastasia. Please. You have probably re injured yourself, so, just please, please sit down and take some deep breaths. Please, calm down. We will sort this shit out, I swear." Christian murmurs softly.
Christian is speaking to me as though I am a child and has the nerve to stroke my hair. The red aberration in my eyes immediately clears and I look at this person in astonishment. A person who is beautiful and who I lost myself in whenever I looked in his eyes. But my heart obscured who this person actually is. I raise a hand that is covered in the blood of his child molester and watch his beautiful face swing to the other side from my blow. I have now marked him with her blood as my hand covered his cheek with it. But then again, he was already covered in it, wasn't he? Resigned to my disgust, he walks away and orders the members of his security team to leave.
Christian begins walking around in circles and tearing at his hair with both hands and is muttering words to himself. I finally give into the pain, bend over, and am taking in huge gulps of air. Luke is squatting beside me and saying something, but my brain cannot comprehend it. I no longer hear Kate's voice, so I straighten up to look for her. My God, the woman still has sense enough about her that she is still recording this monumental event of brief psychosis.
It groans and turns onto its back and calls out for Christian.
Then I see something I will never forget as long as I live. Christian Grey, the man I married on May 12, 2012, bends down to help his child molester up.
I will kill him. I. Am. Going. To. Fucking. Kill. Christian. Grey.
I will never be able to tell you what happened. People bore witness to what I tried to do, but my eyes never saw a thing. The only thing I know is that watching Christian go to that thing in order to help it drove me over that tiny ledge I was barely teetering on.
Luke and Katherine told me what I did. My eyes and my mind can never see it clearly. It lives inside my head behind a haze of rage, hate, and a thirst for vengeance. But it remains hidden.
Luke was holding me up when I whipped around, reached inside his jacket, and got my hands on his gun. His large and strong hands nearly had a hold of my wrists, but they wet from the damp grass and its blood. My bare feel slipped on the dampened grass, but I somehow managed to not fall over. I nearly had Luke's gun raised and pointed at Christian. Seconds from shooting my husband, my heavily pregnant friend and Luke grabbed me, screaming my name and frantically wrestling the gun from my hands.
I will sometimes attempt to trace it all in my mind, but only hear faint screams and yelling as Christian told my very pregnant best friend to move out of the way before she got hurt. I vaguely recall the voices of Luke and Christian blasting in my ears as they fought me until Luke's strong and solid power overpowered me and tore the gun from my hands.
My consciousness will always feel Luke holding me while Kate weeps and caresses my face and hair. It will always smell of blood. I will barely recall my husband sitting on the grass with his knees bent and head hanging between them, both hands pulling on his hair.
None of us were aware of what would happen seconds later.
How those few seconds were about to change everything.
The voice of a man. The voice of a confused and angry man.
Demanding to know what in the fuck was going on.
Why did I hear screaming?
Why is Elena Lincoln in my back yard and struggling to stand with blood all over her?
Why is Ana's dress torn and why is she covered in blood, Christian?
Luke, what in the hell has gone on down here?
However, the most damning question that would forever seal fate… Katherine, whose phone is on the ground?
It all happened so fast and yet…so slow.
Carrick.
Kate, terrified, wide-eyed, and incapable of answering Carrick.
Katherine. That phone's red recording light is on.
Someone explain this fucking shit to me.
My incessant and soul scraping sobs.
The stuttering mumbles of the pedophile accusing me of assaulting her.
Carrick demands answers from his mute and youngest son who blankly stared at Katherine's phone that is now in his father's hand.
Carrick's youngest son, knowing what it meant for him and his entire family.
Rushing down the yard in a red dress that not long ago could have signified beauty, or manipulation, or being lied to for the past fifteen years by her best friend and youngest son.
Grace.
Her questions.
Ana, are you hurt?
Katherine, why is Ana bleeding?
Why is Ana's dress torn?
Luke, what has happened?
Noticing her husband, son, and best friend at the end of the back yard.
Running to them.
Her red dress.
All I know is Luke carrying me as he held onto Kate's arm so that she wouldn't fall.
We made it to the tent.
The house is now dark.
Luke sat down with me wrapped in his arms with Kate beside us, her head on Luke's shoulder.
We all knew what was about to happen down there.
It had been hiding in plain sight for fifteen-years.
Guilt? Highly doubtful.
Retribution? For one who is unwilling to be a victim?
Time marches on, as we sit there not sure what we should do.
A bomb on the far end of the yard.
Then we heard it.
Katherine's hands covered her ears.
Sobbing against Luke's neck.
In the distance.
Shouting. Screaming. Yelling.
Grace.
Her cries of one simple word…
Why?
A friendly reminder from Anna-Y'all don't PM me or leave a review and say, "Anna, you lied and said the Grey family wouldn't be hurt from finding out about Christian being a Dominant and still a part of a BDSM lifestyle along with the subs or why Ana has left."
Because I have not lied about that.
Sorry if it took you two hours to read this.