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Chapter 2: Strider and the Hobbs

The troop left the next morning for Rivendell, and was making good progress. On the fifth day, Strider led them through a swamp, filled with flies, fish, and plenty of mosquitoes. But to cheer up their swampy and saddened spirits, Strider caught a deer just like he had promised them. Unfortunately, he broke the other promise by the way he cooked it. The poor Hobbs tried not to rip their teeth out when biting into it.

"You overdid it this time, Strider," Frodo said, not meaning as a compliment while he ripped out another hunk of meat.

"It was nothin' at all, Frods," Strider said, slapping him on the back, "I'm glad ya like it."

"Whoever said anything about liking this rock-hard uneatable stuff?" Merry mumbled, picking at a too tough piece.

"Ouchies," Frodo winced as he rubbed his sore back.

"Now, dudes," Strider said, "let's not cry and complain. There aren't no black guys yet, and we've done good so far."

"It's 'There aren't any black guys yet', and 'we've done well so far,' " Frodo pointed out.

"Oh would ya shaddap wit da gramma, Frods? I'm gettin' kinda sick of dem," Strider said.

"Why should I?" Frodo asked. "I'm sick of you and the way you talk. I'm not taking to it too kindly."

"Well that's just goodie gumdrops for youu," Strider said, throwing his hunk of meat away. "Now let's all get some nice an' good rest, you're gonna need it for tamarra."
"We're gonna need it for what?" Merry asked. "I didn't understand what you just said."

"I said," Strider answered "We're gonna need it for TOMORROW." He annunciated the last word.

"Oh," Merry said, making a bed for himself, "well, excuse moi for not understanding you."

"Dat's okay," Strider grinned, slapping him on the back this time.

"Youchers!" Merry cried, jumping about ten feet in the air.

"Tee hee hee," Pippin giggled, wrapping his cloak up.

"Hey, that's not nice," Merry complained, rubbing his back.

"Thank goodness it wasn't me this time," Frodo said.

For the next few days the troop kept traveling towards Rivendell without any sign of the black whackos at all. They walked through woods, fields, and hills, and not having any fun whatsoever, the hobbits were getting tired and impatient.

"Are we almost there?" Pippin kept asking, which drove Strider to a point of almost sheer insanity. One day he was so fed up with Pippin that he said bluntly, "Look, Pippin, I'll tell you when we're there; just quit askin' an' shuttup, would ya? Yer makin' me insane! Do ya want me ta go insane? I wouldn't know where I was goin', and you'd all be lost forever!"

The four hobbits looked at each other.

"You're not insane already?" Frodo asked.

"Yeah, you sure act like it," Sam said. His suspicion of Strider was finally confirmed, and he felt victorious. "As I said earlier," he continued, "how do we know if Strider's a friend of Gandalf's?"

"Gandalf's not my friend," Frodo said, now disliking Strider even more.

"Hey," Sam said, "that's not what you're supposed to say. You're supposed to say-"

"I know what I have to do, Sam," Frodo said with his teeth clenched.

"But that part comes later in the movie," Sam said.

"Whatever," Pippin said.

"Now my brave hobbits," Strider said, his way of speaking changed, "I will not say do not weep, for not all tears are an evil."

"Eh?" Frodo said, completely sure that Strider was crazy.

"Wait a minute," Sam said, "that was Gandalf's line! Who do you think you are, anyway?"

Strider looked at them all, and then said, "I am Aragorn, son of Arathorn, the lost king of Gondor. I am sorry for acting like I did. I wanted to see how you would react to my behavior before I could trust you."

"We are no spies," Frodo said, relieved that Aragorn was a friend.

"Don't you steal my lines, you horrible hobbit!" Aragorn yelled.

"Whatever," Frodo shrugged.

"No, it's not whatever, stop taking my lines, or I'll send you to back to the Black Riders!" Aragorn was fuming now.

"All right, all right, I'll stop, don't get all sensitive about it," Frodo said.

"Okee dokee, ponderosee," Aragorn agreed.

"Ponder what?" Merry asked.

"Never mind," Aragorn said, rolling his eyes in annoyance.

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