Author's note: Well… here's another chapter, I'm a bit apprehensive about writing it actually, I wasn't even planning on writing it tonight, but I woke up at about 1.30 a.m. after being viciously bitten by mosquitoes. It's now 2.30, so here goes nothing.

Disclaimer: I own nothing of Harry Potter nor the devilishly handsome Sirius Black.

1.12 p.m.

Friday

I have just discovered a conspiracy.

I know that it's dangerous to tell you this, Fleas, but someone has to know and understand.

They may come after you.

They may even torture you.

But this is unbelievably serious and important.

I wouldn't endanger you otherwise, my friend.

The school's chicken may be made of carrots!

Are you as shocked as I am?

Yes, I know, it's horrifying.

I came across this discovery mere minutes ago.

You see, I was innocently eating, when I noticed that the chicken had a strange orange tinge.

It was even floating in orange liquid.

I tried to warn them.

But they wouldn't listen!

Me: The chicken is orange!

Moony: So?

Me: It's made of carrots!

Moony: There are other reasons for a chicken to be orange, Sirius.

Prongs: You can't make a chicken out of carrots.

Me: Yes, you can! Don't you see? I've uncovered one of the school's largest secrets!

Prongs: Eh?

Me: What they do, is they get Hagrid to grow the carrots to enormous size-

Wormtail: Can't they just enlarge the carrots?

Me: Hush! My theory's more complicated! And whilst the carrots are being grown, they feed them Potions so that the ones who eat their foul little carrots will believe that it's actually chicken! And when the carrot is big enough, they harvest it and slowly carve it into the shape of a chicken!

Silence.

Me: (gasp) All of you could be under the evil tasting-like-chicken-spell-even-though-it's-actually-carrots Potion! You! (I pointed to Prongs) What's your Animagus form!

Prongs: A stag.

Me: I knew it! The carrots have been spying on us! Release my best mate you evil carrot!

Prongs: (sighs) Padfoot, this is getting ridiculous. I- I … aiyaiyai…. (trails off as Lily walks to us, one hand messes his hair.)

Lily: Are you done with the chicken? We want some over there.

Prongs: (Strange look in eye.) What's it to you, Evans?

Lily: (Shoots him disgusted look and steps further away.) Sod off, Potter.

Moony: Here, Lily. (Takes evil platter of chicken.)

Lily: Thanks, Remus.

Me: Stop! The chicken isn't what it seems!

Lily: (gives me strange look and walks away.)

Me: Or Prongs could really just be himself. (Even a carrot wouldn't act so stupid around Evans.)

Moony: You think?

Me: No need to get all snippy.

Moony: It seems a lot simpler to just buy a chicken.

Wormtail: Aren't there live chickens around Hagrid's hut?

Me: They are forcing us to eat carrots! Carrots are evil! They turn your skin orange!

Prongs: Ungh. (Still staring at Lily.)

Moony: Have you ever heard of the dish, Orange Chicken? You know, where they cook the chicken with oranges and orange sauce or something?

Me: That's just what they want you to think!

Wormtail: Who's they?

Me: They.

Wormtail:… right.

Me: I must stop this conspiracy! I proceed to the one person who I know will take this situation seriously!

1.23 p.m.

McGonagall has just kicked me out of her office.

1.26 p.m.

She gave me a jar of Ginger Newts to stop banging at her door.

But I will not be bribed!

My strive for justice will continue!

Right after I finish eating these.

11.03a.m.

Saturday

I'm bored.

D'you want to know why I've been reduced to this sad state of boredom, Fleas!

Because Prongs is moping over what ickle Lily said about him!

Come off it! Their both overreacting!

It's not like we did anything that horrible!

You know… just kind of scaring the Slytherin first years by hovering them above the lake.

It's not like we were going to leave them there forever or anything!

Maybe just a few hours!

And even if the Hovering Charm did wear off, (as she so hysterically pointed out.) it's not like they can't swim, can't they?

I mean, I'm pretty sure they can live long enough to get to the edge off the lake.

I think.

Erm…

Well, even if they couldn't, there's always the Giant Squid.

See? She was completely blowing the entire thing out of proportion.

Hmph.

I tried to talk some sense into her, but nooo, she just kept going on and on about how cold it was, honestly, it's only January!

Besides, everyone knows that pneumonia builds character.

Now, I'm stuck with a sulky mate who's sitting in a corner and staring at a crack on a wall just because some girl called him a worthless git who repulsed and disgusted her with his very presence.

Merlin, it's just… sad to watch him! Really! He looks like this puppy that's been kicked.

Repeatedly.

Lord, I can't take this.

Something has to be done.

And I, Sirius Orion Black will do it!

Once I figure out what it is, that is.

3.45 p.m.

I think he's getting better.

At least he's not mumbling to himself anymore… just kind of… sitting there with his mouth slack.

Wait, he's talking!

Hallelujah!

…

Oh for God's sake.

This is how the bloody conversation went. First thing he says in 4 whole hours, and this is how it went.

Prongs: D'you think she hates me?

Me: Ahm… (Blinks… after all, even brilliant geniuses such as I don't know what to say all the time, right?) Err… no?

Prongs: (Looks very hopeful. It was pathetic, his eyes became all big and round.) Really? You really think so?

Me: Umm… Is this a trick question?

Prongs: (Looks depressed.)

Me: (realises mistake.) No! I mean, really! She doesn't hate you, in fact… I'd even go so far as to say she… fancies… you…

Prongs: (Huge hopeful puppy dog eyes) You sure?

Me: Absolutely! You can see the love she has for you in the way she…. She…

I trailed off then. What was I supposed to say? In the way she screams at you day and night? The way she said that she'd rather go out with the Giant Squid? The way she ignores him when she's too annoyed?

Prongs: (Still looking hopeful.)

Me: …she… likes to eat strawberries!

Prongs: (looks confused) Likes to eat strawberries? What does that have to do with me?

Me: Ahm… I heard her say they reminded her of you?

(Conveniently forgot to mention that she's allergic to them. So… in a way, it's true, right?)

Prongs: (cheered up and smiled.) Wanna go eat?

Me: (Very relieved, thought the whole 'woe is me' ordeal was over.) Sure, what you thinking of getting?

Prongs: (smiles is silly manner.) Strawberries.

Save me, Fleas. Save me.

4.21 p.m.

Have newly developed hate for strawberries.

However, managed to make heroic escape while Prongs was feeding those evil little fruits to Moony and Wormtail.

What's this?

Why is there a piece of paper clipped between your pages?

Fleas, are you hiding something from me?

There's a secret affair going on with you and some girl's diary isn't there?

Aww! My little Fleasie! All grown up!

Oh… wait, that's just the poem I found while rummaging through Prongs's table.

Let me write it to you so you can feel as nauseated as I feel.

And I don't just mean from the strawberries.

Ode to Lily

(I can't believe him! Not even supporting my campaign against this unfairness!)

The fiery temptress with titian hair,

Those emerald green eyes that just don't care.

(What the bloody hell is titian? If I didn't know he was madly in love with her, I'd say he was gay! What's with all the reference to emeralds? Can no one else see that they're just a bunch of stupid rocks that've been put under pressure?)

She graces the hallways day by day,

Like the blooming flowers in spring fresh May.

(Come off it. Her name is Lily. Lily is a Death flower! Doesn't that mean anything!) (A/N I have nothing against lilies, in fact, I adore them, saved a bunch from the school's garden when they were being uprooted.)

That posture, that grace, that quickening pace,

Sets my undying heart with love ablaze.

(I'm going to throw up from the sheer soppiness of it all.)

Won't you give me a chance?

Won't you see?

That you and I

Were meant to be.

(I'm not even going to say anything.)

Why won't you forgive my sins that do not last?

Why must you constantly relive the past?

(He's exaggerating, sins is such a strong word! Is he still thinking about the 5th year? The nurse said that he'll stop reciting sonnets in a few months!)

Why is it that always for me,

Never a smile despite my plea?

(Now there's not entirely true. I remember her laughing when he slammed into a wall 'cause he was too busy staring at her.)

I try to tease, I try to ease,

But oh so rarely do I please.

(More like never.)

Won't you give me a chance?

Won't you see?

That you and I

Were meant to be.

My fair white Lily, the flower of Death,

Yet your every smile, my every breath.

(He musn't breath a lot must he? Really must learn that from him one day.)

You're the sun of my day, the moon of my night,

Your breathtaking beauty sets rooms alight.

(The soppiness has just gone over the meter.)

But while your joy comes with effortless ease,

You tears too flow when I least please.

(That's only partly true, usually, she's too busy screaming at us to cry.)

Wish I could to murder the bane,

To throttle his neck and pummel his brain,

(I'll join you! Is it Snivellus? Or Diggory?)

But with sinking heart and fear to see,

I realise that the idiot is actually me.

(Oh.)

Who would ever have thought my mate James was a poet?

A disgustingly sweet one at that.

Girls will probably love this kind of junk.

Wait a minute…

Wait one cotton picking minute…

I, Sirius Orion Black, have just had a miraculous brainstorm!

But I won't tell!

All great plans must be kept secret lest it be leaked out!

But then again… all great plans deserve names.

Give me some time, I, with my fantastic naming ability, shall find a suitable name for my amazing scheme!

Isn't that right, Fleas?

8.39 a.m.

I know it's early, but names like this just CAN'T wait!

Are you ready for it?

You sure?

Be prepared to be awed!

Rebel Sheep Say Moo!

Thank you, thank you. No autographs please!

A/N: Well? I really didn't know what I was typing about here. But it's taken me 1 and a half hours. Appreciate it. I'm going to sleep in a few minutes, so I'll just babble now. That poem was the piece of paper James passed up as homework last time, and I think Sirius's plan is pretty obvious, right? Anyway, guess! But if you do, I may or may not tell you if you're right.

I wrote the poem during history class, made it as soppy as I could. Truth be told, I'd probably have liked it if someone else said it to me, I'm a hopeless idiot when it comes to romantic stuff. Anyway, I'm pretty sure there's a dish called Orange Chicken or something. Can't remember. Never was too good at cooking. Seriously, I can bake muffins, cakes and stuff (I like baking every once in a while), but I can't even cook a packet of Instant noodles.

Anywho, let's have a few nominations, shall we? You guys tell me what you want from Bring It On (my other story, NOT THE CHEERLEADING MOVIE) in this story, and we'll vote on it in the next chapter, kay? You'll need two nominations to have it passed. Sooo… just leave your review, and say like… Nominate: Andrea/ Nominate: WEB

Something like that, if most of you nominate the same thing, then I'll just pass it. God, I love this democratic stuff! I feel so grown up!

By the way, what's all the nomination things? You know, like the authors will say, thank you one and all for nominating me for the golden Quill award! What's that? Or the rest of it, for that matter?

Before I forget! We owe two VERY important reviewers for this chapter! I present to you Queen of Zan! She generously gave me the Rebel Sheep Say Moo! I don't know if you wanted me to use the name like this, but it seemed so Siriusy! Was it meant to be a name, actually?

Next! FreckledIrishMaidenShe is the magnificent reason as to why you got to read about chicken and carrots! It was her exceedingly Sirius-ish idea! I hope that I didn't maul you idea beyond belief. Sorry if it was disappointing.