Chapter 30: Setting Boundaries

The next evening came, and it was time for Elizabeth and Little Jack to go to the Grant house for dinner. Elizabeth was especially nervous for some reason. Maybe it was because of the fact that, technically speaking, she and Nathan had not finished their conversation on Sunday and he said that they would talk at dinner. As of that moment, Elizabeth knew that she professed her love for him but had no idea of where things stood for Nathan. "But it had to be a good sign if he and Allie were inviting them to dinner, right?" she thought to herself. She checked herself in the mirror one last time, took a deep breath, and, with the dessert basket in one hand and Little Jack's hand in the other, they headed down the pathway to the Grant's house.

Allie greeted the Thorntons at the door with a warm smile. She gave Little Jack a hug and grabbed the dessert basket and his hand as well. Allie placed the dessert basket on the counter. She informed them that the dinner was in the oven and that it would take about an hour to bake. Elizabeth glanced at the table and saw that everything was all set to go for their meal. Allie followed her gaze and asked if she could take Jack outside to play while they waited for dinner to finish. Elizabeth nodded, and Allie took Little Jack by the hand, and the two went to the backyard.

Elizabeth looked at Nathan, and he smiled, gestured towards the front door, and asked, "It's a beautiful evening. Would you like to go sit on the front steps and talk?" Elizabeth smiled and nodded in return, walked outside and sat on the steps.

They sat next to one another in silence for a few moments. Finally, Nathan turned to Elizabeth and spoke, "I want to thank you for what you told me the other day, your openness and vulnerability. It means a lot that you shared it with me. I know it must have taken a lot of courage to do that, and the fact that you followed your instincts and did that is commendable. "

Elizabeth smiled at Nathan and gazed out at the town before them. She was trying to find a way to respond, something to say in return, but she was at a loss for words. Nathan saw that she was struggling for words and stepped in and said, "Elizabeth, this doesn't have to change the way we interact with one another." She turned and looked at him, searching for the meaning behind his comment. "Nathan, I saw you on Sunday at the cafe with Fiona. I know that there is something there between you two. Just like you did, I will step aside. I'm just not sure how to navigate through this... these feelings. How did you do it? ", Elizabeth stared at Nathan with eyes that seemed to be grasping for answers.

Nathan looked off towards the town and let out a hearty laugh, and then met Elizabeth's eyes again. "Why on earth would you think that Fiona and I have something going on? She and I are friends, Elizabeth, nothing more. ", he answered, intently, looking at her. Elizabeth got a puzzled look on her face and went to speak, but stopped herself for a moment as if she was thinking of something

else. "But, you were holding hands in the cafe. I saw it, Nathan. You don't hold friends' hands like that if there isn't an interest there.", she pointed out to him. Nathan turned to fully face Elizabeth and in a clear and direct tone, spoke to her, "Elizabeth Thornton, yes, my friend Fiona, reached out her hand to see if I was alright, because during the conversation that we were having, I had mentally checked out. It was not a gesture of intimacy or affection whatsoever."

Elizabeth stared at Nathan for a moment, at a loss for words. She wanted, needed, more clarification of what this new information meant for them. If there could even be a "them". She shuddered in her spot. "Are you cold?" Nathan asked, noticing the shudder. Elizabeth shook her head, still scrounging for words.

She took a deep breath, faced Nathan, and inquired, "Nathan, you just said that this doesn't have to change the way we interact with one another. What does that mean? You just made a point to clarify that what I saw on Sunday in the cafe was not a developing couple but a gesture from one friend to another. I opened my heart to you on Sunday, and although I probably deserve a delayed response, I really need to know. Where do you stand with what I told you? "

Nathan held Elizabeth's gaze for a moment. This is a place he wished they were two years ago. The open conversation that they were having right now and the hearts that were ready to commit But in reality, as much as he did love Elizabeth and wanted her very much in his and Allie's lives for the rest of their lives, he was leery too. He wanted to proceed cautiously this time. Granted, life was short, but this time, his heart was a bit more guarded.

Nathan closed his eyes momentarily and said a silent prayer for continued wisdom and guidance. Elizabeth sat staring at him, waiting for his response. After another moment of silence, he spoke, "Elizabeth, what you said the other day, about your feelings? Actually, hearing the fact that you feel the same way that I do... I am not going to hide it. I am in love with you too. But Elizabeth, I am going to be honest with you also. I can't and won't jump into a full relationship, not yet at least. Right now, you may want more than I can give you emotionally. It would hurt too much if anything happened like it did before and Allie and I lost you all over again. "

Elizabeth shook her head and responded, "But it wouldn't Nathan. I wouldn't let that happen." Nathan put his face in his hands for a moment and let out a frustrated groan. "You can't say that or promise that to me, Elizabeth, because it has happened before. And as much as I do love you, I have to get past this emotional check in my gut about that. Allie needs it too. Does that even make sense to you? ", he looked at Elizabeth with searching eyes. He got up from his spot on the steps and started pacing.

Elizabeth watched him carefully for a bit, trying to compose her thoughts on what she would say next. "So Nathan, what should we do?" Is this... are we... even a possibility? Is my choice from the past, the decision for today? ", she asked as tears began to trickle down her cheeks.

Nathan stopped pacing long enough to stare at Elizabeth with an agonized look on his face. He ran his fingers through his chestnut locks and let out a long breath. "Elizabeth, I didn't mean to make you cry, but if I'm not honest with you now, I'm not doing either one of us any good. You asked if we were a possibility... Yes, I believe so. But, Allie and I have, I guess you could say, conditions that need to be taken into consideration before we can be completely "official". Are you willing to court with conditions?" , he asked Elizabeth as he stood in front of her.

Elizabeth brushed away her tears and looked at him with a thoughtful expression. She opened her mouth to speak, but still emotional, the tears came flowing out instead, and so she simply nodded her head. Nathan came, sat next to her, and faced her, gently saying, "Do you want to hear the conditions before agreeing?" Her blue eyes held his gaze, and once again, she nodded her head. Nathan smirked and wiped away the tears from each cheek with his thumbs. He held that position briefly, but then quickly placed his hands back onto his knees and cleared his throat.

He looked back at her and responded, "I would like to court you, Elizabeth, and see where this will go. I would like our families to spend time with one another as well, because this isn't just about you and me, it's about us. It's unclear whether this would work for everyone. Additionally, I would want us to counsel with Joseph—you and me and the four of us, or at least the three of us. There are scars and wounds that still need to be dealt with properly, if this is going to work. "

Elizabeth listened intently and nodded. "Nathan, I gladly accept your offer of courtship and conditions." she responded, and gave him a shy smile. She then continued, "I would love to see where we, you and me, and the four of us, can and will take this journey of ours." The two stared at one another for a moment, then Elizabeth looked down and started to lean in slightly. All of a sudden, Nathan pulled back quickly, put his hand up and spoke, "No, I can't. This is another condition I have for us. I saw too much of this over the past two years with you and Lucas. I don't want to have this kind of moment until we are both sure that this is forever. Can you accept that too? "

Elizabeth sat back, in shock, staring at Nathan. She was about to respond when Allie came out, said dinner was ready, and went back inside. Nathan stood up and put his hand out to Elizabeth to help her stand. She stared at his hand for a moment and then placed her hand in his and allowed him to help pull her to her feet. When she was up, their eyes locked for a moment, and they stood there, and then Nathan gave a smirk and said, "We'll talk more later. Let me know when you figure out what you want. " Then, he winked at her, opened the door and gestured for her to go inside.