Author's Note: I was actually wondering if I should put this one up - if it was plausible enough, and if it was...good enough, simply because someone had told me it wasn't that good. Well, I finally decided to put it up, as you can see, and I hope it's good.Enjoy. ;)

Narcissa Malfoy
I never dreamed of having a life like this. Perhaps I knew, subconsciously, what life I would be living when I married my husband, but I didn't really know – or rather, I refused to acknowledge it.

Sometimes I wonder why I married him. It's silly, really. I loved him, once. But now, it's as if he's a stranger. An occasional visitor to the house. Someone who couldn't possibly have been, at once point, that man I married so many years ago.

The war really devastated everyone. Not just the Muggleborn wizards and witches, and not just Dumbledore and not just those who aren't Death Eaters. The war devastated us, too. The Death Eaters and the families of the Death Eaters. It's not often that we think of wars hurting the villains; it's always the heroes that are being hurt, devastated. But I know that's not true.

Lucius comes home everyday – no, not even everyday anymore – and barely says a word to me or our son. It's as if he's lost the ability to feel any sort of emotion. I loved him once, and he loved me back. I really wonder when that warm feeling disappeared. It's as if it never existed.

We used to gather in the sitting room after dinner – Lucius and Draco and me. And I would play the piano for them. Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata, or Chopin's Impromptu. And now, Draco is at school most of the year, and Lucius doesn't seem to want to or have time to listen. I still play, of course, but it's cold and lonely.

On some days, the Minister for Magic – Cornelius Fudge – will come to our house. And stay and have a long talk with Lucius. Probably a clandestine deal or something. And then other times, Aurors will come knocking at the door to search the entire house. And it's then I wonder what Lucius has been doing. I never say anything to him about those searches, and he doesn't seem to want me to. I can only hope it isn't going to ruin Draco's future.

And then one evening, "Narcissa…what do you want Draco to do after he graduates from Hogwarts?"

You see, I had persuaded him to send our dear Draco to Hogwarts, and not to Durmstrang. Durmstrang would harden him, would associate him too much with the Dark Arts at such an early age, and I didn't want that.

"I don't know," I replied. "Draco should be able to do whatever he wants, almost. He's not doing badly in terms of grades."

He looked at me for a while. "Narcissa… The Dark Lord wants to have Draco in his service."

I stared at him in shock and extreme disappointment. "Lucius… Draco can't… Please. You promised me…"

"I know I did, Narcissa," he said quietly. "But I can't defy the Dark Lord. I'd rather we live, than that we all be killed."

I cried, and for once, he comforted me. "I'm sorry, Narcissa," he repeated. But those words did nothing to ease my pain. I had tried so hard to keep Draco away from evil, persuading Lucius to send him to Hogwarts… But it seemed that none of that had helped in the end.

I would lose both my husband and my son – my only two loves – to this blasted war. I hated the war.

I hated the war like nothing else I had ever "hated." This was pure hate. The others, mere dislikes, exaggerated by a teenage girl. But the war – it had devastated my life, and I was determined to hate it until the day I died.

"Narcissa, you must understand…" Lucius often tried to placate me. But what was I supposed to understand? That life was going to be unfair to me and that I was just supposed to deal with it? I felt it unjust.

And so when Draco was assigned that task of…of murdering Dumbledore, I obviously reacted badly. He was only sixteen! Sixteen, destined to be a murderer, employed in the Dark Lord's service! A kind of bitterness – bitterness and despair – took over me. Devoid of all hope, I resolved to go to Severus and beg him for his help. He would know what to do, perhaps.

But Bella found out before I was able to go there. Bella, devoted servant to the Dark Lord. Oh, how I despised that fact. She was my sister, and I loved her, but did she really have to commit herself to the Dark Lord? I didn't see what was so great about this man – this man who killed for no reason at all. This man who was planning to bring the Wizarding World as we know it into destruction and chaos. This man who was planning to kill Dumbledore – the man who had defeated Grindelwald in our darkest times. Oh, I'm sure many would be surprised to know that I am against this war. But I don't tell anyone, of course. There are severe consequences, especially since I'm Lucius' wife.

But anyways, just as I was going out to plead with Severus, wearing a dark cloak, Bella Apparated into the house. I was surprised, of course.

"Bella, what a surprise to have you here!" I remember I exclaimed. I had been rather nervous that Lucius would find out, and Bella coming was not exactly the path to secrecy from Lucius.

"I heard you were going to Severus Snape."

I knew it would be of no use to lie. "I am."

"For what reason, Cissy?"

I sighed. "I need to talk to him."

"About Draco?"

I looked at her in surprise.

"So it is about him, then," she said.

"I'm desperate, Bella. He's my only child! My son!"

"You should be willing to give him up for the Dark Lord, Cissy. It's an honor, my sister."

"Bella… it is so hard to give up your child, to anyone."

Bella sighed in frustration. "Cissy, don't you understand? Anything or anyone can be given up for the Dark Lord's purpose. I would be willing to give my life for him."

I didn't understand. And I don't understand now either. What could be so important about one man that he would be worthy of taking things and people from everyone? Ripping families apart, devastating towns and cities, tearing apart children and their parents, senseless murdering – how could that man do those things and still be respected by some? How was it even possible?

To others, it may have looked like I supported the Dark Lord, his cause, and the war for his glory. To Bella, it may have seemed as if I was committed to supporting him, but was reluctant or hesitant in action only.

But I wish they all knew how much I hated the Dark Lord, his cause, and this war.