Title: Clarity

Author: Inlya

Rating: Warning: New Rating... I rated this story R just to be safe & because a violent and sexual orientated chapter. Not this chapter though...

Summary: When Sara has been shot, certain things become clear for Grissom.

Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters. They belong to CBS.

A big thank you to Fish for beta reading. I really appreciate it.

A hug for Rianne for being my CSI buddy.

And finally, Tielke, thanks so much for your patience.

Chapter 1

Catherine walked through the building of the CSI crime lab. It was about two o'clock and she was on her way to the DNA lab. Greg Sanders, the lab technician had sent her a message that he had news about her case. She stood in front of the window of the lab and looked at the young technician who was bouncing at the heavy rock music that came blaring out of his stereo. She couldn't help but smile, Greg seemed to have fun. She knocked on the door, but Greg didn't notice her. She coughed.

Greg looked up from the centrifuge. 'Cath... what's up?'

Catherine walked towards him. 'I heard you had results for me? You paged me?'

The information came to mind. 'Aaaah... you got to love this.' He walked to the desk and waved the papers. 'The DNA results came up blank, but Greg Sanders will always look further than you think he will. I compared the DNA you gave me with the DNA of the victim, Tara Jones, and guess what? Seven of 13 markers matched.' His whole attitude seemed satisfied.

'So... it is a relative.' Catherine walked to the door and turned around.

'Don't you have something to say to the guy who almost solved the case?'

Catherine rolled her eyes. 'Okay then Greg, you're the best...' She walked away from the lab towards Brass' office.

Catherine's cell phone rang, she picked up. 'Willows.'

'Cath, it's Nick. Do you know where Sara is? She promised to help me with processing the car, and I can't find her.'

'She's working on a case with me. She went back to the crime scene to process some evidence that we might have missed. Have you tried to contact her on her cell phone?'

'Yeah, but she doesn't answer it. Isn't that weird? She always has hers on.'

Catherine felt that something was wrong. It was true; Sara always answered phone calls, even when she was busy with evidence. But she didn't want to make Nick more worried than he already was. 'Maybe she just... didn't hear it. I will check for you, okay?' She hung up.

It still didn't feel right. Catherine dialed Sara's phone, but she didn't answer. Catherine tried again: maybe she got the wrong number. Still she didn't pick up She continued her way to Brass' office, but when she was in front of his door, she realized that he wouldn't be able to do anything to make her feel better. She went to her car, opened it with the remote control on her key ring and stepped inside. She started the vehicle and drove to the crime scene.

When she arrived, she could literally feel that there was something wrong. She couldn't see any signs of Sara's car, the whole scene seemed empty. She parked her car and stepped out. She walked around at the scene: no Sara. She took the flashlight out of her pocket and turned it on. She stood still and turned around. She could see small orange lights in the distance when she turned to the south. Maybe a car? She wasn't sure.

'Sara!' She called. She didn't get response. She started to run to the lights, calling out her name. 'Sara! Where are you?' Come on, this isn't funny anymore, she told herself. Now, she was so close that she could see the license plate. She stopped immediately. 'O god...' Her hand covered her mouth. This was bad, very bad. Sara's car, without Sara around was a bad sign. After a moment she realized that Sara might be in the car. She ran to the driver's side. What she discovered was even worse than what she had in mind.

Sara was lying with her forehead on the steering wheel. She couldn't see what happened, but she guessed it was something bad. Her face looked deathly pale in the beam of the flashlight. Was she still alive? She tried to open the car, but it was locked. 'Dammit!' Why should things like this happen right now? She took a step back. She closed her eyes for a moment. 'Please, stay calm.' She told herself out loud. She opened her eyes again. Catherine tried to asses Sara's condition through the window. She saw Sara's chest rise and fall, but quickly and very weak. 'Thank god...' Tears of relief threatened to fall, but she pushed her feelings away. She had to help Sara right now, if she didn't she could die. She took her cell phone out and dialed 911.

'911, what's your emergency?'

For a moment Catherine didn't know what to say. 'I ehm... my friend, Sara... She's badly hurt.'

'Ma'am, please stay calm. Where are you?'

Thoughts passed through her mind. She tried to remember what the name of the street was. 'I am near Meadows Lane 1538. She's in a black SUV... please come quickly...'

'An ambulance is on the way.'

The connection broke up and Catherine went back to the car. She stepped back, drew her gun and used it to break open the back window of the car. The window shattered into little pieces and Catherine was able to open the door. She stepped inside and moved to the passenger side. She looked at Sara and saw that her whole shirt was covered with blood. She still couldn't see the source. Catherine's hand moved carefully to Sara's neck. She laid two fingers on her neck and checked Sara's pulse. Her heartbeat was really fast, Catherine's guessed about 130 beats per minute. She touched Sara's face. 'Sara? Sara... wake up.'

A small cough escaped from Sara's mouth. She opened her eyes and tried to lift her head from the steering wheel. Catherine helped her sit back in the seat. Now she could see that there was a small gunshot wound in her chest, very close to the place where her heart was supposed to be. Catherine saw that Sara was looking at her; she could see the fright in her eyes.

'... happened?... my breast... hurt...'

Catherine didn't know what to say to comfort her. 'I don't know what happened... listen; the paramedics will be here soon. You need to be strong, honey.'

Sara's eyes became hazy, her eyelids fluttered closed.

'Sara! You need to be strong. Do you hear me?' Sara nodded, her eyes still closed. She could see that Sara was suffering. In the distance, she could hear the ambulance sirens. She unlocked the doors, stepped out and ran to the ambulance. It stopped and two paramedics ran towards her, one with an emergency kit in his hand. A female with long black hair entered the car. Before Catherine realized what was happening, Sara was lying on a stretcher.

'Ma' am?'

Catherine looked up into the green eyes of the EMT.

'Are you riding with us?'

Catherine nodded and ran to the ambulance.

When she stepped in, the doors of the ambulance were slammed. The ambulance sped away. The sirens were easy to hear. Catherine stared at the stretcher. Sara was lying there with lots of IV's in her arm. Her eyes were closed, but not like they were before. She seemed to sleep, her face held some kind of peace. Catherine didn't know what to do. She wanted to cry, but the moment wasn't right for it. Did she want to know how Sara was doing? She tried to focus on the things that were said by the paramedics.

'Just give her two doses of propoxyphene.'

'BP 90 over 75! Pulse 120! Stats are dropping!'

'Then give her more oxygen!'

Catherine did not understand everything that was said, but she knew it was quite bad.

'Miss...'

'Willows, Catherine Willows.'

'Can you answer some of our questions about her?' The woman with the black hair sat next to her with a pen and paper.

'Yes, of course.'

'What's her name?'

Catherine thought it was better to tell the doctor every detail she knew about Sara's medical record, the faster this was finished, the better it was for her. 'She's Sara Sidle, an employee of the Las Vegas Crime Lab. She's 33 years old, about 5 foot 8, about 120 lbs.'

The EMT smiled at her. 'Thanks for the details. I am Sandy. Is she allergic to any of medication or to something else that we should be aware of?'

Catherine tried to think of all the conversations she has had with Sara. 'Not that I know... How... how is she doing? Is she going to... make it?'

The EMT gave her a warm smile. 'She's very weak; she has lost a lot of blood. They are going to operate on her, they'll have to remove the bullet from her chest. I can't say if she is going to make it or not.' The EMT took her radiophone and typed a number. 'Sorry, have to make a call,' she told Catherine. 'Hey, it's me. I need six bags of O neg. Of course I need it now. In 5 minutes. Okay. Woman with gunshot wound to the chest. Thanks.' She hung up.

The ambulance arrived at the hospital before Catherine realized it. The paramedics ran with the stretcher right to the Operation Room. Catherine followed them, until she came to two huge swinging doors. A nurse made it clear that she couldn't go into that room. 'You can sit there.' She pointed to a couch on the side of the big hall, but Catherine didn't want to sit down. No-one knew about what happened, she had to call them. She walked to the desk.

A young woman was sitting there. 'How can I help you?'

'I need to make a call...' The nurse put the phone on the desk so that Catherine could use it.

'Thank you very much.' She typed in the Grissom's cell phone number.

'Grissom.'

She inhaled, pausing to prepare herself for the bad news she had to relay. 'Grissom... Something happened, you need to come over to Desert Palm...' Memories came rushing back, memories of Sara's shirt covered with blood, memories of Sara's eyes full of fear, memories of the lifeless body lying on the stretcher. She almost started to cry, but somehow she managed to hide her tears.

'Cath...? What happened? Who...?'

Catherine couldn't find the words to tell him the bad news, but she knew she had to. 'I ehm... Sara's been shot... she's in surgery now.' The other side of the line remained silent. She could almost feel his fear. 'Gil?' She whispered, hoping he would respond. The heartbreaking silence was tearing her apart. If he would cry, she had the opportunity to comfort him, if he would scream, she could calm him down, but she didn't know how to break the silence.

'Cath... I'll... I'll be right there.' He hung up. She put the phone down on the desk and walked to the couch. She sat down and closed her eyes for a moment, wishing that this was only a really bad dream.

Moments passed by, and Catherine remained on the couch. She knew she couldn't do anything, and that idea made her mad, but she knew that screaming wouldn't make a difference. A familiar voice brought her back to reality. She looked up, and saw Grissom standing in front of her. She got up and looked into his confused face. His silence said anything to her, so she stepped towards him and gave him a hug.

After a long time she let him go.

'Cath? What happened?'

'I... she didn't answer her cell phone. I felt that there was something wrong and went to the scene. There was blood all over her shirt, she was shot in her chest. She...' A wry smile appeared on her face. 'You should say that I knew what to do, but I... freaked out. I'm so sorry...'

He sat down on the couch. Catherine took place beside him.

He looked at her. 'Is she going to...' He couldn't finish his sentence: the thought of a life without Sara made him numb. If she would die, he would never forgive himself. He felt that he could have saved her, if he hadn't... if he had told her... Stop thinking about this, she's going to live, he told himself, but why did these words make so little sense?

'I really don't know, but you have to remember: She's a tough one.' She took his hand and squeezed. 'Hey... it's going to be okay.' He looked at her, and she gave him a smile. She didn't know whether she told him because she believed it, or because she wanted to believe it.