Disclaimer: I don't own Gravitation etc. This story is based on characters by Maki Murakami.

Authors note: this chapter contains a very mild description of sexual activity. if you are not keen on boy/boy action don't read it. Mind you if you're not keen on that sort of thing you probably wouldn't be a Gravitation fan in the first place.

Tohma was pinned against the wall of the shower.

"Ryuichi."

Tohma pulled him closer

"Ryu..."

"It's alright Little Cat. I know already." Ryuichi laughed. "We're going to have to get out of this shower before one of us slips and breaks a neck."

They lay together in the afterglow, Tohma's head resting on Ryuichi's chest. Ryuichi's arm wrapped around his shoulders.

Tohma ran his hand down Ryu's chest idly.

"We should do this more often"

"Certainly, no no da."

"We should do this all the time."

Ryuichi laughed, one of his grown up laughs, rather than the childish giggle which often infuriated Tohma.

"Naughty Little Cat" he said. He pulled Tohma closer and kissed him on the top of his head. "We couldn't do this all the time, it would be too sore."

Tohma kissed him on the breast bone and half sat up.

"Not just sex, stupid."

He ran his fingers through the chest hair Ryuichi hadn't bothered to shave. Ran his hand over the muscle of his stomach, moving his fingers down to the more sensitive area just below his navel.

Ryuichi leant back against the pillows and put his hands behind his head. He looked at Tohma curiously.

"You're very eager today. Don't you think its a little too soon?"

Tohma moved his hands down further, kneading and probing.

"How much are you paying for this place?"

"Too much, little cat. And you've definitely hit a sensitive spot by the way."

"Mmm." Tohma kissed the sensitive spot.

Moved down to kiss another sensitive spot. Ryuichi was beginning to harden, it wasn't too soon after all.

"You've still got the other house. The one in the country. That must be costing you a fortune."

"That's all paid for. I bought it outright. Please don't stop what you're doing. It's very odd, but it's working"

Tohma continued as instructed.

"You've still got the upkeep. You could move in with me, and we could split costs."

Ryuichi sounded amused.

"And what about Mika-san?"

"She's left."

Ryuichi removed Tohma's hand and sat up.

Tohma snuggled into him, and ran his hand across his chest again.

"Ryu?"

"No." Ryuichi moved and swung his legs over the edge of the bed.

He fiddled with something on the bedside table, moved the condom packet and the lube, turned the clock face up, found his gum. It seemed to take him forever to get into the packet.

Tohma knew a delaying tactic when he saw one.

"Ryu?"

Ryuichi finally got into the box. He shook out a piece, chucked the box to Tohma and stood up.

"I thought you'd be pleased. You've never liked her."

Ryuichi reached for his dressing gown and put it on.

"I loathe her," he said simply, "but she's good for you."

He fumbled with the cord.

"Why'd she leave?"

"She's got a boyfriend."

"That's hardly new."

"She's moved in with this one."

Ryuichi finally tied the cord. He moved to the stereo and started thumbing through the CDs.

More delaying tactics.

"Ryuichi?"

Ryuichi turned to face him. He was holding a brightly coloured CD case.

"I'm moving to America," he said, "I've got a three album contract and a new manager."

"What? When?"

"End of next week, the one after. The rent on this place runs out at the end of the month."

"When were you going to tell me?"

"Today."

"You're still under contract to NG."

"Not after the end of the month."

That was true, Tohma had forgotten, he'd seen the memo, he was going to arrange the meeting. He'd just assumed Ryuichi would want to carry on. They were friends, it was a friendly agreement.

"It hasn't really worked out, being a solo act here in Japan. People want Nittle Grasper, not Ryuichi."

"You didn't do anything for over a year, it's been difficult relaunching you."

"Yeah well." Ryuichi shrugged. "We all want to break the states, this is as good a time for me as any. I'm only half Japanese you know, that's not good here, but it's good over there."

"Ryu, with the timings I can do you for breach of contract."

"Yeah, you won't. I'm not making you enough money for it to be worth the bad publicity."

This was quite true.

"Money and publicity always count with you Little Cat, you know that. I'm looking forward to it. I'm going to live in Los Angeles, near my sister. It's good seeing her again, no no da"

"If you weren't going to America, would you have moved in with me?"

Ryuichi had the decency to at least look as if he was giving it some thought.

"No," he said finally, "I like living on my own."

"Ryuichi?"

"What?"

"Don't you sometimes wish we'd done things differently?"

Ryuichi looked startled. "Done what differently?"

"This." Tohma waved his hand. "Don't you sometimes wonder what it would have been like if we had done this properly? Had a proper relationship, been faithful, Chocolates on White Day, Christmas Eve in a love motel, anniversaries, holidays, forward planning."

Kumagoro was lying face down on the dresser. Ryuichi picked the stuffed toy up and stared at it. He was silent for a long long time.

"You know when you feel for some one, and when you hurt they hurt," he said finally. " When they're happy you're happy. You would do anything in the world for that person, because if you don't you break. You know that feeling, no no da?"

Tohma thought about it.

"Yes..." he said uncertaintly.

"Well I don't feel like that about you. I don't want to feel like that about anyone. I'm fond of you, I like you, we're good friends. I don't want to have to care about you."

Tohma got off the bed, found his clothes and went home.

Neither of them said a word. It was the last time they spoke to each other for over a year.