Disclaimer: Gravitation belongs to Maki Murakami not me, I'm just playing about in her sandbox.

It was raining. It was still raining.

"Why is it raining indoors?" Tohma asked.

He could still taste salt.

"Ryuichi?"

Ryuichi was still trying to tell him something.

Ryuichi slapped him across the face.

The first time Mika left, she came back. She came back in the Spring. It started with phone calls, often at odd hours.

"Hi yah!"

"Hello Mika."

"Haven't spoken to you for ages, thought I'd see how you were doing."

"I'm fine."

"Good. We should talk more, just 'cos I've moved out doesn't mean we should stop being friends."

"No."

"How's work?"

"Busy. I'm putting together a new act."

"Any good?"

"Teenage girls will love them."

"Go those teenage girls! How's Ryuichi-san liking America?"

"I don't know. I haven't spoken to him since the week before he left."

"Oh. Well he half grew up there, didn't he? He'll be fine."

"How's Tanaka-san?"

"Busy! He's in the middle of a new book. He's so boring about it. He works nine to five hours." Mika sounded aggrieved, "he gets up at eight, has breakfast and locks himself in his study for the next eight hours. How can you be a writer and work nine to five hours? Eiri doesn't."

"Your brother works very anti-social hours, Mika."

"Yes, but he's fun about it."

"Isn't Tanaka-san fun?"

"No. Oh, I mean yes. Oh, I don't know. It's just that if he works nine to five hours he might as well leave the house to do it. He's around all the time."

Tohma chuckled at the somewhat muddled sentiment.

A door slammed in the background on Mika's end of the phone.

"Shit. Look I've got to go. Call me! We should talk more"

"Call me... We should talk more."

"To-chan I can't hear you. What are you trying to say? You're not making sense. To-chan, can you hear me? Please wake up."

Tohma woke abruptly from a complicated and disquieting dream with the vague feeling that something was wrong. He stared at the ceiling, and listened to the quiet snores emitting from the duvet-stealing cocoon next to him. The green light on the bedside clock flashed six thirty. The phone rang again. Tohma reached for the handset.

"Hello," he said groggily.

"I didn't wake you up did I?" Mika sounded obscenely peppy and completely wired

"It's a little early."

The cocoon unwound to reveal a mop of badly dyed purple hair and a pair of eyes which even in the dim dawn light seemed blood shot.

"Wazzit? No class today," the lad said incoherently.

Tohma motioned him to be quiet.

"What was that?"

"Nothing."

"I heard a voice. Tohma, did I call you at a bad time?"

Tohma was still collecting his thoughts. Last night (or more properly, this morning), was beginning to come back to him... There had been a party... the wrap party for The Anger tour... it had been a dreary affair, but Tohma had gone to show willing. The kid was a trainee technician. A trainee technician? Shit... How old was he?

"I should call you back," Mika sounded embarrassed.

"No."

He had only meant to pop in for an hour, do the boss thing, congratulate everyone heartily and leave. He'd been chatting to some of the members of the road crew, and when he'd moved away from them the kid had somehow attached himself to him, and they'd got chatting. He'd reminded him strongly of Ryuichi, and it wasn't just his looks – it was his enthusiasm, and his attitude towards life in general. The kid had got him talking, really talking, it was almost as if they had known each other for years. When Tohma had decided it was time to leave, he'd met the kid outside at the taxi rank. The kid didn't have much money so Tohma had suggested he share his taxi, and then they had both ended up going back to Tohma's house... And then Tohma had realised that he hadn't got a clue what to do next. He'd never actually picked anybody up before... They'd ended up polishing off a bottle of whiskey that Mika had left and talking about life. Tohma had talked about Mika, and the kid had talked about his ex-boyfriend, and they'd both ended up maudlin and feeling very sorry for themselves. Tohma had gone upstairs to change the sheets in the spare room, the kid had followed him, curled up in his bed and passed out. It was all relatively innocent in the end, but Mika would never have believed that.

"I mean if there is someone with you, it would be fine. I've moved out, remember. I've got a boyfriend."

"Mika, what's up?"

"Oh, it's just..." Mika hesitated. A door slammed in the background. "Fuck!" There was a cluttering sound as Mika put her hand over the receiver. Tohma could still catch bits of her conversation with the person in the background. "Oh nothing important sweetheart, just an old friend of mine... A girlfriend... She lives in America... Don't be silly... No it's on her bill."

Tohma swung his legs against the side of the bed, and wondered if he should put the phone down.

The kid had obviously given up on sleep, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He yawned.

"So can I talk now?" He sounded irritated.

Tohma shook his head.

"Jesus H. Christ on a fucking pogo stick! You're a real wierdo, you know that," the kid said, making no effort to curb his voice. "Where's the pisser?"

Tohma pointed to the screen which concealed the ensuite.

"Tohma?" Mika was back on the phone.

"What's happened?" Tohma said wearily.

"Nothing. It's just..." The door slammed in the background again. Mika switched to a chirpy girl talk voice. "No really! She didn't, did she?"

"No she didn't," Tohma said firmly. "Why don't you call me back later, when it's a good time to talk?"

"Darling!" Mika said exuberantly, "if your boyfriend is that jealous, it's never a good time to talk... Well you might think so... but if he's around all the time, and he listens to all your calls..."

The door slammed in the background again.

"His wife had an affair you know," Mika said in a more normal voice, "that's why he ditched her, now he's completely paranoid. He really is."

"I see."

"Tohma have you heard of a band called Sonic Noise?"

"Industrial Metal, nasty. Look..."

"A friend of mine really likes them. He's their biggest fan. He's got the CDs, the special edition DVD, he's even got the collectible sticker book."

Tohma suddenly felt extremely sorry for Tanaka-san.

"It's really not the sort of music I like, Mika. Listen..."

"They're playing the Round House next Thursday and they're completely sold out. I know this is a bit cheeky." She did at least have the grace to sound a little guilty, "I don't suppose you'd be able to get me a couple of tickets?"

The kid came back from the bathroom, he was sipping from a tooth glass full of water. He ran his fingers through his hair.

"Look this isn't a good time after all," Tohma told Mika, "Ring my secretary in the morning."

He put the phone down.

"So can I talk now?" The kid asked. He took his T-shirt off and climbed back into the bed.

"It was just a business call," Tohma said.

"Yeah right." The kid was frankly disbelieving, "I'm awake now. Are we going to fuck or what?"

"Tohma have you taken something? Tohma listen to me, what have you taken?"

Late one night. Tohma had just got back. He was lying on the sofa almost on a comedown; late nights and up and coming bands almost gave him the sort of buzz he used to have when he'd just come off stage. It was a vicarious buzz, not the same thing as it had been when he had stood there himself, and back then there had been late night parties to help you back to earth. He closed his eyes and saw the yellow blaze across his eyes. Five years ago and even in the audience he could see that clear distinction – the light that blinds and a sea of darkness that is made up of everyone and anyone. Tonight the darkness had been hostile; undeservedly so, the band was unexceptional, they had said nothing offensive, sung nothing that could annoy and yet the audience had hated them. It happened that way sometimes, you could never put a finger on it, but sometimes you got a band that had everything going for them on the surface; a good sound, a perfectly presentable front man, and for some reason the audience just didn't take them into their hearts, they weren't even prepared to listen. It was a shame but it was something you couldn't really do anything about. And then despite the ill-will from the punters, the band had turned them around, taken a crowd which really didn't like them and made them love them. The band had them eating out of their hands by the end of the set. It was a stunning piece of showmanship. He reached for his PDA.
The phone rang.

"Tohma love, I hope I didn't wake you."

"Mika?"

"sorry to ring so late."

"that's alright."

"I called before, earlier. You weren't in." She sounded like she'd been crying.

"I've just got back."

"Are you OK, you sound a little out of it?"

"I'm fine. How are you?"

"I'm fine. Everything's just hunky dory in Mika-land."

"How's Tanaka-san?"

"He's a bastard."

"Aren't they always?"

"Maybe." Mika laughed wryly, "Maybe its me, maybe I make them bastards. Maybe they're all wonderful to start with and I change them. It's me that makes them monsters. Ever think about that Tohma?"

"Come on pet, don't be silly."

"It's a valid point, they can't all be wankers. There can't be that many bastards out there, it's me Tohma, it's got to be. I do something to them. They start off perfectly normal members of the human race and they finish off bastards. It is me, they can't all be like that."

"There's nothing wrong with you, Mika. You know that."

"..."

"You never turned me into a bastard... Or was I?"

"That was different."

"It was?"

"Oh I don't know. I miss you. I know it sounds crazy, but I miss you."

"I miss you too."

"You do?"

"Yes."

"You could say that again to help my ego."

"You're interesting, and you're fun and I miss you."

"I miss you too, Tohma."

"Come on To-chan you can't lie down here. You can't go to sleep. Can you stand up. Tohma please try and move."

"Uesigichi-san for you."

"Put her through."

"Hello Mika, how are you doing?"

"Not so good Tohma."

"I'm sorry to hear that."

"Sorry to ring you at work."

"I'm not that busy."

"I'm sure you are, you've always had good manners. Tohma?"

"What?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"What's wrong?"

"Look, can I stay with you for a few days?"

"Sure."

"It won't be more than a few days, I promise. I just need somewhere to stay."

"Most of your stuff is still in the house."

"Yes, I know." Mika sounded sheepish, "I never did get round to picking it up. I'm so disorganised, I really am. I did mean to pick it up. I'm sorry. I'll take it all with me this time."

"That's not what I meant. I meant that if I was able to put up with your stuff just lying round the house for the last six months, I could probably put up with having you lying around the house as well."

"Charming!"

"You're easy on the eyes, Mika."

"Goodness me, was that a compliment?"

"I could be more complimentary."

"You're being mildly pervy before noon. You're obviously coming down with something."

Tohma laughed. "Just come back home Mika. You don't need to find somewhere else to live."

"Tohma, I don't want to impose on you. Really I don't. It won't be for long, just till I find a new place."

"Why are you moving out anyway?"

"Two's claustrophobic, and three's a crowd," Mika said wryly. "He's got back with his ex-wife. He always had a thing about her. I don't care. He was a wanker anyway, and she's a bitch. They deserve each other, they really do."

"You've still got the keys."

"Yes. What sort of time will you be coming back this evening? Do you want me to pick up anything for dinner?"

She came back, and she stayed for three years. When she left him again it had all been Tohma's fault, it turned out he was a bastard after all.

Ryuichi was on his phone. He was talking in English.

"K-san.. I'm sorry to ring you so late. There's a problem. You were the first person I could think of... No K-san. No prostitutes this time... No I haven't been arrested... No don't be silly... For fucks sake I don't have time for this"

"Sorry K-san that was rude... No I'm not in trouble... Yes. I know its four in the morning... Yes I know you're not my manager any more... Alright the second person I could think of... He is the problem K-san... Please I don't want to talk about this over the phone... Room 414 the Plaza."