The last chapter is up! Again, for more info, look back at the first chapter ;) Thanks to all my reviewers! XD You're all so great! I hope this ending is okay, I don't think it's rich enough, but I'm mildly satisfied lol P
Glossary:
Sayonara "Goodbye (as a means of never seeing the person again)"
Wakata "I know"
Souna "That can't be"
Ashiteru "I love you"
The familiar passageway through the front door melted into his mind as memories of his days at the dojo came back. It had only been a day, but knowing the fact that he would be leaving pierced his remembrance as it gave him a tingling feeling. This place where he had lived as his home for half a year, almost to the end of summer, never again would he come back. Never again.
Entering upon a room, the first thing in sight was just black. The color tended to cover miles to come during the night, Kenshin figured, but it was not so much as hideous. Actually, at this time, it was probably a thankful way of nature for he felt safer hidden in the darkness, where Kaoru wouldn't have to see him.
On the ground lay the angel, her long silky black hair sprawled across the wooden floor, her eyelashes closed, unmoving, but alive and breathing. Her lips were slightly open, enough for thin portions of air to flow in and out. A sleeping bag tucked her in nicely, more so that one arm was bended beside her head and the other straight down next to her legs.
Such a pretty sight, Kenshin thought, had never been cherished for months. Tomorrow, it would all just vanish, all memories of her.
He slowly walked toward the girl, kneeling down next to her. "Kaoru-dono," he whispered.
Naturally of course, she was fast asleep.
A sad smile swept quickly on and off of his face. His eyes shifted from her face down to her exposed shoulder, where he suddenly noticed the cut too close to her neck. With grief, he gently traced his fingers down the wound that he knew, hurt so much. He had watched her all day and although Sanosuke may not have noticed it, he noticed the small expressions she had, her eyes squinting and her excuses to rest more often than usual. It wasn't the fact that Kaoru was evidently suffering from the injury, but that the cause of it all was him.
"Kaoru-dono, don't be so hard on yourself. Truthfully, all of this is my fault, I just failed to see it coming," he said, unconsciously soothing the sleeping maiden.
He closed his eyes. "I've been with you for almost half a year," he wasn't sure where to start, but wherever it was, he had to say something, even if she couldn't be listening. "It had been fun, really. I enjoyed all the time we had together and I'm glad that I was able to meet you.
"Kaoru-dono, you've been a true friend. You've been…so kind to me, Kaoru-dono," he continued. "I was deeply touched that you still accepted me for who I am despite my past. And it may seem that you didn't mind that I stayed with you like a family. It was honorable, Kaoru-dono. It was very honorable of you.
"Demo, I'm leaving tomorrow, for good, just so you might like to know. I might not come back, or even if I do, it won't be for another couple of years. I can stay here instead, if you want, but…"
He didn't know how to finish that line. Really, what other possible solution is there than for him to leave? What excuses could Kaoru-dono be making? Lowering his head to the floor, he gradually trailed off; there was no reason to keep going on.
"I'm not so sure how to tell you this." He resumed. "You may not believe it as the way I may say it, that is most likely so, but I want you to hear me out before I leave. You've been a brave girl, you lived with a stranger without any hesitation, and consent is far too off for such a courageous person like you. I am sure that in the future, you will be a model, a symbolism, for all those you teach."
He paused, observing her silently in her dreams. "However, you can't accompany me. I'm the Hitokiri Battousai.
"It's just like how you said it. No matter what I may act like, no matter what I may want to be, I am a manslayer deep down inside, the kind of man that will not change. Perhaps, I didn't want to face that fact, but perhaps, I may also be grateful that you showed me the true me, the true person I really am, and I can't change that fact.
"I, the legendary Battousai, cannot live with a lady who has never shed a man's blood before. I cannot stay with you in harmony; it is fate that we cross bonds, but it isn't so that the bond is tied."
He sighed.
"I am a wanderer. If I am unwanted here, I will wander again."
He stopped. "I truly wish I can stay with you, but things…have changed. I will always envy that man, that man who you will live on with love that will bloom, he will be the most fortunate.
"Gomen, Kaoru-dono," he gulped, resisting the urge to cry, "I never meant to hurt you."
He let go of his sheathed sword, which he finally realized he had been squeezing the whole time. In front of him, Kaoru moaned in her sleep, sending shivers up his spine. Lowering his head toward her face, he noted the smell of flowers from her, her cooking may be pretty awful (but improving), but she had a natural talent for nature.
Her cheeks were white, even under the darkest of the moonlit room, which a tinge of red, smooth and clean, just like pedals. Gently, he touched her face, fingering her neck and ears playfully.
"Let me tell you something, Kaoru-dono," he leaned closer to her, only the moist of his breath separated the two. He breathed onto the pale skin that he had admired for so long, and attempted to lick the eyelids of her tender face. "You're beautiful."
With that, he stood up. My job's done here, he thought. It's time to go.
As he headed out the door, he fought the urge to turn around. A part of him was yearning to know if Kaoru woke up, if she would accept him again and as she always had done before, ordered him to stay. But the other part of him was afraid, afraid that she wouldn't care, afraid that she would be better off with him gone.
"Sayonara, Kaoru-dono."
Without even stopping to look back, he opened and closed the door behind him, the same old night still in the air, the darkness that engulfed the world now surrounding his aura.
He stepped down from the porch, each with a solemn act of remorse. Now, it would only be a few paces away before he would leave the residence forever and never come back ever again.
If this is fate, he thought, then this is how it should be.
That's when suddenly, the door behind him opened.
Shocked, he slowly cocked his head to the side.
Kaoru!
There she stood. Her pajamas neatly dressed, though her hair in a fritz, she was calm, her face dimmed in the shadow of the moon, but her eyes, he would clearly see, were sadly narrowed, not the happiest sight he had seen her in. But there was neither happiness nor anger he felt within her. That, at the least, was all he could expect.
Speechless for a moment, he turned fully around, his feet firmly steadied on the ground. "Kaoru-dono." It was said as a means of recognition.
To which she answered, "Mm."
He grinned mildly. "Saa, so you were awake?"
"Hai."
"Ah, souka," he mumbled.
The silence that followed brought Kaoru to her nerves as she walked along the path and neared Kenshin. Looking closer, he saw the stern look she possessed, one of seriousness and the kind of tough attribute he had always admired her for.
She pressed on. "You said…you're leaving?"
"Yes, that I am," was the response. "The government is in need of me again. I am going to the nearby town, which I must arrive at noon tomorrow."
She frowned. "I heard about this plan…last week."
He sighed. "Yes, that's true. I was told of this a couple of days ago as well."
"Then why didn't you tell me immediately?"
He stopped, not too sure whether to reply to this or not. But looking into her uneasy eyes, he easily gave in. "I didn't know if I should worry you or not."
"Worry me?" she stepped closer and stared promptly into his eyes. "Who is the one worrying here? Why do you always have to be so selfish?"
Her sudden scream caused Kenshin to backtrack a little before comprehending her widened eyes. "K-Kaoru-"
"Don't call me that!" she yelled. "You have no right to call me that name anymore if you're going to kill someone else!"
He frowned, confusion mingling in his thoughts. "Nani…"
"I heard about it, from the Commander, he was speaking about this," she explained. "They're planning to destroy a clan that had been rebelling the Meiji for years already. There's ten thousands of members in it, you couldn't be planning to prevent a fight. You'll be ordered to kill."
He looked away, away from the eyes that scolded his childish misbehavior. "Wakata…"
"Nani? Kenshin, you knew this already?"
"Hai," he quickly replied, tinted with a grieving tone. "They told me about it already. The leader of the clan had killed a total of 84 people with his sword, and that's only by record. He could have killed as many as 200, but the military couldn't let him go easily. I was asked to capture him and bring him on a trial for death sentence."
He paused. "Demo, based upon his reputation, I would most likely have to kill him right on the spot."
"IYA!" Her scream echoed the nightly atmosphere. A bit taken aback, Kenshin speculated her facial expression, sensing the fear in her eyes.
"You will not go!" she cried. "You will not kill! You swore an oath on this, remember!"
Quietly, he began to slightly shake his head. "Kaoru-dono…"
"Kenshin, you wouldn't kill again, no matter what, no matter what the circumstance, you will not kill a man ever again! You promised!" Waterfalls of tears threatened to spill out, Kenshin could see how she was trying to keep them from falling.
He smiled sadly. "Gomen ne, Kaoru-dono, for making you cry. I had sworn a promise that can never be true for me."
Her eyes widened in shock.
"I don't mean to lie to you, but if I knew then that such a tactic wouldn't work, I would never have said it. I am truly sorry, that I am," he said.
"Iya, you're not sorry. If you are, you wouldn't be doing this!" she grabbed him by his shoulders and began shaking him, as if trying to wake him up from a world unknown. "Kenshin! You kill a person, you're the legendary manslayer again, but that's not who you are anymore! You're the Hitokiri Battousai no more."
"Kaoru-dono," his jaws lowered, his eyebrows softened to sadness and bitter realization. "Gomen. I do not have the courage to rid of that man I used to be, that I don't."
She gasped. "Souna…"
He touched her hands. "I am still the Battousai, deep inside of me. I can't run away from it."
She shook her head violently. "Iya! You're not-"
Cutting her off, "If I hadn't been the Hitokiri Battousai, then I would never have harmed you," he whispered softly, delicately caressing the wounded area of her shoulder. He could feel the bandage that she had tried to put on by herself, the trace of the sword blade that he marked with ownership.
She stared at him, breathless, the world vanishing piece-by-piece right in front of her weary eyes. It was as if, suddenly, the man she had known for all those months had become a complete stranger.
"Unless you believe in him, he will die."
Did he really think she was a fool? She could see so right now, right there, that he was dying already. He was dying yesterday night when he slashed her shoulder and breathed inside of her. He was dying since that night, until now. And perhaps, he was starting to die ever since she met him.
She was really an idiot, a complete idiot. How could she not see? How could she not have known this? Even though he refuses to tell her of some things of his past, she could very well understand.
Yet…she was blind. He was dying and she didn't even give it a thought.
Is it too late now?
"Kenshin…" she whispered, her eyes still locked at the man in front of her. They stood so close, yet his presence was sensed so far off.
He will die, Kenshin will die because he is already only a step away. Once he kills a man, once he does, Kenshin is gone; the Hitokiri Battousai will only relive its infamous history.
This she knows.
She must save him, that she must.
Hence, without hesitation, "Iya, Kenshin, gomen." Her eyes flared in the reflection upon Kenshin's.
He blinked. The girl is losing her mind, he thought. He eyed her with a deep sigh. "You silly, I said before, don't be too hard on yourself. Who's the one to be sorry here?"
But she shook her head. "I should be the one," her voice softened, lowered into the breeze of the still air. "I didn't mean it really, to say that you are still that manslayer."
He stiffened.
"Shikashi," she continued, "you're no Battousai to me. You never were." Suddenly, she pressed forward and binded her arms around the frozen man in front of her, her head resting between his shoulder and neck, her voice echoing in his crimson red hair.
There was still in shock before he realized that she was hugging him. He didn't know how to react.
"Kenshin, I still believe in you."
There were no more words needed, nothing else. He could feel the heat boiling up inside of him. "Kaoru-dono…omae," he trailed off.
She smiled. "Don't go, Kenshin. Don't leave me."
Everything…just went wild.
Confusion in the mist clouded his mind. Reality began to distort and the sense of time becoming increasingly difficult to follow. It felt as if he just missed out half of the life he had lived in.
He wasn't sure if he should be happy. Yet, shouldn't he be? She was saying these words, the words he thought he'd never hear, she had forgiven him, had taken him into her arms, her care, and mended his pain.
But he didn't deserve it, not now, not ever.
"How can you…how can you still say that? After what I did to you, how can you still say that? Kaoru-dono, you baka, you baka…" he choked on his words, locking her with his arms even tighter and fighting the tears from his swelled eyes.
She closed her eyes, letting the man whose heart was already torn apart cascade his tears upon her wound. This is what he needed, she thought. Love.
That was what killed the Kenshin she had knew before. That was what brought this man down to his knees and tears into his eyes.
Love. The obsession was too great, his feelings were too heavy, and his heart was too big. He gave everything away for this one thing he seek; his name, his wealth, his power, all gone. And just for the sake of…a little love.
He had given her everything. But how much had she given him? Not enough.
And until she realized it, he was broken.
So right now, she needed to repair him. "I said…" she started.
He let go, his face bowed down toward the ground, his hands wretched in restless motion upon her arms. Slowly, but comprehensibly, "Wakata. Kaoru-dono, if you shall say so, then I too, will believe in your words, that I do."
And then he smiled, white reflection chaste on his lips, the moonlight flashing upon his glittering eyes, shimmering with sparkles under the dark night.
It was so remarkable, the most beautiful smile she had ever seen.
"Ashiteru."
He was alive again. The victor had claimed his prize.
Him. Not the Hitokiri Battousai.
And not the rurouni either.
This time, he chose to be Himura Kenshin.
notes: yes, this is don now. Remember that this was supposed to be oneshot, I just split it up, so don't expect much lol P The ending is a bit quick, ya di da, I'll try to write more fanfics of this anime in the future. Anyways, ja XD