Wow, a long chapter and pretty quick update- aren't you proud of me? Thankyous to all my lovely lovable reviewers. I love you all so so much. Really, I really do!

Disclaimer: I don't even own a mars bar at this moment in time. So honestly, do you think I own this? No, I didn't think so.

The previous summer…

'Lily?'

James walked into the visitor's room, and saw the last person he expected to. Lily's petite frame was curled up in one of those hard, unwelcoming chairs, her eyes fixed unblinkingly on a bare patch of wall. Hearing her name, she looked round at James. Her eyes held the slightly bloodshot tinge of someone who had recently stopped crying.

'Lily, what happened?'

'I could ask you the same question,' replied Lily, her voice small and weak. She turned her head away from him to stare at the wall again, a haunted look on her pale face.

'I…' James started. 'My father had an accident. He's up in the wards now.' He wasn't sure why he didn't tell her the truth. He just knew that he didn't want anyone to know, not yet at least.

Despite the emotional upheaval Lily was in the middle of, she managed to find a strange kind of sympathy for James. She knew something was wrong, very wrong. An 'accident'? There was something he wasn't letting on to…

'I'm sorry,' she whispered.

He moved to the seat next to her. 'Can I sit here?'

'Of course.' She looked at him intently as he all but collapsed into the adjacent chair. His face was pale, pale and very drained. His eyes were brooding and weary. Something was very different about him, and Lily couldn't place it.

'I never much liked this room,' James mused, looking around. 'It's too…'

'Beige,' said Lily.

'Exactly.' James even managed a small smile- a mammoth achievement considering. 'So what did happen?' he asked gently.

Lily sighed heavily and recounted her tale. 'Well, my parents had said that they weren't able to pick me up this afternoon- they had a dinner they were going to or something… I don't know.' She spoke in a dull, flat voice, devoid of any emotion. Lily needed to be like that, otherwise she would have broken down. 'I banished my trunk home and apparated to the edge of my village, so no-one would see me, you know?' James nodded silently, it made sense of course. 'So I walked towards home and…and…'Lily faltered slightly, breathing deeply to try and regain her composure. 'I knew there was something wrong, somehow…'

James knew the feeling. He had felt it barely hours ago when he too had left for home.

'But by the time I got there, it was too late. I watched them, the men that had been there- all four of them in black cloaks.'

Four? thought James. Surely it couldn't have been the same four that…

'They cast the Dark Mark and disapparated. And that's all I remember. They… they brought my parents here. But I-' a small dry sob escaped her lips, stifled quickly. 'I don't know what's happening.'

James took her hand impulsively. Her fingers were as cold as ice and shaking very slightly. Lily lost the composure she'd held during her story as tears began to pour silently down her face, stained her cheeks as they slid down. James put his arms around her, allowing her to soak his shirt. A fury and a guilt raged through him such as he had never known before. Here they were- two children, just seventeen, and at the mercy of the cruellest man to have walked the earth. But knowing, or even just assuming, that the four men who had attacked Lily's house had been the same that had attacked him and his father earlier that day… And he hadn't been able to stop them. He hadn't stopped them, and they'd ruined Lily's life.

Eventually, exhausted by the events of the day, James fell asleep with Lily still wrapped in his arms. She gently dislodged herself, staring at the haunted face before her. Something was dreadfully wrong…

Back to the present…

To Messrs Lupin, Black & Pettigrew,

In order to relieve any confusion and/or worry about your friend, Mr Potter, I am happy to report that he has returned to school due to unforeseen circumstances. I am hoping that you will follow on in a day or two, perhaps when Mr Foster and Miss Evans are discharged? Until then, I am sure that Mrs Potter will be more than happy to allow you to extend your stay at her house in Godric's Hollow. Upon your return, please see all your professors in order to catch up on any missed work, and encourage the two injured parties to do so as well.

Until then, I'm sure you will be enjoying your freedom and break from lessons. Especially, if you do not mind me saying so, Divination as Professor Drayfuss has recently informed me that Mr Lupin is due to die three successive deaths next Tuesday at the hand of an axe-weilding rabbit. So, for my own peace of mind, please keep clear of pet stores while in London.

Regards-

Albus.P.W.B.Dumbledore

'Mental,' muttered Sirius, folding the parchment and stuffing it into his pocket. 'Absolutely, sodding mental.'

'Well, at least we know where he is,' said Peter.

'What do reckon these "unforeseen circumstances" are?' asked Remus.

'Oh, let's think,' Sirius said sarcastically, striking his "thoughtful" pose (not often seen, it has to be said). 'Maaaaaybe something to do with-' he jerked his head towards the ward door where Lily could be seen trying to walk for the first time in a week. She had taken to it quite well, but was still very weak and had to hold onto things for support. The 'thing' in this instant was Nick, who seemed more than happy to do the duty.

'I dunno,' mused Peter. 'Why would Dumbledore know about that?'

'Good point,' said Sirius, causing Peter to beam with pride. It wasn't every day he received a compliment from one of his idols. 'Well, maybe we'll find out when we get back.'

'Well, Lily's supposed to be discharged tomorrow,' said Remus. 'She told me earlier after Helen did her check up.'

'Well, then tomorrow we shall find out,' said Sirius. And so, feeling slightly happier about the whole situation, he dragged the other two off for lunch, despite the fact it was still only eleven o clock.

Dumbledore's office

James stood in the middle of the office which had had all of its numerous spindly… things… cleared to one side. Dumbledore had picked up one of these gold objects and was talking to it quietly from behind his desk. It kept emitting puffs of lightly scented smoke to which Dumbledore nodded and prodded.

'Yes, yes of course,' he muttered to the ring of smoke that had just puffed out of the instrument. 'But… in essence united?' The ring of smoke changed colour briefly to a deep red and then vanished quite suddenly. Dumbledore nodded once more and stood up, replacing the thing back onto its rickety stand.

'Sir?' James asked.

'Well, something's happened…' Dumbledore trailed off, as though in deep thought.

'Umm… what's happened professor?'

'Goodness dear boy, I don't know! I have no idea how to work these bally things! I was simply told when I was given them that they would answer any question I asked them. So, I have used them for over half a century now and all I've been able to discern is that if the smoke changes in any way, then that's a 'yes'.' James laughed despite himself.

'I, well, I really…'

'I know dear boy. Everyone expects me to know everything, to be the answer to everything. I'm just a simple wizard at heart.'

'But a great simple wizard, sir.'

'I thank you for the compliment.' Dumbledore's eyes twinkled merrily. 'But now, we must be getting on.' James resumed his stance in the middle of the room, closed his eyes and breathed deeply. His glowing had not subsided the previous night- he had in fact been so exhausted following the day's events that he had fallen asleep in the office when he closed his eyes. When he woke up after a succession of disturbing dreams, he found himself in his bed, alone in the dormitory with the glowing extended to his feet and up around his elbows.

'Okay, ready sir.' James braced himself for any mental onslaught that may be about to pound his barriers. But it never came. 'Sir? I said I'm ready.'

'And I…I h-heard you,' came Dumbledore's ragged breath. James' eyes snapped open and he found his headmaster doubled over, panting for breath. He hurried over to him, but Dumbledore waved him off. 'I'm… fine dear boy. Just need to…catch my breath.' A minute later, he was back upright. 'Well Mr Potter, I can safely say that your mental barriers are as strong as ever they were.'

'Okay…' said James, slightly puzzled. At a time of heightened emotional onslaught, Occlumens skills were supposed to dwindle dramatically.

'Shall we try the other direction?' posed Dumbledore. James nodded, warily. He had never much liked entering Dumbledore's mind. Not only did he feel that it was a severe breach of privacy, but there were things in there that no-one should ever see. 'Okay, a few simple questions first. Colour?'

'Puce.'

'Vegetable.'

'Artichoke.'

'Place.'

'Mont Saint Michel.'

'Station.'

'Clapham Junction.'

'And a nightmare of a place is it too. Well, that all seems to be in order,' remarked Dumbledore. 'But it may have just been lucky guess work.'

'I doubt it sir,' said James, eager not to have to enter Dumbledore's mind.

'So do I, James. But I feel it necessary to make sure.' James groaned inwardly. 'It's alright, I'll try not to let you see the nasty ones, if that's what you're worried about.'

'Thank you sir.'

'Well then, after you.'

James braced himself, and then plunged his subconscious right into Dumbledore's. At first he met a slight resistance, but he soon pushed that out of the way to reveal himself in the Great Hall, standing next to a young boy, barely eleven years old, who was shooting small fireworks out of the end of his wand which grew in size as they flew higher. Soon they had a small audience and many of the students were cheering as the fireworks became more and more spectacular. The scene then faded to what seemed to be the end of a Quidditch match. The same boy, slightly older was trudging through the mud, looking thoroughly disgruntled. Then the stadium melted into an office- McGonagall's office to be precise, yet it was Dumbledore who sat behind the desk looking incredibly sad. A knock on the door, and a huge boy entered.

'Hagrid?' whispered James, unheard by the occupants of the room.

The boy's face was tear-stained and he was hiccoughing slightly, but he still looked Dumbledore directly in the eye.

'I have spoken to Headmaster Dippet,' said Dumbledore, sounding as if he too were holding back tears. 'And I believe he may let you stay as gamekeeper.'

'Thank you sir,' said the young Hagrid who promptly burst into tears and collapsed into the chair opposite the desk. Dumbledore started speaking to him, but James could not hear as something seemed to be wrenching him out of the memory. James fought it briefly, and then realised that it was not his place to see the rest of this memory.

'Well,' said the present-day Dumbledore, as James was brought back into the real world and tumbled against the desk behind him. 'Your legilimency skills seem to be unharmed as well. This,' he added, 'is rather peculiar.'

'I don't understand sir. If nothing is wrong with my powers, why is… why am I…' he gestured towards his hands and feet which were lowing with renewed intensity after having seen Hagrid in such distress.

'I have a hunch, but nothing more than that. It is my understanding that you experience, shall we say, a rather large emotional upheaval yesterday.' James merely nodded. 'I think therefore, that you are currently bottling up a lot more energy and magic than your body can cope with. So you are, in a word, leaking.'

'Is it dangerous?'

'I don't see any reason why it should be. But it might be a darn sight annoying.' James nodded again. He didn't have any particular desire to walk around school like a human light bulb.

'Any suggestions?' asked James, hopeful that there might be some remedy to this.

'One, but I'm not sure how easy it will be.' James looked eagerly at the headmaster, slightly fearful of what this might be. 'James, you have to force yourself not to care.'

'Oh.'

'Forcing your emotions down has always seemed to come naturally to you,' said Dumbledore. 'You found your magical core early as a child. And, if I may say so, you have done a commendable job dealing with… the events of last summer.' James said nothing, but continued to stare at the floor. 'This is the sort of technique you have to employ here.'

James took a deep breath, trying to banish all those ugly feeling that had risen up in him yesterday. His magic pulsed gently within him and he focussed on this. Slowly, surely, the glow started to recede. How long he stayed in the office is anyone's guess, but eventually his glow had receded to a bare minimum (making it look like the tips of his fingernails had been painted a rather unsavoury colour).

'Better,' smiled Dumbledore. 'Much better. Although what the effects may be when you come into contact with…ah…other people, I don't know.' He smiled slightly. 'We shall just have to wait and see.'

James nodded, rubbing his arm absent-mindedly.

'Good good.Well, if you have no more questions, I must write a letter of grave importance to the Minister.'

'Sir?'

'All will, hopefully, reveal itself in time, my boy. This concerns slightly touchy staff issues.'

'Madam Ingram?'

'Why yes, actually. How did you know?' James raised an eyebrow at Dumbledore who, after a seconds contemplation, realised that James must have read his thoughts. 'Ah, I see. Well, I'd prefer to keep details confidential until such time as I need to release them.' James realised this was his invitation to leave. He bad Dumbledore farewell and left the office.

Halfway down the corridor, however, he bumped into some people who he really didn't need to bump into right when he was trying to keep his emotions low.

'Ah, Potty. Not got your usual minions with you then?'

'Malfoy,' James said, as coolly as he could muster. 'How was your mini-holiday?'

'Don't push me Potter,' snapped Malfoy.

'Didn't touch you.'

'My my, aren't we quick off the mark this morning,' leered Snape. 'Pity you weren't quick enough to save your girlfriend after the match.'

'She's not my girlfriend,' growled James, who could feel the magic beginning to leak out of his fingers again. And with this group around, there was no way he was going to force it down again.

'Ooh, bitter aren't we?' Malfoy sniggered. 'No need to get ratty with us because you can't even catch yourself a mudblood.'

That's it.

'Malfoy. I don't know whether you really want to die, but if you don't, I suggest you move. Now.'

The Slytherins before him just guffawed among themselves. They hadn't seemed to grasp the fact that any encounter with any Marauder usually ended them up in the hospital wing, which may prove slightly difficult if the school currently had no nurse.

'Potter, eight on one. How good do you think your chances are?' sneered Malfoy.

James braced himself and then let loose all the bottled up energy he'd been harbouring away the past few minutes. The force of the blast knocked all the Slytherins to the ground and each of them was unconscious before they hit it, just like the couple James had done a similar onslaught to last night.

'Pretty good,' muttered James, to Malfoy's limp form before stepping on it to walk down the corridor.

St Mungo's that night

Lily lay in her bed, exhausted from the day's exercise. Her legs were now screaming in protest from the multiple stretches she'd been made to do, her arm was throbbing from where she'd whacked it on a chair when she'd fallen over, and Helen had gone to fetch her a pain-relieving draught. Her thoughts wandered aimlessly around various things- how much work she'd have missed, is her sister had been told of her ordeal (although she sincerely hoped not), if she had any post, …James…

'Here you go hun.' Lily started, she hadn't realised Helen had even re-entered the ward. She took the glass of bright blue liquid and drank it in one gulp, grimacing slightly at the bitter taste.

'Thank you,' she said, smiling up at Helen.

'Looking forward to going back to school?'

Lily nodded vigorously. 'It gets quite boring cooped up after a while.'

'I know what you mean,' Helen said, smiling. 'I'm always glad to let my patients go home cured.' Her face took on a slightly reminiscent look, as though she was thinking back to those she hadn't been able to send home. A tear grew in her eye and shed without her noticing. Lily took her hand automatically.

'You are a wonderful healer, Helen.'

'Thank you,' she whispered. 'But sometimes I'm just not good enough.' Lily didn't say anything, not wanting to cause her any more pain. 'I… did you ever meet James' father Lily?'

'No,' Lily replied honestly. 'He- he died. Didn't he? Last summer.'

Helen nodded silently.

'I'm so sorry.' Helen nodded again.

'He was attacked,' she whispered quietly. Lily's eyes widened, but she made no sound. This was the night it had all happened- she was about to find out what had given James that haunted look he now possessed. 'Frank, and James too.' This time Lily gasped. Her eyes began to fill with tears for the truth she had never known. No-one should have to endure something like that. No-one.

'He, he never told me,' whispered Lily, her eyes brimming with tears. 'I-I was here that day. I knew he, that he wasn't telling me the truth, but I didn't want to pry….'

'That was probably a wise idea.' said Helen, trying to dry her tears. 'If he didn't want to tell anyone, and I know he hasn't, he will have had his reasons. He always tries to protect everyone, he always has. Even when he was little, he would make sure I was holding knives properly. He would deal with the ashwinders in the house, he would get rid of the gnomes and the doxies. Honestly, I swear that boy could have run his own household by the age of nine.' Helen gave a sad little laugh. 'He's always been a troublemaker of course, especially at school- oh the number of letters I've received from them about that boy. But he is very much his own person, very independent and stupidly loyal. But sometimes I feel like he's growing up too fast, that he's too young for himself. If that makes sense?'

'Perfect sense,' whispered Lily.

'Oh, look at me, upsetting you like this. I'm meant to be getting you better!' Helen wiped her face with her hand and stood up, releasing Lily's hand. 'You get some sleep, it's a long journey tomorrow.'

'Thank you Helen.'

'Goodnight sweetie.'

But now Lily's thoughts were no longer wandering aimlessly around various mundane topics. They were focussed very much on James, the little boy who loved his mother so fiercely, who had to witness the attack of his father, who protected his friends by lying about his ordeals. Who had just witnessed Lily reject him for the millionth time in his life. And yet he still liked her… stupidly loyal.

It took Lily a very long time to get to sleep that night.

The next morning- The Leaky Cauldron

'I hate floo,' muttered Lily, grasping her new walking stick tightly as she watched Peter step into the emerald flames and disappear.

'I think it would be best if Lily went with someone, so she doesn't fall out halfway there,' suggested Remus wisely. Nick gladly volunteered for the job, causing Sirius to glare at him.

'She was my emerald-eyed princess first,' he pouted, watching Nick wrap an arm gently around Lily's waist.

'Oh Siri darling, I will always be your princess,' said Lily, blowing him a kiss and stepping into the fireplace with Nick.

'Hogwarts!' shouted Nick as he threw the glittering powder to the floor beneath them. Lily felt herself beginning to spin and grasped Nick's arm for support. He tightened his grip around her as they past fireplace after fireplace, catching brief glimpses of the rooms beyond.

Soon, but not soon enough for Lily, they came tumbling out of the grate, Lily still safely wrapped in Nick's embrace. They stood up, brushing soot off themselves and looking around. They were in a small room off the Entrance Hall and from the sounds of the voices echoing in from the Great Hall, breakfast was in full swing.

'Well, here we are again,' said Lily, picking up her walking stick and walking a few paces to check that she hadn't sustained any more damage to her legs.

'I should probably be getting back to my room. I'll be needing my books for whatever lesson we have now. What do we have now?' asked Nick as they walked into the Entrance Hall itself.

'You have Runes. I've got Arithmancy,' said Lily.

'In that case, fair lady, I shall see you at lunch?'

'Indeed good sir,' grinned Lily, leaning up to kiss him. His arms snaked round her again and she felt herself melting into his hold. They stayed there long enough for both Sirius and Remus to come out tumbling behind them, give them identical 'typical' looks, but they left them in their activity pretty quickly. Their farewell was cut short however, by a loud cough from behind them. They broke apart and saw James leaning lazily against a picture frame, whose occupant was looking slightly disgruntled that he was now hanging at a forty-five degree angle.

'Pardon the interruption, but I brought your books down Lily. Professor Dumbledore wants you getting back into lessons as soon as possible.' He lay the books down on the floor. 'I had thought we might walk to Arithmancy together, but as you seem otherwise occupied…' he nodded at the couple and wandered up the stairs.

'Well, that was weird,' said Nick.

'Yeah…' Lily had been slightly nettled at having seen James so soon after their arrival. And kissing Nick no less… oh, dear. But it had seemed as though he hadn't even cared. Every other boy she'd dated had been given death-stares the whole relationship. And James had always made a point of never talking to her while in her boyfriend's presence. And here he had been, not a death-stare in sight. Strange.

'See you later then,' Nick said, lingeringly kissing Lily once more before heading towards a tapestry at the other end of the hall and disappearing behind it.

Lily walked forwards to collect her books, straightened the picture that James had tilted and then hurried up the stairs (as quickly as was possible when you were just getting used to being vertical again), the path that James had taken mere seconds ago. She assumed he was going to Arithmancy which they both had now. She took a left, and then a right. Sure enough, barely five yards down the narrow corridor, James stood examining a painting. Lily walked up to him and touched him gently on the shoulder. He started at her touch and moved away.

'James-' she started but he held up a hand. She fell silent.

'Don't Lily.' His voice was a little louder than he had meant to come out, and he pushed his magic down, forcing every wild emotion he had, back down. One of his fingers had begun to glow faintly, and he had no wish for it to increase. Force yourself not to care…

'But I-'

'Just. Don't.' He said this with such conviction that Lily herself drew back, slightly shocked. He might have said this with the utmost calm and sincerity, but there was something about it… something… different. Something more, it sounded weird, adult.

'What?' he said. Lily jumped, realising she had been staring at him for what was probably a lot longer than was comfortable.

'Sorry.'

'Did you say something?'

'No.'

'Oh. I thought… never mind.' James turned back to the painting and prodded the baby sitting in his mother's arms. The picture giggled and extended its hand which James grasped (as Lily gasped) and pulled. The picture swung forwards, revealing a small wooden staircase which wound upwards several floors.

'Oh my,' gasped Lily. 'So this is how you manage to beat me to every single Arithmancy lesson, even if you stay in breakfast ten minutes longer…'

'Yup,' said James, smiling slightly. Lily smiled back, hopeful that this small sign might be an indication that life might get back to normal. He extended an arm and gestured for Lily to go first. He followed after her and the picture swung back behind them, plunging them into almost pitch blackness. Lily kept climbing, unaware of anything that might have been happening in the darkness around her. Indeed, she quite oblivious to anything, even the almost horrified and dazed look on James' face as they climbed out from behind a door pretending to be a wall, three floors above where they had started.

'Lily?' She swung round to face James, who peered at her intently. Her eyes had begun to fade back to their original green, but the transition in colour was making them appear almost brown today. He gazed at her deeply, causing her to shift slightly, uncomfortable under his piercing gaze.

'Yes?' she asked quietly.

James paused, then replied in an almost inaudible mutter, 'Nothing.' Lily didn't press him for information, glad that they were at least on speaking terms. James however entered the classroom behind her knowing he would have to miss this lesson.

Sure enough, ten minutes later James could be seen creeping out of the room from which was coming a great deal more noise and smoke that was usually necessary for a N.E.W.T. Arithmancy lesson.

Five minutes later

'Bertie Bott's Every Flavoured Beans,' panted James at the statue which leapt obediently aside, allowing him access to the revolving staircase. Not waiting for a response when knocking, James entered the Headmaster's office and found Dumbledore making a putrid face at his desk.

'Umm, sir?' he asked tentatively.

'Ah, Mr- cough- P-Potter,' choked Dumbledore, attempting to smile. 'I think I may have to change my password…' James stood, extremely puzzled for a moment, before noting the box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavoured Beans sitting open on the desk.

'What flavour sir?' he asked, trying to hide a grin.

'Well, I'm not- cough- entirely sure but it did taste an awful lot like- cough-… vomit.' James winced. The worst he'd ever had was spinach, and he sincerely hoped it stayed that way. Dumbledore conjured up a glass tumbler which then filled itself up with water which he drank gratefully. Setting down his glass he looked up at James and smiled. 'Well, Mr Potter. Now we have established that I am no longer a fan of my favourite sweet, I am sure you 'accidentally' blew up Professor Googe's classroom for a reason.'

'Sorry sir. I did need to leave sir.'

'You might have just asked.'

'Yes, but Sir… you have to leave a classroom in style.' Dumbledore chuckled at this. In his own pranking days, he had blown up many a classroom, so there was no way he was about to condemn him for the same crime.

'Very well…' he prompted.

'Well sir,' said James, drawing a large breath. 'I have reason to believe that we have a very skilled Occlumens residing in my year.'

'Oh?'

Hehehe! Oh I do love my evil plot-twisting fairy. She paid me a visit a couple of nights ago- isn't that groovy? Anyhoo, I would like to warn you that I may not be able to update for a while- this won't be for lack of trying but is mainly because I have some pretty major exams on their way and, much as I love writing, I really don't want to miss getting into uni this year! However, do not give me up as a last cause, because I promise to get going asap after them and who knows… maybe I'll get bored of revision and do a couple more updates in the middle! Wouldn't that be lovely? Teehee.

Thank you to all my scrummy reviewers- you guys are the absolute best, and you all deserve a mountain worth of chocolate and/or cookie dough. However, if you cannot choose between the two, I recommend Ben and jerry's half baked- best of both! And oh so addictive. Warning: do NOT eat if you need to fit into any tight fitting clothing in the foreseeable future!

R xxx