Well I started writing this in July and got really busy showing my horse and getting ready to start school, but I have gotten some interesting reviews since then. I hope I will keep getting them. I know I am not fulfilling traditional roles that we often see these characters in but I hope you'll keep reading and see where I do take them and enjoy my story, and I promise I love Elfangor and he isn't as far out there as you might think. ::smiles:: Sorry so short and a cliff hanger but I will have the next part up soon, I have to get it from another com.

Elfangor

I was sick; I always was after a battle only now in my human morph I could show it. I wanted to throw up but there was no point. Years of covering up my self-disgust came into play. Yes I was a professional soldier, a professional killer, but I did not like what had inevitably became my vocation. It was necessary though to survive our deaths or theirs. It didn't morning it would just be more blood on an already bloodstained tail. I felt drained, I had killed before but this wasn't right, this wasn't me. I wasn't a murderer. A sickening sensation was growing in my stomach.

I walked into my house, a hollow house; it was so quiet and peaceful. It was as if in here I could escape the world. I walked up the stairs, on my way to the bathroom I looked in on Loren sleeping in my room. I prayed she would never know what I had become. Taking my clothes off in the bathroom I through the bloody things into a pile on the floor, I looked at my reflection, my enemies blood was still on my face. I looked back at the pile on the floor; I would have to remember to get those before Loren awoke. I cranked on the shower as hot as my skin could handle it and climbed in, I watched as blood, sweat and water swirled together and went down the drain. Demorphing I let the water rinse my fur clean, I felt it burn the inside of my leg as I accidentally drank it. Twenty minutes later I finally shut the water off and climbed out.

Wiping my hand across the mirror I wiped away the fog and for half a second it wasn't my andalite face I saw but my human face. Shaking off the illusion I did morph human and wrap a towel around my waist. Back to my bedroom to feel around in the dark for my pajamas. Finding them I walked down into the kitchen and began rummaging through the fridge, I finally settled on leftovers from the Chinese food Loren and I had eaten earlier. I sat down and realized I couldn't eat, I wasn't hungry my mind kept wandering. So I followed it back to my first battle…

Alloran, Arbron and I were boarding a yeerk vessel above the Taxxon homeworld, we were of course out numbered and were at risk of being see by yeerk sensors in the Jahar. On top of all that we had the two human cargo, a risk just to have in the first place. It was the first time I felt myself lost in the rush of battle, first time I realized I was a killer and the realization sickened me, but another part of me silently clung to it. When Arbron would have been killed, I killed instead and when Alloran would have been slaughtered it was his opponent whose blood ran the decks. Killing wasn't something I was proud of, but it had become a part of me and no matter how I suppressed that part it was still there.

I was so young back then, so idealistic. I had changed so much, when I first joined the military I could not have imagined myself doing some of the things I had done just to survive, just to live one more day. I had watched good andalites die as wicked creatures had laughed at their suffering and fed them to taxxons. Heard the screams of the tortured, both andalite and yeerk and at times I had been both tortured and torturer. In almost twenty years I had definitely changed, I still had morals but I remembered the lesson that Alloran had taught me his final student. In war you must kill your enemies before they kill you, because someone wins and someone loses. I have learned a lot about ruthlessness, and I had learned that you cannot show a yeerk mercy for you shall not receive any, such is war.

Yes I have a lifetime of regrets and many ways I wish I could the way things were, but I cannot. Every mistake I made was my fault so only I am guilty of my sins. All of my choices led me to this path, the interference of the Ellimist not withstanding. I should have broken along time ago, many far stronger men than I have, Alloran did. A captain once told me there was a time when he was funny and a prankster, but I understand now why he changed. You cannot see so much death and destruction without it becoming a part of you, and that part of you taking hold and becoming you.

We had been on a planet, I don't remember which but we were fighting a surface battle. There were only ten of us left and about fifty yeerks, all of us cut off from our armies waiting to see whose army would arrive first and wipe the other out. We had been there five days, it had never stopped raining our bodies and fur were covered with dirt and blood. The wounded had already died of infection because we had no medical supplies; we had been forced to throw their bodies out of our trench and rock shelter. We had to watch as starving taxxons rushed out and ate their corpses. One of the warriors under me was slowly losing his mind, he was no soldier simply someone who had been required to fight since service had become mandatory. I watched as he walked out into no man's land and slit his own throat. We got a message later that day saying help would not be arriving until the next day, by then we would have been dead the yeerks were growing desperate. That night when they would have killed us as they slept we killed them, and still the memories of that night haunt me, wake me screaming in the darkness … War had changed me, I was no longer the child I was twenty years ago.

No all that mattered was keeping the humans free and living to make a life with Loren and my son. Protecting them at all costs no matter what price is required of me I will pay it, I will do it. It is no longer a question of can I do this, but when will I have to?

I was startled out of my thoughts by Loren placing a hand on my shoulder; I looked up at her she looked as if she had been crying. The clothes! She didn't say a word just reached for my hand and kissed it before she pulled me to my feet and led me to our bedroom. I fell asleep with my head on her chest and her fingers running softly up and down my neck.

Ellimist

I was angry, in all the many years Crayak and I had battled he had never done something so openly provocative. He had never done this, never touched the mind of a pawn. I may have brought given him but he was now trying to take his soul.

I felt my power as my mind reached out across space and time through the galaxy and I summoned him, and felt him shudder. And for a moment I almost thought he would not answer, but like a roving shadow, a ripple in the darkness I felt him. He came.

Alloran

Fools!

The entire pool was silent, even the hosts in their cages sere still not knowing who or what would be a victim of the Visser's rage. Inwardly I taunted him it had been such a long time since he had felt fear, real fear. Yes he feared the council who might take my body from him and put him in some yeerk pool in the back of some ship. They were miles away trapped on their miserable homeworld he was untouchable. The "bandits" are human children he had fought many times but still they had never shaken him as he was now, and yes I was pleased. My own

What will you do now Visser? He's coming for you.

SILENCE. Filth. It will be your death as well.

Elfangor. He could be anywhere, anyone. Chapman's dead, you're next, don't you see it coming? The name was a curse upon him, vile, like acid it scorched. I felt the tremors in my body; he was fighting hard now to control himself, he was insane. Every face was an enemy and every room held a trap.

I killed the andalite filth. I ate him. HE'S DEAD! Then last of the words echoed through out the cavern. Shoving aside the nearest hork-bajir he locked us in his quarters. Restlessly pacing my own thoughts seemed just as lively. The andalite had promised him death many years ago, and we andalites believe for every evil there is a judgement. The ancient andalites of the tribes believed in dead that walked the earth and those that searched for judgement and vengeance found it. That every secret thing, every known thing evil or good would be revealed and rewarded and both came swiftly.

You're a fool andalite. There is no life among the dead, just a clever trick a manipulation. Your people are so desperate they must have the dead fight their wars. Your people are finished. His voice was calm now, clearly he had control, but I have had many years to remember. Years of murder, of rage, too much time to remember the child who had did this too me and too much time to watch the child become a soldier.

Maybe so Visser, may be so…