A/N: I told you guys I'm not done LOL it does warm my heart everytime I read an email of someone favoriting/following/reviewing though

For the record, I'm totally slacking on writing this one and I have FLOWN through Rise III... #guilty
It's because of the mild obsession I have with writing LuciferxZarya scenes.
And Damon's death physically broke me when I first watched it.

But here I am! I promise I'm not going anywhere.
Not even for an original series that could stand a sliver of a chance at making me real money -awkward/nervous laugh-

xoxo
Kuraki-chan

Part II: Oh Lord

26: I'm Left Here With the Pain.

Losing Damon took a piece of me that not even shutting off my humanity could make me not feel. There is not just a hole in my heart where he is supposed to be. Instead, there is an unfillable void. It sucks the life out of me each day I still breathe like a black hole. I had to do something before I went numb entirely, so I did what I do best: murder. I may not be allowed in Mystic Falls, but that doesn't keep morons away from the border. Part of me wants to feel bad for Liz, but I just can't. We got back so many people, but I had to lose Damon? The only person who ever fought tooth and nail for me?

No. Fuck Mystic Falls. And fuck everyone from Mystic Falls. That town is not my home. Damon was my home and now I no longer have that. I no longer have a home.

I know Elena has been looking for me, I can sense it. She's trying to move on and go back to school like the pitiful excuse of a vampire she is, but she can't find me or even Stefan. Bonnie is dead alongside Damon. Last I knew, Jeremy was on a bender. He gets to avoid Elena and stay in Mystic Falls so long as he doesn't want his hunter abilities. I can't say I blame the kid.

Oh right, I can't anyways; I'm doing even worse than the same thing.

I've refused to let anyone find me. Caroline keeps trying, too. She's so hopelessly clung to her pitiful excuse of a 'home'. I know they've checked a couple of my clubs, but by then I'm already long gone. I know Damon wouldn't be proud of the disaster I've become, but what does it matter when he doesn't even exist anymore? He's not on the Other Side to judge me; there is no Other Side anymore. Even with the handful we saved, there's still so many we couldn't.

This is exactly why I never wanted to be the "hero". Heroes always lose loved ones. I take what I want, I do what I want, I kill who I want. I'm not the hero. I never will be. And I'm certainly not gonna bother to try anymore. I'm no hero; I'm a monster. And that's exactly how it's going to stay.

"You're looking awfully derailed, little Roma."

Nova looked up slowly from her blood-tini to find Enzo smirking above her. She really did look like a mess with her hair clearly having gone unbrushed in some days as it fell in knotted waves down her back, her emerald eyes were caked in old black makeup and filled with hatred, and blood stained her heeled boots visibly. "What the fuck do you want, Brit boy?" She hissed back.

Enzo looked around the nightclub curiously. "Don't you find it a tad bit unusual how or why I found you when not even your own progeny can?"

"No," she snarled from her throat before sipping her blood-tini. "And I don't care. Get the fuck out of my face."

"You sure about that, little gypsy? I might just have something up your ally."

"Oh, you've resurrected my fiance from absolute nothingness? No? Get the fuck out of my face."

"Mm, sadly I can't do that, darling. What I can do for you, however, is give you the current address of his brother." He smirked and pulled a piece of paper from his pocket that he held between two fingers.

That's right, she thought as she stared at the paper, even Stefan took off. Couldn't even be bothered to try and patch things up with Elena. Or maybe he was afraid of me and bolted. Who knows?

"Why would I give a fuck about Saint Stefan?"

"Probably because he got to be brought back but not Damon."

"Tch, so did you."

"Yes, but you and Stefan have loathed each other since day one, have you not? Wouldn't it spark some sort of joy to terrorize him when he's living so peacefully?"

She cut her eyes at him as she rose from her seat slowly. "What's your motive, though?"

"Damo once told me he promised Stefan an eternity of misery, and I remember thinking, 'Well, what could his brother have ever done to inspire so much hatred?' But now I get it. Stefan's not a brother to him. Brothers don't give up. So every time I see him doing anything that looks like he's done so, every time he tries to start over in a life that's nothing but a lie, I will make him pay. We could make him pay; bring him the misery he deserves. What do you say?"

A deadly smirk had pulled at her maroon lips as she snatched the paper from his fingers. "I say you've finally used your brains, Enzo. Let's go pay Saint Steffie a visit."

Zina had begun adjusting to life possibly the best of everyone. She had never really settled into Mystic Falls so she got a condo about an hour outside of town. Even though Katia was off with Zarya, she still popped in to see her mom when she could. She would even spend the night and have dinner sometimes. Zina knew her sister was in complete distress, but there was nothing she could do for Nova. She was going to have to grieve. Who Zina did miss, however, was Jeremy. She hated to admit it, but even extensive shopping couldn't fill the emptiness. She was guiltily happy because Bonnie was gone, but she knew Jeremy was suffering because of it. She wished she could console him, but she hadn't really seen anyone since her fight with Saskia.

"Zina?"

She jumped suddenly at the voice, nearly dropping the couple of bags on her arms. Her dark eyes widened. Could she even turn around? She knew he would ask what happened to her, especially with the new scars on her face. She couldn't not turn around though. Not for Jeremy. So she turned in a way that shifted her raven hair over her left eye casually and gave him a soft smile. "Oh, hey, Jeremy. What are you doing out here? I heard you've been staying in Mystic Falls."

Jeremy was clearly unwell. His hair was a mess, clothes wrinkled and presumably already worn for a day or two at least, and his eyes were tired and dark. He shrugged with his hands in the pocket of his black sweatshirt. "Yeah, I have been… but I decided today that I needed a break."

"Are you… are you doing alright?" She asked softly as she took a step closer. He looked down and away. "Jeremy, when was the last time you properly ate something?"

He shrugged again. "I uh… I had a couple pieces of pizza last night."

She nodded slowly. "Right… and how old was that pizza?" When he didn't answer again, she offered a small smile. "I have a place a few blocks away if you want to come over for a while. I can make you actual food to eat with all that liquor you've been drinking if you would like."

He hesitated for a moment. Would it be an insult to Bonnie's memory when he had already begun growing close with Zina prior to the witch's death? What's it matter? He thought bitterly. She couldn't even tell me there was no way to save her… she couldn't let me say goodbye… Finally, he nodded and followed her back to her apartment. It wasn't anything super extravagant, but it was obvious that Zina was coping with everything by shopping. The place was fully furnished with pretty nice stuff, and tons of decorations and clothes.

"You can sit," she told him with a light laugh. "What I'm going to make should take only an hour or two."

Jeremy's tired eyes followed the ravenette as she lightly danced around the modern looking kitchen. He noticed the way she kept her hair just across her left eye. "What happened at the border between you and Saskia?" He asked suddenly. "What happened to your left eye?"

Zina stopped suddenly, her back to him and a pot in her hand. "Saskia is dead now."

"Yeah, I heard that. What happened?"

She sighed and set the pot on the stove, still keeping her back to him. "She came at me for Remiel's Stone and got angry upon realizing what I had is a fake so we fought. It wasn't a pretty battle. I had to use everything I possibly could because apparently Saskia had been using black magic."

"Black magic?"

"The worst form of magic known to the supernatural existence. There are many different forms, some specific to some families, but the three worst are Expression, Dark, and Black."

"What's the difference between dark and black magic though? They sound the same."

"Oh, but they're not. Dark magic is the kind that wiccan folk came up with the rule of three for - whatever you do to someone will come back to you threefold. It has repercussions for using it; sacrifices, if you will. You must be ready to give in order to receive. Black magic…" She shook her head. "Black magic consumes the soul, the body. It becomes infested in your cells. It feeds on you like a parasite. But the opportunities are endless. Your magic is completely free form to do as you please because you are no longer yourself."

Jeremy was silent as he cautiously approached her from behind. "Zina… what did Saskia do to you?" He asked softly.

"It's not so much about what happened to me, but what happened after…"

[Flashback]

Zina spat some blood from her mouth as she forced herself off the ground. Saskia was worse for wear with wrinkles across most of her flesh and not a lot of air making it to her lungs. Each time her blood splattered on the ground the red turned to black. Blood that dripped from her mouth and eyes started red and turned black as it hit the air.

"You aren't looking too good, old hag," Zina huffed as she rose to her feet. "I guess it's taking more out of you for the spell than you anticipated."

Saskia cackled. "Such a naive little thing you are, child. I had thought it would be Nova to be the sister to take my life, but I suppose you will do."

"You want to die? So why are you fighting me?!"

"Do you think that I wish to die simply to not live anymore? No, you foolish child, I always have a plan up my sleeve. And you're doing an exquisite job of helping with it."

Back and forth again they went to blows until Saskia was on the ground coughing and throwing up blood that turned black as she laughed. Zina watched the decrepit woman laugh while black turning blood poured from her eyes, nose, ears, and mouth. Zina felt a jolt to her chest suddenly that knocked the wind out of her; she was forcibly detached from the spell which meant the Other Side was collapsing.

"And then all light will end," Saskia recited in a hoarse and withering voice, "and the world will live in darkness. The very air will be pestilence to humankind. And our brethren, the night creatures, will emerge and feed. Such as our power, such as our kingdom, such as our kiss."

Zina's eyes widened in horror as Saskia crumbled and melted into a pile of goo that turned from red to black. Some of it splattered across Zina's horrified face. As the gooey remains began to bubble, she took a fearful step backwards. What the fuck had Saskia managed to do with her death and black magic? How could they have overlooked her for so long? The bubbling gurgled upwards until it formed some kind of sloppy, creature-looking shape. The black goo solidified around the form until it became a black, scaly seeming flesh. Eyes pried open on what was apparently a face, revealing bloodthirsty red. As soon as it gained sight on Zina, it shredded open a sharp-toothed mouth.

She gasped in a shaky breath, but before she could take off with her vampire speed the thing scrambled between two, three, and four legs at full speed towards her. She turned to flee but it tackled her to the ground. Zina fought against the beast, with claws protruding from what could only be taken as four finger-like appendages on each limb. She was able to hit it with a handful of electricity which made it yelp then snarl, and one of the paw-hands swiped down on her face. Pain flooded her immediately. Greater pain than she had ever endured during childbirth or getting her heart ripped from her chest. Somehow she managed to muster enough electricity to zap the thing off of her so she could take off as fast as she possibly could.

[Present]

"I tried searching for the beast once I healed," she continued, "but I never found it."

"So why are you hiding your left eye?" Jeremy questioned as he gently put a hand on her shoulder to get her to turn around. As she turned he brushed the hair back behind her ear. His brows raised when he saw the scarred gashes across her pale flesh.

Zina smiled sadly. "It's not very pretty to look at, is it? This is the most I could heal from the wound and it took nearly two weeks. The whole first week my skin spent repairing itself. The second I regained my sight. At the end I was left with another mutilating scar…"

The two shared silence for a long minute until Jeremy's hand brushed gently across the scars. She jumped at first, recoiling at such a sweet gesture, then he smiled even though his eyes were still exhausted and mostly lifeless. "I think they look badass. They're battle scars." He shrugged. "You should be more proud of them."

"How could I be proud when I fled like a scared child and let the beast go off to do as it pleases?"

"We'll find it eventually if it even survived. For all you know the thing melted away after. Maybe it crossed the border to Mystic Falls and died. Nothing's come up in the news about violent murders or anything."

Zina sighed. "Except the stunts my sister is pulling."

Jeremy snickered. "You've heard?"

"Of course I have. She's Nova Vasile and she just lost the love of her eternal life with no hope of ever getting him back. I know she's been taunting the border and she's making her way down south as of approximately yesterday."

He raised a brow. "Why would Nova be going south suddenly?"

They both thought for a moment when it came to them simultaneously. "She knows where Stefan is."

Stefan could smell fresh blood downstairs suddenly. Why? With haste and silence he made his way downstairs where he found Ivy with a large, bleeding gash on her neck. She was shaking, crying, and scared. "Ivy, what happened?" He asked immediately. "Are you alright?"

"I ran into a couple of your friends, Stefan," she whimpered.

His eyes widened. "What? Where? Who?"

"She said she was supposed to be your sister in law."

Something sharp and unusually painful launched into the back of his knee suddenly, knocking him to the floor. As he reached for the weapon that was numbing his leg, he recognized one of Nova's daggers. Then he heard the clicking of heels against his wood floor until he was looking up at the ravenette. Blood dripped from her already maroon painted lips. Her raven hair had fully regrown down her back in waves. She donned tight black pants, a crimson blouse that hugged her curves with bell sleeves, and black heeled boots. In one hand she twirled the second dagger casually as she stared down at him menacingly.

"Sissy found you, Steffie," she grinned at him, baring her fangs. "Oh, that's right, Damon died before I could actually become your sister. Not that you would ever see me as your family regardless." She shrugged. "I'm sorry, is my dagger bothering your leg? I do imagine it must be numb now. I've been playing around with various poisons since I've had so much time on my hands now." She bent down and stared him in the eye while she violently ripped the blade from his knee, reveling in his cry of pain.

"Stefan," Ivy whimpered, "what's going on?"

"Ivy, you need to leave," Stefan instructed as he forced himself slowly to his feet. Albeit he had to limp with one leg mostly numb.

"Afraid that's not going to happen, mate," came Enzo who stood against the front door happily. "She's going to get to watch the whole show, then probably end up dead." He shrugged.

Nova advanced on Stefan slowly. He kept backing up until Ivy was against him. "You know, Stefan," the ravenette drawled with her Romanian accent growing thicker, "I contemplated leaving shreds of you outside of the Salvatore crypts. I've honestly dreamed about it for decades. What a shame I'm cut off from my home and my love is dead. Yet, here you stand so selfishly. You couldn't even stand to be around Elena. What happened to working it out with her, hm? You know she's on some kind of witchy drugs now? I guess it takes her to a time where she didn't loathe her life." She shrugged. "I still think the numb of cocaine feels better. If I wanted to hallucinate I would take acid."

"You want to terrorize me, Nova? Go ahead. Just let Ivy go."

"Oh, come now, Steffie, have I ever been such a merciful woman? No, I want you to watch as I tear her limb from limb. Then I'm going to drag you back on whatever drugs and poisons I have on me so you can watch me do the same to Elena. Then I'm going to find Katherine and do it again." She looked behind them suddenly to Enzo. "Do you think I should include Caroline? I heard she had a thing for him for a while and it seems to want to spark again."

Enzo shrugged. "Ah, why not, right? Even if he doesn't get a little hard for the girl she's still such a lovely friend, isn't she Stefan?"

"You're taking this too far, Nova. Enough is enough."

She raised her brows. "I'm sorry, who the fuck do you think you're talking to?" She grinned and laughed right in his face. "Damon promised you an eternity of misery. We're here to keep that promise."

"Yes, Stefan," Enzo added, "we aren't here to kill you, mate! Nah, that would be too quick. We're going to make certain you have the bloody worst eternity possible. Anyone you so much as say 'hello' to we will kill. Any woman you try to be intimate with, we will be there to tear her to pieces."

"Any time you think for even a second you're happy, or content, or calm," Nova whispered venomously in his face, "we will be there over your shoulder to rip it away."

"You're emotional, Nova. You don't want to do this."

"Actually, Stefan, I feel great. That's the key word, right - feel? Yeah, I feel, Stefan. I didn't get my emotions back to spit on Damon's memory. No. Instead, I thought I might use it to fuel my fire. Did you ever figure I would be more volatile when acting upon my emotions rather than when I lock them away?" As she grinned, her fangs extended and eyes darkened with the veins beneath them. "Believe me, Steffie, I'm worse than a monster now."