"Hold still, Chucky!" Jake said sternly as he tried to fit a shoe onto the doll's foot.
"No, fuck you Jake! I don't wanna be dressed up like one of those pageant girls on MTV!"
Chucky and Jake were experimenting with different sets of doll clothes, trying to see if they could find something that Chucky would like. So far Jake hadn't found anything, except that Chucky REALLY hated being told what to do.
"Look, do you want to have a change of clothes or not?" Jake asked as Chucky fought him.
"Just put on the tuxedo, Chucky!" Jake said.
"Ugh, fine, but you owe me for this!" The doll went into the bathroom and changed, then looked in the mirror.
"Hey, Jake, I changed my mind, I look smoking!" Chucky did poses in the mirror like a goofball. "Yeah, this ain't half bad."
He came out of the bathroom and Jake smirked.
"Got a date?" The boy asked jokingly.
"I have a date with killing that bitch Lexy," Chucky retorted.
Suddenly there was a flash, and Chucky shielded his eyes. "What the hell was that?"
"Nothing," Jake said as he hid his phone.
"Did you just take a picture of me in this thing?" Chucky ran at Jake. "Gimme the phone, I'm deleting it right now!"
"No, Chucky, I like it!" Jake protested uselessly.
Chucky grabbed the phone before Jake could save the picture, running off to the corner of the room.
"Hey, give that back!" Jake yelled, running after the possessed doll.
Chucky drew his knife and pointed it at Jake, bearing his teeth at the boy.
Jake stopped and held up his hands in defeat. "Okay, okay, fine. You can delete the picture. Just give the phone back after you're done."
Chucky laughed in victory and looked back down at the screen. "Alright, let's see what we got here." He tapped a few buttons. "Jesus Christ Jake, how the hell do you delete a picture on this thing?"
Jake sighed. "You just have to…" Then he paused as he noticed Chucky scrolling. "What are you doing?"
"You got a notification just now," the doll said. "It's from Devon. I'm checking it out."
"Oh, you're reading my texts now? God, you're like a clingy girlfriend or something." Jake stared at the knife Chucky was still pointing at him. "Would you put that thing down already? I already said you won."
Chucky shook his head. "The fuck I will. Not till I'm done snooping through all this trash. You've really got...hey, what's this?"
That's when Jake started to get nervous. "Can you just delete the picture so we can move on? I've got homework to finish, I don't have time for this."
Chucky didn't respond, his eyes glued to the phone screen.
Jake sighed and rolled his eyes. "Whatever. I have to get back to studying for my math test."
Chucky scoffed as the boy went back to his desk. "You know I killed my math teacher when I was in school? Fucking piece of shit. Always yellin' at me. So glad I quit after sixth grade."
"That's no surprise," Jake said as he sat down and opened his math book.
"What the fuck does that mean, Jake?" Chucky asked in a challenging time as he finally put away his knife.
Jake sighed and rolled his eyes again.
"Stop fucking sighing at me, it's annoying." Chucky said.
Jake ignored him.
"Anyway, back to snooping. Also I wanted to ask you why the hell you have so many tabs open, Jake?" Chucky demanded. "Jesus, there's like twenty fucking things. Twitter, something called Snapchat, and...what have we got here? A Word document?"
Jake sighed again, erasing a wrong answer on his paper.
"What did I JUST say about the sighing, Jake?" Chucky said, only half paying attention.
"Yeah, fuck you too," Jake replied, flipping the pages of his math book.
"Hey, don't fucking swear at me, it's not polite."
"You JUST did it to me!" Jake said in annoyance, turning back to the doll. "Talk about being hypocritical."
"I'm an adult in case you haven't noticed," Chucky said. "You are a kid. Kids can't swear in front of adults, Jake."
"Yeah, well, I'm sure picking up a LOT of creative ways to swear from you lately, you know that?" Jake asked as he chewed on his pencil eraser.
"Whatever. Anyway, if there are NO MORE INTERRUPTIONS, I'd like to get back to seeing what this document has." Chucky opened the Word document. "Oh, it's some stupid story. It's a poem."
"Yeah, I write poems, so fucking what?" Jake muttered.
"Swearing, Jake." Chucky reminded him, eyes still glued to the phone screen. "Okay, this is fucking boring, I'm opening the next one. Oooh, what's this one? 'The Murder Of Captain Fischer.' I'm definitely checking this out."
Jake sighed again.
"If you sigh at me again I'm destroying your homework," Chucky said in a false cheerful tone. "I told you I don't fucking like that."
He looked back down at the phone. "Now to see what this story is all about. It better be good, Jake. My expectations are high right now. Anything with murder involved has GOT to be top-tier in my book."
Jake watched nervously as Chucky skimmed the document. "Well, how is it so far?"
"Hold on, hold on, gimme a minute, will ya?" Chucky said as he kept reading. "I've literally just started, I can't take questions right now. I'll let ya know when I'm finished."
Jake went back to studying for his test while the killer doll read through his story. It had been a little while since he'd worked on the story in general, he was still stuck on the 18th chapter and had no idea how to progress the storyline.
He was almost finished studying for his Arithmetic and Algebra test, just trying to memorize the last few sections of the sheet.
"Oh, that dumb bitch," Chucky said, breaking the silence with a cackle. "You are so dead now!"
Jake turned around with a smirk. "So does that mean you're invested now?"
Chucky shushed him. "Hold on, wait til I'm done to talk to me! I'm reading about Crystal getting her face slowly sliced open! Wow what a dumb bimbo!" He looked up at Jake. "This is why you never split up when there's a killer nearby, always stick together!"
"Yeah, I know," Jake agreed, turning back to his homework. "They always make dumb decisions in horror movies. It's annoying."
"Mhm," Chucky hummed as he returned his attention to the story. "Christopher should have fucked her while he had the chance, they had chemistry. What a shame. Oh well, at least there was some death in this chapter."
Jake didn't respond, too busy writing down some notes in his notebook.
"Wait," Chucky said, "That's it? There's gotta be more! Jake, is there any more?"
"Yeah, there's more," Jake replied, erasing part of his notes and rewriting a sentence.
"Thank Damballa," Chucky sighed with relief. "How much more?"
"About seventeen chapters, but I'm stuck on chapter 18 at the moment,"
Chucky's mouth dropped open. "Seventeen chapters?! Uh, Jake, I'm gonna need to review those chapters as well, right this very second."
"I'm on a schedule right now, actually," Jake said. "I write ahead and then post a chapter once a week on Tuesdays."
"Wait, what day is it?" Chucky said mostly to himself as he looked down at Jake's phone. "It's Friday?! Fucks sake I gotta wait four whole days for the next chapter?! That's forever away!"
"Well, you'll just have to wait like everyone else who reads the story." Jake said as he shut his math notebook and set it aside. "And now I'm done studying for the day, so I can do whatever I want until I go to bed later."
"Fuck waiting, I'm going to go back in time and kill whoever invented it," Chucky muttered angrily.
Jake sighed. "Do you want the link to my profile so you can read what I have of the story so far?"
"Holy FUCK yes!" Chucky said, then stopped himself. "I mean, yeah sure, fine. I guess I'll check it out when I'm not too busy."
"Since when are you busy?" Jake said with a questioning look. "It's not like you have a job or go to school or anything. Also you're not even human, so…"
"I'm not a human ANYMORE," Chucky corrected him. "I used to be."
"Yeah, whatever, I don't care," Jake sighed, flopping down onto his bed and staring at the ceiling. "I'm too tired right now."
"You're too tired to give me the link to your story?" Chucky gave him a look. "You're so full of bullshit on that one."
Jake rolled over onto his side. "I'll do it tomorrow, okay?"
"No, you're doing it now," Chucky walked up to the bed and climbed the side of it. "Or I'll keep bugging you all fucking night if I have to."
Jake groaned in frustration, slammed the pillow over his head. "Leave me alone, Chucky, I have school tomorrow."
"Give me the story, Jake," the doll demanded. "I wanna know what happens next."
Jake didn't respond.
"I know you're not fucking sleeping yet," Chucky sad sternly. He leaned over Jake and stared at his face. "Jake. Jake. Jaaaaake. I'll go kill Lexy tonight if you give me the story in the next five minutes."
Jake cracked open one eye and stared at Chucky, then closed it again.
"Come on, Jake, I'm dying over here," the doll said desperately. "Whaddya want from me?"
"I want you to let me sleep." Jake said, burying his face in his pillow. "I'm exhausted."
"Yeah, well, I'm exhausted too, from your bullshit," Chucky shot back. He climbed off of the bed. "By the way, I know where you keep all of your snacks for your binge-watching sessions of your favorite show."
"Don't you touch my stash!" Jake said without moving.
"Oh, look, there's the drawer!" Chucky said, looking at it.
"Wait til tomorrow, god!" Jake said, getting annoyed.
"There is no god, Jake,"
Jake sighed in exasperation and went quiet again.
"I'm walking towards the drawer," Chucky said, taking a step towards it. "I'm getting closer to your secret stash of junk food. I'll leave it alone if you give me the story right now."
He waited a few seconds and then ran over and opened the drawer. "I opened the drawer, Jake! Gimme the fucking story or I'm eating your... whaddya we got here?"
He dug through the drawer, looking for something that caught his eye. He pulled out a bag of chips. "I'm eating your…" he glanced at the bag. "Taco flavored Doritos? That sounds fucking disgusting. Jake, why do you always buy the weirdest shit?"
He didn't get a response.
"I don't like being ignored, Jake." He walked over to the boy and started poking him. "Gimme the link to the story and I'll let you sleep!"
He crinkled the bag of chips in Jake's ear really loudly.
Jake rolled over and gave Chucky a death glare. "For God sakes, are you always this annoying when you don't get something you want?"
"No, usually I just kill and/or maim the person," Chucky said, "But I can't hurt you because I need you, so this is the next best thing."
Jake sighed and threw the blankets over himself. "I don't care, I'm too tired to care, we'll talk more tomorrow morning. Good night!"
"Fine, until then I'm messing with your stuff!" Chucky went back to Jake's stash of junk food and rummaged around. "Now what can I eat while I look for more good stories? Oh, chocolate chip cookies, those are always good."
"You can't have my cookies!" Jake said, his voice muffled by the pillow. "I didn't plan on sharing when I bought those."
"Wow, Jake, selfish much?" Chucky retorted. "Anyway, what else? We got some goldfish crackers, those are fucking gross so I'll let you have them. A can of Salt and Vinegar Pringles, which I will take."
Chucky grabbed the Pringles and put them on the floor beside him.
"Hmmm, a pack of Hubba Bubba gum, that's the GOOD kind of gum, I'm undecided on that one so I'll come back to that." The doll said.
"Can you stop sorting through my snacks and thinking out loud to yourself?" Jake asked. "It's very annoying and you're disturbing me!"
"Well who's the one who got me into the idea of fanfiction? Cause it's not me, that's all I know." Chucky said. "And by the way, you gotta have the perfect stash of snacks if you want to binge ANYTHING, and you certainly don't have any experience in THAT department." He picked up a box of blueberry candy canes and threw it back down to make his point. "And if you wanna hear annoying, I'll give it to you."
Jake groaned and slammed his face into his pillow.
"Jake makes a weird noise that sounds like a goose being strangled as he hits himself in the face with his pillow, like a fucking moron," Chucky began narrating like a voiceover in a movie. "What will he do next? Who will win, Jake or the pillow? Stay tuned to find out!"
Jake sat up and punched his pillow. "Would you shut up?"
"Jake fights back but it's just not enough!" Chucky continued narrating. "The pillow is too strong! Defeated, he sets his sights onto the amazing Chucky, who refuses to stop bothering Jake until he gives Chucky the link to his story!"
"Fine!" Jake said as he threw back the blankets and stood up. He snatched his phone back. "Since you really want to know that badly, you can find it on A03 under the username 'cooldude25.' Happy now?"
Chucky laughed. "I knew I'd get it out of you eventually! Alright I'll let you sleep now."
"THANK you!" Jake said, throwing the blankets back over himself.
"No, thank YOU Jake. I knew you were worth something."